Forums > Help! > Breaking up advice?
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All High Dude, Ruler of What You Want
2,280 posts
Location: Trenton, MI, USA
All High Dude, Ruler of What You Want
2,280 posts
Location: Trenton, MI, USA
Posted:
Ok, I plan on breaking up with my girlfriend, first girlfriend so this is why I think I need some advice. On Monday I plan on breaking up with her, I would love to get some alone time with her so I could break it to her more politely, but she is being forced to help pack because she is moving (closer to me actually so it's not the reason) and has no free time. But I am afraid she'll hurt herself, or worse. When she broke up with me before, she couldn't stand to be without me and only after an hour she had cut herself. When I found this out, I also learned she and her friend used to do it, she hadn't done it in 2 years, and she has at a time wanted to and almost killed herself before her friend talked her out of it. I'm afraid because I pretty much know she'll end up cutting herself and I'm really afraid of the possibility of her killing herself.
And if you're wondering the reason I want to break up is my feelings for someone else have grown to an enormous extreme (again) and it got to the point where I'm doubting being with her while I'm with her. And lately every night I've been dreaming about being with this other girl, and I realized after fully getting up that this morning for 3 hours I had tried for 3 hours to try and fall asleep to keep dreaming about her because I missed it so much. At that point it just hit me like a pile of bricks that I had to break up with her. And already I'm feeling melancholy.
I figured you guys would have some good advice on how to break it as easily as possible to her. More specifically how to keep her from hurting/killing herself because the last thing I ever wanted in life is to be responsible for someone's death. Also if you think you could cheer me up that would be appreciated.
No one I have talked to seems to understand what it's like being in a position where I could cause someone to hurt/kill themselves, but they do all agree I'm doing the right thing in breaking up with her.
Edit: Ok, now I feel kind of like crying, but I'm not sure for what reason.
Second Edit: Now I feel fine and kind of confused.
Third Edit: Btw it's not her putting me in the worrying about her situation, it's just my knowledge of her that worries me.
EDITED_BY: SpinnerofDetroit (1269746864)
Ok, I plan on breaking up with my girlfriend, first girlfriend so this is why I think I need some advice. On Monday I plan on breaking up with her, I would love to get some alone time with her so I could break it to her more politely, but she is being forced to help pack because she is moving (closer to me actually so it's not the reason) and has no free time. But I am afraid she'll hurt herself, or worse. When she broke up with me before, she couldn't stand to be without me and only after an hour she had cut herself. When I found this out, I also learned she and her friend used to do it, she hadn't done it in 2 years, and she has at a time wanted to and almost killed herself before her friend talked her out of it. I'm afraid because I pretty much know she'll end up cutting herself and I'm really afraid of the possibility of her killing herself.
And if you're wondering the reason I want to break up is my feelings for someone else have grown to an enormous extreme (again) and it got to the point where I'm doubting being with her while I'm with her. And lately every night I've been dreaming about being with this other girl, and I realized after fully getting up that this morning for 3 hours I had tried for 3 hours to try and fall asleep to keep dreaming about her because I missed it so much. At that point it just hit me like a pile of bricks that I had to break up with her. And already I'm feeling melancholy.
I figured you guys would have some good advice on how to break it as easily as possible to her. More specifically how to keep her from hurting/killing herself because the last thing I ever wanted in life is to be responsible for someone's death. Also if you think you could cheer me up that would be appreciated.
No one I have talked to seems to understand what it's like being in a position where I could cause someone to hurt/kill themselves, but they do all agree I'm doing the right thing in breaking up with her.
Edit: Ok, now I feel kind of like crying, but I'm not sure for what reason.
Second Edit: Now I feel fine and kind of confused.
Third Edit: Btw it's not her putting me in the worrying about her situation, it's just my knowledge of her that worries me.
EDITED_BY: SpinnerofDetroit (1269746864)
The only luck is bad luck.
