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Forums > Social Chat > The Bad partner thread

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LMSP
BRONZE Member since Aug 2005

LMSP

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Total posts: 1588
Posted:Not sure if one already exists and I'm too lazy to look!





My ex finished with me when I got too old for him! (I turned 17 and he was 27) Slightly perverted? YES!

(I was sleeping with my future husband behind his back anyway and don't regret a moment because, 4yrs later, we are still together. Comments and stories please......... biggrin

EDITED_BY: LilMissSmartyPants (1126277605)


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Medusa
BRONZE Member since Nov 2003

Medusa

veteran
Location: 8 days at Cloudbreak, 6 in Per...

Total posts: 1433
Posted:My ex slept with his boss (he worked as a body guard at a swingers club) and one of the hookers that worked there too.

He is now engaged and the hooker is pregnant with his baby...and he is a commitment phobe so I think justice was well served in this instance.


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screech


screech

circling on the edge of madness
Location: away with the faeries

Total posts: 889
Posted:thats an unfair thread as i've had ex-girlfriends who have been as bad as any bad ex boyfriend can be

like the one who cheated on me with one of her ex's dumped me and then slept with my best mate 4 hours later


finland finland finland
the country where i want to be
pony trekking or camping
or just watching tv

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TinklePants
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

TinklePants

Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr

Total posts: 4217
Posted:rename it the bad partner thread!

Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible

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Bubbles_
SILVER Member since Nov 2004

Bubbles_

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: mancunian

Total posts: 3383
Posted:Written by: LilMissSmartyPants

Not sure if one already exists and I'm too lazy to look!




im sorry but thats not very fair for those who have to pay for the space.

me personnaly, ive known some nasty guys, but ive never cheated and i never will, and ive told the guys i was with that if they ever cheated on me id kill em ubblol but ive always set the 'honesty policy' at the beggining of relationships, if they have a problem, or want out etc, tell me and vice versa, and supprisingly its worked lol. but i tell that to all my friends/family etc that dont ever lie to me, i always end up knowing that thyre lying.
for example an old friend of mine came up to me and said 'your gonna be pi**ed off with me' and i said well, if you knew it would pi** me off then why do it? but at least your telling me, what is it'
and she basicly told me that she had slept with my ex.
fair enough, she told me, whats done is done, get over it smile

my opinion though is that girls are just as bad as guys when it comes to this topic.


Disclaimer:im not responsible for what i say or do whether it be before,during and after drinking alcoholic substances (owned by BMVC).
Creater of Jenisms(TM)
Virginity like bubble,one prick all gone.

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Kyrian


Dreamer
Location: York, England

Total posts: 4308
Posted:I think girls are a bit worse! But still.... guys can be interesting. I don't think I can actually tell my worst story, both in intrests of it being a pg rated forum and just because in the end everyone would wind up yelling at me, "why did you put up with that".... which is a different thread, I won't get into it here.

But I did have an ex who eventually said (despite copious protests of how he's always be around to help me, even if we wern't together) that he just went out with me because he was desperate to feel like a man!


Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive

Shalom VeAhavah

New Hampshire has a point....

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Igirisujin
SILVER Member since Jul 2005

Igirisujin

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Preston

Total posts: 2666
Posted::O thats terrible.



I have a doozy here for you all. Ide known a guy called steve for roughly 2 years and we were just friends, but very close. Anyway we started going out and after hmm 6 months (give or take a week or two) he left me. Never botherd to say goodbye, never botherd to tell me why, just buggerd off and I never heard from him again.



Got sick of trying to get hold of him after a while couse he was dodging my phone calls, I cought him out by ringing him from a phone box and he answerd st8 away lol



Ah oh well I should also say I split him and his ex up and he came running to me in the first place rolleyes


Chief adviser to the Pharaoh, in one very snazzy mutli-coloured coat

'Time goes by so slowly for those who wait...' - Whatever Happend To Baby Madonna?

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lauz the caterpilla


lauz the caterpilla

goddess of all things slimey and an interchangeable insect!
Location: nottingham - the land of oppor...

