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Mags The JediGOLD Member
Fool
2,020 posts
Location: Cornwall, UK


Posted:
Hey, I'm Mags, I live in Cornwall and Fire is my favourite element.

"I believe the cost of life is Death and we will all pay that in full. Everything else should be a gift. We paid the cover charge of life, we were born."

Bill Hicks, February 1988


Mags The JediGOLD Member
Fool
2,020 posts
Location: Cornwall, UK


Posted:
Hang on, if she was Mrs Mags, wouldn't that make her my wife? My Oedipus complex has been in remission since i started taking the new medication thank you very much, and i'd thank you not to talk about it where any one can read about it!

What ever happened to patient - bug confidentiality?

tongue

Yeah, it's my mum, and she has made her own poi. Rock.

devil

"I believe the cost of life is Death and we will all pay that in full. Everything else should be a gift. We paid the cover charge of life, we were born."

Bill Hicks, February 1988


DuncGOLD Member
playing the days away
7,263 posts
Location: The Middle lands, United Kingdom


Posted:
ok now you're scaring me umm

Are they the best poi in the world otherwise known as sock poi?

Can she get us some nice high quality Oz weed through the post? I heard oz weed is lush ubblove peace

Let's relight this forum ubblove


Mags The JediGOLD Member
Fool
2,020 posts
Location: Cornwall, UK


Posted:
You'd have to ask her.



And yes, they're knee high nylon poi. With tennis balls. And she sewed handles on to them.



My mum rules.



devil

"I believe the cost of life is Death and we will all pay that in full. Everything else should be a gift. We paid the cover charge of life, we were born."

Bill Hicks, February 1988


BirdGOLD Member
now available in "advanced"
6,086 posts
Location: Cornwall, United Kingdom


Posted:
*waves at Mags' mum*

Hello, good to see you're keeping an eye on your lad! wink
[/end hijack]

I have relatives in Melbourne too Mags, not sure where exactly but they're there somewhere!

OOOHH!! wouldn't it be wierd if your mum knew them!

My state of mind is not yours to define!

There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."


Mags The JediGOLD Member
Fool
2,020 posts
Location: Cornwall, UK


Posted:
Big place, Melbourne.

"I believe the cost of life is Death and we will all pay that in full. Everything else should be a gift. We paid the cover charge of life, we were born."

Bill Hicks, February 1988


BirdGOLD Member
now available in "advanced"
6,086 posts
Location: Cornwall, United Kingdom


Posted:
Well, yeah, but, but, but, but.......i'd be even wierderer then! tongue

My state of mind is not yours to define!

There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."


SkulduggeryGOLD Member
Pirate Pixie Crew Captain
8,428 posts
Location: Wales


Posted:
welcome RosieMary and a Happy Yayness Day to you and Mags! hug

Feed me Chocolate!!! Feed me NOW!


Mags The JediGOLD Member
Fool
2,020 posts
Location: Cornwall, UK


Posted:
No no no, no welcoming here! Wait til she gets her own Intro Thread.

Oi mother, on yer bike! This thread aint big enough for the both of us.

devil

"I believe the cost of life is Death and we will all pay that in full. Everything else should be a gift. We paid the cover charge of life, we were born."

Bill Hicks, February 1988


Mags The JediGOLD Member
Fool
2,020 posts
Location: Cornwall, UK


Posted:
25th August 11.11am

Here it is folks, yet another pointless post detailing the dullness of my life. Are ya ready and strapped in? Ok then.

Having spent pretty much the whole day online yesterday, i probably lost my mind without truly realising it. Once again i proved myself to be a useless human being, unable to even lend the ear of sympathy to a friend without bringing her down even more by being tactless, thoughtless and relatively pointless.

Blushing and annoyed with myself, i turned to yet another addictive substance, the PS2, and played Vice City until i could stand no more, and dived into bed with Iain Banks. (As you do).

Got woken up at some ungodly hour by my eeeeeeevil children shouting and jumping on me. I sacrificed them to Satan and finally got some peace. Then they woke me up again! Honestly, it's like being harried by a pack of hyenas. Dragged myself out of bed and fed the little imps, and drank a cup of non earl gray tea. In all, a bad start to the day. Still, at least i can have a nice bifter. Aaaaaaah.

Happy Wednesday tout le monde.

devil

"I believe the cost of life is Death and we will all pay that in full. Everything else should be a gift. We paid the cover charge of life, we were born."

