Forums > Social Chat > burps and farts, a bit of a rant

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StoneGOLD Member
Stream Entrant
2,830 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia


Posted:
whats it with guys who insist on burping and farting all the time?

Dont get me wrong, Im not a prude and a well placed burp or fart from either sex can be hilarious. But, Im sick and tired of guys who insist on burping and farting, especially when they think Im sharing some great male joke.

Like my 30 yo male flatmate said great when our female flatmate moved out because now he could burp and fart all he wanted. Like hello! What am I a wall or something, dont my nose and ears work?

I can't believe this guy actually thinks people like hearing and smelling him burping and farting all the time. Especially, as he is "so" empathetic to other peoples feelings. Grrrrrrr.

rant over
If we as members of the human race practice meditation, we can transcend our fear, despair, and forgetfulness. Meditation is not an escape. It is the courage to look at reality with mindfulness and concentration. Thich Nhat Hanh

Mr MajestikSILVER Member
coming to a country near you
4,693 posts
Location: home of the tiney toothy bear, Australia


Posted:
lol, farting isn't usually by choice but i get the burping part "but have you considered there is more to life than your eyelids?"

jointly owned by Fire_Spinning_Angel and Blu_Valley

MedusaSILVER Member
veteran
1,433 posts
Location: 8 days at Cloudbreak, 6 in Perth, Australia


Posted:
I used to date a guy who used to think it was hilarious to burp and fart all the time and he also used to give me in depth details of his visits to the tiolet...blech.

ShuBRONZE Member
Retro Fyre Wizzard
538 posts
Location: Pietermaritzburg (KZN), South Africa


Posted:
it's gotto be the most disgusting habit!

yea we all do it... but i know i don't have the need or urge to share it! Regards Shu (Ice-E FyreStorm - Group Manager & Performer) You know those people your parentals warned you about?... I'M ONE OF THEM! Yes, i do bite!!

MikeGinnyGOLD Member
HOP Mad Doctor
13,922 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA


Posted:
Farting feels good. ubbangel -Mike
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura

The Tea FairySILVER Member
old hand
853 posts
Location: Behind you...


Posted:
Farting on other people's faces feels good. ubbangel

My boyfriend thinks he'll explode or rupture something in his abdomen if he ever tries to hold it in. I'm not convinced this is true...

Anyone know of any health side-effects of not farting/holding it in?

I know they say if you sneeze with your eyes open then your eyeballs will pop out... is this actually true too? Idolized by Aurinoko Take me disappearing through the smoke rings of my mind.... Bob Dylan

boardiesBRONZE Member
member
40 posts
Location: Leeds, Australia


Posted:
holding in farts is really bad for you - fart is methane which is a poisoness gas - a small ammount will not affect you but holding you r fart in will retain a lot of methane in your anal cavity (hee hee) and be detrimental to your health. not sure about risks from not burping as i struggle in that department. Farting though is highly amusing at all times of the day or night, regardless of situation and should be advocated and encouraged. i mean come on, find me one person that doesn't laugh at a fart. they're hilarious, especially on someones face....

Mr_JedlyGOLD Member
member
195 posts
Location: Perth, West Australia


Posted:
You all don't want to spontaneously combust.....do you?
You all remember what happened to Kenny on Southpark... We don't stop playing because we grow old,
We grow old because we stop playing.

blu_valleySILVER Member
fluffy mess
197 posts
Location: Brighton, United Kingdom


Posted:
Farting no, I see the uncomfortableness with that particular gas emission, but you cant knock burping. Its really satisfying,and in some cultures its rude not to burp after eating because it means that you didnt enjoy the food. Im all for burping. Burp Away!!! biggrin "I want to know if you can see beauty even when it's not pretty, every day,and if you can source your own life from its presence.." - Oriah Mountain Dreamer


blueweaverBRONZE Member
newbie
3 posts
Location: Cornwall, United Kingdom


Posted:
I get a sore belly if I hold my farts in, and then when i let it out its just noisier and smellier than it would have been if I'd let it out in the first place.

Anyways, the missus farts way more than I do ubblol Live each day like it's your last!! The belief in a supernatural source of evil is not necessary, men alone are quite capable of every wickedness.

Rouge DragonBRONZE Member
Insert Champagne Here
13,215 posts
Location: without class distinction, Australia


Posted:
why oh god why has this thread reappeared? ubblol

was someone searching for farting? ubblol ubblol i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey

Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...

the_mods_stole_my_nameSILVER Member
travelling without moving
1,286 posts
Location: Maghull, Liverpool, United Kingdom


Posted:
its not as good as my 'fart smells' thread! Heilige Scheie, Batman kommt!

Reality is just a state of mind which occurs through a lack of lsd

XxX owned by devilsarmy XxX

O.B.E.S.E.

