Forums > Social Chat > What REALLY grinds your gears and makes you flip?
Login/Join to ParticipateStar Trekker
1,733 posts
Location: Cheshire, United Kingdom
I had a terrible temper when I was a kid and up until the last few years I really struggled to control it - not violent, aggressive.
Yesterday i felt the switch go inside me and the temper flooding thru me - just from an eMail from my new boss. So i got to thinking what makes us flip and how it's expressed.
For me it's:
- My loved ones being threatened in anyway, even verbally (it's not good to admit but I would kill for my neices and nephews I know I would)
- Bullies - I HATE bullies and love nothing more than putting them in their place, being married to one and getting out of it gives me the strength to stand up to them even if they're much bigger then me.
- Injustice & cruelty - particularly to children
- being patronised or putdown. This is one I'm not happy about because I think it's to do with pride and this is what the new boss was doing.
And how do i express it?
- a look, people literally run if my eyes go which i hate cos I'm usually mad at a situation not them
- be witheringly sarcastic, use all the power of my vocabulary to put them down, boy do i feel good at the time, but afterwards i feel like a complete s***t
- cry hot tears of anger and frustration at having to supress the primeval desire to destroy them
So are you all the lovely, placid, emotionally mature characters you appear to be or is there a darker side....?
'The last rays of crimson on the spindle tree as the cerise fruit splits and reveals its orange seeds in a gloriously clashing colour scheme no-one would ever dare to wear'
Euonymous Europeus
Carpal \'Tunnel
4,172 posts
Location: Hastings, United Kingdom
People generally being not nice, or my parents being not very good parents, usually tick me off
Every morning on my way to school I walk past a group of 6 boys and girls. Boy's usually say something along the lines of 'morning sexay! and the girls giggle and laugh as I give them evil scowels.
The other day boys wern't there so girls stare at me and say 'I'm watching yoooooou!'
Aimee stops, turns ever so slowly, stares at the girls for a few seconds and says 'Your lucky I don't turn around and wallop one of youse next time I walk past' *insert swears where appropiate*
I love the way the girls just sorta shrink into the bus stop evrytime i walk past
the boys im still working on.....dammit I just can't help being sexy :rolleyes:
EDITED_BY: *Aimée* (1102959087)
Redneck Woman
566 posts
Location: Texas, Yeeeeehaaaaaw, USA
i get very mad easily...but i use force when i get pissed.
The main thing that pisses me off is when i see a guy hit a girl. I will walk over to those ppl and hurt the guy...ive just always been like that
Top Three Things I've Learn While Being A Mom
1. Baby poop comes in many colors.
2. Makes sure all dirty diapers are not accessable to my dog.
3. Burp rags are not big enough.
1,489 posts
Location: state of confusion
i had that same problem wild when i was younger, i found ways to deal with it, but like everyone else i know its still there, the thing for me is that there is no consistant thing that sets me off, it can be somthing from stubing my toe, to stupid drivers, to drunk people bumbing into me in a club.....
You can't avoid pain by fencing yourself from it.
Some times you need the help of others more than anything else
But you have to let them close enough to help......
People want to be needed, I found that out too
Star Trekker
1,733 posts
Location: Cheshire, United Kingdom
Fryed - how does it show itself? can you internalise it or does it leak out?
Ladies you're so confident for your ages! God i admire you for that, i was always so timid and scared of everything...
just a late developer i reckon
'The last rays of crimson on the spindle tree as the cerise fruit splits and reveals its orange seeds in a gloriously clashing colour scheme no-one would ever dare to wear'
Euonymous Europeus
1,489 posts
Location: state of confusion
imagine you have a wild animal. it's completely feral and can not adapt to everyday situations. so put this animal in cage. its a small animal right now sure, but its get bigger and bigger, the cage no longer holds it and it escapes till you can find another cage to hold, but the messed up part is, you know that this will be an on going cycle for the rest of your life.....
*************im using the caged animal thing as metaphor, i do not condone the caging of any creature*************
it shows itself it several dif ways. sometimes i just want to be left alone to blow off steam away from everyone, other times i look for any kind of arguement i can get into.........does that answer your question child?