Bill Hicks, February 1988


DuncGOLD Member
playing the days away
7,263 posts
Location: The Middle lands, United Kingdom


Posted:
Goddam Satan taking all the best kids, I'd have given you a half oz of green and let you keep your soul for the pair of them.

Oh well, onto the next family .... devil

Let's relight this forum ubblove


oliSILVER Member
not with cactus
2,052 posts
Location: bristol/ southern eastern devon, United Kingdom


Posted:
stil cant believe you drink earl grey....

Me train running low on soul coal
They push+pull tactics are driving me loco
They shouldn't do that no no no


BethMiss Whippy
1,262 posts
Location: Cornwall & Oxford


Posted:
earl grey is yummy, thanks to falmouth 2 and the amount of earl grey i drank, i cant drink normal tea now, it takes waaay too strong and evil biggrin thanks mags!

hug

Aim high and you'll know your limits, aim low and you'll never know how high you could have climbed.


fluffy napalm fairyCarpal \'Tunnel
3,638 posts
Location: Brum / Dorset / Fairy Land


Posted:
don't worry. Even a helium balloon could have broought me down.

Geologists do it in the dirt................ spank


Mags The JediGOLD Member
Fool
2,020 posts
Location: Cornwall, UK


Posted:
*bows to Beth* My pleasure. And top marks to oli for being resourceful and bringing his own bags. Were you ever in the scouts Oli?

Fluff>> footinmouth shrug hug redface hug meditate

August 26th 1.17am

Life feels nice. After taking the kids into town to do some shopping, and optimistically buying loads of veg from the greengrocers, i sat down to think of cunning ways to get them to eat them. Settled on an easy one for tonight, sausage and mash and peas. They normally eat mainly chips and stuff, so i figured some fresh spud'd do them good. Izzy ate the lot. Rhe ate the sausage. I swear if that kid didn't have such a great round belly she'd never survive. Still, what can you do eh? (I could sell them to Bug.... umm)

I guess at some point in the last few days i made the realisation that despite my battling to swim against the tide my life has turned on, i'm really not getting anywhere, and sometimes the best thing is to take a deep breath, turn round, and go with the flow. In Mojo i found someone who truly makes me happy, and that's an experience i totally recommend to everyone. With a bit of luck the two of us will be together again some day (soon would be good smile) but until then there's little to be gained by pressing the issue.

She came over this evening. My friend Steve was already here, he'd come over about 5ish after finishing work. Quality chap. We played Vice City for a little bit, then watched some anime called Memories, produced (and partially directed by) Katsuhiro Otomo, the guy who did Akira and bits of the Animatrix. And lots of other amazing stuff. Twas very SF, very odd, and very cool, with exquisite artwork throughout. Watched it in japanese with english subs. Amazingly epic soundtrack too. Hmmm. So cool.

It felt so nice being with Mojo. Everything just seemed to cease mattering, and we could just be happy together without worrying about what was going to happen next. Steve left to cadge a lift with his parents, and we cuddled until she had to go home to sleep.

I'm smiling. A lot. I am fully aware that a bit of physical and emotional contact doesn't change a thing. That very knowledge makes the whole experience that much nicer. I understand my position now, and i can get a grip on my life for the first time in a while. It's been spinning a little bit recently. Kind of like the way your head still spins when you get off the waltzer, and you can't quite make out which way is down.

Something tells me everything's gonna be ok.

I am leaving this post on auto-hug. If you've just read it, consider yourself hugged. hug

Be happy.

devil

"I believe the cost of life is Death and we will all pay that in full. Everything else should be a gift. We paid the cover charge of life, we were born."

Bill Hicks, February 1988


flash fireBRONZE Member
Sporadically Prodigal
2,758 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia


Posted:
*wipes forehead*

Wow... that was a solid 11 pages reading!

Mags, thanks so much for sharing your life with us. I understand that the point of this thread is for your own healing, but you write so well that I find it a pleasure to share your pain and your joy.

love n light
flash

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DuncGOLD Member
playing the days away
7,263 posts
Location: The Middle lands, United Kingdom


Posted:
ditto Glad I didn't have to read it all in one go tho!!

Let's relight this forum ubblove


Rouge DragonBRONZE Member
Insert Champagne Here
13,215 posts
Location: without class distinction, Australia


Posted:
i like the auto hug! heres one back hug

i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey

Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...


_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
Am glad you're feeling happier

The stress lifts when you go with the flow

Take care

hug

Getting to the other side smile


Mags The JediGOLD Member
Fool
2,020 posts
Location: Cornwall, UK


Posted:
I am constantly amazed that people actually want to spend large chunks of their lives reading about mine. But i'm flattered too.

