• All Purchases made this month instantly go into the draw to win a USD $ 100.00 credit to your HoP account.
 

Cassandra


Cassandra

Froggie ... Ribbit !!!
Location: Back in Paris... for now !

Total posts: 4224
Posted:Among the numerous words I learnt taking part in this BB, I found "PDA" to be quite intriguing and interesting.A short while ago I had lunch with two friends and the girl kept kissing her boyfriend (I mean REALLY French kissing) interrupting him in the middle of his sentences. I honestly found that to be really rude... On the other hand I am a very tender person to the few people I really feel close to and dont mind PDA (I mean "reasonnable" and polite PDA). I even find sometimes people asking you not to hold their hands in public or just to avoid any PDA to be also an insult (is he / she ashamed of me ?)Isn't there such thing as good / bad PDA ?where's the line in your opinion ?Shine oncassandra[This message has been edited by cassandra (edited 19 December 2001).]

"I want brown bread... no, that is diesel oil..."
"So I was raised in Europe, where History comes from ..."
"NON !!! La Plume de mon oncle n est pas Bingibangibungi !!!"

Delete Topic

Dom
BRONZE Member since Dec 2001

Dom

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Bristol, UK

Total posts: 3009
Posted:PDA = Public Display of Affection.I suspect you're going to get a lot of varied answers to this, but that most people who actively contribute here are more open about their feelings and so don't object too strongly to PDAs.I think that if you are in a group, or talking to someone, then it's rude to not pay attention to the person you're speaking to. Paying massive physical attention to your boy/girlfriend is a sure way of showing you're not really part of the other conversation.Also sitting in a crowded bar, restaurant, train, etc. with the couple next to you noisily eating each other is very off putting and rude! I feel like shouting 'Get a room!' And I get jealous! I get more easily annoyed when I'm single
Non-Https Image Link
On the other hand. I know men who will not hold their girlfriend's hands in public and shy away from displays of affection, even in private. I think this is a great pity as it is lovely to be hand-in-hand or arm-in-arm with a partner or friend. Years ago a girlfriend told me she loved the way I used to walk arm in arm with her as her previous boyfriends hadn't even held her hand! Only when I asked a few of my male friends did some say they did not hold hands in public much! Until this I thought I was one of the more non-touchy people.So I think that a comfortable level of PDA between friends and lovers is excellent. In private and public it shows that you care about each other, and when with my girlfriend I generally want the world to know how happy I am with such a wonderful person. It should make other people happy (not embarrassed) to see strangers and friends happy.Dom(was Alternativa)


Delete

Superman
BRONZE Member since Mar 2001

Superman

member
Location: Houston, Texas

Total posts: 829
Posted:Im all for getting naked in the bushes..hee heeI dont mind people being affectionate in public, but some people take it a little too far. Hugging kissing and cuddling is no big deal.The way i see it, i wouldnt do anythig with my wife in public that would make her look like a slut. Super'Cassandra...i thought French people were all for whoppe in public places..
Non-Https Image Link


Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear--not absence of fear.


- Mark Twain

Delete

Pele
BRONZE Member since Dec 2000

Pele

the henna lady
Location: WNY, USA

Total posts: 6193
Posted:I think there is a time and a place for everything. PDA is no exception.I think naughty little escapades *can* be fun in psuedo-privacy ..ie in a car where you might get caught, really dark public places that aren't crowded(no not a theater where kids might sit in the seat, but a dark corner of a club perhaps). That can be fun and adrenalizing, plus I think it keeps the excitement rolling between two people as long as it isn't an all the time thing.I am *not* for someone giving a suction induced tonsilectamy at a restaraunt or such public places, especially when children are around. That is sheerly in appropriate, disrespectful and rude imho. PWB also had a friend, Cassandra, who used to do the same thing to his wife as your friend. Whenever she was talking to me, or anyone really, he would cut in between us and kiss her, hug her, interrupt nearly every 10 minutes it seemed and it was just plain irritating.What bugs me are the guys who are too macho to say "I Love You" or give slight PDA's in front of anyone when they are all sweetness and sunshine when alone together. It does make me feel as if he is ashamed of me.I love holding hands, cuddling up, quick kisses, sliding my hand into his back pocket as we are walking along, and I have even been known to steal a quick butt pinch in the grocery line when no one is looking, but I wouldn't take it further than that in public. Oh and I love winks! Guys if you are at a party or a club or something and want her to know you are thinking of her from across the room, wink and smile or do some such small thing. That kind of thing really goes a long way in the romance department with most women! (we also use the sign language symbol for I Love You, not only between my man but also with my son, it's like a "secret" code that makes us all feel pretty good).------------------Pele Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir...http://www.pyromorph.com

