Forums > Social Chat > Once upon a time...

Posted: 29th Sep 2004
"Of COURSE not!" they yelled with delight, looking in awe and amazement as the beautiful flutterby buggered off, "here, use our fuel".

"If it's all the same to you, if ya don't mind, i'll use THIS!" replied Silvur, and whipped a pot of the awesomely rare and mind bogglingly expensive hyberbright rainbow gloop. He dipped his wicks into it, shook them off, and got a light off the nearest nymph. Andy n Bunny had been awestruck by the loveliness of the flutterby but even that was eclipsed by the dazzling rainbow trails Silvur left as he spun and danced. "Grab some yourself folks," he said, " I've got GALLONS back at my camp". The three spinners spent all day and all night spinning and teaching and learning and spinning some more. It was THE best time. Little did they know it was soon to end, because out of the bushes there suddenly leapt................

It's smashing to be back x

Posted: 30th Sep 2004
a GIGANTIC EVIL TREE-FROGG!!!

"YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" the gigantic evil tree frog yelled as loud as he possibly could as he came crashing and bounding out of the bushed and crashed into the happy, peaceful little gathering.

and in the blink of an eye, the happy little fyrenymphs spun around an magically tranformed into an entire little army of nymph-warriors, complete with little swords!!

"yeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!" the tiny fyrenymphs screamed right back.

Silvur turned to andy and said "oh my god!! we're in the middle of a freaking battlefeild!!!"

andy looked at silvur; "you think???" they grabbed bunny (who up until this point was completely oblivious to the entire thing) and ran like mad to the edge of the clearing, close to the trees. they collapsed into a tired heap on the ground.

"phew. that was close." silvur said, as she panted to catch her breath.

....

Posted: 3rd Oct 2004
"but what about all the nymphs?" bunny who had finally snaped out of her trance yelled "we can just leave them there! they need help!" and with out waiting to see that the others where following her she lept out of the bushes and bounded over to help the little warrior-nymphs. andy and silvur looked at each other and both ran out to join bunny and the nymphs in their bid to fight of the gigantic evil tree frog.

for what seemed like hours (but may have in fact only been a matter of minutes) everyone battled untill andy had the ingenious idea of using fire to fight of the gigantic evil tree frog. as one the 3 brave hoppers lit their firetoys and the worrior nymphs once again returned to fire and at last they drov off the gigantic evil tree frog.

"well" said silvur dusting of her hands "now what...

What if we think the jokes on them,
But really - the jokes on us....

and also... i wuv Rougie *snuz*

Posted: 3rd Oct 2004
out jumped thafitz from behind a nearby tree tired and bloody. "damn you bunny" he shouted, "that evil tree frog held the key to eternal...
EDITED_BY: thafitz (1096808785)

Posted: 3rd Oct 2004
life of milk, which noddy needs for his grand master plan for......

Remember.........YOU LOSE!!!

Posted: 3rd Oct 2004
making an ever lasting... milk truck! "but noddy!" everyone shouted together "we thought you where on the side of good!"

"wel...l" said noddy in a low voice, and everyoned in a little closer to here him ...

What if we think the jokes on them,
But really - the jokes on us....

and also... i wuv Rougie *snuz*

Posted: 4th Oct 2004
.....and while they were leaning closer, straining to hear, and while Andy was busy mortified and apologising humbly and groveling on his knees for the TERRIBLY sexist assumption that Silvur was male, and Silvur was occupied smirking and making the bugger squirm, and everyone was getting their breath back after the fight, the evil Noddy, and his dastardly side kick Big Tears whipped out a mercury net that had been hidden in Noddys (quite fetching) tunic threw it over them all, nymphs included. "Alas we're DOOMED!", wailed Bunny, "everyone KNOWS how indestructable and unbreakable this kind of net is, every time you try to cut the metal threads it simply becomes liquid and melts around your knife, like the metal a robot in a hideously crap film starring a grossly overpumped Austrian with exceedingly dodgy politics in a hitherto unheard of parallel universe might appear to be made out of!". "OH NO!" they all cried in unison, "what will happen to us now?". As one they turned to face the very very evil Noddy, who laughed in a very very evil manner and said....................

It's smashing to be back x

Posted: 4th Oct 2004
YOU ARE ALL INDENIAL!

'no we are not' says andy
'omg you are!' says fire bunny, andy begins to cry his tear break the net, all cheer! apart from silvur who.......

Remember.........YOU LOSE!!!

Posted: 4th Oct 2004
all the while was sitting calmly, and making strange "ohmm" sounds as she did. and as she did this, she slowly began to levitate.

