Forums > Introductions > Doc Lightning: the HOP Mad Doctor
Login/Join to ParticipateHOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
Name: Mike
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA (A.K.A. The Best City In The World)
Hometown: Bloomfield Hills, MI, USA
DOB: 8 July 1977
Age: 34
Sex: I'm married, so not very often anymore.
Gender: OH! You meant THAT! I am biologically male and I identify as such.
Occupation: Physician (Pediatrics)
Favorite Food: Sushi
Favorite Colors: Red and Blue
Toys: Poi, Staff, Flags, Glowsticks, Contact Ball, Eating Torches
Hobbies other than the obvious: Cooking, camping, swimming, sailing, skiing, molecular biology, reading, traveling.
Education: B.S. Biological Sciences, Stanford University 2000
M.S. Biological Sciences, Stanford University 2001
M.D. University of Michigan, 2005
Favorite Book(s): The Mars Trilogy by Kim Stanley Robinson
The Foundation Series by Isaac Asimov
The Revelation Space series by Alastair Reynolds.
Favorite Movies: Baraka, Run Lola Run, The Fifth Element, Snatch, City of God, The Incredibles
Favorite TV shows: I don't really watch TV.
What I want to do when I grow up: At long last, I am DOING it! Yes, I am actually doing my dream job and I'M GETTING PAID WELL TO DO IT!!!
Fun fact: I have had to run from the police. While naked. Twice. And I got away both times.
Boring fact: A 7-day course of oral prednisone at 60mg/day increased esophageal gastric acid contact time in stable adult asthmatics.
Favorite Music Artists/Composers: Trance[]Control, Beethoven, Enigma, Bach, Airbase, Haydn, Astral Projection, Shpongle, Vivaldi, Juno Reactor, Bob Marley, Mozart, Handel.
Favorite beverage: Diet Dr. Pepper
Favorite Incense: Japanese cherry blossom
Number of strange categories I can come up with: infinite
Marmite/Vegemite/Nutella orientation: High Priest of the Holy Church of Nutella.
Ok, so that's me. Now you post something.
EDITED_BY: Doc Lightning (1317185783)
-Mike
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella
A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura
Mand's Girl....and The Not So Shy One
2,723 posts
Location: Calgary, Alberta Canada
*Smirk* It's ok dear. Really.
Solitude sometimes speaks to you, and you should listen.
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA
i can do the expression really well. really. you just have to imagine the eyebrow up.
**giggles**
I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.
**giggles**
133 posts
Location: montreal: bagel capital
*imagines the eye-brow up* Why that's perfect! I knew you could do it
I used to have fun with mirrors too: except that I'd put it on the ground with the dog standing over it. Animals tend to freak out when the nearest thing to the ground seems to be the ceiling.
there is no better way to say I love you than with the gift of a spatula!
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
pounce, does that count as cruelty to animals?
-Mike
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella
A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA
**giggles**
i don't know. but i'd imagine it'd be fun to watch. though if it's cruelty to animals, then my guess is it would also be child abuse when you put a baby in front of a mirror. they get so confused.....
I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.
**giggles**
133 posts
Location: montreal: bagel capital
I believe it's also cruelty to animals to give them a bath. My neighbors called the SPCA (Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals) on me twice while I was washing my dog: the older one still screams as though she was being skinned alive everytime I wash-away whatever she had the leisure of rolling herself in.
But appart from that they're both fantastic puppies!
there is no better way to say I love you than with the gift of a spatula!
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
Have you ever seen that E-mail forward on how to bathe a cat?
-Mike
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella
A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
CAT BATHING AS A MARTIAL ART (found it!
)1. Know that although the kitty cat has the advantage of quickness and lack of concern for human life, you have the advantage of strength. Capitalize on that advantage by selecting the battlefield. Don't try to bathe him in an open area where he can force you to chase him. Pick a very small bathroom. If your bathroom is more than four feet square, we recommend that you get in the tub with the cat and close the sliding-glass doors as if you were about to take a shower. (A simple shower curtain will not do. A berserk cat can shred a three-ply rubber shower curtain quicker than a politician can shift positions.)