BirgitBRONZE Member
had her carpal tunnel surgery already thanks v much
4,145 posts
Location: Edinburgh, Scotland (UK)


Posted:
May I just add that as a frequent flyer to not-that-far-away places I regularly stumble upon stag or hen parties who think the biggest fun in the world is having "whose fart smells worst" on the plane, in the waiting line, on trains etc... I mean, if you HAVE to, that's fine (or tolerable), but it seems it's impossible for more than 3 Scottish men to be together in one place without the fart thing starting!! "vices are like genitals - most are ugly to behold, and yet we find that our own are dear to us."
(G.W. Dahlquist)

Owner of Dragosani's left half

DuncGOLD Member
playing the days away
7,263 posts
Location: The Middle lands, United Kingdom


Posted:
Holding in farts is really bad for you?

I just presumed if you held them in you'd let them go in your sleep when you have a lot less control over your bum muscles ubbangel
Surely having farts inside you for a day won't give you methane poisoning?? Let's relight this forum love

alien_oddityCarpal \'Tunnel
7,193 posts
Location: in the trees


Posted:
BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP


ubblol

either can be funny in the right circumstances but most of the time it is disgusting, and even more so when i found out each fart contains something like 0.1% feacies(sp??)

polaritySILVER Member
veteran
1,228 posts
Location: on the wrong planet, United Kingdom


Posted:
Or 'poop-particles' as my brother puts it.



He's guilty of cupping, being noisy as possible and giving a running commentary while in the bathroom, entering a room with the sole intention of breaking wind in the occupant's presence, and sneaking up behind seated people to fart on their head.



He's 25. I feel sorry for his girlfriend, but at least he's moved out. With him and my sisters 14 year old corgi/terrier cross in the house, we'd have to buy Febreze wholesale wink You aren't thinking or really existing unless you're willing to risk even your own sanity in the judgment of your existence.

Green peppers, lime pickle and whole-grain mustard = best sandwich filling.

KittyKillenthusiast
365 posts
Location: Ontario


Posted:
yikes Have you ever notice that poi is spelled backwords on the key board.............................................creepycool

polaritySILVER Member
veteran
1,228 posts
Location: on the wrong planet, United Kingdom


Posted:
linky You aren't thinking or really existing unless you're willing to risk even your own sanity in the judgment of your existence.

Green peppers, lime pickle and whole-grain mustard = best sandwich filling.

wonderloeyenthusiast
255 posts
Location: Melbourne - home of pirates


Posted:
Why is it the stinky dogs are always the cutest.. My old dog used to fart so badly he would clear the room, look very pleased and depart from the room.

RIP Lord Lochinvar II "You've gone from Loey the Wonder Lesbian to everyone wondering if you are a lesbian." - Shadowman Yesterday is yesterday. If we try to recapture it, we will only lose tomorrow.

ezzBRONZE Member
moo..
1,899 posts
Location: melbourne, australia


Posted:
My friend was dumped after she farted in front of a guy. ubblol hug me!

WOFTSILVER Member
Likes trees...
209 posts
Location: Cape Town, South Africa


Posted:
Burps and farts I can handle (I went to a single sex high school rolleyes), but cupping (or capcaking, as we knew it) is terrible and should be a crime. 'n Boer maak 'n plan.

wonderloeyenthusiast
255 posts
Location: Melbourne - home of pirates


Posted:
dumped for farting? Why?

That's bizarre, does he think she has no colon? "You've gone from Loey the Wonder Lesbian to everyone wondering if you are a lesbian." - Shadowman Yesterday is yesterday. If we try to recapture it, we will only lose tomorrow.

ezzBRONZE Member
moo..
1,899 posts
Location: melbourne, australia


Posted:
She was laughing and it slipped out. He thought women shouldn't fart or at least not infront of people and was so disgusted he broke it off. She just laughed at him and told him he was an idiot and that was the end of that relationship.
hehe Weird boy! hug me!

DuncGOLD Member
playing the days away
7,263 posts
Location: The Middle lands, United Kingdom


Posted:
I know a girl and her first boyfriend was actually confused by the strange noises she used to make in bed at night. His Mom had told him that girls didn't fart and he totally believed her! ubblol Let's relight this forum love

87wt2gxq7veteran
1,502 posts
Location: Birmingham


Posted:
87wt2gxq7 presents....

His Opinion On Farting and Burping!

Gross a lot of the time, funny sometimes. Especially in situations where someone likes the sound of their own voice too much, or is getting too wound up over a trivial matter.

Let a loud one go and watch the look on their face.

10 times better than even the best O RLY? could ever do.

jo_rhymesSILVER Member
Momma Bear
4,525 posts
Location: Telford, Shrops, United Kingdom


Posted:
I enjoy farting. smile Hoppers are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

PerrafordeBRONZE Member
Its Wet and Cold
120 posts
Location: Somewhere far,far away......, Scotland (UK)


Posted:
 Written by: jo_rhymes


I enjoy farting. smile



haaaaaahaaaaaaaa

Well said! ubblol Oh Slothy. I may have been bad. I may have kept you chained up in that room but it was for your own good Either I have a monster in my kitchen or I'm completely crazy