"Cool!!" shouted bunny. "lemme try." and she did it too, and also began to levitate. pretty soon, everyone was levitating and and the indestructable net did not break, but slowly began to rise up, through the trees, through the clouds, and away from eveil noddy and his evil tree frog gang.

andy pulled out his remote control steering wheel and began to steer the indestructable net that now slightly resembled a bit of a bubble.

"ahoy maties!!" andy shouted. "we're off and away, and coming up too..."

Posted: 5th Oct 2004
.......one of "lighter than clouds" service stations that scttered the sky at regular intervals. "Oooh I need a wee, can we stop please?" asked Silvur, who unnoticed by anyone else had started bobbing up n down and rocking gently back and forth in a "f**k me i need a p**s" kind of way. "Well, we can stop for a toilet break but I don't wanna eat here, the food's crap, the veggie options are even crapper, the seats are uncumfy and it costs a bloody fortune," Andy grumbled in a tone that didn't invite debate about the issue, "we'll all go to the toilet here then stop somewhere safe for a picnic, I have lots of instafeast packs in bag". "yummy! instafeasts!" was the general reaction to this information. So, with his remote control steering wheel and a big smile on his face....Andy gently alighted on the forecourt of the service station. He went to the gents, had a wee, washed his hands, and returned to where he had parked, only to find................

It's smashing to be back x

Posted: 5th Oct 2004
...the entire service station had been hit by a gigantic bomb made of skittles, and everyone was grabbing them and eating them by the handful!!!!

YUM!!

but wait... could it be?? why yes, it's... it's...

Posted: 5th Oct 2004
skittles made of funk! everyone who ate them started bustin out in disco style! A little green man could be seen in the distance shouting "get up off my shizzle!" but.... they couldn't control the insane amount of funk flowing through them as levitating disco balls started flying around and pimp mobiles rolled up....

one of the pimps got out and said... "

Clean for 6 months and counting... ah yeah, that's nice.

Posted: 9th Oct 2004
"what the f**k are you f**kers doing on my f**kin patch man?!!" It appeared that the pimp wasn't a happy chappy, "this is where I sell my wares you f**kers, and you are killing my business, so get the f**k outa here before I start killing YOU!"

Alas, our intrepid gang couldn't go ANYWHERE. For a start it was very dificult to hear what the pimp was saying over the music. Very very dificult. And even if they HAD been able to hear everything what could they have done? Well? WELL? I'm talking to YOU! What do you think thay could do?...................................

It's smashing to be back x

Posted: 9th Oct 2004
suddenly as the mooon split threw the crowds the people began to wake is if from a dream clutching one another they stared into the insanity of each others eyes and began a transcendental journey throw the mind exploring the vast caverns of their own mentality which ultimately ended up in the obliteration of a small feline like animal threw galaxies away who was tasting a poisonous rock to see if the flavour was right and then......

It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potato's.

Posted: 10th Oct 2004
and one time....
at band camp
this story is not for little kids so I should tell it anyways

Posted: 10th Oct 2004
they stoped. what in the hell just happend... last thing i remeber was a boom o skittles and then i must have hit mi head!" firebunny looked around her dased. but at least she wasnt alone. there seemed to be plenty of other hopers with a confussed looking expresion on their face as they all looked around to find themselfs of a purple and pink moon with what looked a little like a green with blue spots cat sitting pawing rocks... the cat suppently stoped and noticed all of the gathered around hopers as if she? he? it? had noticed them for the first time. with a "hear-we-go-again" kindo look on his? hers? its? face sat up on its? hers? his? hind legs and said..."welcome to the ...

What if we think the jokes on them,
But really - the jokes on us....

and also... i wuv Rougie *snuz*

Posted: 11th Oct 2004
.. . . . . basic spelling and punctuation class," he, she, it purred smugly, "all of you need it desperately!"

"do'nt bee sow cheaky!" was Andy's riposte.

"Cheeky? CHEEKY?", the cat like thing appeared outraged, "I have been watching you all from a safe distance for a little while and I can ASSURE you that you ALL make spelling and grammar and punctuation mistakes that a baboon would feel ashamed of."

There was a very loud stunned silence.