You can't avoid pain by fencing yourself from it.
Some times you need the help of others more than anything else
But you have to let them close enough to help......
People want to be needed, I found that out too
veteran
1,508 posts
Location: Out, United Kingdom
Im pretty good at keeping my temper, people can wind me up but i lose it or shout or anything, im generally a pretty chilled out person...
...but there is one thing that can really p1ss me right off!! - the weather! I have to bike in and out of work every day, some of which of course is uphill, and when the wind is blowing in the opposite direction to me i flip out cos it pushes me backwards (in relation to the speed i would like to be travelling). Rain i can handle, even snow and hail, but wind gets on my tits!
AAARRRGGGHHH!!! My giant stick broke!!! In two!!! My stick broke in two!!! 
veteran
1,389 posts
Location: Guelph, ON, Canada
I don't really have a temper. I can't stand being mad at something for more than five minutes. Unless I get insulted. And then I normally keep it in.
But there was one time, in the train station....
No, I just shouted at the idiot. I just really don't get mad... I tend to laugh things off more, just the way I am. And most of the times when I seem mad, I'm just pretending
~ Bobo
wie weit, wie weit noch?
fragst mich, wo wir gewesen sind...
du fehlst hier
515 posts
Location: Cyprus
Ive got a terrible habbit of botteling up everything that annoys me. When it does eventually all come out, i tend to walk away from sight/hearing distance of anyone, scream shout swear and hit an innanomate object...I know thats really stupid but i dont like people seeing me upset or angry and it seems to work.
Henry Hill - 'One day the kids from the neighbourhood carried my mothers groceries all the way home, you know why? It was out of respect'...
ahmet_20valve_ahmet(at)hotmail(dot)com
Hope all is well : )
Self-Flagellation Expert
3,414 posts
Location: Bogged at CG, Australia
im a bottler too. i look at myself as a green stick. I'll bend, i'll bend a fair way, but watch it, cos if you bend too far, i'll either slip out of your hand and whack you in the face, or i'll snap.
flinging back and hitting in the face is usually the better of the two outcomes. I'll get sarcastic, i'll use every neuron i can to make you feel ant sized. then squish you.
Snapping is where it gets nasty. im learning to bring myself under control when it does happen, but its hard. last time i really went off, i smacked a guy in the throat as hard as i could four or five times. At that point, i really did want to kill him, and he was the only thing in existance. Kinda scares me a lot, that does.
"beg beg grovel beg grovel"
"master"
--FSA
"There was an arse there, i couldn't help myself"
--Rougie
Star Trekker
1,733 posts
Location: Cheshire, United Kingdom
Fryed - you must scare yourself controlling that beast, good luck to you
Flame Boy - wish it was only the wind that wound me up
, but if you're usually so chilled, it must be a strange feeling for you!Bobo - oh I envy you your peace of mind and equanimity
Hairs on Fire - you seem to have it sussed and under control, good for you
but if I bottle it up for too long I worry I'll either explode like a volcano or burn myself up from the inside!MiG - like looking in a mirror! I'm the sweetest thing til the straw that breaks the camel's back - then, yeah you got the snapping bit just right.
'The last rays of crimson on the spindle tree as the cerise fruit splits and reveals its orange seeds in a gloriously clashing colour scheme no-one would ever dare to wear'
Euonymous Europeus
515 posts
Location: Cyprus
Seems to work but it does take along time for it to come out. Last time took nearly 6 mnonths of fustration an annoyance eating away befor i finally blew...knuckles still sore lol
Henry Hill - 'One day the kids from the neighbourhood carried my mothers groceries all the way home, you know why? It was out of respect'...
ahmet_20valve_ahmet(at)hotmail(dot)com
Hope all is well : )
Star Trekker
1,733 posts
Location: Cheshire, United Kingdom
See? no-one's immune from the red curtain falling - apart from Bobo who's an allround sweetiepie
'The last rays of crimson on the spindle tree as the cerise fruit splits and reveals its orange seeds in a gloriously clashing colour scheme no-one would ever dare to wear'
Euonymous Europeus
1,489 posts
Location: state of confusion
thank you child, it gets easier with time, and alot of :meditation: plus there is always a positive to a negative, in my case, it has taught me GREAT self control and self discipline.......it also has brought me to find my religion (Taoism)
im not going to sit here and lie, and say i have complete control at all times, i dont, but i look at like an on going test from the universe..........
