Forums > Help! > Live with a monkey on a boat in London?

Login/Join to Participate
Page:
simian110% MONKEY EVERY TIME ALL THE TIME JUST CANT STOP THE MONKEY
3,149 posts
Location: London


Posted:
hello hop people smile wave



due to unforseen rubbish evil landlord stuff...

mad2 meditate

...i've had to move out of my place in Clapham which i moved into only a week ago... frown



...and into a very lovely canalboat in Southall (West London Zone 4) smile smile smile



Thing is, i'm gonna need someone to share it with from mid-november ish

The rent is £325 a month (or £75 a week)

and an extra £20-ish a month to cover bills, council tax, etc...



SO:

Does any HoPper fancy living with on a boat with a monkey?

i'd sooo prefer to live with one of you idiots rather than with an "Ordinary Mature Adult" wink

so i thought i'd ask here before looking for people from the *shudder* "Real World"...



so if you or any friends you have are looking for a place in London then PM me. And feel free to ask questions and stuff in here. i don't even mind if you just wanna talk rubbish, cos it'll keep it bumped smile



oh yeah, about the boat... It's newly refurbished, i'm the first tenant to rent it. Here's some details:-



IT HAS:



Central Heating

from beautiful big iron radiators, reclaimed from a school i think... Heating bills inclusive in rent



Electricity



Broadband is available

(i reckon i'm gonna get it connected pretty soon)



Awesome Bathroom + Shower

with antique bathtub originally belonging to James Murray (who wrote the Oxford English dictionary) and huuuuge great shower head which makes it feel like you're being rained on. Did you ever have a shower at HellzBellz & Bambams' palace? Then you'll know what i'm talkin about biggrin



Kitchen with most mod cons

microwave, gas hob, electric oven, fridge/freezer & washing machine



Moored in a beatiful "Gated Community" in Southall

Secure... postbox for mail... Grassy... Space for play & fire... So pretty you wouldn't believe you're in London... Geese and Swans and that... very nice smile



erm... did i leave stuff out... oh it has lovely wooden flooring.

i'll see if i can sort out some photos so you can all see the lovliness.

awww go on, you'd love it. It's really really nice.

The only disadvantage is you'll have to live with a monkey ubbangel



Details again:

Move in mid-november, earlier is negotiable.

Rent is £325 a month (or £75 a week) + bills (£20 ish)

Interested? PM me if you wanna come check it out. I'll make you tea and everything biggrin

"Switching between different kinds of chuu chuu sometimes gives this "urgh wtf?" effect because it's giving people the phi phenomenon."


Tao StarPooh-Bah
1,662 posts
Location: Bristol


Posted:
ha ha, he asked them to block it lol. that's a real adiction.

well, he can write it from my house if he wants to. smile

I had a dream that my friend had a
strong-bad pop up book,
it was the book of my dreams.


UCOFSILVER Member
15,417 posts
Location: South Wales


Posted:
and they refused to block it... wink

Tao StarPooh-Bah
1,662 posts
Location: Bristol


Posted:
did they? ubblol ubblol ubblol

so how come he can't get on here then?

I had a dream that my friend had a
strong-bad pop up book,
it was the book of my dreams.


UCOFSILVER Member
15,417 posts
Location: South Wales


Posted:
The Giraffes.
umm

SkulduggeryGOLD Member
Pirate Pixie Crew Captain
8,428 posts
Location: Wales


Posted:
Why do the Giraffes always get the blame??? I think thats unfair!

Anyway I'm sure its the worms.

Feed me Chocolate!!! Feed me NOW!


Tao StarPooh-Bah
1,662 posts
Location: Bristol


Posted:
well, if you listen to Pink Floyd - the wall...worms could be quite an accurate description!

danm authority figures...*mumble mumble*

I had a dream that my friend had a
strong-bad pop up book,
it was the book of my dreams.


SkulduggeryGOLD Member
Pirate Pixie Crew Captain
8,428 posts
Location: Wales


Posted:
Don't mention Pink Floyd to me... it brings me out in a rash!

Feed me Chocolate!!! Feed me NOW!


Dr_MollyPooh-Bah
2,354 posts
Location: Away from home


Posted:
If it's the worms then I'll send in the ninja mole to sort them out.

No problem too wriggly smile

Tao StarPooh-Bah
1,662 posts
Location: Bristol


Posted:
Written by: Skulduggery


Don't mention Pink Floyd to me... it brings me out in a rash!




why's that? flashback?

I had a dream that my friend had a
strong-bad pop up book,
it was the book of my dreams.


