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Forums > Social Chat > The HoP Book of Chat Up Lines!!!

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loki.c1687
SILVER Member since Jul 2004

loki.c1687

addict
Location: Leeds

Total posts: 546
Posted:So your in a bar/anywhere and in frount of you u see the perfect woman/women or guy....whats the smoothist...funnyist line ur gona use???

mike.c

EDITED_BY: Dom (1115674986)


Rules and responsibities:
These are the ties that bind us.
We do what we do,because of who we are.
If we did otherwise,we would not be ourselves.
I will do what i have to do
And i will do what i must..

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meghann


enthusiast
Location: good ol@ devon. cullompton to ...

Total posts: 302
Posted:damn all of mine have been said... apart from ye olde crappy... have you got a staff in your pocket or are you just glad to see me?

ive learned
life is tough... but im tougher

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Skulduggery
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

Skulduggery

Pirate Pixie Crew Captain
Location: Wales

Total posts: 8428
Posted:Written by: ICoN

Do you believe that men think with their dicks?
Yes.
Then, will you blow my mind?



eek ICoN spank That is even worse that the freak that asked me if he could lick my armpits! ubblol


Feed me Chocolate!!! Feed me NOW!

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loki.c1687
SILVER Member since Jul 2004

loki.c1687

addict
Location: Leeds

Total posts: 546
Posted:i come with a lable from god to u!!!!!
heard it today!!!
mike.c


Rules and responsibities:
These are the ties that bind us.
We do what we do,because of who we are.
If we did otherwise,we would not be ourselves.
I will do what i have to do
And i will do what i must..

Delete

Pigeon_Wigeon
BRONZE Member since Mar 2017

Pigeon_Wigeon

Say what?
Location: Surrey/Portsmouth

Total posts: 4760
Posted:Babe you must be tired... you've been running through my mind all day wink

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Azadondo
SILVER Member since Apr 2005

Azadondo

journeyman
Location: Los Angeles

Total posts: 59
Posted:I was at a bar and my friend actually used this one and made it work

"Excuse me, but my friend and I were arguing and we would like you to settle it-- do pinguens have knees?"

others that would just be funny:

"Playing doctor is for kids! Let's play gynecologist."
"Are you lost ma'am? Because heaven's a long way from here."
"Hey, let's go make some babies."
"Hi, I'm not trying to pressure you, I don't want to have sex without mutual consent; and by the way, you have my consent."
A variant of moon's-- "Nice shoes-- can I try them on after we have sex?"
"Hey somebody farted-- lets get out of here and go back to my place."
"I'm new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment?"


Performing marriages, funerals, baptisisms, last rites and absolving the sins for HoPers for-- not very long actually.

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Alfred
SILVER Member since Jul 2003

Alfred

Altyd Brandend
Location: Orange County, California, US...

Total posts: 149
Posted:you do you like your eggs in the morning?

Fried,Scrammbled,or fertilized?



And then there one about teeth but you'll have to PM me to hear it coz its not forum friendly.



"whats a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?"

"Can i buy you a drink of do you just want the money?"

LOL

"Every time i try to pick up a girl i keep making Freudian Tits."

IF they say "what is that?"

Reply with "A Freudian tit is when you say one thing but you mean your mother...but that cant be father from the truth"

OR

"Nice legs,when do they open?"

"Those are really tight pants how does one get into them?"

"I caught you a delicious bass" (SHout out to Napolean!)

EDITED_BY: Alfred (1115001131)


Spinning makes my world go round

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roarfire
SILVER Member since Jul 2004

roarfire

comfortably numb
Location: The countryside

Total posts: 2676
Posted:I think my favourite funny one would be.

Guy to a girl.

"I'd buy you a drink but I'd be jealous of the straw"


.All things are beautiful if we take the time to look.

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Hanz


Hanz

veteran
Location: Bendigo, Vic, Australia

Total posts: 1328
Posted:lol... some of these are brilliant guys.