You can't avoid pain by fencing yourself from it.
Some times you need the help of others more than anything else
But you have to let them close enough to help......
People want to be needed, I found that out too
veteran
1,389 posts
Location: Guelph, ON, Canada
bobo got mad today
Well, more frustrated and annoyed. Sometimes my dad assumes too much. But parents are like that. I've vented it out, and am no longer mad/angry/frustrated/annoyed. Having someone you like, and get to talk to helps though
~ Bobo
wie weit, wie weit noch?
fragst mich, wo wir gewesen sind...
du fehlst hier
Star Trekker
1,733 posts
Location: Cheshire, United Kingdom
Written by: Fryed Fish
thank you child, it gets easier with time, and alot of :meditation: plus there is always a positive to a negative, in my case, it has taught me GREAT self control and self discipline.......it also has brought me to find my religion (Taoism)
Have to admit i know nothing of Taoism - quick low down?
For me it was looking at myself from the outside and seeing the hurt I cause other people with my outbursts - putting myself in their shoes and realising I wouldn't want to be on the receiving end or even witness it, and also that no-one ever put me thru it.
Bobo, how did you vent it out? other than talking to your significany other that is
'The last rays of crimson on the spindle tree as the cerise fruit splits and reveals its orange seeds in a gloriously clashing colour scheme no-one would ever dare to wear'
Euonymous Europeus
1,489 posts
Location: state of confusion
brief overview, one word, balance
what you have to understand is that Tao translates to The Way, so its different for each person. plus im not a conventioal Tao, is more like a base that i built off of, my belifes are, well mine
theres a book if your interested called The Essential Tao, it translates 2 fo the oldest versions, i cant remember the autho/translater, but im sure you can google it.......
You can't avoid pain by fencing yourself from it.
Some times you need the help of others more than anything else
But you have to let them close enough to help......
People want to be needed, I found that out too
member
121 posts
Location: USA
One thing that really gets me mad is when i see cheap shots in the sports i play, i get really mad, especially in hockey when the other team hits my goalie. usually, if im frustrated or have some anger from earlier in the game, or even from earlier in the day (School is enough to make anyone mad) i simply go out on the field or the ice and hit the first person i come to extremely hard.
not the most peacefull or reasonable course of action, but it does beat squeezing a stress ball
If you're a pyro and you know it, clap your hands! 
515 posts
Location: Cyprus
DONT EVER TOUCH THE GOALIE! Its like an unwritten rule ro sumthin...Most people say goalies are dumb but being a goalie has it advantages, seeing as how the whole team will explode if u get hit lol!
Henry Hill - 'One day the kids from the neighbourhood carried my mothers groceries all the way home, you know why? It was out of respect'...
ahmet_20valve_ahmet(at)hotmail(dot)com
Hope all is well : )
64 posts
Location: Cheltenham, England
Several triggers, like most people, but a big one for me is mental illness. Having an autistic little brother, I have a tendency to become somewhat 'touchy' when mental disabilities are mocked or spoken of in an unreasonable manner. It's a combination of 'that could be my brother' which pulls on the whole sibling-love/protection thing, and a general hatred of people being so moronic and nasty.
I can't be evil; I'm wearing pink.
veteran
1,389 posts
Location: Guelph, ON, Canada
Written by: Wild Child
Bobo, how did you vent it out? other than talking to your significany other that is
That's it. I talk about it. If I talk about it, I can figure out how stupid I was to get mad in the first place.
And I know that me being mad is a waste of my time and energy!! Also, I think that there is always a reason for an action. Most times, it is out of ignorance, and I believe that if their ignorance is pointed out to said person who made me mad, they will realise why that would anger someone else. However, if they realize their ignorance, and believe in it, then I can only pity them, and not get angry.
