Forums > Social Chat > The Official Male HoP Auction!
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Intrepid Penguin
5,635 posts
Location: Australia
Intrepid Penguin
5,635 posts
Location: Australia
Posted:
Step roight up step roight up Lady HoPpers!
Here on the Auction Block today we 'ave two fine Male HoP specimins!
Firstly we 'ave the scrumptious pozee. His interests include poi, staff and firebreathing! His current occupation involves making things explode, and he's 24 years old! Lets face it ladies, this is one hot honey!
Also up for grabs today, is a lushbucket we all know as Raymond Phule! This young stud makes his living by being a Marine, at the tender age of 21! His interests are poi and staff, and he loves a good debate!
Soooooo ladies! step up now, dunt be shy, they wont bite unless you want them too.... what am i bid????
Step roight up step roight up Lady HoPpers!
Here on the Auction Block today we 'ave two fine Male HoP specimins!
Firstly we 'ave the scrumptious pozee. His interests include poi, staff and firebreathing! His current occupation involves making things explode, and he's 24 years old! Lets face it ladies, this is one hot honey!
Also up for grabs today, is a lushbucket we all know as Raymond Phule! This young stud makes his living by being a Marine, at the tender age of 21! His interests are poi and staff, and he loves a good debate!
Soooooo ladies! step up now, dunt be shy, they wont bite unless you want them too.... what am i bid????
Currently on the right side up of the world.
BRONZE Member
Insert Champagne Here
13,215 posts
Location: without class distinction, Australia
Insert Champagne Here
13,215 posts
Location: without class distinction, Australia
Posted:
all these yummy yummy and eligible men to bid for *licks lips*
now there is just far too much competition for mike so i dont think i'll even go there!
MiG, i'll bid NOT fixing my computer
yannicus, if you can give me romantic poetry with a thick french accent (no point saying it in french cos i wouldnt have a clue what you were saying) but i can't beat 100 000 euro!
and Mags looks taken...
all these yummy yummy and eligible men to bid for *licks lips*
now there is just far too much competition for mike so i dont think i'll even go there!
MiG, i'll bid NOT fixing my computer
yannicus, if you can give me romantic poetry with a thick french accent (no point saying it in french cos i wouldnt have a clue what you were saying
) but i can't beat 100 000 euro!and Mags looks taken...
i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey
Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...
SILVER Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
4,172 posts
Location: Hastings, United Kingdom
Carpal \'Tunnel
4,172 posts
Location: Hastings, United Kingdom
Posted:
MiG no need to fix computer anymore. got a brand spanking new one
and with that bid I place a hula skirt, a toffee apple, and a huge box of tim tams
Rouge hes mine
MiG no need to fix computer anymore. got a brand spanking new one
and with that bid I place a hula skirt, a toffee apple, and a huge box of tim tamsRouge hes mine
BRONZE Member
Insert Champagne Here
13,215 posts
Location: without class distinction, Australia
Insert Champagne Here
13,215 posts
Location: without class distinction, Australia
Posted:
well i wasnt going to get into a bidding war over MiG, but if i must, i must...
i'll bid not fixing my computer, and air time at barwon heads airport (my friend did work experience there and had the best time of his life!), and TWO packets of tim tams!
i wont let him go without a fight!
well i wasnt going to get into a bidding war over MiG, but if i must, i must...
i'll bid not fixing my computer, and air time at barwon heads airport (my friend did work experience there and had the best time of his life!), and TWO packets of tim tams!
i wont let him go without a fight!
i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey
Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...
Shoryuken!
233 posts
Location: Hexham, Newcastle, England
233 posts
Location: Hexham, Newcastle, England
Posted:
Shaving your body is in vogue? Ner, it won't last. While it may look nicer, this whole "queer eye" thing, it doesn't trigger raw sexual attraction.
There's never going to be a stage in human development when Sean Conerys James Bond is going to be considered too butch to be attractive.
Oooh as a side note, I have a bi mate who is having trouble finding "straight acting" gay guys, any tips for him anyone?
Shaving your body is in vogue? Ner, it won't last. While it may look nicer, this whole "queer eye" thing, it doesn't trigger raw sexual attraction.
There's never going to be a stage in human development when Sean Conerys James Bond is going to be considered too butch to be attractive.
Oooh as a side note, I have a bi mate who is having trouble finding "straight acting" gay guys, any tips for him anyone?
BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)
Posted:
Woohoo!!!
