Forums > Social Chat > the pass-it-on one-liner joke thread.
Login/Join to Participateno excuses. no apologies.
1,799 posts
Location: aotearoa, New Zealand
so you give the next person a great one-liner to make an awesome punchline with..
they come in and knock 'em dead, and then set up the next poster for an equally witty one-liner thing...
make sense?
anyway (even if you dont. just pretend..)...
what did the barman say when the horse walked into his bar?
those that know, dont say. those that say, dont know.
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
Why the long face...
ummm... i dont know any non dirty jokes...
what did the barman say when the bear walked into the bar, waited, and then asked for a drink...?
The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
with added berries
1,365 posts
Location: Manchester, England (UK)
I don't know?!
Live like there is no tomorrow,
dance like nobody is watching
and hula hoop like wiggling will save the world.
“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
Certainly, but why the long pause/paws
The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
with added berries
1,365 posts
Location: Manchester, England (UK)
urrrrrh!
Live like there is no tomorrow,
dance like nobody is watching
and hula hoop like wiggling will save the world.
“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
is bad innit... ur turn silly
The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
with added berries
1,365 posts
Location: Manchester, England (UK)
errr Whats black, white and red all over?
(there are a few options for this!)
Live like there is no tomorrow,
dance like nobody is watching
and hula hoop like wiggling will save the world.
“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
466 posts
Location: Ft worth Texas
micheal jackson *rrimshot
I got pulled over the ther day and the cop asked "you been drinkin"? and I said......
There are no obstacles only challenges.
Very funny scotty now beam down my pants.
[colour."green"}What would willie do?
AHH theres too many wee leprechauns i cannae squash them all
Watcher of 80s cartoons
665 posts
Location: Chepstow & Bristol, United Kingdom
I'm from Texas aren't I?
What's red and sits in the corner?
>What do you think about the state of the Earth?
>I'm optimistic.
>So why do you look so sad?
>I'm not sure that my optimism is justified.
no excuses. no apologies.
1,799 posts
Location: aotearoa, New Zealand
a cherry that hasnt been "broken"...
2 fishermen are fishing off a bridge. a car drives passed, and the driver shouts out an obscenity about the immorality of fishing off of bridges. around the corner, the car swerves and hits a tree. one of the fishermen says to the other....
those that know, dont say. those that say, dont know.
Watcher of 80s cartoons
665 posts
Location: Chepstow & Bristol, United Kingdom
"...Is that the 23rd or the 24th person we've caught using this method. Quick - let's fillet him before his flesh becomes too tough..."
Why do my socks turn brittle?
>What do you think about the state of the Earth?
>I'm optimistic.
>So why do you look so sad?
>I'm not sure that my optimism is justified.
Pasta of Muppets
2,722 posts
Location: in the interwebs..., United Kingdom
cos theyre made of peanuts...
Why did the Australian cross the road?
ohmygodlaserbeamspewpewpew!
no excuses. no apologies.
1,799 posts
Location: aotearoa, New Zealand
because.. um.. he was a chicken...
how many s&m people does it take to change a lightbulb?
those that know, dont say. those that say, dont know.
Watcher of 80s cartoons
665 posts
Location: Chepstow & Bristol, United Kingdom
Just one, but when I'm master at my very whim I can command a multitude of sub slaves to lie on top of one another in a stair case formation to allow my trainee dom to change the bulb for me. Mwa ha ha ha!!!
Doctor doctor I mistook the chilli oil for lube...
>What do you think about the state of the Earth?
>I'm optimistic.
>So why do you look so sad?
>I'm not sure that my optimism is justified.
water based
5,125 posts
Location: melbourne, Australia
was it hot sex then.
mum, mum, the kids keep calling me a monkey...
"you know there are no trophys for doing silly things in real life yeah pete?" said ant "you wont get a 'listened to ride of the valkyries all the way to vietnam' trophy"
*proud owner of the very cute fire_spinning_angel, birgit and neon shaolin*
Pasta of Muppets
2,722 posts
Location: in the interwebs..., United Kingdom
Thats nice dear, go upstairs and tidy your tyre...
Doctor doctor I dreamt last night I was a tree!
ohmygodlaserbeamspewpewpew!
404 posts
Location: Eindhoven, the Netherlands
did you had moring wood afterwards?
what does it take to make peanut butter?
so you think Im not a newbie? Ok I'll be the King of the newbies. Nucleon the king of all noobs
A Fire Inside
191 posts
Location: portsmouth and sometimes oxford, United Kingdom
lots of big tasty NUTS! SALTY ONES!
What did the monkey say to the hippo?
::: I LiKe pLeAsUrE sPiKeD wItH pAiN - MuSiC iS mY aErOpLaNe :::
no excuses. no apologies.
1,799 posts
Location: aotearoa, New Zealand
who ate all the banana pies..?
whats the difference between an ambulance and an elephant?
those that know, dont say. those that say, dont know.
Pasta of Muppets
2,722 posts
Location: in the interwebs..., United Kingdom
the elephant has red flashing lights...
How many Frenchmen does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
ohmygodlaserbeamspewpewpew!
no excuses. no apologies.
1,799 posts
Location: aotearoa, New Zealand
2 - one to rotate the bulb in and the other to flick the switch to denote nuclear weapons on south pacific attols.
what did the frenchman say to the natives of the islands he blew up?
those that know, dont say. those that say, dont know.
Pasta of Muppets
2,722 posts
Location: in the interwebs..., United Kingdom
Sorry guys, but the we've found a market for coral that glows in the dark...
How many frenchmen does it take the neutralise an unarmed hippy?
ohmygodlaserbeamspewpewpew!
Carpal \'Tunnel
6,942 posts
Location: London, UK
all of them - they need to picekt calais first
how do you get an elephant into your fridge?
back
Pooh-Bah
2,084 posts
Location: melbourne, victoria, australia
in lots and lots of freezer bags
what did George Dubbya say when he stubbed his toe?
404 posts
Location: Eindhoven, the Netherlands
ouch.
what else did he said?
so you think Im not a newbie? Ok I'll be the King of the newbies. Nucleon the king of all noobs
Pasta of Muppets
2,722 posts
Location: in the interwebs..., United Kingdom
Daddy!?
When is a penguin not a penguin?
ohmygodlaserbeamspewpewpew!
1,803 posts
Location: Wonderland igloo, Vic, Australia
when its flying out of your toilet like a raccoon.
hello my dear you are first rate, how about we go on a date?
You're are so fine looking, come sit with me.... (continue)
(dr suess pick up lines!)
.:Pink Exocutioner:.
I am Jack's Raging Bile Duct...
Loving you from the deepest part of my loins.
Member
62 posts
Location: Dublin, Ireland
... and do some cooking?
What's black and white and eats like a horse?
Remember what the doormouse said
i beat my inner child
184 posts
Location: manchester UK
your mum
why did the chicken cross the road?
--the spark what lit the flame which started the fire that burned forever--
Carpal \'Tunnel
6,942 posts
Location: London, UK
because the comedian told it to
why did the comedian tell the chicken to cross the road?
back
Pasta of Muppets
2,722 posts
Location: in the interwebs..., United Kingdom
because he wanted to see its ass...
(He said it was a very good cluck too)
Why did the terrapin cross the road?
ohmygodlaserbeamspewpewpew!
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