The point of this diary is not just to help me deal with temporary pain and emotional discomfort, it's also an excersise in openness, to see how transparent i can be. It's also good writing practice to be perfectly honest, and i don't think i could break the habit if i wanted to.

I have never understood life. It seems at it's basest to be ultimately pointless and self-defeating. Birth, procreation, death. Life begets life in an endless cycle not to acheive anything as such; but just to have done it. How can something be so ultimately intangible, yet form the focal point of our thoughts for the bulk of the time that we are able to form thoughts.

I will endeavour to make my life as interesting as possible so that you have something to read, whatever your motivation to read may be.

I'll start tomorrow. Or maybe the next day. biggrin

I'll just skin up first.

devil

"I believe the cost of life is Death and we will all pay that in full. Everything else should be a gift. We paid the cover charge of life, we were born."

Bill Hicks, February 1988


babajagaBRONZE Member
old hand
863 posts
Location: Berlin, Germany


Posted:
wavehello
I am not sure if I should dare, as newbie, to answer here.
And it's hard in English too!!
But reading your stuff almost drags me to it.
It's only my view but you don't have to understand life if you try it it is only exhausting. ubbloco
Just take things as they come eek and make the best out of it cool.
You are an amazing guy hug.
I guess we meet at clapham. weavesmiley weavesmiley weavesmiley

What is psychology?- Looking for a black cat in a dark room. What is psychoanalysis? Psychoanalysis is looking for a black cat in a dark room -- in which there is no cat -- but finding one anyway.


kylievgnewbie
9 posts
Location: nottingham


Posted:
Hello there,
Found this here diary and have just spent quite a while reading through all your posts. Its amazing how captivating reading someone's personal thoughts can be, despite the fact that you are a complete stranger.
I also have come to the conclusion that it wouldn't actually be so interesting if your diary was a positive one. Reading about other people's pain can help you put your own problems into perspective.
Insights into your relationship with Mojo has really reminded me of problems i had with my ex. Except the boot was on the other foot for me. I was with him for a few years, then when we split up he basically behaved like you have.
I still loved him, but for certain reasons just couldnt be with him any more. It pained me to put him through what i did- but for my own sanity i had to. A year on he seems to be in the same place that he was last year, however, my feeling have changed. Everytime he calls me to moan and cry at me my respect for him weakens. I dread speaking to him now as its just so hard. Staying friends with him is all i ever wanted, but its becoming too hard. I just thought that i would share that with you as i am sure that its not what you want with mojo. I'm just saying be careful.
I hope that i havent annoyed you or pissed you off with my 2 cents. Good luck, be happy

_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
Hey Mags,
Well, you sound cheery today biggrin

Life is fairly pointless. We come into this world, distract ourselves with tasks (like reading your diary smile ), or religion, or playing with fire, or worse still 'love' - and then we die. We examine our lives and that of those around us, not only because we can, but because we want to see if there is anything more.
We are all part of that continuous cycle... 'shuffling towards the grave'... but as for understanding it, or a reason for it - lol, I haven't got that far yet biggrin

I guess one reason we are here is procreation (so you can sit back and relax ubblol), but then, we are also the single most destructive thing on this planet... destroying our habitat through our own inherent greed and selfishness.
I suppose that points to an inherent stupidity too.

Ahem... cheeriness prevails biggrin

Mo - I see you've registered (at least, I'm guessing that's you). Hope you're ok and things are less confusing.

Take care both of youse
xx hug hug

Getting to the other side smile


oliSILVER Member
not with cactus
2,052 posts
Location: bristol/ southern eastern devon, United Kingdom


Posted:
Written by: Mags The Jedi


Were you ever in the scouts Oli?






yeap biggrin

Me train running low on soul coal
They push+pull tactics are driving me loco
They shouldn't do that no no no


RosieMarySILVER Member
member
102 posts
Location: SW London, UK


Posted:
Hi all Mags' friends, I've been following the saga with great interest, you all make a lot of good sense, are you listening Son?