2. Know that a cat has claws and will not hesitate to remove all the skin from your body. Your advantage here is that you are smart and know how to dress to protect yourself. We recommend canvas overalls tucked into high-top construction boots, a pair of steel-mesh gloves, an army helmet, a hockey face-mask, and a long-sleeved flak jacket.
3. Use the element of surprise. Pick up your cat nonchalantly, as if to simply carry him to his supper dish. (Cats will not usually notice your strange attire. They have little or no interest in fashion as a rule.)
4. Once you are inside the bathroom, speed is essential to survival. In a single liquid motion, shut the bathroom door, step into the tub enclosure, slide the glass door shut, dip the cat in the water and squirt him with shampoo. You have now begun one of the wildest 45 seconds of your life.
5. Cats have no handles. Add the fact that he now has soapy fur, and the problem is radically compounded. Do not expect to hold on to him for more than two or three seconds at a time. When you have him, however, you must remember to give him another squirt of shampoo and rub like crazy. He'll then spring free and fall back into the water, thereby rinsing himself off. (The national record for cats is three latherings, so don't expect too much.)
6. Next, the cat must be dried. Novice cat bathers always assume this part will be the most difficult, for humans generally are worn out at this point and the cat is just getting really determined. In fact, the drying is simple compared with what you have just been through. That's because by now the cat is semi-permanently affixed to your right leg.
7. You simply pop the drain plug with your foot, reach for your towel and wait. (Occasionally, however, the cat will end up clinging to the top of your army helmet. If this happens, the best thing you can do is to shake him loose and to encourage him toward your leg.) After all the water is drained from the tub, it is a simple matter to just reach down and dry the cat.
In a few days the cat will relax enough to be removed from your leg. He will usually have nothing to say for about three weeks and will spend a lot of time sitting with his back to you. He might even become psychoceramic and develop the fixed stare of a plaster figurine.
You will be tempted to assume he is angry. This isn't usually the case. As a rule he is simply plotting ways to get through your defenses and injure you for life the next time you decide to give him a bath. But at least now he smells a lot better.
-Mike
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella
A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
*Lightning runs into his intro thread, hits the big red BUMP button on the wall and runs out*
-Mike
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella
A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA
gets magically drawn into the thread by a strange force. looks around.
hey, where is everyone?
I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.
**giggles**
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
I dunno. But I just installed a new hot tub on the back porch...
-Mike
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella
A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA
ooooh. that's where i'm headed if anyone is looking for me!!!
wanders off to hot tub while peeling off clothes along the way
I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.
**giggles**
Carpal \'Tunnel
5,814 posts
Location: Perth, Australia
Cat bathing......
......very amusing..
is off to join Pounce and see how catlike she really is
Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?
Im in a lonely battle with the world with a fish to match the chip on my shoulder. Gnu in Binnu in a cnu
2,568 posts
Location: sitting on the step
*barges in rumbling around the room* rumble rumble rumble *to create a thunderstorm*
*then jumps in the hot tub and jumps around to create some tidal waves just to add to the effect of her storm*
she who sees from up high smiles
Patrick badger king: *they better hope there's never a jihad on stupidity*
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA
very nice effects narr. i am very catlike except when it comes to water. i enjoy my baths
I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.
**giggles**
2,568 posts
Location: sitting on the step
*was rather hoping lightning would join in with the umm..lightning effects!!!*
she who sees from up high smiles
Patrick badger king: *they better hope there's never a jihad on stupidity*
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA
that would be rather appropriate!here lemme help until then...
reaches into her bag of props...
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oops, wrong one. lemme put that back
ok lemme try again....
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oops!! wrong again
puts that back. reaches in one more time...
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oh my! definately wrong there. that was for my thread!
rushes to put that away
ok i swear i'll get it right this time...
rummages through bag...
oh here we go
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I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.
**giggles**
Carpal \'Tunnel
5,814 posts
Location: Perth, Australia
dives under the bed.....
lightning that close scares the bejesus out of me....nearly got hit as a child....shower of sparksover me and a huge clap of thunder.....
shivers
Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?
Im in a lonely battle with the world with a fish to match the chip on my shoulder. Gnu in Binnu in a cnu
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA
oh my!!! lemme protect you! here, come hide in my bossom!
I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.
