If it doesnt hurt anybody...

I have heard many times that people should be allwed to do whatever they want as long as they dont hurt anyone else.

Do you honestly feel this way? If so why?

To me, if your hurting yourself, then it is not okay.

yes and no, i say it alot, especially as far as drugs go, yes i think let ppl do what they want if it isnt someone i care deeply for, no if it is, if its someone i care deeply for i do my best to explain the damage they are doing to themselves. if after all that they choose to do it anyway there is nothing else that i can do as it is their life

i look at it like if someone told me how dangerous fire twirling was i wouldnt stop because i feel safe doing it, i would listen to what they have to say but ultimately thats my choice in the same way that what other ppl do is their choice.

yes but what ever someone does there is always someone thats loves them that will be hurt from it.
If someone starts taking drugs then if they get into it bad they will prolly go round stealing from the people they live with friends, family, people that dont even know... what ever someone does imho will always hurt someone else.

that's too vague a statement if ya ask me

there's consequences to consider - possibly long reaching - which may not be immediately obvious when something "doesn't hurt anyone else" right away

the drug-based examples above are good examples of this

people also say something like "What they don't know wont hurt them" So.. if you do something bad or stupid and NOONE knows or notice -and never will.. is that ok?

We can never know the full extent of our actions...We can feel we understand SOME of them, but there is no real way of knowing how far they can reach.

In general, hurt doesn't stay put. Just like a laugh or smile brightens up other people, so pain and suffering also affects other people. whether first hand, or reading about it in the paper etc etc.

The whole concept to me of "I'm only hurting myself" is not only weak minded and a sad rationale, but it is completely and utterly wrong.

There's enough bad stuff in this world that has nothing to do with personal decisions, why the hell shoudl we add even one second of extra crap to it?


Maybe a little off-topic, but the way I try to live my life is not to do anything I wouldn't want everyone else in the world to know about. I aspire to this notion, and am nowhere near achieving it as agoal, yet I am happy with the small changes that have occurred so far.

If you do something that hurts you and only you, would you be comfortable with everyone in the world knowing what you did? No, you wouldn't because no matter what anyone says in words, what other people think is very important to everyone (in my opinion).

A friend of mine at Uni, said he didn't care what other people thought, and refused point blank to purchase the Cranberries current album because everyone else had bought it.

I tried to explain to him, that he was STILL being influenced by everyone else, he just chose a negative rather than positive reaction to it. We talked about this at length and I found out he actually liked the music and felt trapped because he shouldn't buy it as it was popular?

Nuts! But very very common in lesser or greater degrees.

The "I'm only hurting myself" notion is one of the strongest degrees of this. The mere fact that this type of arguement is used instead of "NOONE IS GETTING HURT" shows that they aren't happy about in themselves but are choosing indignity at societies attempts to help, rather than admit the truth.

I have no doubt people will try to argue against what I have just said...likely with the very indignity I just mentioned.

In my opinion, we should all strive to lead a 'good' life, and an course of action that takes us away form we consider, as individuals, to be good, is harmful to us and to those we interact with.

In my opinion, of course...

Drugs have been a positive influence on my life both as a tool and as a source of enjoyment and while there have been times when they've caused a negative effect those times are far outweighed by the positive. And at the end of the day there are very few decisions and acts in life in which there are no negative consequences at all and we simply have to consider and weigh the costs and benefits, and for me the benefits of drugs outweighs the costs.

*beams at Charles who's just spoken more sense than he's used to Ever hearing from other people*

HEAR BLOODY HEAR

i try and live my life as an open book because of this - if you're doing something you're ashamed of it's probably 'cos it's wrong.

there's afedavits to that though - eg. there are a lot of people who'd want me to feel ashamed for being gay or that doing anythign about it is a sin - this is just nonsense and has to be got past

so you gotta examine what you're ashamed of - what things you have to hide - and ask why

and in the end you can end up with a life that you Know will not harm others - that you know you can go through life in a graceful arc and only do good or at least try and only leave things better than you found them

to my mind a far better philosophy to live by than many others including "if it doesn't hurt anybody..."

