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Pele
Pele

the henna lady
Location: WNY, USA
Member Since: 15th Dec 2000
Total posts: 6193
Posted:What are your fears and how do you face them?

Scorpions. They are about the only animal I don't care for.

Microphones/Stages. I tend to freeze when behind the mic and get nervously ill before I hit the stage.

Failure. I think that is a given.

I tend to get squeemish, shy, ill from nerves and then I take a deep breath, face the fear head on and do what I have to do. Lately though I think I am more on the shy and denying that I have to do stuff side of things.


Pele
Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir
"Oooh look! A pub!" -exclaimed after recovering from a stupid fall
"And for the decadence of art, nothing beats a roaring fire." -TMK

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Ender
member

Member Since: 17th Jun 2002
Total posts: 68
Posted:spiders: dunno what to do =\

i used to fear lots of other things too, like speeches and rollercoasters, but that all changed 1 day. We were on a field trip on the last day of school to a theme park

i decided to ride every ride there. how i did it was that I got in line and once on the ride, i told myself i was there, there was nothing i could to do get off, so enjoy it

so yeah, i sorta throw myself at things i fear so fast that even if i wanted to, i couldn't get outa it

except spiders
ahhhh


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Victoria
member
Location: Ontario, Canada
Member Since: 26th Aug 2002
Total posts: 29
Posted:Ya I used to be afraid of spiders too
I think it was mainly because of one of my friends
One day I just asked myself why I was a fraid of spiders, and I couldn't think of a good reason....they can't really harm you (well at least not the ones that live in canada) plus I'm like a million times bigger than a spider, so why should I be the one that's afraid. I guess I just talked myself out of that fear.

I also have a mild fear of speed and heights....but it doesn't really bother me that much anymore, I just go and do stuff from high places and go really fast.....I think I'm almost over those fears as well .


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TheBovrilMonkey
TheBovrilMonkey

Liquid Cow
Location: High Wycombe, England
Member Since: 3rd Sep 2001
Total posts: 2629
Posted:I have a real problem with syringes - the thought of having an injection just makes me cringe. I've put off going to the doctor for ages before because I know I'll need something shot into my arm.
I decided a while ago that it was really not a good thing to be scared of so signed up to give blood at Uni, hoping I'd get over it if I forced myself to go for a big one.
I went through with it - I was so psyched up that my heart rate was through the roof while the blood was being taken, I gave a pint almost twice as fast as anyone the nurses had seen.
Unfortunately, it's not helped, I might try again when there's a blood drive here though.


But there's no sense crying over every mistake. You just keep on trying till you run out of cake.

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FireMikeZ
FireMikeZ

Laguna dude
Location: Laguna, California, US
Member Since: 24th Jul 2002
Total posts: 1438
Posted:Pele, stage fright???? (* big affectionate grin *)

good thread. no pyrophobes, huh?

fears mainly of not moving myself into fertile situations, of not daring enough, of underexperiencing this moment and larger swathes of life & spirit, of not fulfilling my potential with the potential of you all this lifetime.

the flipside of fear, for me, is the opportunity, thrill, & satisfaction of courage, which i cultivate in myself, though (* i fear! *) not as dedicatedly as so many whose spark, will, & art i admire.

i've only snowski'd 2 or 3 times, each i've peaked at going down a portion of a single black diamond slope, while totally amateur & prolly truly below average natural skill, gritted teeth and did it in order TO advance through fear in general, a training & a rush too.

used to, though strong enough most of the time now not to use this method, use a mantra borrowed out of the Dune series of all things, fictional Bene Gesserit (thinly-disguised female cleric version of Jesuits) mothers' wrote a mantra they taught us, something like:

i face my fear
i let my fear pass over and under me
and past me
my fear is gone

found the original, in finer language, powerful.