I got a Jedi!!! Do you do tricks and levitate and stuff?!
Oh wait. Oh no, I don't have a Brewer's Dictionary of Phrase and Fable
Dammit, will you take a Collins Concise English Dictionary and Samuel Beckett's Complete Dramatic Works instead?!!
Lol... and there's nothing wrong with too much porn... unless you (or said girl/boyfriend) starts taking it as gospel.
And, Mr Yannicus, you French-types only go round wooing impressionable young women with your fancy poetry then callously break their hearts... youse are all the same (ooohhhh, bitter, twisted, moi?!)!!
Anyways, so have I got an ado-p too?! For the price of a stuffed monkey?!
Sweet, life is good 
Woohoo!!!
I got a Jedi!!! Do you do tricks and levitate and stuff?!
Oh wait. Oh no, I don't have a Brewer's Dictionary of Phrase and Fable
Dammit, will you take a Collins Concise English Dictionary and Samuel Beckett's Complete Dramatic Works instead?!!
Lol... and there's nothing wrong with too much porn... unless you (or said girl/boyfriend) starts taking it as gospel.
And, Mr Yannicus, you French-types only go round wooing impressionable young women with your fancy poetry then callously break their hearts... youse are all the same (ooohhhh, bitter, twisted, moi?!)!!
Anyways, so have I got an ado-p too?! For the price of a stuffed monkey?!
Sweet, life is good
Getting to the other side 
GOLD Member
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
Posted:
Nah, I mean shaving your "nether regions." I don't get why men do that. Women I don't have an opinion on.
Written by: nilid69
Shaving your body is in vogue? Ner, it won't last. While it may look nicer, this whole "queer eye" thing, it doesn't trigger raw sexual attraction.
Nah, I mean shaving your "nether regions." I don't get why men do that. Women I don't have an opinion on.
-Mike
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella
A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura
SILVER Member
A perth girl gone walkabout...
396 posts
Location: Back home in Perth WA, Australia
A perth girl gone walkabout...
396 posts
Location: Back home in Perth WA, Australia
Posted:
Hee hee, i could give you a really good reason.... altho i'm not sure i should write it here.... especially not with some youngin's reading this board....
So.... who else is still up for grabs.... need myself a fella.... who can i bid for??
Written by: It's...Lightning!
Nah, I mean shaving your "nether regions." I don't get why men do that. Women I don't have an opinion on.
Hee hee, i could give you a really good reason.... altho i'm not sure i should write it here.... especially not with some youngin's reading this board....
So.... who else is still up for grabs.... need myself a fella.... who can i bid for??
I smile because i have no idea whats going on!!
Fireotographer on Hiatus
284 posts
Location: Cork, Ireland
284 posts
Location: Cork, Ireland
Posted:
Hi I am going to bid a complete flame coloring set for Ado-p (that I - by the way - stole from my lab...)
Hi I am going to bid a complete flame coloring set for Ado-p (that I - by the way - stole from my lab...)
"I see," said the blind man.
GOLD Member
Fool
2,020 posts
Location: Cornwall, UK
Fool
2,020 posts
Location: Cornwall, UK
Posted:
*chuckles at Mele* Yeah, that and it feels nice. AT FIRST!
*chuckles at Mele* Yeah, that and it feels nice. AT FIRST!
"I believe the cost of life is Death and we will all pay that in full. Everything else should be a gift. We paid the cover charge of life, we were born."
Bill Hicks, February 1988
GOLD Member
member
169 posts
Location: Paris, France, the armpit of europe
member
169 posts
Location: Paris, France, the armpit of europe
Posted:
this bid is still on? im still sleeping alone? something isn't right in this enterprise.
firepoise, i must admit to being quite shocked by your ethnocentric approach to my frenchness. first, i rarely break hearts, more than often I am the cloven-hearted one. second, i am only half french, the british half of my blood is a very efficient sex repellent. and third, uh, oh yes, its not the poetry that does it, its the pectorals (god bless those maori for inventing poi).
and mrs dragon, forget the 100 000 euro, the poetry session (mm, euphemism) is free if you say please. please say please.
and im sure that shaving the nether regions will make the package look bigger, due to less wrapping, but inevitably isn't worth the itch. i go the conery way and assume my pubescence.
mele, im up for bids, in fact i'll be on the market till the grim one claims my soul, and im sure even after that i'll be on the divine market... god i look foreward to that.
anyway, i tried to get a picture up here but my technical illeteracy has won for tonight.
im drunk and tired and sweating like a fat man on speed in vegas at noon; they said it was monsoon in senegal... where is the rain? i want some tropical rain!!!
