Forums > Social Chat > angry person
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108 posts
Location: Essex
108 posts
Location: Essex
Posted:
This is not fire related and also rather lame, but I would appreciate anyones imput.
I have just discovered that a girl who really really hates me is about to move into out communal housing project. She used to be my friend but now seems to think I am the most anoying person on earth and has been bitching about me rather a lot from all reports .
I have no control over her moving in (me moving out is also not an option) and we still have mutual friends here.
I know I should just be polite and then avoid her as much as possible, but as weak as this sounds I hate the thought of other people hating me, any ideas on how to deal??
This is not fire related and also rather lame, but I would appreciate anyones imput.
I have just discovered that a girl who really really hates me is about to move into out communal housing project. She used to be my friend but now seems to think I am the most anoying person on earth and has been bitching about me rather a lot from all reports .
I have no control over her moving in (me moving out is also not an option) and we still have mutual friends here.
I know I should just be polite and then avoid her as much as possible, but as weak as this sounds I hate the thought of other people hating me, any ideas on how to deal??
I don't like living below the tropic of Capricorn..... and now I seem to be in England...... how did I get here???
DIAMOND Member
The Ministry of Manipulation
2,523 posts
Location: Bristol, United Kingdom
The Ministry of Manipulation
2,523 posts
Location: Bristol, United Kingdom
Posted:
As you asked for advice, see if this works....
(there is a fee, could you go post a piece of advice for me in my "some advice please" thread....
communicate,
In a ludicrously grown up way
Arrange a (private) cup of tea or coffee with her
Talk to her directly, say this, say that your worried. If you're worried and have issues with it, then you can be sure that she is/does also. Then talk it through and work out a way together that you can live together. Just give each other a little slack and a little respect. And the solution isn't to avoid each other and pretend that you don't exist.
It will work a lot better if you. Forget any malice, anger or vengeful thoughts you have. Start anew, and just aim to be able to live together. better for your calm.
You're probably not going to end up friends like you were again, (not without a bit of time and a lot of effort). but being civil and able to live together, will work just fine.
ohhh. and never ever say or think anything bad about her to anyone, whatever happens, whatever she says about you. If people ask, then tell them, "you and she are just have different personalities". people are diffent, its that way of the world, it makes life more fun.
Good luck
Smile and bounce and swing poi
glass
As you asked for advice, see if this works....
(there is a fee, could you go post a piece of advice for me in my "some advice please" thread....
communicate,
In a ludicrously grown up way
Arrange a (private) cup of tea or coffee with her
Talk to her directly, say this, say that your worried. If you're worried and have issues with it, then you can be sure that she is/does also. Then talk it through and work out a way together that you can live together. Just give each other a little slack and a little respect. And the solution isn't to avoid each other and pretend that you don't exist.
It will work a lot better if you. Forget any malice, anger or vengeful thoughts you have. Start anew, and just aim to be able to live together. better for your calm.
You're probably not going to end up friends like you were again, (not without a bit of time and a lot of effort). but being civil and able to live together, will work just fine.
ohhh. and never ever say or think anything bad about her to anyone, whatever happens, whatever she says about you. If people ask, then tell them, "you and she are just have different personalities". people are diffent, its that way of the world, it makes life more fun.
Good luck
Smile and bounce and swing poi
glass
NYC
9,232 posts
Location: NYC, NY, USA
9,232 posts
Location: NYC, NY, USA
Posted:
(it's so crazy... it just might work!)
(it's so crazy... it just might work!)
Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]
member
93 posts
Location: ringwood,nj usa
93 posts
Location: ringwood,nj usa
Posted:
i agree with glass. don't get the other people living there involved don't even worry about them. the situation is between the 2 of you.
the only 2 who can do anything about it is ya'll. if you're 100% honest no one can have a thing against you. not to mention when everythings over you feel that much better and proud of how you handled it. best of luck.
i agree with glass. don't get the other people living there involved don't even worry about them. the situation is between the 2 of you.
the only 2 who can do anything about it is ya'll. if you're 100% honest no one can have a thing against you. not to mention when everythings over you feel that much better and proud of how you handled it. best of luck.