Some guy used this on one of my sisters friends:
Walk up to a person in a bar, grab the ice out of your drink, drop it on the floor, step on it and smash it up, then say to the person "now that we've broken the ice wanna come back to my place?"


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Fine_Rabid_Dog


Internet Hate Machine
Location: They seek him here, they seek ...

Total posts: 10530
Posted:Written by: Alfred

"Every time i try to pick up a girl i keep making Freudian Tits."
IF they say "what is that?"
Reply with "A Freudian tit is when you say one thing but you mean your mother...but that cant be father from the truth"




thats the thing about freud.. its all ways about one thing or your mother biggrin


The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."

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ROBZILLA


ROBZILLA

HAIL TO THE KING BABY
Location: MANCHESTER

Total posts: 204
Posted:a classic...

...why don't you sit on my lap, and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up.. wink


I DO NOT REGRET THE THINGS I HAVE DONE, ONLY THOSE I DID NOT DO.

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_VT_
SILVER Member since Jul 2003

Your Face!
Location: el paso, tx

Total posts: 1173
Posted:Exuse me miss, would you happen to have a quarter? I just wanted to call your parent's to tell them what a great job they did.



male- I'm like a bag of M&M's. female- Why is that? male- Because I'll melt in your mouth and not in your hand.



Can I name your thighs? That ones thanksgiving and that one's christmas. Can I come and visit you between the holiday's?


Heroism on command, senseless violence, and all the loathsome nonsense that goes by the name of patriotism - how passionately I hate them!
-Albert Einstein-

Peanut butter... It fills the cracks of the soul! -Paul Blart-

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loki.c1687
SILVER Member since Jul 2004

loki.c1687

addict
Location: Leeds

Total posts: 546
Posted:the last one is ace....
mike.c


Rules and responsibities:
These are the ties that bind us.
We do what we do,because of who we are.
If we did otherwise,we would not be ourselves.
I will do what i have to do
And i will do what i must..

Delete

Sniper
BRONZE Member since Jan 2005

Sniper

Snoochie-boochie-noochies!


Total posts: 663
Posted:hold sign over your head: "FREE $EX! 5 A GO!"... it'll work someday

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Fine_Rabid_Dog


Internet Hate Machine
Location: They seek him here, they seek ...

Total posts: 10530
Posted:umm doesnt "free sex" and then ask for money defy the whole purpose of it being free? tongue Or have i missed a joke?

The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."

Delete

Sniper
BRONZE Member since Jan 2005

Sniper

Snoochie-boochie-noochies!


Total posts: 663
Posted:free for me frd, you're paying :P

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Fine_Rabid_Dog


Internet Hate Machine
Location: They seek him here, they seek ...

Total posts: 10530
Posted:nana

The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."

Delete

Azadondo
SILVER Member since Apr 2005

Azadondo

journeyman
Location: Los Angeles

Total posts: 59
Posted:Here are two more:

"Do you like short love affairs? I hate them. I've got all weekend."

"Brrr! My hands are cold. Can I warm them in your heaving breasts?"

And the greastes pick-up line of all time:

"So, you're a girl huh?"


Performing marriages, funerals, baptisisms, last rites and absolving the sins for HoPers for-- not very long actually.

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munkypunks
GOLD Member since Jan 2005

munkypunks

enthusiast, but not enthusiastic
Location: Los Angeles, California

Total posts: 367
Posted:Written by: roarfire

I think my favourite funny one would be.

Guy to a girl.

"I'd buy you a drink but I'd be jealous of the straw"



Nah, that's just cheap. rolleyes


You can't fall off the floor, but sometimes you need a chair to reach the cookie jar.

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polythene


veteran
Location: London/ Surrey

Total posts: 1359
Posted:uh, they all are, cheap and tongue-in cheek... that's the point, surely?

The optimist claims that we are living in the best of all possible worlds.
The pessimist fears this is true.

Always make time to play in the snow.

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Fine_Rabid_Dog


Internet Hate Machine
Location: They seek him here, they seek ...