[note: little difference for me between any composer, of attitudes, societies, words, visions, sounds, feelings, working at an inspired peak, and what any spiritual or human spirit source finds and shares with us, canonized philsophy/ religion/ psychology or not. so props to what's his name, the Dune author for this one.]

[ 23 September 2002, 10:07: Message edited by: FireMike ]


molten cheers,

~ FireMike

FireMikeZ@yahoo.com (personal messages welcome, no promo spam, please!)
Laguna, California, US

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FireMikeZ
FireMikeZ

Laguna dude
Location: Laguna, California, US
Member Since: 24th Jul 2002
Total posts: 1438
Posted:btw, Lynne, please check your e-mail? thanx!

~ Mike, always devoted to lava's generatrix


molten cheers,

~ FireMike

FireMikeZ@yahoo.com (personal messages welcome, no promo spam, please!)
Laguna, California, US

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Rozi
100 characters max...
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Member Since: 11th Jan 2002
Total posts: 2996
Posted:Longstanding fear of public embarassment, stemming from being an introvert. I hate to appear "silly".

The only way of dealing with it? Gradually narrow your idea of what "silly" is. Saying the wrong thing in public? Tripping over your own feet? Playing with dolls? That's not silly, its fun!!!


It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.

What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...

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FireMikeZ
FireMikeZ

Laguna dude
Location: Laguna, California, US
Member Since: 24th Jul 2002
Total posts: 1438
Posted:or embrace it straight out and honestly, enjoy being silly.

personally, i've long stopped being afraid of labels, which is a common fear, seems, while being pretty darn conscious of the power of labels in all directions, and always with a pattern of many effects on many people & contexts. so gimme as many as you like, can even enjoy "collecting" more, living fuller. . . and they are always oversimplifications, labels, while sometimes valuably or revealingly capturing some emphasis. . . [added Sunday Sept 22, 2002:] and next moment, let alone tomorrow, or the next time you see me, i'll be a different complex of what you can label.

people fear being pigeon-holed and stereotyped. radically, i believe you can change even major elements of however you get typed, major parts of who you are, for example how a personality test captures you, although most of those are based on strict theories that they capture life-long attributes you can develop and manage but not change or replace. but sometimes, maybe with a lot of effort and transformation, you can. major change IS rare, unless you are pushed from outside to do a major restructuring, what i call "getting hit by a truck. . .and living," both steps being key. changing or switching "medium"-size parts of you, or adding new ones, is getting more common, though it's often a huge struggle and accomplishment. buddha meant it when he went around, in a previous life as a monk on earth, telling everyone you too will become a buddha, within 10,000 lifetimes. what most didn't get was that he literally meant it may take some 10,000 whole lifetimes.

but so, would you relax your fear of labels, of what people think (you may surprise them and yourself into a positive appreciation of whatcha got), of what, who, & how you are, feel, act, and relate? then. . .


what's RIGHT with silly? be it's champion if it's a gift of yours, Rozi! that's coming out & leading the rest of us from beyond the fear of silliness. teach me, make me grin, get me into it so i can share your special talent in the glorious expanse of our exploring what we can be! or jus chill it wit me, dogg.

[ 23 September 2002, 10:05: Message edited by: FireMike ]


molten cheers,

~ FireMike

FireMikeZ@yahoo.com (personal messages welcome, no promo spam, please!)
Laguna, California, US

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Rozi
100 characters max...
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Member Since: 11th Jan 2002
Total posts: 2996
Posted:It is amazing how tough it is to be silly. I am generally serious, quite often cynical, but allowing myself to be silly is tough. It takes a naivety that we tend to not allow ourselves these days. If we do do silly things, it tends to be a bit of an act, the "look at me, I am being silly". So maybe I am heading in the wrong direction by narrowing my definition of silly, maybe I should make it wider. Being serious is silly, being cynical is silly. That way I can be silly every day!!!

How many people can honestly say that they don't just play the fool, they are the fool, & that is okay?


It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.

What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...