**giggles**
Carpal \'Tunnel
5,814 posts
Location: Perth, Australia
loses herself in this damn fine bosum......ahhhhhhh...
Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?
Im in a lonely battle with the world with a fish to match the chip on my shoulder. Gnu in Binnu in a cnu
2,568 posts
Location: sitting on the step
*carries on rumbling around the room*
she who sees from up high smiles
Patrick badger king: *they better hope there's never a jihad on stupidity*
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
*raises hands dramatically*
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Thank you, Thank you!
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-Mike
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella
A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA
ooh, very impressive! you are so much better at that than i am! hope i did a decent job filling in in your absence
I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.
Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.
**giggles**
Keeper of the Spitfire
2,317 posts
Location: Calgary Canada
Oooh, I LOVE lightning!
Yeah, thats the person and the flashy stuff!
One great memory I have of last summer was sitting on the edge of a cliff in the Ardeche (France), watching a truly amazing storm. There was a few storms rattling around, and they were really close. There was about 3 or 4 flashes of lightning almost every second.
Six of us sat there with some beers, and no one said a word. Any input from us would have spoilt the effect. It was great show of nature at its best.
Lets steal a spaceship and head for the sun, and shoot the stars with a lemonade ray gun.
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
Mand, I have similar stories, like yours, that are the reason why I chose my name.
I grew up on a lake and our house had huge floor-to-ceiling windows that overlooked the lake. Michigan is at the north end of "Tornado Alley," which is a region of the United States that spans most of the center of the country from northern Texas and running northwesterly up just into the south of Michigan.
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In the Midwest, the landscape is very flat and the conditions are ideal for the formation of some of the most severe storms found anywhere on land. And when we didn't have to be huddling in the basement due to a tornado warning, I would sit and watch the storms roll across the lake.
I used to be terrified of thunderstorms, like most little kids are. But one day a friend of my mom's was visiting from out of town and taught me that if I counted seconds between a lightning strike and the thunder, that equalled one mile of distance. Fascinaton overruled fear and she and I sat one evening and watched a spectacular July thunderstorm with lightining strikes at least once every second or two and thunder so loud it rattled the windows.
In fact, thunderstorms are the only thing I will miss when I leave Michigan.
Unfortunately, my house now has no good windows with a suitable view for watching a storm.
However, by far, the most amazing weather phenomenon I ever saw happened on January when I was 16 or 17. I awoke in the middle of the night to the sound of... thunder. Now, if you live in the Midwest, you know that you never hear thunder in January. And this was especially curious because it had been snowing when I went to bed that night.
I opened my blinds and looked outside to see the fiercest blizzard I had ever seen. I couldn't see more than a meter into the snow with the floodlights on outside the house. But every few seconds, there was a brilliant flash of light...lightning...and thunder. I was incredibly confused, but the next day on the news they said that it had been a "thundersnow," a rare kind of storm that combines heavy snowfall and lightning. We got almost a meter of snow that night and school was canceled the next morning.
It's unlikely I'll ever see another one.
-Mike
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella
A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura
Carpal \'Tunnel
5,814 posts
Location: Perth, Australia
Wow lightning.
..how gloriousBest I can do in natural phenomena is a night rainbow...
Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?
Im in a lonely battle with the world with a fish to match the chip on my shoulder. Gnu in Binnu in a cnu
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
A night rainbow?
-Mike
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella
A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura
Carpal \'Tunnel
5,814 posts
Location: Perth, Australia
Was horse riding one night and seen a large rainbow arc in the sky.
The colours were like dark velvet....
Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?
Im in a lonely battle with the world with a fish to match the chip on my shoulder. Gnu in Binnu in a cnu
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
What was making it? The moon?
-Mike
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella
A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura
Carpal \'Tunnel
5,814 posts
Location: Perth, Australia
Not sure what caused the rainbow but it had the arcs as a normal rainbow but the colours were of the night.
I asked science teachers at the time and they had no explantion either.
I cant remember if there was a moon, it was 20 years ago, but the memory the arc itself it is still vivid.
Nature is grand.....
Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?
Im in a lonely battle with the world with a fish to match the chip on my shoulder. Gnu in Binnu in a cnu
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