SkulduggeryGOLD Member
Pirate Pixie Crew Captain
8,428 posts
Location: Wales


Posted:
Kind of Tao. My brothers were big fans and I just have nasty memories of them...... long story not really for a public board

Feed me Chocolate!!! Feed me NOW!


VampyricAcidSILVER Member
veteran
1,286 posts
Location: My House, United Kingdom


Posted:
i love pink floyd biggrin

Proudly Owned By The BMVC

Are You Sniffing My Mitten?


Tao StarPooh-Bah
1,662 posts
Location: Bristol


Posted:
skully....awwww hug

I had a dream that my friend had a
strong-bad pop up book,
it was the book of my dreams.


UCOFSILVER Member
15,417 posts
Location: South Wales


Posted:
ahem

Written by: simian

RE: The ZETA Sanction (Procedure for deployment of):

We must accept and prepare for the possibility, that while in residence of the abode hereby known as "The Inconceivable Doomsday Contraption", we may come under missile or verbal assault from "unknown hostiles".

eg. Young males of diminished mental capacity, intoxicated perpetual itinierants, aggrieved waterfowl etc.

If the hostile individual or organisation refuses to cease their assaults through a reasoned exchange of views, then the necessification of Sanctions will necessarily be made necessary.

Upon the necessification of Sanctions by unknown hostiles, but before the commencement of deployment of Sanctions, there must be a formal verbal notification to cease hostile actions, and a forewarning of the consequences of non-cessation. This "Verbal Notification and Forewarning" should follow the following form:

"We are required to warn you that if you do not cease your current actions, then we are authorised to deploy Sanctions against you"

Then await response. If response is negative, then the second warning follows:

"Is there anything we can say, or any reasonable course of action we can take, that will cause you to cease your current actions?"

Await response. If response is negative, then the use of the Zeta Sanction is Authorised.
(under the auspices of The Ineffably High Council Overseeing Utilisation of the Inconceivable Doomsday Contraption)



AN OUTLINE OF THE STRUCTURE OF THE ZETA SANCTION

The Zeta Sanction makes use of a variable pressure hose, running from a highly efficient 12V(DC) electric pump, which is attached to a large container, into which the Inconceivable Doomsday Contraption's Unfathomable Bathroom Facilities drain their effluent.

This variable pressure hose will ordinarily be deployed in low pressure or "Wide Stream" mode to drain the Unfathomable Bathroom Facilities effluent into chemical toilet dumping stations. In its use as The Zeta Sanction it will be set onto "Narrow Stream".

CARE MUST BE TAKEN WITH THE VARIABLE PRESSURE HOSE ONCE SET TO NARROW STREAM
as the consequences may have a hazardous relevance.

When deploying the Zeta Sanction, the hose should be trained upon the Hostile Target, taking into account any risk factors. Innocent bystanders or wildlife must be clear of the target area, keeping in mind any probable deviation of the stream and "splash factor".

Approved firing method is in short, controlled bursts, fired from the hip. Though due care and responsibility must be observed in use of The Zeta Sanction, it should also be noted that laughing maniacally is not only approved, but fundamentally intrinsic to the use of The Zeta Sanction.




biggrin

SkulduggeryGOLD Member
Pirate Pixie Crew Captain
8,428 posts
Location: Wales


Posted:
ubblol

Feed me Chocolate!!! Feed me NOW!


UCOFSILVER Member
15,417 posts
Location: South Wales


Posted:
The mouse is still not dead.

It seems to be a wiley mouse, that is wise to the way of glue and spring traps.
Next we are to try the fire trap.
It involves a mouse sized tripwire and a blowtorch..... devil

mausBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
4,191 posts
Location: Sihanoukville, cambodia


Posted:
eek

Pink...?BRONZE Member
Mistress of Pink...Multicoloured
6,140 posts
Location: Over There, United Kingdom


Posted:
hug

Oh the boat is amazing.

The Swans eat bread out of your hand. biggrin

And i didn't hear nor see the mouse. I think it's all in their minds tongue

Never pick up a duck in a dungeon...


VampyricAcidSILVER Member
veteran
1,286 posts
Location: My House, United Kingdom


Posted:
YAY ZETA SANCTION *note to self* dont annoy the poi-boat of doom!

Proudly Owned By The BMVC

Are You Sniffing My Mitten?


Ninja_Davemember
58 posts
Location: Bristol


Posted:
that boat was awesome thanx guyz for letting me stay! hope to see ya both soon!

Page:

HOP Newsletter

Sign up to get the latest on sales, new releases and more...