Shut up before I stall my poi up your ass 
Stargazer
6,650 posts
6,650 posts
Posted:
sorry for that... and this might actually have been a quite mature decision to take... breaking up with someone you still love I mean...
Do you know the feeling of sitting in front of the greatest gem you ever found... and you're just allergic to diamonds?
...
Two lines that the universe sent me in times of deep hurt was:
"Don't guard your heart - it needs to brake open"
and
"Love is not a feeling - it's a state of mind"
sorry for that... and this might actually have been a quite mature decision to take... breaking up with someone you still love I mean...
Do you know the feeling of sitting in front of the greatest gem you ever found... and you're just allergic to diamonds?
...
Two lines that the universe sent me in times of deep hurt was:
"Don't guard your heart - it needs to brake open"
and
"Love is not a feeling - it's a state of mind"
the best smiles are the ones you lead to 
BRONZE Member
newbie
30 posts
Location: Swindon, Wiltshire, United Kingdom
newbie
30 posts
Location: Swindon, Wiltshire, United Kingdom
Posted:
in my opinion. You only live once.
Every decision might not be the right one but its good at the time - learn from it.
Secondly, you are not leaving ur soon to be ex gf by herself, like ur dumping her and never talking to her and let her know that. DONT visit her, when she txts leave it to 3 txts and reply.. 6 txts and reply. so on and so forth. You cannot cut her out when shes cutting herself!
Thirdly, dont let all of this dwell over you! As ur soon to be ex would say 'cut the skin open and it will bleed for a few mins, after that you will become numb and it will heal'
in my opinion. You only live once.
Every decision might not be the right one but its good at the time - learn from it.
Secondly, you are not leaving ur soon to be ex gf by herself, like ur dumping her and never talking to her and let her know that. DONT visit her, when she txts leave it to 3 txts and reply.. 6 txts and reply. so on and so forth. You cannot cut her out when shes cutting herself!
Thirdly, dont let all of this dwell over you! As ur soon to be ex would say 'cut the skin open and it will bleed for a few mins, after that you will become numb and it will heal'
Poppys will always be close to your heart.
GOLD Member
All High Dude, Ruler of What You Want
2,280 posts
Location: Trenton, MI, USA
All High Dude, Ruler of What You Want
2,280 posts
Location: Trenton, MI, USA
Posted:
Hey thanks poppy. She's finally fine. She never cut herself, but her mom and a couple of her friends want my head on a platter because she ranted about me for a month or so. We're friends now. We even hung out Saturday night, got caught in the rain and walked to our friend's house. By the time we got there I had to get my swagger on to keep my pants up
I don't need any more help in this, I feel I made the right decision. It's not working out with the other girl, that hurt for a long time and still does, poi does help, and as long as I have people around me I stay fine, it's just when I'm left alone for a long time I get kinda bad.
But, if anyone else needs help like the person above in this subject feel free to post here.
Hey thanks poppy. She's finally fine. She never cut herself, but her mom and a couple of her friends want my head on a platter because she ranted about me for a month or so. We're friends now. We even hung out Saturday night, got caught in the rain and walked to our friend's house. By the time we got there I had to get my swagger on to keep my pants up
I don't need any more help in this, I feel I made the right decision. It's not working out with the other girl, that hurt for a long time and still does, poi does help, and as long as I have people around me I stay fine, it's just when I'm left alone for a long time I get kinda bad.But, if anyone else needs help like the person above in this subject feel free to post here.
The only luck is bad luck.
Shut up before I stall my poi up your ass
SILVER Member
Rampant whirler.
2,418 posts
Location: Geelong, Victoria, Australia!
Rampant whirler.
2,418 posts
Location: Geelong, Victoria, Australia!
Posted:
The path to true happiness comes from within, not from the relationships we have. You are already incredibly blessed to be born with the opportunities you have, anything else is an amazing bonus.
The path to true happiness comes from within, not from the relationships we have. You are already incredibly blessed to be born with the opportunities you have, anything else is an amazing bonus.
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