Total posts: 2443
Posted:i had a boyfriend who was having a three month affair behind my back with my best friend of the time eek

Shhhhhh! the boobies are trying to sleep.
owner and the property of noddy.
*i was a caterpilla last night wink* - libby_tuesday

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LMSP
BRONZE Member since Aug 2005

LMSP

veteran


Total posts: 1588
Posted:Post deleted by LilMissSmartyPants

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Skulduggery
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

Skulduggery

Pirate Pixie Crew Captain
Location: Wales

Total posts: 8428
Posted:This thread has such a negative vibe to it. Why would you want to celebrate the people that came into your life and caused you pain by dedicating a thread to them? It's one thing to review where things went wrong and learn from it. Its another to wallow in the "Oh poor me" pool of venom and hatred. The only person that hurts is yourself.

If someone does something to you that hurts you or caused you pain, look at why it caused you pain, work out why it happened, then thank them for helping you to learn a life lesson and move on!


Feed me Chocolate!!! Feed me NOW!

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Igirisujin
SILVER Member since Jul 2005

Igirisujin

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Location: Preston

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Posted:Accepting it happend and letting it be out in the open is a way of moving on, its like when you fall over in public and go flying, best thing to do is laugh at yourself.

Theres no point in pretending it never happend , I would much rather laugh and joke about it, since ive spent enough time crying.


Chief adviser to the Pharaoh, in one very snazzy mutli-coloured coat

'Time goes by so slowly for those who wait...' - Whatever Happend To Baby Madonna?

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Kyrian


Dreamer
Location: York, England

Total posts: 4308
Posted:Skul, no offence but your post comes across as really negative. Towards anyone whos talking here. Talking is part of the healing process. I don't see it as

Written by:
celebrate(ing) the people that came into your life and caused you pain by dedicating a thread to them



Its just a little ranting to blow steam off for some, a chance to laugh at some old scars for others, and a chance to tell some stories of long gone ghosts for some people, but other people will know they arn't alone! (Or more things, i'm not trying to be inclusive here).

Some people might be in a venom and hatred stage. They need to get out of it, sure, but talking helps! Most of us are somewhere else.

Incidentally we're *only* talking about partners here, there's loads more people that can hurt us, and I think we could do worse than give people a space to talk where their comfortable. About either, or any.


Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive

Shalom VeAhavah

New Hampshire has a point....

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Valura
SILVER Member since Apr 2002

Valura

Mumma Hen
Location: Brisbane, Australia

Total posts: 6391
Posted:Written by: Skulduggery

This thread has such a negative vibe to it. Why would you want to celebrate the people that came into your life and caused you pain by dedicating a thread to them? It's one thing to review where things went wrong and learn from it. Its another to wallow in the "Oh poor me" pool of venom and hatred. The only person that hurts is yourself.

If someone does something to you that hurts you or caused you pain, look at why it caused you pain, work out why it happened, then thank them for helping you to learn a life lesson and move on!



I totally agree with you miss skully.

learning the lesson from the way another has treated you is a much more positive way of healing then writing about having affairs on a forum where hardly anyone knows the real you, or the situation that you are going through.

I agree kyri that talking is a good way to heal, although personally, if I want to talk about my private hurt I go to someone I trust and love for advice and support, and while that may be someone on this forum (love you moon pixie) I choose to do it in a much more private and positive way.

there are other threads that have the whole "love rant" vibe going on. I am unsure as to why another has been started. Prehaps next time a search wouldnt go too far astray.
Even if you are feeling lazy.


TAJ "boat mummy." VALURA "yes sweetie you went on a boat, was daddy there with you?" TAJ "no, but monkey on boat" VALURA "well then sweetie, Daddy WAS there with you"

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Kyrian


Dreamer
Location: York, England

Total posts: 4308
Posted:
I didn't start the thread, and, certainly searching is good... But nothing thats been active recently is really the same thing. I don't think its guilty of duplication.
(In fact, I did a search, since I've not come into social chat until recently, and there doesn't seem to be anything relevant).

Written by: Valura

although personally, if I want to talk about my private hurt I go to someone I trust and love for advice and support, and while that may be someone on this forum (love you moon pixie) I choose to do it in a much more private and positive way.




fine smile more power to you. not everyone feels the same level of privacy necessary about everything (and certainly you share joys publicly smile) and furthermore not everyone has a "more positive way" to get through things every time, all depends on whats going on.
When people see that things happen to other people, also, they feel less alone. Its like a lighthouse. They might also come upon someone that they want to talk more privately too, certainly there are loads of things which can't be discussed in open forum due to societies issues and other such things...