Pele
Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir
"Oooh look! A pub!" -exclaimed after recovering from a stupid fall
"And for the decadence of art, nothing beats a roaring fire." -TMK

Delete

Charles
BRONZE Member since Jun 2001

Charles

Corporate Circus Arts Entertainer
Location: Auckland

Total posts: 3989
Posted:This obviously varies between people, but I think a good base to start is that if you do something that a parent can do to a child in public, then thats ok.So things like cuddling, holding hands, a peck on the cheek or even a quick kiss are all ok for parent/child Da'sIf people complain about those when a couple are doing it, but wouldn't complain if a mother and toddler were doing it, I think it shows that they are objecting for reasons other than moral views.But long french kisses, necking, pashing and other things, which would not happen between a parent/child are obviously sexual (not just affectionate) in nature and should be treated as possibly offensive to other members of the public. IMHOMe, I'm deeply in love at the moment, and am probably guilty of PDL (Public Displays of Lust) a lot more than PDA. But if someone tells me off, it's my fault (possibly hers too) coz I know that it may be offensive to others...
Non-Https Image Link

Non-Https Image Link

Non-Https Image Link

Non-Https Image Link
------------------Charles (INFERNO)newdolbel@hotmail.comhttp://juggling.co.nz


HoP Posting Guidelines
* Is it the Truth?
* Is it Fair to all concerned?
* Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
* Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?

Delete

NYC


NYC

NYC
Location: NYC, NY, USA

Total posts: 9232
Posted:(Long deep tounge kiss)... oh, my bad... didn't see you all here... er...Actually, working in a school kinda artificially shuts down my sexuality for 8 hours a day which makes me a bit more sensitive to such acts. It also takes me longer to "switch gears"... Something is to be said for the romance of the moment certainly... but something is also to be said for the "gee, this would be much more fun at home on the couch/bed with candles and a nice blanket" factor...As for holding hands, I admit, I love it on romantic strolls in the country but in New York City I get claustrophobic on busy streets holding hands... It annoyed the heck out of my ex.As for excessive PDA, I just think its so much more intimate to be passionate when your alone. You certainly want to show that you love someone, but you can do that with a small kiss, smile, squeeze, hug or snuggle... Anything involving the tounge should be done in private.
Non-Https Image Link


Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]

Delete

SickpuPpy


SickpuPpy

Ninja Rockstar!
Location: Denver, Co. U.S.A.

Total posts: 1100
Posted:I think that there are many differnt levels of affectionate display. I've never been one for trying to swallow my girlfreinds face in a crowded coffee house, but I may have my arm around her the whole time. It's just good kung fu to pay your girlfriend some sort of phisical affection when your attention is elsewhere. I think mostly what it comes down to is noticing when other people's PDA's bother you and then making a point not to do those your self. I know a lot of people who are quck to point the finger, but are just as guilty (if not more) then everyone else. These peoples PDA bothers me the most.Lot's of people, myself included, enjoy the thrill of semi-public sexual encounters. It's all good fun, but really discreation should be used.Let us not forget the old saying:"This is a family establishment, not a place to establish a family"Cheers------------------If you love something, set it on fire.

Jesus helps me trick people.

Delete

Cassandra


Cassandra

Froggie ... Ribbit !!!
Location: Back in Paris... for now !

Total posts: 4224
Posted:Dom (why no longer Alternativa , sweety ? ... ooops, sorry PDA... my bad
Non-Https Image Link
)I think you sum it up quite well. And I do see a difference between being envious of other people's happiness and finding some PDA sincerely inappropriate. Sometimes the line's thin and you do hide behind one to not see the other though...Superman, NO, french women are not all about "voulez-vous coucher avec moi" let's do it right here right now... Damn heavy prejudices on our poor French women's back
Non-Https Image Link
And coming from YOU it feels like a stab in the back (LOL... does that make you feel guilty ? ...
Non-Https Image Link
thought so !!!!)Pele, that is exactly it, I really feel bad when my man is completely opposite in public and in private. There is a time and a place and a mood for everything, but when the difference is huge and when it is constantly that way, It's "goodbye" for me ...charles, I can only wish you one thing, to feel this urge for PDA, PDL and PD+any letter for ever. I think one of the most beautiful image I have is an 80 year old couple holding hands in teh streets and looking at eachother with that same sparkle in their eyes. That's all I wish you and your princess
Non-Https Image Link
There is one thing also in PDA, it is that there is a difference between people who intentionnally do something to have witnesses of their love, draw attention or anything (like that girl sticking her tongue in her friend's throat while we were chatting) and others that are just so in love that they may not notice the world around. Still need to keep limits but there is a difference IMHO.Shine onSnuggle on
Non-Https Image Link
Casandra


"I want brown bread... no, that is diesel oil..."
"So I was raised in Europe, where History comes from ..."
"NON !!! La Plume de mon oncle n est pas Bingibangibungi !!!"