Y.
this bid is still on? im still sleeping alone? something isn't right in this enterprise.
firepoise, i must admit to being quite shocked by your ethnocentric approach to my frenchness. first, i rarely break hearts, more than often I am the cloven-hearted one. second, i am only half french, the british half of my blood is a very efficient sex repellent. and third, uh, oh yes, its not the poetry that does it, its the pectorals (god bless those maori for inventing poi).
and mrs dragon, forget the 100 000 euro, the poetry session (mm, euphemism) is free if you say please. please say please.
and im sure that shaving the nether regions will make the package look bigger, due to less wrapping, but inevitably isn't worth the itch. i go the conery way and assume my pubescence.
mele, im up for bids, in fact i'll be on the market till the grim one claims my soul, and im sure even after that i'll be on the divine market... god i look foreward to that.
anyway, i tried to get a picture up here but my technical illeteracy has won for tonight.
im drunk and tired and sweating like a fat man on speed in vegas at noon; they said it was monsoon in senegal... where is the rain? i want some tropical rain!!!
Y.
-Believing that all has been said and done is like mistaking the horizon for the limits of the world. Voltaire.
-Plus je connais hommes, plus j'aime mon chien. Pascal.
GOLD Member
ZORT!
3,045 posts
Location: Brisbane, Australia
ZORT!
3,045 posts
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Posted:
send him over here!
but seriously - it is particularly challenging. ill tell you when i work it out!
Written by:
Oooh as a side note, I have a bi mate who is having trouble finding "straight acting" gay guys, any tips for him anyone?
send him over here!
but seriously - it is particularly challenging. ill tell you when i work it out!
"Here kitty kitty...." - Schroedinger.
BRONZE Member
Insert Champagne Here
13,215 posts
Location: without class distinction, Australia
Insert Champagne Here
13,215 posts
Location: without class distinction, Australia
Posted:
yannicus;
Please
yannicus;
Please
i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey
Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...
BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)
Posted:
Ahem,
Yannicus, my comments were intended in jest, based on my own rather appalling connection to a Frenchman. Sorry if the tone was not apparent over the internet.
He was also only partially French, but he added a bit of Chinese, Laos, Vietnamese and Khmer, which actually worked in compliment to his 'confident' French-ness ()
Why are you in Senegal, if you don't mind me asking? And what's it like? (apart from damn hot)
Sarah, that's a fairly impressive bid, emmm... not sure if I own anything better than that... will think about it (but am not giving up yet)
Ahem,
Yannicus, my comments were intended in jest, based on my own rather appalling connection to a Frenchman. Sorry if the tone was not apparent over the internet.
He was also only partially French, but he added a bit of Chinese, Laos, Vietnamese and Khmer, which actually worked in compliment to his 'confident' French-ness (
)Why are you in Senegal, if you don't mind me asking? And what's it like? (apart from damn hot)
Sarah, that's a fairly impressive bid, emmm... not sure if I own anything better than that... will think about it (but am not giving up yet
) Getting to the other side
BRONZE Member
Insert Champagne Here
13,215 posts
Location: without class distinction, Australia
Insert Champagne Here
13,215 posts
Location: without class distinction, Australia
Posted:
ooh! and who was being sold for a Dictionary of Phrase and Fable? cos i think i have one of them in my library
ooh! and who was being sold for a Dictionary of Phrase and Fable? cos i think i have one of them in my library
i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey
Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...
SILVER Member
A perth girl gone walkabout...
396 posts
Location: Back home in Perth WA, Australia
A perth girl gone walkabout...
396 posts
Location: Back home in Perth WA, Australia
Posted:
Frenchman eh? I'm off to Paris tommorrow so might even be in a place to claim you?!
oooh, what to bid, what to bid? Currently backpacking so nothing to offer other than my womanly wiles (sp?)... will that do?? *nudge nudge* *wink wink*
Written by: yannicus
mele, im up for bids, in fact i'll be on the market till the grim one claims my soul, and im sure even after that i'll be on the divine market...
Frenchman eh? I'm off to Paris tommorrow so might even be in a place to claim you?!
oooh, what to bid, what to bid? Currently backpacking so nothing to offer other than my womanly wiles (sp?)... will that do?? *nudge nudge* *wink wink*
I smile because i have no idea whats going on!!
