Forums > Social Chat > Going home
Login/Join to ParticipateSILVER Member
My flabber is gasted
737 posts
Location: waaaay south of heaven, United Kingdom
My flabber is gasted
737 posts
Location: waaaay south of heaven, United Kingdom
Posted:
Due to unforseen circumstances I am having to move back to my parent's house after having lived out in the big wide world for six years and I'm less than happy about it. I'm fiercely proud of the independence I've developed and the life and social circle I've built for myself (including spinny people!) but because of the distances involved I'm going to have to take a step back from that life.
Whilst all my friends there think it's great that I'm going back what bothers me is how much of that independence am I going to lose? Has anyone else been in a similar situation? How did you find it?
Due to unforseen circumstances I am having to move back to my parent's house after having lived out in the big wide world for six years and I'm less than happy about it. I'm fiercely proud of the independence I've developed and the life and social circle I've built for myself (including spinny people!) but because of the distances involved I'm going to have to take a step back from that life.
Whilst all my friends there think it's great that I'm going back what bothers me is how much of that independence am I going to lose? Has anyone else been in a similar situation? How did you find it?
Chaos is the natural state of the universe
Some days I'm the pigeon, some days I'm the statue.
honourary militant margerine ninJAH
If it wasn't for displacement activity I wouldn't get half as much done
Carpal \'Tunnel
7,193 posts
Location: in the trees
7,193 posts
Location: in the trees
Posted:
i had to move back in with my folks a few years back and to tell the truth i hven't really lost any of my independance.
ok so i cant spark up a reffer in the house but it's good because it means i smoke less.
i had to move back in with my folks a few years back and to tell the truth i hven't really lost any of my independance.
ok so i cant spark up a reffer in the house but it's good because it means i smoke less.
BRONZE Member
wandering thru the woods of WI
3,556 posts
Location: Wisconsin, USA
wandering thru the woods of WI
3,556 posts
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posted:
torture, i'd rather have the roof over my head, but lost nearly all my freedom
my parents are very controlling and protective and i didn't come back on the best of circumstances...but even previous situations, no freedom
everyone's parent's are different though
good luck
torture, i'd rather have the roof over my head, but lost nearly all my freedom
my parents are very controlling and protective and i didn't come back on the best of circumstances...but even previous situations, no freedom
everyone's parent's are different though
good luck
Faith
Nay, whatever comes one hour was sunlit and the most high gods may not make boast of any better thing than to have watched that hour as it passed
GOLD Member
Introverted
833 posts
Location: Norf London, United Kingdom
Introverted
833 posts
Location: Norf London, United Kingdom
Posted:
Basically, what Ravehead said.
In some ways it's a bit stifling, but then again I get on really well with my parents (mostly) and I'm certainly smoking less. And my finances are completely in order now, which they haven't been in years! Downsides: everytime I play Xbox my mum says I'm addicted. Grrrrr. And she freaks out if she misses an episode of Neighbours. And my dad's paranoid about noise levels, so I can't play my guitar as loud now.
As long as you don't let your parents get in your way too much, you'll be alright. Just make sure you come and see us lot regularly! Or I'll be forced to hunt you down, hug you and drag you to the pub in Camden. 
Basically, what Ravehead said.
In some ways it's a bit stifling, but then again I get on really well with my parents (mostly) and I'm certainly smoking less. And my finances are completely in order now, which they haven't been in years! Downsides: everytime I play Xbox my mum says I'm addicted. Grrrrr. And she freaks out if she misses an episode of Neighbours. And my dad's paranoid about noise levels, so I can't play my guitar as loud now.
As long as you don't let your parents get in your way too much, you'll be alright. Just make sure you come and see us lot regularly! Or I'll be forced to hunt you down, hug you and drag you to the pub in Camden.
My Mind is a Ship
Emotions become the Waves
Soul is the Ocean
If a quizz is quizzical, what is a test?
Carpal \'Tunnel
7,193 posts
Location: in the trees
7,193 posts
Location: in the trees
Posted:
my mum's like that with my computer rig
i've still yet to push it over 45% but even at 20% i have the neighbours round moaning their plates and cutlery is vibrating DAMD terraced houses
Written by: Sambo_Flux
And my dad's paranoid about noise levels, so I can't play my guitar as loud now.
my mum's like that with my computer rig
i've still yet to push it over 45% but even at 20% i have the neighbours round moaning their plates and cutlery is vibrating
DAMD terraced houses SILVER Member
My flabber is gasted
737 posts
Location: waaaay south of heaven, United Kingdom
My flabber is gasted
737 posts
Location: waaaay south of heaven, United Kingdom
Posted:
Thanks guys. It should be ok, the house has a back room and a conservatory so I expect I'll end up spending most of my time out there rather than in my room or in with the folks. It's just the feeling that my mum is looking over my shoulder all the time, I've already had her say to me "don't forget to pack the pictures on your walls or the food in the fridge" and it was a real grit-your-teeth moment. I appreciate the concern but... I dunno, I guess I just want to look after myself.