Delete

Gruff


member
Location: Gloucester

Total posts: 106
Posted:I think PDA is great, although there is a time and a place for everything as Pele said.I like to hold hands, give little pecks, walk arm in arm etc... but liposuction is OFF the list!! I dont like seeing other people doing it so why should I let others suffer? Im not prude but a full-on face-munch is something that can be quite offensive in public places.PDA is Public Display of Affection - and that is just what a peck, holding hands, walking arm in arm is.Face-munching is more like a PDP - Public Display of Passion - a totally different concept altogether.What I like is that my parents still activly use PDP even though theyre fast approaching retirement. I used to think it was embarassing but now Im older and im in a good healthy relationship myself, I appreciate that it means that they do love each other very much and are not afraid to let others know e.g. they always walk through town holding hands and always dance together at a disco etc.It is also good in todays social climate for PDA's to happen - so many broken, unhappy homes, so many unloved people who need to see PDAs.For me, a PDA is a good sign that you have a good healthy relationship on your hands, if youre not comfortable with your other half in public then are you comfortable with them at all?I hope I havent offended anyone but its a very 'emotive' topic and I wanted to share my thoughts.Gruff

Delete

Superman
BRONZE Member since Mar 2001

Superman

member
Location: Houston, Texas

Total posts: 829
Posted:guilt and women have something in common....they are beneath me.
Non-Https Image Link

Non-Https Image Link
you know i would never insult my little french frog..hugsi keep my public affection to a minimum for the sake of my wifes reputation.Super'


Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear--not absence of fear.


- Mark Twain

Delete

Neph23
BRONZE Member since Nov 2001

member
Location: Denver, Colorado, USA

Total posts: 62
Posted:quote:Also sitting in a crowded bar, restaurant, train, etc. with the couple next to you noisily eating each other is very off putting and rude! I feel like shouting 'Get a room!' And I get jealous! I get more easily annoyed when I'm single this topic was brought to my attention this evening while i was at work. i work in a bar.. one of the other wait staff was there as a costumer with her boyfriend and i swear they were trying to swallow each other.. I found it very uncomfortable to approach them and get their drink order. I dont mind the little affectionate stuff, little kisses, cuddling, holding hands ect. But if you find parts of you swelling its time to get a room.....

Delete

Posted:Well - I think somewhat differently on this topic <"Typical" mutters NYC
Non-Https Image Link
>.I think you should do what you want, as long as you arent 'hurting' other people around you. If you feel like kissing for 10 minutes in the car while dropping your partner off for work - go for it. If some (usually old) person gets shitty with you, stuff em.On the other hand if someone is constantly interupted while talking to you to kiss their partner, well that is rude - they obviously are more interested in PDA than they are in talking to you, so you might as well go elsewhere.I think that society is too uptight - does it really matter if two adults in an adult setting decide to get jiggy? I certainly wouldnt be offended - if I was made uncomfortable by it, then I'd divert my attention. People who get it on in public do it *because* its public...for the thrill I guess, and what harm does it actually do?On the other hand - I think children need to be introduced to sex slowly (not 'hey Mum, whats that man doing to that woman? over there on the park bench?') and so some family situations IMHO arent appropriate.It seems a bit hypocritical to show kids movies of animals having sex and not show em how humans do it... LOL (mmm I remmember a scene in a Monty Python movie
Non-Https Image Link
)I'm going to get in trouble for this one
Non-Https Image Link
Josh


Delete

fluffy napalm fairy


fluffy napalm fairy

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Brum / Dorset / Fairy Land

Total posts: 3638
Posted:Josh: I think what you've said is, in theory, quite true. Why shouldn't people do what they please as long as it doesn't hurt others. However, I can also say that (as much as I'd like to say it doesn't bother me)I feel uncomfortable when the two people next to me on the tube are really getting physical. In a situation like this it's often v. hard to divert your attention. There is a difference between freedom to act as you please and consideration for those around you, even if those people (me included) may be being a little uptight.Anyway, waiting til you get home increases the excitement and anticipation
Non-Https Image Link
One more thing - sometimes you do just get carried away, and you're not doing it in public simply because it's in public. It can just be a little hard to stop at PDA and not progress to PDP, but stop you should.In a perfect world it wouldn't matter, but this isn't a perfect world and we have to live with that. Even if it is society being too uptight and an 'old' person screaming at you you should respect the fact that you are in a public place and some people are not comfy with what you're doing.
Non-Https Image Link


Geologists do it in the dirt................ spank

Delete


Similar Topics

Using the keywords [pda] we found the following similar topics.
1. Forums > PDA / Pocket PC advice required [5 replies]
2. Forums > PDA... [12 replies]
3. Forums > finished the website [5 replies]

     Show more..