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Forums > Social Chat > tell me what its all for!!! massive whinge

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Mumma Hen
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Member Since: 25th Apr 2002
Total posts: 6391
Posted:Far out... Hard times lately guys. I have been working my ass off and feel like I have nothing to show for it. (in all aspects of my life)
I hardley get time to play with fire like I used to. I havent learnt a new trick in soooo long and feel like Im stagnating.
I also feel like nothing I do changes ANYTHING anymore... WHOA.. I like to make things for people to cheer them up...like little cards and stuff like that...a couple of days later I find them lying on the ground, like they dont matter.Espically at work, I feel like Im not important to the people that matter the most to me
here!!!!Im really sensitive and I am easily hurt but FAR OUT... dont people have any feelings for others anymore?? Im sorry and this proberley doesnt make much sense...I just feel like my calling to help people would be so much easier if people let me know that I matter to them sometimes...I feel like I have been used and taken advantage of lately.
AAARRRRGGGGGGHHHH... what do I do to make my heart lighter?

TAJ "boat mummy." VALURA "yes sweetie you went on a boat, was daddy there with you?" TAJ "no, but monkey on boat" VALURA "well then sweetie, Daddy WAS there with you"

Location: down the bottom of the garden,...
Member Since: 8th Oct 2002
Total posts: 285
Posted:awww im sorry you feel so bad sounds like to just need a bit of time of to just chill out, go for a meal with your friends, anything you want, just your own little escapism

i'll draw you a picture ill draw it with a twist ill draw it with a razorblade ill draw it on my wrist and if i do it right a red fountain will appear washing away my sorrow washing away my fear


Carpal \'Tunnel

Member Since: 17th Apr 2002
Total posts: 15414
Posted:trust me...ive been there..

it that plateaux where no tricks come together...

download someof the vids form arond the site and look at how much stuff you can work on....

i recommend a poi one...or a staff one..


Intrepid Penguin

Member Since: 12th May 2002
Total posts: 5635
Posted:oh honey,

big big BIG massive huge cuddly hugz!

WE LOVE YOU! you are so appreciated here Valura, you are such a beautiful wonderful light on these boards, and I know i'm not the only person who ends up with a big grin on their face after reading something you've posted. You are a caring, lovely person, and yeah, sometimes people are going to ignore that. But rest assured, we dont. We see how fabulous you are and we respect and cherish you for it.

Hang in there ok? sometimes it sucks, but trust me, its worth it! xoxoxxoxoxxoxoxo

Currently on the right side up of the world.

Location: Sydney Australia
Member Since: 22nd Nov 2002
Total posts: 150
Posted:Isn't it fantastic that no matter how yuk things get for us, we can come here to hop & get some shiny happy feelings back in our lives?!

what do I do to make my heart lighter?

imagine buckets of glitter pouring out of your monitor from every graemlin kiss

and rainbows with every hug

Take it easy V

People take different roads seeking fulfillment & happiness. Just because they're not on your road doesn't mean they've gotten lost.-H. Jackson Browne


Location: Normal, Illinois, USA
Member Since: 5th Apr 2003
Total posts: 19

I am very new to all of this. I hope you do not mind my response.

It is so easy to take other people for granted. It seems as though that is what you are living at this moment. Please know that every wonderful thing you do, every kind thought you have, every powerful message you send....you are making someone feel better.

I wish that I knew you so I could give you some specific examples of just how special you are. Believe me when I say, that even though I do not know you, I can see your gift. You are a wonderful person whether people take the time to tell you or not. Your specialness shines through. I do not think people try to hurt your feelings, they just forget to let you know how much they appreciate your positive attitude. They take it for granted because you give it so freely.

You are appreciated, loved and respected for being the wonderful person that you are.

I hope you feel better.

ShyFysh <*}}}}><

In the Eyes of the Goddess...All are Equal, All are Worthy ~Pa'u Zotah Zhaan

I honor the Divine within ~Rev Bem


Mistress of Pink...Multicoloured
Location: Over There
Member Since: 6th Apr 2002
Total posts: 6140

Like Flynt said you are appreciated here! We all appreciate you!

Take care honey

Never pick up a duck in a dungeon...