Thanks guys. It should be ok, the house has a back room and a conservatory so I expect I'll end up spending most of my time out there rather than in my room or in with the folks. It's just the feeling that my mum is looking over my shoulder all the time, I've already had her say to me "don't forget to pack the pictures on your walls or the food in the fridge" and it was a real grit-your-teeth moment. I appreciate the concern but... I dunno, I guess I just want to look after myself.
Chaos is the natural state of the universe
Some days I'm the pigeon, some days I'm the statue.
honourary militant margerine ninJAH
If it wasn't for displacement activity I wouldn't get half as much done
SILVER Member
fluffy mess
197 posts
Location: Brighton, United Kingdom
fluffy mess
197 posts
Location: Brighton, United Kingdom
Posted:
KIck back and embrace the fact that your mum is probably going to annoyingly make your life a little easier for you for a while
It's just because she loves you. If you're feeling this negatively towards it now, you are dooming yourself. Accept it and go with it, it'll make things a hell of a lot easier for you than if you try to fight it.
I'm willing to bet it probably wont be as bad as you expect it to.
I'm contemplating going and living with my parents (well my entire family) in the family home in South Africa again in a few years, and I am a little worried about falling back under the wing. The main reason I'm moving back is to be near them. I think you just need to establish that, yes, you are under their roof, but no you arn't a child anymore. Now I just have to practice what I preach, but not for a good few years yet.
KIck back and embrace the fact that your mum is probably going to annoyingly make your life a little easier for you for a while
It's just because she loves you. If you're feeling this negatively towards it now, you are dooming yourself. Accept it and go with it, it'll make things a hell of a lot easier for you than if you try to fight it.I'm willing to bet it probably wont be as bad as you expect it to.
I'm contemplating going and living with my parents (well my entire family) in the family home in South Africa again in a few years, and I am a little worried about falling back under the wing. The main reason I'm moving back is to be near them. I think you just need to establish that, yes, you are under their roof, but no you arn't a child anymore. Now I just have to practice what I preach, but not for a good few years yet.
"I want to know if you can see beauty even when it's not pretty, every day,and if you can source your own life from its presence.." - Oriah Mountain Dreamer
GOLD Member
Introverted
833 posts
Location: Norf London, United Kingdom
Introverted
833 posts
Location: Norf London, United Kingdom
Posted:
I still have those grit-your-teeth moments, but that's what mums do!
Most of my time gets spent either out doing stuff, or in my room, and my parents let me get on with it.
Still, it will be nice when do get my own place again. Would need someone to share with ideally. And a new job.
I still have those grit-your-teeth moments, but that's what mums do!
Most of my time gets spent either out doing stuff, or in my room, and my parents let me get on with it.
Still, it will be nice when do get my own place again. Would need someone to share with ideally. And a new job.
My Mind is a Ship
Emotions become the Waves
Soul is the Ocean
If a quizz is quizzical, what is a test?
SILVER Member
My flabber is gasted
737 posts
Location: waaaay south of heaven, United Kingdom
My flabber is gasted
737 posts
Location: waaaay south of heaven, United Kingdom
Posted:
Blu's probably right here, I doubt it'll be quite as bad as I'm expecting (I'm a worst-case scenario specialist ). I'll still be doing all my own shopping and cooking so hopefully I'll be treated more as a lodger rather than the returning son. There's just a whole lot of pride in the way, especially as when I first moved out most people expected me to fall on my arse and come back very quickly.
That pretty much nails it. As long as that happens we should be ok!
Blu's probably right here, I doubt it'll be quite as bad as I'm expecting (I'm a worst-case scenario specialist
). I'll still be doing all my own shopping and cooking so hopefully I'll be treated more as a lodger rather than the returning son. There's just a whole lot of pride in the way, especially as when I first moved out most people expected me to fall on my arse and come back very quickly.Written by:
I think you just need to establish that, yes, you are under their roof, but no you arn't a child anymore.
That pretty much nails it. As long as that happens we should be ok!
Chaos is the natural state of the universe
Some days I'm the pigeon, some days I'm the statue.
honourary militant margerine ninJAH
If it wasn't for displacement activity I wouldn't get half as much done
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