I will not argue against your opinion, charles. It makes sence

quote:

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In my opininon, we should all strive to lead a 'good' life, and an course of action that takes us away fromm we consider, as individuals, to be good, is harmful to us and those we interact with

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Yes..

Hmm. I've had people tell me that what they're doing doesn't hurt anyone as a justification for their behaviour. But there's a big difference between knowing this and thinking it. If you know it, do it. But you may think you know without knowing the truth.

If you use drugs it may not hurt anyone where you are, but unless you know exactly where the drugs come from you don't know who has been hurt in order to provide you with them.

(I'm the last person to lecture anyone about drugs, but it is a good example of what I'm trying to say.)

The same could be said about the bread you're eating, or the coffee you drink....

tis one reason why i wish they'd legalise weed though - so i could know where the money goes

atm i sorta know... it's going to a family who support themselves with a small farm that'll do nicely! almost feels like a good cause lol

There have been some good points made, and in life you should definatley try and spread a little sunshine (god I sound like a hippy ) and think about the local and global consequences of your actions. Think globally, act locally. Set by example.

But you also shouldn't get yourself in a situation where you are hurt by others action, or hurt others by your actions. This is not so much achieved by what you do, but by educating those around you, and making sure you understand all aspects of something before making a wroght iron descission on it.

Hrm... Ill keep my coments to myself for a little while longer.

There's also the whole idea of physicaly hurting someone or mentally, emotionaly hurting someone. Even though there's several ways to hurt someone/yourself, they unfortunately seem to come hand in hand.
I have several close friends who purposely hurt themselves out of depression, so whilst they're physically hurting themselves, they're emotionaly hurting everyone who cares about them.
I'm the kind of person who stand to see anyone get hurt, so even if there's a complete stranger hurting themselves or others I feel like I can't just stand by, like I just can'tignore it.
In wicca, one of the biggest rules to follow is "An it harm none, do what thou wilt"
I personaly think that oneself should be included in the whole "none" bit.

This is an interesting one.

In essence I agree.
However nothing in life is simple, and as we are creatures involved in a complex web of social interaction almost everything we do afects someone else. Careful thought must be given when using this statement.

Also I note that it's interesting to look into the implications of the other way to state this: "Don't do anything that hurts others". This is unattainable as a constant rule for life. Throughout our life we will hurt people, there's no way to avoid it.

In the end I reckon you've got to try to strike the impossible balance between what's good for you and those around you, and what's bad for you and those around you.

I have to agree with many things said here and yet one thing comes to my mind :
you are not always responsible for hurting others if you are being true to your heart.

for example being gay and coming out peacefully in order to live your life in all honesty might hurt annoy chock others but i do not think one should not live the way their heart whispers because one carries all the wieght of other people s issues.

same went for me for the past 28 years trying to please so many people and not always following my heart. I have finally dcided to live my life and be happy and allthough it has not been easy for everyone to accept it and first maybe hurt them I am glad I tookl that decision. those turning their back on me in pain are probably people who have their own issues and are projecting stuff on me and I cannot be held reponsible for it.

I think one has to be truthfull and rather than saying to never hurt anyone I think above all I value people being RESPONSIBLE for their acts...

tht being said I wish noone hurt or pain or sadness and do my best to make others smile and bubble with laughter

shine on
cass

My view is that as long as you aren't demonstrably hurting someone else, and as long as you are of sound mind, then what you do with yourself is your own business.

I think it's VERY dangerous to start traveling down the road of telling people what they can and can't do alone behind closed doors. And it's a road that the Right in the U.S. seems to keep wanting to go down.

If you are just being you, yet you still hurt someone (no intentions to hurt someone at all), is that their fault or yours?