"So, before this story goes ANY further you are ALL going to sit down for ten minutes and have a crash course in how not to annoy a pedantic being like me!" With that the cat made a motion with both front paws for everyone to sit down where they were, and after a little bit of shuffling and grumbling caused by Silvur and Bunny pushing rudely through the crowd to ensure that they could both sit next to Andy, everyone sat still and listened. Boy oh boy was the cat a fantastic teacher. They all learned so much about the english language that no spelling, grammar or punctuation mistake was ever made by anyone in HOP ever again. Except by Andy who had spent the whole lesson thinking thanks goodness these two lovely girls I'm sat between can't read minds because they would run off and never talk to me again for a dirty filthy sex mad perv. Oh, and except for the girls in question,both of whom spent the entire lesson thinking thank god Andy can't read minds because he'd run off and never talk to us again for being dirty filthy sex mad pervs. Oh, and the fire nymph sat directly behind the three of them, who COULD read minds and spent the next three months wandering around with a blissed out look in its eyes and developed a well earned reputation amongst all the other nymphs for being a dirty filthy sex mad perv. After the lesson, the three of them stood up, adjusted their clothing, and................

It's smashing to be back x

Posted: 16th Oct 2004
,trying not to make eye contacted with each other hurryed off to catch up with the others who had followed the cat like thing to the round door. "please go jump through this door. you will all desend town a slid for 4.3 meters before landing on a large matris -(Bunny and Silvur both looked up at, who was stearing straight ahead with a dazed look apon his face, blushed and looked away),- beside the matrise there is a large carpet. it is a flying carpet. you will all bord this carpet. please do so quitly. time is short." and with that the cat like thing walked away with out so much as a glance over it/his/her shoulder.

As one all of the HoPers moved over to the round door. one by one they all jumped through the door. it seemed to them, that they didnt so much as where sucked down the tub like slide, and all landed in a very ungracefully pile on the matress, which luckerly was very soft. once everyone was on the flying carpet (bunny silvur and andy all siting together once more) it slowly started to rise. it puffed. then it guggled a little bit, the slowly started to shimer and flick in waves, and all of a sudden everyone relised they were...

What if we think the jokes on them,
But really - the jokes on us....

and also... i wuv Rougie *snuz*

Posted: 16th Oct 2004
...NOT flying at ALL....but floating...underwater!! How odd that they weren't drowning! But my oh my....if you thought the view from above mountains on a flying carpet would have been good, it was nothing compared to what they could see now. Crystal blue waters, ten gazzilion million billion beautiful fish, the sun shimmering on the surface of the water, David Attenborough filming a shark documentary...it was all truly stunning. What lucky peeps they were, to be in such an amazing para.....oh my god what was that?

It's smashing to be back x

Posted: 16th Oct 2004
startled Bunny clung to Andy as a dark shadow drifted above them. looking up they saw a whale and her calf swim slowly and gracefully over top. with a moment of fear past bunny relised that she was huging Andys arm, she felt his musles flex benith her hand, and looked up only to see the stromy look that silvur was giving the pair of them she tryed to disintangl herself only to potch up the job and end up clocking him in the face. embarrsed she looked out to the water and the sene around them. what was that sitting on that rock looking at them? a mermaid! flowing greeny blue hair swerled around her face, and as the carpet took them closer they were able to see the pile shimering scules that cressed the top of her forhead and the edges of her face. her large slanting eyes help a mistery about them that led you to belive that she knew more about you than she could in reson, and yet she did. her deep red full lips parted and the bubbling swerling voice that spoke told them...

What if we think the jokes on them,
But really - the jokes on us....

and also... i wuv Rougie *snuz*

Posted: 16th Oct 2004
"I hope I get a discount on account of you lot being five minutes and (she looked at her watch, a swish Breitling number waterproof to 10,000 feet)....thirtysix seconds late!"

Baffled, the intrepid travellers looked at one another. Bunny was wondering what the beautiful mermaid could possibly mean. Silvur was wondering the same thing, and also when she could get the three of them would get two minutes privacy together so she could tell them what happened at band camp. Andy wondered how he could pick his nose without either of the delish gals seeing him.

"Well?" asked the mermaid, "am I to get my food discounted or am I going to have to write to your head office?". Suddenly everything became clear! Bunny realised it the mermaid was talking about pizza delivery that was late. Silvur sent them both a private message. Andy used slight of hand, pointing at a lovely, translucent jelly fish, and while the girls where distracted, instead of trying to look at thier boobs, which was his usual trick when he thought neither of them was looking, he picked his nose and wiped the bogey on the underneath of the carpet.
"Sorry beautiful, enchanting mysterious mermaid type creature," Bunny responed, with a sympathetic tone, "but I am afraid your pizza is going to be even later than you thought. We are intrepid travellers seeking fame fortune and lots of fun, alas not pizza delivery people." "Bog off and leave me alone then!" grumped the mermaid, and swam back under her rock. "I've got a remarkable idea!" said Silvur with a start, "lets..................