I'm slowly learning to swing, wish I had someone to teach me more, but I look at the free lessons and practice them when only the dogs are with me. They think I'm nuts, but at least they don't laugh. I might know the rellies mentioned. Melbourne is a large city but a small town - work that one out. You have to be very careful not to bad-mouth someone here or you might just find you're talking to his auntie! wink

Gotta get back to work, I'll look in again over the w/e. Happy poi-ing everyone. Maybe one day we'll meet up. This is for you, Magnus. hug
Bye for now

RosieMary
----------------------------
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever" ~ Mahatma Gandhi


_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
Awww, I wish my mum would do some poi... I'd be so proud of her biggrin

There's loads of lovely poi people in Melbourne, Mag's mum, and I'm sure some of them would be delighted to meet you and teach you some stuff, it's much easier to learn that way!

I know what you mean with the large city, small town thing. Belfast is the same... without the good weather, stunning scenery, laid back people... errr

Ok, take care
xx

Getting to the other side smile


RosieMarySILVER Member
member
102 posts
Location: SW London, UK


Posted:
Mags said : "Oi mother, on yer bike! "

How can I,? I gave it to you. biggrin LOL ubbrollsmile

RosieMary
----------------------------
"Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever" ~ Mahatma Gandhi


DuncGOLD Member
playing the days away
7,263 posts
Location: The Middle lands, United Kingdom


Posted:
RosieMary is learning to swing! eek

*throws car keys into large bowl*

wink

Let's relight this forum ubblove


Mags The JediGOLD Member
Fool
2,020 posts
Location: Cornwall, UK


Posted:
Friday August 27th

Ok, so yesterday I got stoned, played with the kids, posted on here and vegged about. Then Mojo came over, mid-afternoon, and the four of us went into town to buy food. The hole-in-the-wall has now stopped giving me money. Probably because i'm about £220 over my agreed overdraft limit of £1600. And the rent's due on Wednesday. Hahahahaha. If i didn't laugh i'd have a nervous breakdown i think.

Came home, cooked for the kids. Fed kids. Cooked steak and potatoes for me and Mojo. Invented new way of cooking carrots. Et voila:

1) Slice carrots any way you like. I cut em into little square/rhomboid shapes.

2) Melt a knob of butter in a pan. Put the kettle on to boil

3) Fry carrots in butter for a couple of minutes. Mix up about 1/3 of a pint of boiling water with a vegetable Oxo cube

4) add veg stock to carrots and simmer for about 5 minutes.

5) Drain and serve

Lovely.

Probably not new to the world, but new to me. Went down well.

Put the kids to bed and played a quick game of backgammon on zone.com while Mo went home to feed the cats. She came back around 9ish with a dvd (Sandra Bullock movie called "28 Days", actually pretty good - amazing supporting cast) which we watched while drinking lots of tea.

By the time it had finished and we'd cuddled and watched some truly bizarre crap on tv it was quite late, so she stayed over. We cuddled a bit, but went to sleep pretty quickly.

I woke up this morning with her cuddling me. Felt like i'd died and gone to heaven. How can something that feels so right, be wrong? (And that surely must be a song lyric. Someone must have put that in a country song or something equally cheesy.)

Mo realised she had about 20 minutes to get ready for her driving lesson, rang the instructor to give him the change of pick-up point and dived into the bathroom while i made the tea. She kissed me goodbye and said she'd be back later. Felt nice.

She will be back later. She's forgotten her jumper.

Isabelle is tweaking my nose, so i'm going to go and tie her to the lightning conductor of the local church to answer her questions about whether or not there is a God. Then i suppose i'd better feed her. And Rhe. Don't want you to think i don't feed her. She just doesn't eat. smile

Am in a strange mood today. Happy with sad overtones. Like a two-tone suit, but with emotions instead of garish colours. I guess because of being so close with Mojo, yet in the knowledge that we're not together. It'll take a bit of getting used to, but it's worth it.

Have just sent a mail to Stranger Magazine. I know very little about them (apart from what's on the site) but they posted on my college forums looking for writers, so what the hell.

Lots of love (and other indoor sports)

devil

"I believe the cost of life is Death and we will all pay that in full. Everything else should be a gift. We paid the cover charge of life, we were born."

Bill Hicks, February 1988


DuncGOLD Member
playing the days away
7,263 posts
Location: The Middle lands, United Kingdom


Posted:
Good luck with the wordy people dude, you certainly have a unique style...much like your spinning!! I just hope you don't pull that funny face while you write! ubbloco

Let's relight this forum ubblove


Mags The JediGOLD Member
Fool
2,020 posts
Location: Cornwall, UK


Posted:
...

do i pull faces when i spin?

redface

"I believe the cost of life is Death and we will all pay that in full. Everything else should be a gift. We paid the cover charge of life, we were born."

Bill Hicks, February 1988


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