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Forums > Social Discussion > Parenting- Home of Poi style ;)

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Pele
BRONZE Member since Dec 2000

Pele

the henna lady
Location: WNY, USA

Total posts: 6193
Posted:I think it was GothFrogette who suggested a forum dedicated to HoP parents.
Until then, how about a thread to discuss the joys-and heartbreaks- of being a HoP parent, and perhaps get a little support and advice along the way. smile

I'll start with that my son Noah is now 12 going on 18.
He's obsessed with skateboarding, art and clothes. Plays LaCrosse and (american) Football as well as Violin/Fiddle. Likes girls but still blushes when we mention them. He also still kisses me good night and cuddles with me so I know I haven't lost him to teendom yet, which is a HUGE fear of mine. He gets bored in school but likes it so he can see his friends.

He hasn't picked up a spinning tool since he was maybe 8 or 9. It doesn't bother me either. Just not his thing. He does *love* walking on stilts, and wants me to make him a new pair. Hmmm...makes me think of a post for elsewhere.

He's a good kid. Getting him focussed in school has proven to be our challenge tho. And what a fun one it is. It makes me want to apologize to my mom on a daily basis! Suggestions here so very, very welcome!

Next?


Pele
Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir
"Oooh look! A pub!" -exclaimed after recovering from a stupid fall
"And for the decadence of art, nothing beats a roaring fire." -TMK

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Doc Lightning
GOLD Member since May 2001

Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

Total posts: 13920
Posted:Kid poi? By this I mean making poi out of kids...

*is struck by a thunderbolt*

*screams and runs out the door*


-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

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newgabe
SILVER Member since Mar 2005

newgabe

what goes around comes around. unless you're into stalls.
Location: Bali

Total posts: 4030
Posted:Yep, parents need support alright. And HoP is as good a place to get it as any. But can I suggest a protocol in this thread about naming our young children/ giving identifiable details ? Not only for the generic internet safety reasons. Also to prevent a likely backlash from them to the parent if/when they find out they have been named and written about in a public forum. Particularly those in or approaching teens are likely to be very sensitive to this.

.....Can't juggle balls but I sure as hell can juggle details....

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PK_
BRONZE Member since Dec 2001

PK_

Lambretta Fanatic


Total posts: 4991
Posted:I'd love to post openly here but I shall refrain as the mother of my son is lurking here on HoP along with other websites I frequent where it isn't possible to block users.

*sigh* no freedom.


PK.

"To be an angel, one need not have wings.
In giving love there is an equal grace.
Nor need one seek the aura in the face,
As love unveils the beauty of all things."

*Francois Couperin.

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Pele
BRONZE Member since Dec 2000

Pele

the henna lady
Location: WNY, USA

Total posts: 6193
Posted:You can post how you love him and what you hope for him, and how you might deal with other situations.

Newgabe, everyone here already knows my sons first name...he has it in an intro thread wink But I do agree about the physical nature and such, and for others as well.
Well thought.


Pele
Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir
"Oooh look! A pub!" -exclaimed after recovering from a stupid fall
"And for the decadence of art, nothing beats a roaring fire." -TMK

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squid
BRONZE Member since Mar 2017

squid

sanguine
Location: sur

Total posts: 382
Posted:Yay! Super thread. Ill be joining this fantastic club quite shortly, as my wife is now pregnant and due with our first baby (girl) this coming March.

So now my first question: are all my poi an acceptable thing for the child's mobile, above the crib?


"to a man whose only tool is a hammer, the whole world looks like a nail." Abraham Maslow

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newgabe
SILVER Member since Mar 2005

newgabe

what goes around comes around. unless you're into stalls.
Location: Bali

Total posts: 4030
Posted:Pele, referring to the another current thread regarding 'do you see, do you hear'; different people have different learning styles. Many boys are kinaesthetic (motion based) learners, who find it incredibly frustrating to try to focus in school settings that do not teach in the way they learn best. They may sit still after being forced to, but they can't really learn easily this way and the situation compounds the longer they are at school. NLP or even mainstream educational psychologists should be able to recongise/test for this. It's not a pathology, its' a very valuable way to be, in the 'real world'. It just doesn;t fit well with standard schooling.

Given what you describe your your son being good at, he may be primarily kinaesthetic, in which case the school situation may need to be adjusted for him, not the other way around. Allowing him to doodle, move around, be in subjects that are practical rather than chair/book based may help. And realististically, getting out of school as early as possible can be a real boon for such boys, so long as they have good activities to go to and arent; treated like failures for it.



I don't know enough about the current US system to know what minimal leaving age is (here it is 15; active boys (and girls) can be into lucrative and respectable trades by the time their school mates leave school. Though I recall it was normal when I went to school in USA for everyone to be under pressure to stay till 18 or so: words like 'dropout' were used for people who didn't. Works for some, but a shame for others.


.....Can't juggle balls but I sure as hell can juggle details....

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DarkFyre
BRONZE Member since Nov 2005

DarkFyre

HoP mage and keeper of the fireballs
Location: Palmerston North

Total posts: 1965
Posted:I've got a Lil' en

He's Evil and all I can say is that I have trained him well devil


May my balls of fire set your balls on fire devil

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Felixwah
SILVER Member since Sep 2005

Felixwah

journeyman
Location: Norhwich/Manchester

Total posts: 81
Posted:ive got a little boy called kai he is just coming up to 11months and he is my world! He is very almost walking but hasnt quite got the confidence to take that first step without clinging onto a piece of furniture. He has also cottoned on to kissing and freely gives kisses to pretty much anyone including people on the tv and his teddy bears which is pretty funny. smile

Not really had any major problems with him bar his sleeping routine i think we applied it a tad late but he is getting better now and sleeps through most nights. YAY for sleep smile


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JauntyJames
SILVER Member since Dec 2004

JauntyJames

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Hampshire College, MA, USA

Total posts: 3533
Posted: Written by: squid


So now my first question: are all my poi an acceptable thing for the child's mobile, above the crib?