Better to Burn out than Fade out, Baby!
SILVER Member
100 characters max...
2,996 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
100 characters max...
2,996 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Posted:
glass' advice is great, as ever
But do remember, if it doesn't work, you can make a choice about your own behaviour but you cannot be responsible for hers. Choose the way to act that means you will respect yourself.
& take care
glass' advice is great, as ever
But do remember, if it doesn't work, you can make a choice about your own behaviour but you cannot be responsible for hers. Choose the way to act that means you will respect yourself.
& take care
It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.
What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...
GOLD Member
still can't believe it's not butter
6,978 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia
still can't believe it's not butter
6,978 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posted:
if you can, confuse the shit out of her by being nice to her.
inexplicable kindness can be incredibly disarming, if given sincerely.
Karma is inescapable - like a slightly frustrated tax inspector.
Karma always pays back.
always.
if you can, confuse the shit out of her by being nice to her.
inexplicable kindness can be incredibly disarming, if given sincerely.
Karma is inescapable - like a slightly frustrated tax inspector.
Karma always pays back.
always.
Laugh Often, Smile Much, Post lolcats Always
Carpal \'Tunnel
2,737 posts
Location: London
2,737 posts
Location: London
Posted:
Be REALLLLLLLY nice to her, that way (if she carries on pissing you off,) no-one will suspect it was you that pushed her over the balcony lol.
Be REALLLLLLLY nice to her, that way (if she carries on pissing you off,) no-one will suspect it was you that pushed her over the balcony lol.
Small Lardy Person In Disguise
member
184 posts
Location: London
184 posts
Location: London
Posted:
I shared a room with a girl who hated me for several months... she was just one of those bullies who had to pick on someone and decided that I looked ugly or something. In a way it was quite sad. Her own self-esteem relied on her having someone to bully.
I pretty much dealt with it by always being unfailingly polite to her and never bitching about her to anyone else (except my best friend in the house) though, my god, the tempation was hard to resist!
In the end she came round one day when she lost a folder containing 50 odd CDs and I turned the room upside down looking for them (I just thought it was a good opportunity to do a little tidying!) and she was so touched she decided she did like me after all. She soon found someone else uglier than me to pick on, though.
I shared a room with a girl who hated me for several months... she was just one of those bullies who had to pick on someone and decided that I looked ugly or something. In a way it was quite sad. Her own self-esteem relied on her having someone to bully.
I pretty much dealt with it by always being unfailingly polite to her and never bitching about her to anyone else (except my best friend in the house) though, my god, the tempation was hard to resist!
In the end she came round one day when she lost a folder containing 50 odd CDs and I turned the room upside down looking for them (I just thought it was a good opportunity to do a little tidying!) and she was so touched she decided she did like me after all. She soon found someone else uglier than me to pick on, though.
Enter a "Title" here:
2,905 posts
Location: San Diego California
2,905 posts
Location: San Diego California
Posted:
I was going to put a joke on here that I thought was funny but I am sure I would have gotten flack so basically you answered your own question. Just be nice to her, no matter what she does be nice. Always say good morning, gahuntite when she sneezes. Make it so that hse just looks like an ass for being mean to you.
I was going to put a joke on here that I thought was funny but I am sure I would have gotten flack so basically you answered your own question. Just be nice to her, no matter what she does be nice. Always say good morning, gahuntite when she sneezes. Make it so that hse just looks like an ass for being mean to you.
Some Jarhead last night: "this dumb a$$ thinks hes fireproof"
GOLD Member
still can't believe it's not butter
6,978 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia
still can't believe it's not butter
6,978 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posted:
failing that you could always arrange for a necromancer to bind her to you. As friends, the Undead make excellent listening companions.
failing that you could always arrange for a necromancer to bind her to you. As friends, the Undead make excellent listening companions.
Laugh Often, Smile Much, Post lolcats Always