~ Bobo
wie weit, wie weit noch?
fragst mich, wo wir gewesen sind...
du fehlst hier
HoP's Barman. Trapped aged 6 months
4,437 posts
Location: Staines, United Kingdom
i hate 2 things mostly, chav's and women beaters!
An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind
Give a man a fish and he'll eat 4 a day hit a man with a brick and you can have all his fish and his wife
"Will's to pretty for prison" - Simian
247 posts
Location: Cork, Ireland at present
Most of the time I'm chilled out, very few things wind me up to the point of actually getting angry.... but... when I'm on the road... I turn into a mad-maronic-neanderthal with intent on commiting serious verbal assult on some of the dumb-arse drivers out there..... and I vented my anger by simply swearing all the
words I can at the poor passenger (normally my then girlfriend), then after 5 I'm normally cool again...ok sometimes I might have drived a bit aggressively 
but much preferred it when I just look blankly at them and think what a pratt they are.... I used to be indecisive, but I'm not so sure now.....
coming to a country near you
4,696 posts
Location: home of the tiney toothy bear, Australia
christmas(ok thats more of a new hobby, but still) and my mum when she is a keniving b****
"but have you considered there is more to life than your eyelids?"
jointly owned by Fire_Spinning_Angel and Blu_Valley
Insert Champagne Here
13,215 posts
Location: without class distinction, Australia
need to rant...
i hate it when you are planning a small get-together with friends, and people just invite their other halves along without asking. it REALLY gives me the irrites! or when they say "oh, me and my other half will be there.." and then ask you later if their other half can go!! I mean, if they'd said "beth, do you mind if my other half comes?" i'd say 'yes'...but it just annoys the hell out of me when its assumed!!!
maybe its just cos im single that this is annoying me...but then i remember to my bday party when i wasnt single and when i was working out the guest list and some people counted for 2 cos i knew they'd bring their other half.
it's really really annoying me!!!cos my small gathering is going to nearly double in size simply because people have other halves they are bringing! If i have a bf who is not in the same group of friends as me, i NEVER assume he is invited!!!!!
/rant
i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey
Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...
Star Trekker
1,733 posts
Location: Cheshire, United Kingdom
Written by: Borath
Several triggers, like most people, but a big one for me is mental illness. Having an autistic little brother, I have a tendency to become somewhat 'touchy' when mental disabilities are mocked or spoken of in an unreasonable manner. It's a combination of 'that could be my brother' which pulls on the whole sibling-love/protection thing, and a general hatred of people being so moronic and nasty.
A good friend of mine works with autistic young ppl, know where you're coming from - the ignorance and blinf discrimination from many ppl is awesome. love to you and your brother and your family
Rouge all us singles are tarred with that one - why should we feel like half a person cos we ain't got an 'other half'??!! and why are people joined at the hip and expect the invitation to be extended to theirs?
'The last rays of crimson on the spindle tree as the cerise fruit splits and reveals its orange seeds in a gloriously clashing colour scheme no-one would ever dare to wear'
Euonymous Europeus
9 posts
Location: Hellaware, DE
inorance, injustice, and traffic on 95 in Delaware
Death to all who disobey
Insert Champagne Here
13,215 posts
Location: without class distinction, Australia
One of my friends even said that she wouldnt come to the party unless her other half could!
I mean, really, it's 5 hours out of their lives...especially when this particular couple just came home from a 10 day holiday together!
i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey
Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...
Insert Champagne Here
13,215 posts
Location: without class distinction, Australia
I would also like to add, when you say "please tell me if you're coming so I can cater accordingly" and barely anyone tells me if they're coming!
i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey
Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...
Star Trekker
1,733 posts
Location: Cheshire, United Kingdom
Now that really is taking the pee - you're just left worrying that there's either too much or not enough and i'm never sure what's worse
'The last rays of crimson on the spindle tree as the cerise fruit splits and reveals its orange seeds in a gloriously clashing colour scheme no-one would ever dare to wear'
Euonymous Europeus
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