Total posts: 10530
Posted:but i wonder if anyones ever pulled with them...



seriously, ladies, what chance has a guy got with any of these lines?

EDITED_BY: Fine_Rabid_Dog (1115071324)


The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."

Delete

polythene


veteran
Location: London/ Surrey

Total posts: 1359
Posted:No chance. Whatesoever. There's not such thing as a good 'line' (I've actually heard one or two of those used, too..eek!)

The optimist claims that we are living in the best of all possible worlds.
The pessimist fears this is true.

Always make time to play in the snow.

Delete

MikeIcon
GOLD Member since Mar 2003

MikeIcon

Pooh-Bah
Location: Philadelphia, PA - USA

Total posts: 2109
Posted:I think the really silly sounding ones have more chance of working than the corny ones...

For instance "So, youre a girl huh?" would be a pretty good one to at least get her giggling.


Let's turn those old bridges we crossed into ashes.
We'll blaze a new trail,
and torch the rough patches.

-Me

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MikeIcon
GOLD Member since Mar 2003

MikeIcon

Pooh-Bah
Location: Philadelphia, PA - USA

Total posts: 2109
Posted:Also, a good one Ive heard of requires no words. You just walk up to your target lady and hand her a packet of salt then walk back to your seat and sit down. Chances are, shell come over and ask why you gave it to her.

Let's turn those old bridges we crossed into ashes.
We'll blaze a new trail,
and torch the rough patches.

-Me

Delete

Azadondo
SILVER Member since Apr 2005

Azadondo

journeyman
Location: Los Angeles

Total posts: 59
Posted:Written by: ICoN

Also, a good one Ive heard of requires no words. You just walk up to your target lady and hand her a packet of salt then walk back to your seat and sit down. Chances are, shell come over and ask why you gave it to her.



Yeah-- but you better have something amazing to throw at her when she gets back to your table.

Ladies--
What pick-up lines have worked on you? Or if not worked at least been used on you?


Performing marriages, funerals, baptisisms, last rites and absolving the sins for HoPers for-- not very long actually.

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JauntyJames
SILVER Member since Dec 2004

JauntyJames

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Hampshire College, MA, USA

Total posts: 3533
Posted:try "so that you would have salt. if you dont want it i'll take it back, but you really do need saly, you know"

-James

"How do you know if you're happy or sad without a mask? Or angry? Or ready for dessert?"

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Pigeon_Wigeon
BRONZE Member since Mar 2017

Pigeon_Wigeon

Say what?
Location: Surrey/Portsmouth

Total posts: 4760
Posted:Lol.... I dont get lines like these...I get.. "so... hows it going?" or.."have I seen you before?" or ... "Nice shoes!!!" that ones usually aimed at my DC Criterias! Erm.. i like the idea of "so..you're a girl ..hows that working out for you?"...thatd make mke giggle... and as for the salt.. I'd probably just put it in my pocket and pray for any snails currently on my garden path... biggrin

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Fine_Rabid_Dog


Internet Hate Machine
Location: They seek him here, they seek ...

Total posts: 10530
Posted:bwahahahaha! Silly ickle slugs... dont half make a pong with salt tho... poor lil guys.. never again!

The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."

Delete

Pigeon_Wigeon
BRONZE Member since Mar 2017

Pigeon_Wigeon

Say what?
Location: Surrey/Portsmouth

Total posts: 4760
Posted:Hee hee I wouldnt really fizzlepop them I'd add the salt to all the ketchup/bbq/brown/mayo packets i have in a drawer

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Fine_Rabid_Dog


Internet Hate Machine
Location: They seek him here, they seek ...

Total posts: 10530
Posted:oh man... my mum does that...

The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."

Delete

Pigeon_Wigeon
BRONZE Member since Mar 2017

Pigeon_Wigeon

Say what?
Location: Surrey/Portsmouth

Total posts: 4760
Posted:Hee hee does she then put the different types like... KFC ketchup... McD's ketchup etc in different pots then see which tastes best...keep those ones and jump on all the others?

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Page: 1234...7

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