It's smashing to be back x

Posted: 17th Oct 2004
meditating! then maybe we call all visit the therd place!" and with that all the hoppers sat down and began to meditate. the only sound that could be hurd around was the strange
"ooooommMmmooooo"

when they opened their eyes snaping out of their trance like state they found themselfs...

What if we think the jokes on them,
But really - the jokes on us....

and also... i wuv Rougie *snuz*

Posted: 18th Oct 2004
floating lazily to the surface of the water. Little did they know that meditating underwater causes more oxygen to be produced in the body than normal, and this was causing them to rise. when their heads bobbed through the surface, they found themselves............

It's smashing to be back x

Posted: 18th Oct 2004
On a not so very unpleasant island which smelt a lot like the smell of a laundrymat.

On the island was nothing but a plam tree and a very confused looking pimp.

Andy and falaming bun swim towards the island. The pimp sees them and opens his mouth to shout yet more abuse but...

The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."

Posted: 19th Oct 2004
was drowned out by the sounds of thumping coming from the grove of trees behind the pimp! silvur looked worried and (just a little bit) afraid. she cluched andy's arm.

"what was that, andy?" she asked, noticing just how firebunny was trudging up the beach behind them, fuming with jealousy.

silvur pretended not to notice.

"do you think it's a monster??"

Posted: 20th Oct 2004
"i don't no" said andy, "but what ever it is its coming this way..."
"oooh no what sell we do?" asked silvur clutching tighter still to Andys arm, and trying very hard to ignore the heat coming off his body, and the way he smelt (good smell not bad smell) and... trying to focus on the possible danger that may be facing them...
andy who was also trying to leave his mind on the rustling bushes suddenly noticed that there was only one viaing for his attention. looking around he was that bunny was still behind them coming up the beach, looking rather red in the face. just when she and the rest of the hopers had reached them, there was a loud noise and they all turned around to see that the thing that was behind the bushes was behind the bushes no more...

What if we think the jokes on them,
But really - the jokes on us....

and also... i wuv Rougie *snuz*

Posted: 21st Oct 2004
Several things happened all at once.
The pimp ran off squealing with fear and was last seen swimming round in cricles off the coast of Cuba.
Bunny ran up and gripped Andy's other arm.
Silvur gripped even tighter.
Andy snuck a peek down their tops.
The hideously monstrous, slobbering thing that had emerged from the bushes smiled (in a hideously monsterous, slobbering, but none the less friendly kind of way), and bowed.
There was a further rustling in the bushes behind the creature.
There was a further rustling in in Andy's pants.
The rustling in the pants was NOT inspired by the hideously monstrous, slobbering creature.
Andy ran out of imagination and left it to the next author to continue the story.........................

It's smashing to be back x

Posted: 25th Oct 2004


(and all this time I thought the sounds coming from the bushed was the coconuts falling to the ground!!)

The hideously monstrous, slobbering thing looked at the group with a bit of a suspicious eye, but decided that they were very much less of a threat to him that he was to them, and so decieded to make an attempt to be friendly.

"uh... hello" said the hideously monstrous, slobbering thing, in his most polite voice.

scielence ensued.

The hideoulsy monsterous, slobbering thing shifted his weight from foot to foot.

finally, the silence was broken by...

Posted: 25th Oct 2004
one of the three letting out a rather loud, rather wet sounding fart!

"oh GOODY!" gabbled the hideously monstrous, slobbering thing, "you speak Garglefrak!". Unfortunately, none of our intrepid heroes could understand a word, because the hideously monstrous, slobbering thing was speaking its natural language, Garglefrakian, which to the untrained ear sounds much like someone farting. Even more unfortunately, the actual fart that the hideously monstrous, slobbering thing misinterpreted as Garglefrakian, stank like a very smelly horrible thing left in a smelly bin to ferment for a few months. "Would you all like to come for tea?" asked the hideously monstrous, slobbering thing, rather politely it thought, considering how badly these creatures smelled! "Farty fart fart fart farty pump" was what the travellers heard. They all looked at one another, the expressions on their faces a cross between bafflement at the noises eminating from the hideously monstrous slobbering thing, disgust at the awful fart and bafflement at which dirty beast had let it go in the first place.
The hideously monstrous, slobbering thing sighed at the stupid creatures, shurugged its three pairs of shoulders, and slithered off back into the bushes. Everyone else waited till the fart ha subsided so they could take a deep breath, and clomped their way into the bushes after the creature......

It's smashing to be back x

Posted: 25th Oct 2004
Andy let out a rather evil sounding laugh.

"It's hunting time!!!" he said, with a sadistic voice. "Come to Papa!!"

And with that, he promptly forgot about the two beautiful girls on either arm, and ran off into the bushes flailing a sharp spear-like object as he ran.