Not your beamers.


-James

"How do you know if you're happy or sad without a mask? Or angry? Or ready for dessert?"

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Fire_Moose
SILVER Member since May 2007

Fire_Moose

Elusive and Bearded
Location: Scottsdale, AZ

Total posts: 3597
Posted:but deffinatly yer monkey fists......post soak and ignition

O.B.E.S.E.

Owned by Mynci!

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squid
BRONZE Member since Mar 2017

squid

sanguine
Location: sur

Total posts: 382
Posted:Lol! I just caught this after Doc pm'ed me advising me to avoid dangly, toxic items above the crib. ubbangel I just love concerned physicians. ubblove

But I do have several nylon monkeyfists that I made when I was practicing how to make the knot. Hmmm.... Chew toy?


*runs before Doc enters*


"to a man whose only tool is a hammer, the whole world looks like a nail." Abraham Maslow

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Pele
BRONZE Member since Dec 2000

Pele

the henna lady
Location: WNY, USA

Total posts: 6193
Posted:newgabe, our system is absolutely nothing like yours. You are legally not allowed to drop out (in most states) until you have 19. "Basic" education goes through 12th grade (which is actually 13 years with kindergarden). Most kids graduate at 17 or 18.

And literally, that is a basic education. You don't finish it and you really don't have much to build a career on, so it is concidered "dropping out". My sister, my brother-in-law and two of their three children are all drop outs and I can tell you, their lives were alot harder than my other sister, who graduated high school and myself, who graduated college. There are special high school programs where you can also learn a trade (like mechanics or beauty school) to make a non-college transition easier after high school, but you still need to do high school to be in it.

College here is another term for University.

For those who choose to drop out, there is a comptency class and exams that follow that will earn you the equivalency of a high school diploma called a GED, but they can be frowned up as well.

So we in the US encourage our disgruntled teens to finish high school at the very least.

Hell, minimum working age here is 16, some places allow 15 to carry bags of groceries or feed cattle. You can't operate machinery or anything like that until 18 though. So that whole lucrative career thing, not an option...unless he can become a pro skateboarder (like he wants) in that time wink


Pele
Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir
"Oooh look! A pub!" -exclaimed after recovering from a stupid fall
"And for the decadence of art, nothing beats a roaring fire." -TMK

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Mynci
BRONZE Member since Apr 2005

Mynci

Macaque of all trades
Location: wombling free...

Total posts: 8737
Posted: Written by: Pele


Hell, minimum working age here is 16, some places allow 15 to carry bags of groceries or feed cattle. You can't operate machinery or anything like that until 18 though.



dunno if the law has changed but when I was 13 I was allowed to drive a tractor (where I learnt basic driving skills) on a farm (not roads) smile


A couple of balls short of a full cascade... or maybe a few cards short of a deck... we'll see how this all fans out.

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Pele
BRONZE Member since Dec 2000

Pele

the henna lady
Location: WNY, USA

Total posts: 6193
Posted:Mynci, if you are on private property, you are allowed to drive anything (safely).

Noah backs the car down the drive way all the time for me, and it freaks the 8yo next door out completely! lol He has also driven some dirt roads on a friends property.

If Noah were to get a job for someone else on a farm (legally) he would not be allowed to operate a tractor or a milker or anything. Again I say legally cause I know lots of farms allow their young hands to help with such things anyway. wink


Pele
Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir
"Oooh look! A pub!" -exclaimed after recovering from a stupid fall
"And for the decadence of art, nothing beats a roaring fire." -TMK

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Pele
BRONZE Member since Dec 2000

Pele

the henna lady
Location: WNY, USA

Total posts: 6193
Posted:Actually, in an odd association thing the last post got me to thinking...what type of parent are you?

We have friends who really hothouse their kids and force them to do stuff really young, but the kids have *zero* imagination.

Then we have friends who are the waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay overprotective type. I think they want theirs sons clothes to be bubblewrap.

I also know someone who says her style is "interested neglect" and her young daughter is treated more as an adult confidant (including mom venting to daughter about man woes) and her child does what she wants and later reports back to mom. She also presses her daughter to do everything she does (from dance to music to poi to art) in the interest of exposure, but the daughter doesn't always like to be so experimental.

There are so many.
We are fairly proactive parents. We like to be involved in his life but at the same time, while we voice our opinions about things we let him try them anyway to make the mistakes..as long as they are not detrimental.
However, we try to make it clear to him that we are his parents first and will be his friend later.

When Noah was young he was heartbroken to hear me refer to someone adult as my best friend. He yelled at me for him not being my best friend, because I was his. It was quite an eye opener, and rather a rather interesting thing to deal with.


Pele
Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir
"Oooh look! A pub!" -exclaimed after recovering from a stupid fall
"And for the decadence of art, nothing beats a roaring fire." -TMK

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squid
BRONZE Member since Mar 2017

squid

sanguine
Location: sur

Total posts: 382
Posted:Ill be fairly interested in discovering what kind of parent I will be. Both my wife and I are school teachers and ...while I'd like to think I had enough experience from seeing the faults of other parents raising their kids, there is no way Im going to assume that I will end up doing any better.

I just hope I dont end up either over protective. Ill hang myself if I go for "interested neglect" though. wink


"to a man whose only tool is a hammer, the whole world looks like a nail." Abraham Maslow

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