Lambretta Fanatic

Member Since: 20th Dec 2001
Total posts: 4991
Posted:this should cheer you up! massive hugs and big cheesy smiles . just dont poke me in the eye.


"To be an angel, one need not have wings.
In giving love there is an equal grace.
Nor need one seek the aura in the face,
As love unveils the beauty of all things."

*Francois Couperin.

fluffy napalm fairy
fluffy napalm fairy

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Brum / Dorset / Fairy Land
Member Since: 12th Dec 2001
Total posts: 3638
Posted:Hey baby

I could have a huge rant right now - but I'll save that for another day! Suffice it to say that everything is a load of shit and the harder I try and change it the less of an impact I seem to make. Just the way it is I suppose.

It'll get better - it always does. That's what I'm hoping for anyhoo.

People in general are getting me down - lack of respect, lack of appreciation, people who don't listen....etc. I know exactly how you feel Then one person will do something so lovely that it makes all the bad stuff fly. So I guess it's worth it in the end.

.........sorry for rambling.

Geologists do it in the dirt................ spank


Location: la-la land
Member Since: 15th Feb 2002
Total posts: 2419
Posted:I go thru stages of thinking why the hell do I bother? Whenever I try to go that little extra mile for someone - they sometimes just turn round and kick me in the teeth and more often then not the heart.. I feel that my best friends take advantage of me alot, come round - eat my food, smoke my even my flat mate does that.. but something will happen that will make me smile again.. not to sure what it is this week mind you.. but it'll happen..

Chin up Valura hunny - by you sending out positive vibes out there all the time.. you are doing a good thing - you can't help it if people are unreceptive to the good vibes you have.. it's thier loss darlin - you keep smiling

Never let the b@st@rds grind you down..

I honour you as an aspect of myself..

You are never to old to storm a bouncey castle..


remembers when it was all fields round here
Location: in the works... somewhere...
Member Since: 27th Feb 2003
Total posts: 2790
Posted:You obviously work very hard (although I don't know you ) It will pay off, for you and the people you share So take some well-earned time for yourself. If you can't do that, what can you do? Hope things have been put into perspective for you by all these lovely HoPers

"I thought you are man, but
you are nice woman.




Sounds like you need a change. You cant change other people (directly that is, of course you can attempt to change them by indirect means) but you can change yourself.

Change the way you look at the world (perceptions), or change the way in which you interact with it (behaviour) or change the spot your in (environment).

Get out and do the things you love doing. Spend more time with the people you like, or go out and meet more people that perhaps will appreciate you more. If your work gets you down, change jobs, or decide it really doesnt bother you that much.

Ive found in my life that If you want to change bad things and situations, you have to start from within yourself. Look at the reasons why you feel bad about the people around you or the environment you are in. Do you have too high expectations of them/it?

I try to see myself as a fluid being, constantly interacting with my environment and my thoughts. and as such, I need to maintain a healthy balance of positive influences.

dunno really where this is going, but I can say that I sometimes feel something like what you described, and much of the time, when I start analysing *why* I feel the way I do, it comes back to my expectations of the world. Then I just have to decide to either keep my expectation (ie change my environment/influences) or leave my expectation (change my perception). Both of these things sort me out - depending on which I choose to do.

Life is a Learning Game!


PS about the twirling; keep pushing for moves you dont know - you will get them in the end if its what you want.

[ 14. May 2003, 03:30: Message edited by: [Josh] ]

Raymund Phule (Fireproof)
Raymund Phule (Fireproof)

Enter a "Title" here:
Location: San Diego California
Member Since: 31st Dec 2001
Total posts: 2905
Posted:Valura, sweet sweet Valura. You have acomplished so much in your life. A loving husband, friends around the world, people love you though you may not always know it.

Sometimes life isnt easy, believe me I know this. You feel unapriciated, at times you do more than your fair share only to recieve no thanks. You bend your back for people and feel like they try to break you instead of ease your burdern.

You took time out of your day to try to cheer them up. Though it may seem unappriciated, I tell you it isnt.

Take pride in the fact that you were there for someone. They may not have recieved you well, but you were there. That in itself speeks volumes!

Dont worry, be happy!

Some Jarhead last night: "this dumb a$$ thinks hes fireproof"


Crazy Nutter stuck in Farmidale...
Location: Newcastle, Australia
Member Since: 4th Jan 2003
Total posts: 264
Posted:Valura - I so know how you must feel sometimes, it all just bogs us down occasionally when things all get muddled and yuck...

