s-p-l-a-tmember
383 posts
Location: Brisbane, Qld, Australia


Posted:
A really good mate of mine came to me with a problem, and in the past I've experienced stuff like this too, however briefly..

He's started going out with a girl (its been about 4 months) but all her friends talk about is her ex boyfriend..

They were going out for almost 3 years, so I guess its understandable.. but its driving him crazy... doesn't wanna hear about it or know about it. He really digs this chicky, and she rarely mentions her ex.. its just that when they're out and about together its always a topic of conversation..

It's been going on for about 7-8 months now.. so he's kinda sick of it...

My question is though... is this normal?!?!? I've never heard about it this extent before... he's thought about leaving her, but they dig each other heaps...

Anyone else gotten this?

Just a gentle rant for my rambling raucous rebounding brain...

The beautiful thing about learning is that no one can take it away from you.- B.B.King


winkBRONZE Member
member
18 posts
Location: Livermore, CA, USA


Posted:
wether or not she is over her ex is what's important, and it sounds like she is. if they dig each other that much why can't he just ask her to bring it up to her friends. probably the only thing i ever learned about relationships that mattered is that comunication isnot just the key it's the door too.

RoziSILVER Member
100 characters max...
2,996 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia


Posted:
Maybe raise it with the gf. Not in a full on way, but just like "have you noticed that your friends seem to talk about ______ a lot, or is it just me being paranoid? It makes me a bit uncomfortable".

She may be able to steer the conversation away from the subject, if they continually raise it.

It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.

What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...


Bender_the_OffenderGOLD Member
still can't believe it's not butter
6,978 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia


Posted:
everyone has a different policy with mentioning ex's. if it's of any help, I usually diffuse the air of uncertainty by joking that 'I allow you to have a past!'

a commitment.... maybe if your friends married, then there would be less doubt
::nervous laughter::

Laugh Often, Smile Much, Post lolcats Always


master sodiummember
536 posts
Location: carson city, nevada


Posted:
I dunno, I kinda feel that people getting uncomfortable aboot someone talking aboot an ex can stem from their own insecurity (I'm not trying to say anything bad aboot your friend, this has just been my experience). my girlfriend mentions her various ex's a decent amount, but I'm not concerned because I know she loves me and doesn't want to be with them. like bender said "I allow you to have a past.

you can't have a war against terrorism because war IS terrorism.it's not about worshipping fire. its about making the fire want to worship you.


s-p-l-a-tmember
383 posts
Location: Brisbane, Qld, Australia


Posted:
cool *thnx* guys....!

the poor bastard had a bad time over 4 years (2 long term relationships, both actually ended up ending by the chicky cheating on him with her ex... (two different girls, same situation, twice!)

*sighs with muchness*

Anyone out there know a rich sushi chef ? I plan on marrying one, one day...

The beautiful thing about learning is that no one can take it away from you.- B.B.King


Bender_the_OffenderGOLD Member
still can't believe it's not butter
6,978 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia


Posted:
if luck is on his side, perhaps his next squeeze won't have an ex, so he won't cop the hat-trick.
touch wood eh?
(certain parents groups have an injuction prohibiting me from touching wood oh pooh!)

Laugh Often, Smile Much, Post lolcats Always


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