Forums > Social Chat > the offside rule explained (for girls)
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Posted:
THE OFFSIDE RULE EXPLAINED (FOR GIRLS)
You're in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till. Behind the shop
assistant on the till is a pair of Jimmy Choo shoes which you have just
seen and HAVE to have.
The female shopper in front of you has seen them also and is eyeing them
with desire.
Dilemma: Both of you have forgotten your purses.
It would be totally rude to push in front of the first woman if you had
no money to pay for the shoes. The shop assistant remains at the till
waiting. Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of
the shop and sees your dilemma. She prepares to throw (pass) her purse
to you.
If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other
shopper and buy the shoes. At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of
the other shopper and, *whilst it is in flight* you could nip around the
other shopper, catch the purse and buy the shoes.
However until the purse had *actually been thrown* you are not allowed
to move in front of the other shopper - (otherwise you would be
'Offside')...
So. how simple is that?
THE OFFSIDE RULE EXPLAINED (FOR GIRLS)
You're in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till. Behind the shop
assistant on the till is a pair of Jimmy Choo shoes which you have just
seen and HAVE to have.
The female shopper in front of you has seen them also and is eyeing them
with desire.
Dilemma: Both of you have forgotten your purses.
It would be totally rude to push in front of the first woman if you had
no money to pay for the shoes. The shop assistant remains at the till
waiting. Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of
the shop and sees your dilemma. She prepares to throw (pass) her purse
to you.
If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other
shopper and buy the shoes. At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of
the other shopper and, *whilst it is in flight* you could nip around the
other shopper, catch the purse and buy the shoes.
However until the purse had *actually been thrown* you are not allowed
to move in front of the other shopper - (otherwise you would be
'Offside')...
So. how simple is that?
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Posted:
ok, i already knew the ofside rule, but my question has to be *blinks* why?
ok, i already knew the ofside rule, but my question has to be *blinks* why?
"but have you considered there is more to life than your eyelids?"
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Posted:
its a joke
has everyone lost there sense of humour today
it was an email sent to me.
and besides mr majestic did u become a mrs majestic overnight it does say (for girls) on there girls will see the funny side
its a joke
has everyone lost there sense of humour today
it was an email sent to me.
and besides mr majestic did u become a mrs majestic overnight it does say (for girls) on there girls will see the funny side
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Posted:
maybe i did, you'll never know will you
(hehe, you're going to be angry at my post in your other joke thread then
)
why not just post these in an already existing joke thread instead of making two new ones?
maybe i did, you'll never know will you
(hehe, you're going to be angry at my post in your other joke thread then
)why not just post these in an already existing joke thread instead of making two new ones?
"but have you considered there is more to life than your eyelids?"
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Posted:
I'm a guy and it made me giggle
I'm a guy and it made me giggle My ADD makes it so that.....Ooooo SHINY.....wanna go ride bikes....wait....where am I.....
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Posted:
Probably not a good idea to point out the inherent sexism of the joke that it's demeaning to girls when implying that all girls think about is shopping and shoes?
*runs and hides*
Oooh a toffee apple...!
(Just so you know I have no idea what the offside rule is and the joke didn't make it any clearer!)
Probably not a good idea to point out the inherent sexism of the joke that it's demeaning to girls when implying that all girls think about is shopping and shoes?
*runs and hides*
Oooh a toffee apple...!
(Just so you know I have no idea what the offside rule is and the joke didn't make it any clearer!)
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Posted:
*deleted*
sorry bit tired and got wound up
EDITED_BY: dani_babyboo (1148648771)
*deleted*
sorry bit tired and got wound up
EDITED_BY: dani_babyboo (1148648771)
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Posted:
thankyou loki and neon dont worry girls can take jokes ya know lol
thankyou loki and neon dont worry girls can take jokes ya know lol
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Posted:
I think he was asking why such a stupid rule was put in the game in the first place...
Written by: Mr Majestik
ok, i already knew the ofside rule, but my question has to be *blinks* why?
I think he was asking why such a stupid rule was put in the game in the first place...
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Posted:
yer i made a joke back at him with did he become a mrs majestic
yer i made a joke back at him with did he become a mrs majestic
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Posted:
whatever, i just thought the reason for 'joke' threads was to organise jokes into one or tow places and not have billions of threads with one joke each.
fell free to do as you please
whatever, i just thought the reason for 'joke' threads was to organise jokes into one or tow places and not have billions of threads with one joke each.fell free to do as you please
"but have you considered there is more to life than your eyelids?"
