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All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all a...
Member Since: 10th Jan 2003
Total posts: 9831
Posted:so for the larger part of my life, i was a bit of a fatalist. i thought the world was out to get me, nothing was ever going to go my way (because at the time, nothing was), and if something good happened, it would only be a short time before it was ruined by something bad. a lot of you know the number of difficulties and tragedies i've endured over my life, so you may understand why i had that schema.

recently, i've started to change the way i view things. it was so hard for the longest time to see the silver lining, to see the purpose of all the pain. i questioned my faith too many times to count. but now i'm the happiest i've ever been, i'm the strongest i've ever been, and looking back, i'm not sure i would change a second of my past. i know i never would be where i am now if even one moment was different. i've been able to understand that pain and tragedy is inevitable, but i believe there are reasons for them to happen, and there are "silver linings."

anyone who has read the updates on my life in my intro thread knows how gushy happy i am these days. everything seems to have fallen into place after so many years of hard work. and literally hours after posting my update, my grandmother went into the hospital because she wouldn't wake up. my first thought was that i jinxed myself, that i spoke too soon, that everything was going so great, so something bad had to happen. but as i thought about it, i realized that wasn't the case. my grandmother is almost 88 years old, she's tired, she's ready to die. and i don't want her to die, but i want her not to suffer, and i want her to have her dignity, and i know death in inevitable, we can't control it. and as i thought more, i realized i only have one appointment this week, so i can spend the entire week, if necessary, at the hospital. it's a strange thought, but in reality, i suppose life works in mysterious ways. i was "coincidentally" blessed with free time this week to spend with my grandmother. my mother is a schoolteacher, and she's on spring break this week. so she can spend the entire week with her mother without having to worry about work either.

what do all of you believe? do you think things happen for a reason? that there's a "cosmic plan" for everything? that even in the face of sadness, there are small things that happen to make it easier, to relieve as much of the (inevitable) pain we all have to endure at times?

I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.



Location: Galveston, TX
Member Since: 9th Sep 2001
Total posts: 2014
Posted:This is a phenomena that I see occurring in a lot of my friends lately. My take on it is that it is just due to our ages as well as life situations. We've had all the crap, learned how to deal with it, and now it's time to sit back, relax, and enjoy what life has to offer.

My friends are calling it synchronicity and I think that fits.

linden rathen
linden rathen

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: London, UK
Member Since: 2nd Mar 2005
Total posts: 6942
Posted:personally i dont think there is a cosmic plan - i follow mutiple reality idea - all possible universes exsist but you cant access them - i just take it as an article of faith. i think your right that a lot of people will go through similar things over certain time periods just because you end up the same age and so it sorta makes sence. also i think humans are very good at picking out patterns and coincidence often looks that way.

anyway i hope that makes sense.

all the best and make good use of your time with your grandmother - i lost mine when i was 5 and miss her loads even tho i can only remember little bits of her. the pain will never go away - its how you deal with it and create with it that counts smile



Location: Manchester
Member Since: 20th Dec 2004
Total posts: 2530
Posted:i feel that in some ways there is a "cosmic plan" in that no matter what happens to anyone, it will all level out and everyone will have had the same amount of suffering and happiness as everyone else, and that past lives also go towards the difference in happiness and suffering, in a sort of karma effect.

We are the music makers, We are the dreamers of dreams,
Wandering by lone sea-breakers, And sitting by desolate streams;
World-losers and world-forsakers, On whom the pale moon gleams;
We are the movers and shakers of the world for ever, it seems.

Stainless Munchkin
Stainless Munchkin

Master of the Munchkins

Member Since: 20th Mar 2005
Total posts: 246
Posted:im young, but i still have time to sit back and relax, but all that is changing, i have important exams next term(semester) and im spending all the holidays revising, and i have public exams from now until i am about 22(6 yrs) which really sucks, but i can see the silver lining, if i try hard and do well the rest of my life will be so much better. I do loads of extra curricular stuff because i know it will help me in later life (CV) and i still have time to enjoy wat i do (scuba diving, this holiday, is about the most relaxing thing ive ever done so i love it)

p.s. i advise you all to go scuba diving if you can cos it is so relaxing and utterly awesome

Are you that clever that you smile forever? biggrin

What's from the Earth is of the greatest worth

linden rathen
linden rathen

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: London, UK
Member Since: 2nd Mar 2005
Total posts: 6942
Posted:*grins* scuba diving is one of the most amazing things you can do - snorkelling and free diving rocks as well smile

stainless your not the only one - i got A levels soon which is damn scary and these are my last 6 or so months oflife debt free frown


Adya Miriyana
Adya Miriyana

Location: Adelaide
Member Since: 4th Feb 2005
Total posts: 6554
Posted:I wouldn't say entirely 'yes' to whether there is a cosmic plan, I tend to stick with the idea that everything happens for a reason, and that whilst it's not always clear at the time, it always works out in the end. This is not just optimism, I'm not saying everything works out all happy and fuzzy warm all the time, but whatever it does work out to be, you can understand the reasons for it happening so.

Aso to the scuba dving, i certainly agree. I've been scuba diving for a few years now, and it's one of the most amazing things I've done so far. Something you have to experience to really undertand, I think.


Location: Clapham, London
Member Since: 14th Mar 2005
Total posts: 82
Posted:I don't think there is a cosmic plan... I think it all depends how you look at what happens to you. If you are positive you see all the good things and even if something bad does happen to you can say well that has happened but I've got my family, my friends, my house and my self. If you are negative you go into a spiral of negativity which is very hard to get out of. Where one bad thing makes everything else seem worse and before you know it your having a panic attack in Sommerfield (oh look personal experience creeping in). It can be hard to stay positive but it is worth it.
The best tips i ever had are, one if you start to feel really negative go outside even if it's night and raining.
Two, look UP. Unhappy, negative, depressed people look down, so by making a conscious effort to raise your sight line (even just a little bit) you fool your brain into releasing a little bit of happy juice.
Three have something small to look forward to. Even if it's just a hot bath or visiting your mum for tea. It gives you a place in your brain to escape to.
Four, poi is good for this cause you have to concentrate on it so it leaves no time for dwelling, it also makes you physically tired too so you will sleep better.
I know it's a bit off topic looking back but i found these things really useful a while back, and i wanted to pass them on.

In short I think if you look at the world positivly you will think you are having a good life, if you look at things negativly you will think you are having a bad life and the world is out to get you.

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