Fireotographer on Hiatus
284 posts
Location: Cork, Ireland
284 posts
Location: Cork, Ireland
Posted:
That's fine, I was giving it to him anyway... no worries - he likes monkeys
I just bid in return to his bid: half a packet of cookies and a Happy Meal. But I guess I am going for Patrick's foot massage and the maid's uniform instead....
Written by: Firepoise
Sarah, that's a fairly impressive bid, emmm... not sure if I own anything better than that... will think about it (but am not giving up yet
That's fine, I was giving it to him anyway... no worries - he likes monkeys
I just bid in return to his bid: half a packet of cookies and a Happy Meal. But I guess I am going for Patrick's foot massage and the maid's uniform instead....
"I see," said the blind man.
BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)
Posted:
Hmmm, maid's uniform, eh?!
That sounds like a good deal
What's he gonna wear?!
xx
Hmmm, maid's uniform, eh?!
That sounds like a good deal
What's he gonna wear?!
xx
Getting to the other side
Fireotographer on Hiatus
284 posts
Location: Cork, Ireland
284 posts
Location: Cork, Ireland
Posted:
Well.... ? ... Isn't that obvious?
Well.... ? ... Isn't that obvious?
"I see," said the blind man.
BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)
Posted:
hahahaha... does he know about that yet?!
xx
hahahaha... does he know about that yet?!
xx
Getting to the other side
Fireotographer on Hiatus
284 posts
Location: Cork, Ireland
284 posts
Location: Cork, Ireland
Posted:
Do you think I have to force him? He voluntarily bid a footmassage and the costume for me... I don't think he just did it to be charitable...
Do you think I have to force him? He voluntarily bid a footmassage and the costume for me... I don't think he just did it to be charitable...
"I see," said the blind man.
enthusiast
456 posts
Location: Hoboken, New Jersey, USA
456 posts
Location: Hoboken, New Jersey, USA
Posted:
I find shaved "nethers" a huge turnoff. Some instinct causes me to recoil, I suspect because part of my mind reads that as "preadolescent," and automatically (I assure you) cuts off any libido. Ewww, in fact.
I once knew a guy whose hair all fell out when he was four, due to a birth defect. His pubic hair, which hadn't grown in at that point, grew in normally (well, it was a little sparse) when the time came. So he was smooth everywhere, but visibly adult. The lashless eyes were a little disconcerting at first, IIRC.
Have I won the bidding for STB Dr. Mike?
I find shaved "nethers" a huge turnoff. Some instinct causes me to recoil, I suspect because part of my mind reads that as "preadolescent," and automatically (I assure you) cuts off any libido. Ewww, in fact.
I once knew a guy whose hair all fell out when he was four, due to a birth defect. His pubic hair, which hadn't grown in at that point, grew in normally (well, it was a little sparse) when the time came. So he was smooth everywhere, but visibly adult. The lashless eyes were a little disconcerting at first, IIRC.
Have I won the bidding for STB Dr. Mike?
"If you didn't like something the first time, the cud won't be any good either." --Elsie the Cow, Ruminations
GOLD Member
member
169 posts
Location: Paris, France, the armpit of europe
member
169 posts
Location: Paris, France, the armpit of europe
Posted:
mele, womanly wiles are beyond something so shallow as commerce, priceless. i wont be in paris till the 15th of september, hope you'll be there. if not ill make sure to tell you if i go to the uk, we can read some poems, eh? eh? nudge nudge, wink wink, say no more...
miss rouge dragon, dont say please, dont tempt me like this!! i might get frustrated and turn green and huge and fight genetically modified monster dogs... oof this is getting out of hand: but you said please so a kiss for now
firepoise, you were in perfect control of your tone, its mine that was off. i just like sounding like a smart upperclass brit and sometimes i sound snotty. no offence taken, and i hope you took none either. and the french are brutes, its a cold hard fact of nature.
senegal is nice, and humid, but dakar is a bit boring if you dont know anyone: im going to sali, a beach resort, this week so that might be more worthy of a tale. ill post a diary entry in my intro thread later on.
and shame on my fatherland for sprouting the frenchman who hurt you in anyway, un jour il aura son tour.
anyway, if someone can explain how i can put a picture in a message, ill put a pic up for all eyes, in the nude! no, maybe an artistic nude, or more likely a swimsuit pic.