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Posted:
well after working 60 hours a week and no day off i have no time to search for actual joke threads i jus thought ppl would have a giggle at a couple of jokes i had by email
well after working 60 hours a week and no day off i have no time to search for actual joke threads i jus thought ppl would have a giggle at a couple of jokes i had by email
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Posted:
sucks to be you. hope you have a weekend worthy of a queen
Written by: dani_babyboo
after working 60 hours a week a
sucks to be you. hope you have a weekend worthy of a queen "but have you considered there is more to life than your eyelids?"
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Posted:
i work the weekends also
run a subway shop on evening shift
so thius lovelly bank holiday weekend is gona be spent till 1am serving customers
i work the weekends also
run a subway shop on evening shift
so thius lovelly bank holiday weekend is gona be spent till 1am serving customers
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Clubbles Jugs
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Posted:
Well, i thought it was funny, but why would you be in a queue without a purse?
I'll have to tell my bird about this one!
Well, i thought it was funny, but why would you be in a queue without a purse?
I'll have to tell my bird about this one!
ah wah wah wah a wah wah
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Posted:
tought break. hope you get more pay on a holiday! dont hate HoP its really friendly, as long as you dont go near the discussion board 
tought break. hope you get more pay on a holiday!
dont hate HoP its really friendly, as long as you dont go near the discussion board "but have you considered there is more to life than your eyelids?"
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Posted:
I know the offside rule and don't like shoes and usually have my purse.
But it was funny
Might forward it to my friend Phil, so that he understands what Corinna and I are on about when the footie's on
I know the offside rule and don't like shoes and usually have my purse.
But it was funny
Might forward it to my friend Phil, so that he understands what Corinna and I are on about when the footie's on
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Posted:
Written by: Mr Majestik
dont hate HoP its really friendly, as long as you dont go near the discussion board
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Posted:
lol i knew the rule before im a huge fan but when ever a guy trys to explain it he does it in football terms a lot of women who arent really into football dont understand but in that way fr a woman who knows exactly what its like to want the last pair of shoes its a good explanation
and very very funny also
lol i knew the rule before im a huge fan but when ever a guy trys to explain it he does it in football terms a lot of women who arent really into football dont understand but in that way fr a woman who knows exactly what its like to want the last pair of shoes its a good explanation
and very very funny also
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Posted:
It's really quite simple, and it stops people goal hanging (waiting too close to the goal for an easy shot), basically if you're closer to the other end of the pitch than their last defender & the ball is passed to you, you're offside. That's it
Written by: Neon_ShaolinWritten by: Mr Majestik
ok, i already knew the ofside rule, but my question has to be *blinks* why?
I think he was asking why such a stupid rule was put in the game in the first place...
It's really quite simple, and it stops people goal hanging (waiting too close to the goal for an easy shot), basically if you're closer to the other end of the pitch than their last defender & the ball is passed to you, you're offside. That's it
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Posted:
I still don't understand. What sport is this? What's a "queue" and a "till." This is all so confusing to me.
I still don't understand. What sport is this? What's a "queue" and a "till." This is all so confusing to me.
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Posted:
It's a rule for when playing Soccer...
Don't worry, I'm British and I still don't fully understand it (I'm getting there though)
It's a rule for when playing Soccer...
Don't worry, I'm British and I still don't fully understand it (I'm getting there though)
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Posted:
Rreminds me of "Bend it like Beckam" where the guy tries to explain the offside rule to his wife using the mustard and mayonnaise bottles
Rreminds me of "Bend it like Beckam" where the guy tries to explain the offside rule to his wife using the mustard and mayonnaise bottles
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You are a pirate!
Yo ho fiddle dee dee, being a pirate is alright to be,
Do what you want coz a pirate is free,
You are a pirate!
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Posted:
I found it funny:) andnow I actualyl understand the offside rule
I found it funny:) andnow I actualyl understand the offside rule
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Posted:
and i'm even more confused, what are you talking about?
and i'm even more confused, what are you talking about?
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Posted:
I have no idea... even after that explanation!! maybe that's because I don't actually know the rules of soccer...
I have no idea... even after that explanation!! maybe that's because I don't actually know the rules of soccer...