I get so frustrated sometimes when I try to do all these nice things and then ONE little things comes up that has negative content and THAT is all I hear about...

But remember - look at the posts people have sent you! You mean so much to so many people and you shine a little light in their lives and make a difference to a whole lot of people.

When I read your thread that you started on the 'Pay It Forward' movement I was so amazed at your compassion and beautiful nature....! You are most definitely one of those true stars of the world!

I know you'll keep shining, cause only the brightest stars can shine through the fog....


We all take different paths in life, but no matter which path we take, we take a little of each other everywhere...


Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Berlin
Member Since: 25th Sep 2002
Total posts: 2617
I think you're great and have helped me and many others you don't even know about. I think you're great and value everything you say very highly.
People may not even realised you have helped then let alone take the time to show their appreciation.

chin up baby don't let them grind you down.

I live in a world of infinite possibilities.

King Of Bongo
King Of Bongo

Location: Berlin
Member Since: 25th Dec 2002
Total posts: 522
everyone pin valura to the ground and tickle her!!!

"guitar twiddle, then ben breaks into a really awful imitation of eric idle..."

Some things in life are bad,
They can really make you mad,
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle,
Dont't grumble, give a whistle,
And this'll help things turn out for the best...

...always look on the bright side of life...
(Whistle da dum, da dum ti tum ti tum...)
If life seems jolly rotten,
There's something you've forgotten,
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing,
When you're feeling in the dumps,
Don't be silly chumps,
Just purse your lips and whistle -that's the thing.
And... always look on the bright side of life...

Come on HOPpers, this one's for valura & fluffy napalm faery!!!
(Others start to join in, with equally unharmonious croaks)

Always look on the bright side of life...
For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow
Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin
Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow.
So always look on the bright side of death
Just before you draw your terminal breath
Life's a piece of shit
When you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true
You'll see it's all a show
Keep'em laughing as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you

And always look on the bright side of life...
(Whistle even worse than before)

Always look on the right side of life...
(Whistle- sounds more like a bunch of frogs on e)

Come on guys, cheer up.
Always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the bright side of life...
Worse things happen at sea, you know.
Always look on the bright side of life...
I mean, what have you got to lose?

you know what they say bwian (aka valura on friday nights)...
you've come fwom nuffin,
you're goin back to nuffin,
so what you lost?
Always look on the right side of life...

ok, ok, I'll stop now... but only if u cheer up- otherwise I'll hunt you down and sing to you for the rest of eternity mwahhahahahahahaa!!!

Your life is ending one minute at a time...
So live it.


Sweet talented nutter
Location: Brisbane Oz
Member Since: 3rd Aug 2002
Total posts: 2615
Posted:Ring Ring ! My poor little chicken i'll give you a call later .

that shrewd and knavish sprite

Called Robin Good Fellow ; are you not he that is frighten of the maidens of the villagery - fairy

I am the merry wander of the night -puk


Mumma Hen
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Member Since: 25th Apr 2002
Total posts: 6391
I feel lots better now... I have been very very down lately, and I want you all to know that your lovely words and cuddles have helped me heaps...
Josh... you have made me think deeply about my expectations... which I admit are huge.. I have decided to step back from expectations in my life right now, because of MY beliefs Im allowing myself to be let down. Thanks Josh, you have opened my eyes...Just because someone doesnt love me the way I want to be loved, doesnt mean that they dont love me with all that they have!!!
Flynt, plantgirll, UCOF, Raymund, Trait, shyfysh, beautiful pink poi, kitty, spanner, misstix, Deep soul sheep, pyro hun,King of Bongo, and pukkey
I love you guys thanks for my heart hugs...
Fluffy fairy, I think you really feel where I am at the moment. Please let it be known that I mediatated on this last night and I was told "this too shall pass" I love you fluffly one. I ask the angels for upliftment for both of us ok lil chicken?
I think that the energy around the world at the moment is really unsettling and that a lot of people are picking it up right now...
I love you guys..