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FireMikeZ
FireMikeZ

Laguna dude
Location: Laguna, California, US
Member Since: 24th Jul 2002
Total posts: 1438
Posted:wonderful, Rozi!

& while out of good graces in my timing now, i am still the master apprentice to Brother Blue/ Dr. Hugh Morgan Hill, Official Storyteller of the City of Boston. Brother Blue tells me all the time, tells everyone & records it across our little earthball, "be the fool." finger snap-snap, snap-snap, pa-pop-po "be the fool, the fool's in you, you are the sacred fool, God's fool, the storyteller, like Shakespeare, Ghandi, all those people, it's true. . ." snap-snap "in the middle of the middle of the middle of you. . . sacred fool. . .just be a fool. like Blue."

~ Mike (Brother Heartfire)


molten cheers,

~ FireMike

FireMikeZ@yahoo.com (personal messages welcome, no promo spam, please!)
Laguna, California, US

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SickpuPpy
SickpuPpy

Ninja Rockstar!
Location: Denver, Co. U.S.A.
Member Since: 27th Nov 2001
Total posts: 1100
Posted:Doctors, clowns, needles, and dentist drills.

The last time I had to get stitches it took six people to hold me down while the doctor did it. Good thing she wasn't dressed like a clown or no one would have made it out alive.


Jesus helps me trick people.

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Doc Lightning
Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
Member Since: 28th May 2001
Total posts: 13920
Posted:Spiders and other icky bugs (roaches, centipedes, anything hairy that's not a mammal, etc.)

-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

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Raymund Phule (Fireproof)
Raymund Phule (Fireproof)

Enter a "Title" here:
Location: San Diego California
Member Since: 31st Dec 2001
Total posts: 2905
Posted:Are there really that many scorpians in New York, Pele?

I would like to say I am fearless, I'm not unfortunatly. There is only one thing I fear above all else. I think I'll keep it to myself for now.


Some Jarhead last night: "this dumb a$$ thinks hes fireproof"

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Doc Lightning
Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
Member Since: 28th May 2001
Total posts: 13920
Posted:quote:Originally posted by SickpuPpy:
Doctors, clowns, needles, and dentist drills.

The last time I had to get stitches it took six people to hold me down while the doctor did it. Good thing she wasn't dressed like a clown or no one would have made it out alive. Right...so that whole idea of greeting a patient wearing a clown nose and clown shoes, holding a needle in one hand, and a dentist drill in the other might not go over so well?

**note to self: don't do that.**



-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

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Jade Lynx
member
Location: Laguna Beach, but i live in De...
Member Since: 19th May 2002
Total posts: 239
Posted:A wasted life...

Being in a space so enclosed that i can't move my arms or legs, or can't turn around or whatnot. Old boyfriend many years ago pinned me to the bed in the midst of an almost fight. I threw all 6' 3", 190 lb of him bodily across the room.

Not getting to all the places/states of being that i'd like to...

Really huge bugs.

Leaving the world not having made a positive difference in it (see item 1)...


We got the MikeZ in the house, woot!Glue the ham, hat baby!

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Flynt
Flynt

Intrepid Penguin

Member Since: 12th May 2002
Total posts: 5635
Posted:Everything!

You name it, im scared of it `

Cept for
1: needles, had too many to care anymore
2: walking alone in the city at night, dunno why, it just doesnt frighten me..... perhaps if i was in another city?


Currently on the right side up of the world.

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Ender
member

Member Since: 17th Jun 2002
Total posts: 68
Posted:oh yeah. needles for me too =(

and being buried alive and those sort of things.


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Prometheus
Prometheus

Diamond In The Rough
Location: Richmond, Virginia
Member Since: 30th Jun 2002
Total posts: 459
Posted:I have only 3 fears:

I fear not being in control. At times my subconscious is strong enough to overtake me and I end up doing things I have no control over. e.g. I sleepwalk. I eat, drive, clean, etc. You name it, I've done it while unconscious. I'm always fearful I might hurt someone and not realize it until the next morning.