But I'll address the bottom line:
If you can answer YES to these 4 questions then you may post a reply.
Is it the Truth?
-I'm certainly not posting anything false, I doubt anyone is.
Is it Fair to all concerned?
- In as much as these things ever are. never seen anyone be completly fair in love, altho whether its themselves or someone else they put up/down changes.
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
- Helps people find other people to talk to, feel more comfortable with their problems, etc.... so, yes.
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?
- Nothing is beneficial to everyone! But its not undermining anyone on Hop, and its not even taking a particuarly negative light of the people that are being mentioned, just, yeah, this happened, it sucks....
I think the only people it isn't beneficial to are the ones who don't want to read it (the subjects pretty clear, i don't want to read every post made either! biggrin
and perhaps the moderators don't want to read it either, but I'm sure the moderators don't want to read every thread, and don't find every post beneficial, they're only human. They're just humans who took on a big job smile

We now return to the subject at hand.... (possibly).


Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive

Shalom VeAhavah

New Hampshire has a point....

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Valura
SILVER Member since Apr 2002

Valura

Mumma Hen
Location: Brisbane, Australia

Total posts: 6391
Posted:dont get me wrong Kyri I know that you didnt start the thread and that comment was not for you at all sweetie.I should have made that clearer

"Is it Fair to all concerned?
- In as much as these things ever are. never seen anyone be completly fair in love, altho whether its themselves or someone else they put up/down changes."

I dont think that this thread is fair to all concerned, but thats my view. I do think no names should have been mentioned. people know people, who know people on this website.


TAJ "boat mummy." VALURA "yes sweetie you went on a boat, was daddy there with you?" TAJ "no, but monkey on boat" VALURA "well then sweetie, Daddy WAS there with you"

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LMSP
BRONZE Member since Aug 2005

LMSP

veteran


Total posts: 1588
Posted:I really don't mean to be rude but no names have been mentioned. eek
If you don't like what has been posted here you don't have to read it. rolleyes You could start a positive thread of your own if it means that much, Or not!
I haven't been here long but all I seem to get is critticism. I am starting to think that either nobody likes me or I am actualy a "not very nice" person. I'm sorry but thats me. Why should a thread called "The bad partner thread" be fair to the people who hurt a member of the HoP community? Or any community. Granted not every bad partner is EVIL but if saying it prevents someone developing a selfesteam complex then let them. smile


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screech


screech

circling on the edge of madness
Location: away with the faeries

Total posts: 889
Posted:yeah the thread is there to allow people to blow off steam if you don't want to or need to then don't

there is a similar slightly less negative thread in discussion however i feel both servr a purpose for people feeling mad mad2 however if people are feeling biggrin smilethere are plenty of other threads they can use


finland finland finland
the country where i want to be
pony trekking or camping
or just watching tv

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screech


screech

circling on the edge of madness
Location: away with the faeries

Total posts: 889
Posted:i may well have been acused of being a bad partner mysself

i was in a relationship with a girl the first girl i truly loved but due to issues i don't wanna explain at the mo i walked out in the middle of an argument and never turned back.

i completely cut her off and hurt myself at the same time (i didn't even look at anyone else for a year after) but i felt it had to be that way for the sake of my mental stability.

i still to this day wonder if i did do the right thing and still think about her alot but there's nothing i can do to change things now


finland finland finland
the country where i want to be
pony trekking or camping
or just watching tv

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Valura
SILVER Member since Apr 2002

Valura

Mumma Hen
Location: Brisbane, Australia

Total posts: 6391
Posted:Written by: LilMissSmartyPants

I really don't mean to be rude but no names have been mentioned. eek




untrue.

please go back and reread brit joes post.

My reaction has nothing to do with you and your percieved critisim. I think that this thread is not helpful and there are so many other love rant threads that you could have "blown off steam" in. (e.g the love rant thread in disscussion.)


TAJ "boat mummy." VALURA "yes sweetie you went on a boat, was daddy there with you?" TAJ "no, but monkey on boat" VALURA "well then sweetie, Daddy WAS there with you"

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UCOF
SILVER Member since Apr 2002

UCOF

Carpal \'Tunnel


Total posts: 15414
Posted:" I haven't been here long but all I seem to get is critticism" - Thats crap and utter rubbish! Oh wait.. hug wink



SmartyPants: The has been a name mentioned, but please read the bible. There are more names in that. Some of which are very hard to pronounce. Such as Caiaphas



smile





Valura- I can see where you are coming from, but I do however think that "Steve" isnt really a name wink hang on. that wasnt the answer. You are indeed right that people know people who know people. And im sure that lots of people on here know people called Steve. Some of these Steves may even be gay. But the chances of this specific Steve hearing about this thread, and actually beng bothered to track it down... in my opinion... is negligible. hug2