keep the bids rolling, us boys are swelling up inside
mele, womanly wiles are beyond something so shallow as commerce, priceless. i wont be in paris till the 15th of september, hope you'll be there. if not ill make sure to tell you if i go to the uk, we can read some poems, eh? eh? nudge nudge, wink wink, say no more...
miss rouge dragon, dont say please, dont tempt me like this!! i might get frustrated and turn green and huge and fight genetically modified monster dogs... oof this is getting out of hand: but you said please so a kiss for now
firepoise, you were in perfect control of your tone, its mine that was off. i just like sounding like a smart upperclass brit and sometimes i sound snotty. no offence taken, and i hope you took none either. and the french are brutes, its a cold hard fact of nature.
senegal is nice, and humid, but dakar is a bit boring if you dont know anyone: im going to sali, a beach resort, this week so that might be more worthy of a tale. ill post a diary entry in my intro thread later on.
and shame on my fatherland for sprouting the frenchman who hurt you in anyway, un jour il aura son tour.
anyway, if someone can explain how i can put a picture in a message, ill put a pic up for all eyes, in the nude! no, maybe an artistic nude, or more likely a swimsuit pic.
keep the bids rolling, us boys are swelling up inside
-Believing that all has been said and done is like mistaking the horizon for the limits of the world. Voltaire.
-Plus je connais hommes, plus j'aime mon chien. Pascal.
enthusiast
456 posts
Location: Hoboken, New Jersey, USA
456 posts
Location: Hoboken, New Jersey, USA
Posted:
Inside your pants, you mean!
Inside your pants, you mean!
"If you didn't like something the first time, the cud won't be any good either." --Elsie the Cow, Ruminations
Fireotographer on Hiatus
284 posts
Location: Cork, Ireland
284 posts
Location: Cork, Ireland
Posted:
I thought the same.... 
....
I thought the same....
.... "I see," said the blind man.
GOLD Member
member
169 posts
Location: Paris, France, the armpit of europe
member
169 posts
Location: Paris, France, the armpit of europe
Posted:
dirty minded mr clean,
well, the door was wide open, i guess i was just askin for it
dirty minded mr clean,
well, the door was wide open, i guess i was just askin for it
-Believing that all has been said and done is like mistaking the horizon for the limits of the world. Voltaire.
-Plus je connais hommes, plus j'aime mon chien. Pascal.
BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)
Posted:
Lol...
No, no Sarah, I thought you meant he would be wearing the maid's outfit. An interesting image indeed
Certainly no offence taken Mr Yannicus... why do you think it is that French men are so... yep, brutish is a good word?!
And I'm sure he will get his comeuppence one day.
Bise
x
Lol...
No, no Sarah, I thought you meant he would be wearing the maid's outfit. An interesting image indeed
Certainly no offence taken Mr Yannicus... why do you think it is that French men are so... yep, brutish is a good word?!
And I'm sure he will get his comeuppence one day.
Bise
x
Getting to the other side
enthusiast
456 posts
Location: Hoboken, New Jersey, USA
456 posts
Location: Hoboken, New Jersey, USA
Posted:
yannicus, if you're going to say things like "the door was wide open" in this context, you might find out just how dirty my mind really is!
BTW, I understand Mr Clean is sold in France under the name Monsieur Propre. Probably I spelled that wrong.
yannicus, if you're going to say things like "the door was wide open" in this context, you might find out just how dirty my mind really is!
BTW, I understand Mr Clean is sold in France under the name Monsieur Propre. Probably I spelled that wrong.
"If you didn't like something the first time, the cud won't be any good either." --Elsie the Cow, Ruminations
Fireotographer on Hiatus
284 posts
Location: Cork, Ireland
284 posts
Location: Cork, Ireland
Posted:
He was but I told him out of it.... (literally)
Written by: Firepoise
Lol...No, no Sarah, I thought you meant he would be wearing the maid's outfit. An interesting image indeed
He was but I told him out of it.... (literally
) "I see," said the blind man.
BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)
Posted:
lol... aww why?! It would've made such an interesting picture
lol... aww why?! It would've made such an interesting picture
Getting to the other side
Fireotographer on Hiatus
284 posts
Location: Cork, Ireland
284 posts
Location: Cork, Ireland
Posted:
Yeah but I like dressing up... I mean it's so easy: we know that guys love underwear but even more maid's costumes....
Yeah but I like dressing up... I mean it's so easy: we know that guys love underwear but even more maid's costumes....
"I see," said the blind man.
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