I fear being alone. I live in constant fear that I'll be one of those people who grow old and lonely surrounded by cats, talking to their shoes & such.

I fear death. Not so much the idea of dying, transistions don't bug me. It's the idea of not existing, not being aware, not being anything. I really do wanna live forever.

That's all I have to say about that...


Dance like it hurts; Love like you need money; Work like someone is watching.

Never criticize someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes. That way, when you DO criticize them, you are a mile away, and you have their shoes.

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SmallBoy - x
SmallBoy - x

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: London
Member Since: 29th May 2002
Total posts: 2737
Posted:I don't like:-
a) heights, so i go climbing (Adrenaline being the wonderful thing that it is...)

b) injections in my mouth, so I don't have anaesthetic at the dentist (freaks my dentist out royally - lol)

c) Spiders, so i leave the house and wait for my flatmate to come home -

Simple........


Small Lardy Person In Disguise

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Magnus
member
Location: Bath, UK
Member Since: 5th Sep 2002
Total posts: 279
Posted:Only the darkness within myself.

Magnus... pay it forward

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UCOF
UCOF

Carpal \'Tunnel

Member Since: 17th Apr 2002
Total posts: 15414
Posted:snakes,
syringes and injections...i cant even look at them on the telly,
walking down dark alleys...cos i think someone is going to jump out at me
Loosing my smoking jacket...without it..i am nothing
Being up in front of a grounp of people...cos i think im gonna trip over and look a twat!

i just generally find that the best way to do something is to do it slowly, building up your confidence ie..ive gone this far...go further

I got over my fear of hights for example by walking over the glass floor in the CN tower in toronto....loved it! totally...


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Trippie Hippie
Trippie Hippie

old hand
Location: Bewildered state of nothingnes...
Member Since: 18th May 2002
Total posts: 733
Posted:Quite simply

-Spiders
-Public speaking
-Morris dancers
All scare the hell out of me!!!!!!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Last night i met some pixies and we danced around a stone.



Trippie Hippie- Monty Dons secret love child

Fly like a mouse, run like a pillow, be the small book case.

"Last night i met some pixies and we danced around a stone".

Because dressing up is fun.

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Pele
Pele

the henna lady
Location: WNY, USA
Member Since: 15th Dec 2000
Total posts: 6193
Posted:Ray, when you work in a pet store, there are scorpions in NY! Yuck!

Prometheus and his night antics are really funny! I have a shyte-load of stories about that which I will share sometime!

I found that since my stay in the hospital I am more nervous about being in cars, even though my accident had nothing to do with any vehicles. I think it is just the idea of going back to the hospital that is thwarting!

And laugh it up all you will FireMike, most people I know think my stage fright is funny!

Thanks for the answers. I am really enjoying this thread!


Pele
Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir
"Oooh look! A pub!" -exclaimed after recovering from a stupid fall
"And for the decadence of art, nothing beats a roaring fire." -TMK

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NYC
NYC

NYC
Location: NYC, NY, USA
Member Since: 26th Aug 2001
Total posts: 9232
Posted:It's not so much a fear, but an irrational discomfort:

I really hate when someone ELSE is making a fool of themselves.

Strange, because I don't really have stage fright or performance anxiety. For example, I really find it hard to watch BAD improv comedy. At my university bad improv comics would occationally perform at coffee shops and I found it irrationally hard to watch. I, as an audience member, really wanted to crawl under a rock. Or when a show goes bad, I feel badly for the performer.

If someone's going to look like an idiot, I'd actually rather it be me up there then have to watch someone else die a horrible stage death. Maybe because I know I can take it without being traumatized, or maybe I know when to quit or what I'd do to make the situation better...


Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]

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Pele'sWhippingBoy
member
Location: Rochester, NY, USA
Member Since: 19th Jun 2001
Total posts: 442
Posted:Prom's sleep walking. That reminds me, next time you visit "My dishes need cleaning, my dishes need cleaning..." (I think I'll put that on a CD when he sleeps. )

Fear? I'm afraid of those big, hair, leggy, centipedes in my apartment. They run real fast too. I've squished a bunch of them.

I have a fear of heights. Which is odd since I'd love to fly like Superman.

Every other week I'm afraid of my dishes so I have to really fight that one. After sitting that long they tend to get fuzzy.


FYI: I am not Pele. If you wish to reply to me and use a short version of my name, use: PWB.

English? Who needs that? I'm never going to England. - Homer Jay Simpson

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Ender
member

Member Since: 17th Jun 2002
Total posts: 68
Posted:quote:I fear death. Not so much the idea of dying, transistions don't bug me. It's the idea of not existing, not being aware, not being anything. I really do wanna live forever.
caused me many sleepless nights

quote:b) injections in my mouth, so I don't have anaesthetic at the dentist (freaks my dentist out royally - lol)
i had to get 4 teeth out for my braces to work. 7 needles full slowly injected. i hate needles too! THANK GOD I BROUGHT 2 little stress balls in my pockets or i may seriously have ripped some flesh from my arm or something.

on a similar note, i got my braces off a few days ago. MY TEETH FEEL SO SMOOTH NOW.

quote:If someone's going to look like an idiot, I'd actually rather it be me up there then have to watch someone else die a horrible stage death. Maybe because I know I can take it without being traumatized, or maybe I know when to quit or what I'd do to make the situation better... ur a very nice guy


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Flynt
Flynt

Intrepid Penguin

Member Since: 12th May 2002
Total posts: 5635
Posted:NYC im with you on that one. i cant even watch movies with ppl doing that because i sit there an cringe the whole way through...

Major Fears, since last time i just said i was scared of everything:

People. Meeting them, not living up to expectations, being hurt by them, or just laffed at.
Getting old, being alone.... like most ppl
Doctors, hospitals,..... everytime i go to one they find something wrong with me... that i didnt go there to see them for!


Currently on the right side up of the world.

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adren@line
member
Location: Hobart, Tasmania, Australia
Member Since: 28th Mar 2002
Total posts: 249
Posted:this is a nice post, its good how everyone can get out there and discuss personal stuff without being... analysed. which brings me to my fear, not being accepted.

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UCOF
UCOF

Carpal \'Tunnel

Member Since: 17th Apr 2002
Total posts: 15414
Posted:Lucky you...i had 4 injections and 6 teeth pulled out...best thing was i got a tenner (10) outa my folks........whcih was nice

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Pele
Pele

the henna lady
Location: WNY, USA
Member Since: 15th Dec 2000
Total posts: 6193
Posted:I went into a pet store tonite and was drawn to looking at the scorpion, and I realise how many of us are attracted our fears. For example, I know someone who is afraid of heights but will lay on the edge of a cliff and look over, because it's exhilarating. My friend is terrified of my snake, but loves to talk to her when she is in her tank.

How many of you find a facination with your fear?
(And yes, I understand it is all about facing the fear, I just think the automatic attraction is interesting.)

[ 25 September 2002, 13:24: Message edited by: Pele ]


Pele
Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir
"Oooh look! A pub!" -exclaimed after recovering from a stupid fall
"And for the decadence of art, nothing beats a roaring fire." -TMK

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Flynt
Flynt

Intrepid Penguin

Member Since: 12th May 2002
Total posts: 5635
Posted:i totally can identify with that Pele!

Im afraid of heights so i went skydiving
im afraid of frogs, so i pick them up
im really afraid of big dogs, but i pretend that im not so they cant smell my fear..

i have lots of things that im afraid of and while im not looking forward to dealing with them, i know that when the time comes, i will handle it the best way possible!

btw, this is a great thread Pele, thankyou


Currently on the right side up of the world.

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Page: 12

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