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LMSP
BRONZE Member since Aug 2005

LMSP

veteran


Total posts: 1588
Posted:thank you hunny hug

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Kyrian


Dreamer
Location: York, England

Total posts: 4308
Posted:I personally think the one in discussion has a really different tone. I did post on it, a slightly different sort of post, a few days ago. I know 3 gay steve's but they're all american smile I suppose i should keep looking....

perhaps we can just leave names out then, but in general....
(I missed steve too!) (that it was mentioned)


Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive

Shalom VeAhavah

New Hampshire has a point....

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LMSP
BRONZE Member since Aug 2005

LMSP

veteran


Total posts: 1588
Posted:Ok back to the point peeps. ubblol

The ex that I mentioned above finished with me when I turned 17 and want for a 15yr old! Is it me or is he a pervert?


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UCOF
SILVER Member since Apr 2002

UCOF

Carpal \'Tunnel


Total posts: 15414
Posted:He does indeed sound dodgy.

I paused for a while trying to decide if I should type "a little" after the word "sound" but I suddenly realised there is no "a little" about that person.

umm


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Vixen
SILVER Member since Jan 2004

Vixen

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Oxfordshire/Wiltshire

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Posted:Ive been trying to avoid this thread ever since it started... its like its drawing me in and making me want to say bad things... ahhh!!!! xxx

tHeReS gOoD aNd EvIl iN EaCh InDiViDuAl fIrE, iDeNtIfIeS nEeDs AnD fEeDs OuR dEsIrEs.

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UCOF
SILVER Member since Apr 2002

UCOF

Carpal \'Tunnel


Total posts: 15414
Posted:frown hug

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LMSP
BRONZE Member since Aug 2005

LMSP

veteran


Total posts: 1588
Posted:Do it! I know you wanna hunny

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Igirisujin
SILVER Member since Jul 2005

Igirisujin

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Preston

Total posts: 2666
Posted:Dooo it tyyype *gets out a Vixen Voodoo doll*

Chief adviser to the Pharaoh, in one very snazzy mutli-coloured coat

'Time goes by so slowly for those who wait...' - Whatever Happend To Baby Madonna?

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Kyrian


Dreamer
Location: York, England

Total posts: 4308
Posted:Well, there are things that are "a little" about him, just, not that! heh. There was a guy who was 26 who was quite interested in dating me when i was 14, but i just didn't think twas a good idea! (I'm sure I was right.)
That said there was a guy when I was 16 that I would have dated if it'd been allowed (he was a bit older, 20's) and I don't think it would have been a bad thing. Speaking of which, I have phone calls to make. I'm a bad girl, not calling people (boys) for weeks just because I don't feel up to looking pretty with everything I'm doing!
(But not quite a bad gf as i'm not dating anyone tongue)


Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive

Shalom VeAhavah

New Hampshire has a point....

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Valura
SILVER Member since Apr 2002

Valura

Mumma Hen
Location: Brisbane, Australia

Total posts: 6391
Posted:Im not going to continue to give this thread energy because its a waste of time, I do however have one last thing to add.

Jon I have had an experience where my car window was smashed and I was threatened becasue of others saying I was *stirring* on home of poi. This happened from someone who wasnt on this site at the time but knew people who were and wasnt a pleasant experience. (Due to the fact that what I had said was taken completely out of context and some of it was even embellished.) All this happened becasue of people who knew people. I learnt from this experience and was doing my best to impart some of the lesson I have learnt from it. Believe me stuff like that happens.


TAJ "boat mummy." VALURA "yes sweetie you went on a boat, was daddy there with you?" TAJ "no, but monkey on boat" VALURA "well then sweetie, Daddy WAS there with you"

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jo_rhymes
SILVER Member since Apr 2005

jo_rhymes

Momma Bear
Location: Telford, Shrops

Total posts: 4525
Posted:i've had rubbish partners, so rubbish in fact that i won't go into what they did because it's too nasty for a nice friendly thread like this one. but i will say that i completely forgave them and am nice and happy now! soooo yaaaaaay!! what doesnt kill you only makes you stronger after all. I reckon this horrible people are the best people because they show us how strong we can be, so hip hip hooray for the horrible girlfriends and boyfriends of the world!! yaaaaay! beerchug

Hoppers are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

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