TAJ "boat mummy." VALURA "yes sweetie you went on a boat, was daddy there with you?" TAJ "no, but monkey on boat" VALURA "well then sweetie, Daddy WAS there with you"


How do you change this thing???
Location: Behind the couch...
Member Since: 7th Mar 2002
Total posts: 1903
Posted:Hun, you tell me of every post you make... but not this one, I feel so sorry that earlier I never saw how bad this has made you feel. The cards being left on the floor, I watched you pour your heart into making them. Making your paper flowers... you call it quilling, I call it my lil' angels work, and thinking of the kindest words to place in the folds of the cards. You are always so proud of them, you think of something personal to say, and once your finished you glow from ear to ear with your smile.

I'm sorry that you are being treated like this... you only deserve better. It make me so angry to see you try so damn hard and not even be given a thanks. You do your best by everybody I know, you love everybody who has a beating heart... and some who don't. Valura, we all love you... I love you, you are my light, my strength, my weakness, my love... you make me happy, you make me proud. You are my lil angel , my Buble, my Princess, and I love you...

To my dearest Bubble,

For you I give my heart.

Your lil' box of matches, arsn...

I can't hear you... I have a banana in my ear.

"You mean I'll have to use my brain?... but I use staff!!!" ~ ben-ja-men


*shiny shiny*
Location: Townsville, QLD, Aust.
Member Since: 23rd Sep 2002
Total posts: 218
Posted:well Valura darl... you always make me feel like the best when im down!

i dunno what else to say really... other than you have the biggest heart ever created.

and any person who cant see the time and effort and love put into any of your cards obviously need a slap across the face to wake up!

your are the greatest friend anyone could have and i feel lucky to have you as one of mine

And wherever you've gone and wherever we might go. It don't seem fair. Today just disappeared.


Mumma Hen
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Member Since: 25th Apr 2002
Total posts: 6391
Posted:Well Im soo happy... I feel back to my sparkley self...Fairys came and kissed the top of my nose (and they then whispered into my ear that they are on their way to fluffy fairys house)
Thanks for all your help... I have thought deeply about a lot of the things that people (espically josh) said and I realised a few things about myself...LIKE ATTRACTS LIKE HUH? Ill make damn sure from now on that I am going to be as happy as a fire fairy with her first set of fire poi..

TAJ "boat mummy." VALURA "yes sweetie you went on a boat, was daddy there with you?" TAJ "no, but monkey on boat" VALURA "well then sweetie, Daddy WAS there with you"


Intrepid Penguin

Member Since: 12th May 2002
Total posts: 5635
Posted:Hi Valura,

I was listening to Ani Difranco today, and i heard this song and thought of you:

Joyful Girl:

i wonder if everything i do
i do instead of something i want to do more
the question fills my head
i know there's no grand plan here
this is just the way it goes
when everything else seems unclear
i guess at least i know

i do it for the joy it brings
because i'm a joyful girl
because the world owes me nothing
and we owe each other the world
i do it because it's the least i can do
i do it because i learned it from you
and i do it just because i want to
because i want to

Currently on the right side up of the world.

Posted:I'm glad what I said has been of help to you

Stay well,



Ninja Rockstar!
Location: Denver, Co. U.S.A.
Member Since: 27th Nov 2001
Total posts: 1100
Posted:Awww. Don't feel too bad. We all go through it. I went through something like this a year or two ago, but have hope the one thing that you can always count on in life is that things will change (Kind of ironic, the only constant is change... anyway). When I find myself in periods like this I find that it is the best time to evaluate your life and do some spring cleaning as it were (I know it's not spring there, but it is here so bear with me) and sort out all the things that are important to you, all the things you really don't need anymore, and what it is exactly your goals are. Usually when you identify and drop all the dead weight and clutter your life starts back up in no time and you feel fluid and happy again rather than stagnant and lethargic. Kind of like climbing a mountain, you climb and climb untill you reach a ledge where you can sit down, look around, take a drink of water and figure out your way up the next rock face. Also you may find something in your life phisical or spiritual that is keeping you stagnant, a predjudice, opinion, or unrealistic expectation.

But whatever the matter, I hope you feel better soon and find some time to spin like you used to.


Jesus helps me trick people.

sea gypsy
Location: Cornwall
Member Since: 14th May 2003
Total posts: 51
Posted:Breathe in, Breathe out and then look at the sky for longer than usual.

...never just an ordinary girl.

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