Nutella/Marmite/vegemite explained.

i kinda feel bad about making this post but i looked for an answer, and i loked for another place to ask this but nothign seemed right.

with the whole nutella/marmite/vegemite dialectic i cannot understand why nutella is and option. ive had nutella and vegemite and heard marmite is much like vegemite. while nutella is sweet and chocolate the others are salty and seem unrelated.

i also heard that vegemite is not vegetarian(or possibly vegan) is marmite the vegetarian(or possibly vegan) substitution?

Promite?

Again i appoligize for maing this thread seeing as im sure there are tons of threads on this but it didnt seem to fit. thanks everyone.

Awesome thread.


I shall attempt to explain;
Its kind of a really old skool (4+ years ago now) in-joke, mainly brought about by Cassandra (miss you babe if you read this!).

As im sure you have seen in the searching for posts on this, the were people who were hetro-spreadable, bi-spreadable and even tri-spreadable, in reagrds to vegemite/ marmite/ nutella.

People used to discuss/ chat/ bitch/ argue/ fight about which was best and people mainly lived peacefully.
Unfortunalty, things came to a nasty head in the "Condiment choice carnage clash of '03" where well over 5000 peices of toast lost their crumbs after being thrown by opposing sides, trying to lure the combatants to "the other side" (depending on your condiment of choice of course).

Then, in the Autumn of 2003, the unspeakable happened. A member of the Leigion of Nutella was virtually killed on the forum by another member of the Marmite Alliance with a frozen load of marmite, sharpened into a point. The 5000 pieces of toast loosing their virtual lives was bad enough, but when a member of the board lost their virtual life and was forced to re-register, Malcolm said enough was enough and placed a carpet ban on the toast wars/ speaking of condiments in order to calm everyone down.

Members were now banned from referencing to, or mentioning
any or the banned breakfast spreads. This worked as planned, and soon everyone was happy enough just to sit there discussing what music they spin to, how to make sparkly poi as well as how to change the colour of fire. Sometimes they even asked each other if they prefered "X" or "X^1".

After about a year, when Malcolm was sure nothing would kick off again with regards to the banned spreads, he got Doc Lightning to produce a standard "introduction thread template" in which the new member of the board was asked to say which of Marmite, Vegemite or Nutella they preferred. This question was included so the member could be "placed in boxes" (I see a boundry, I eat a boundry and wash it down with a hot steaming cup of rules) and categorised. It is scientific fact that Marmite lovers would kick off violence first (due to the excess of Vitamin B contained in the marmite), that the Nutella supporters as generally docile due to the "aaaaaaaaaaah" and "mmmmmmm" factors of Nutella. Malcolm wanted to find these marmite eating trouble makers and keep an eye on them as soon as possible.

And peaceful it has remained until this day. There is a small group of people who have joined together in secret, ready to step in and defend the peace, should the Breakfast spread battle start ever again, but we arent allowed to talk about them.

*Aims a Nutella cannon at Jonny UCOF*

It's LIES!!! ALL LIES, I SAY!!!!

*pulls the trigger*

Oi!
Thats friendly fire!
Im on your team!

You could have aimed for my mouth at least... (umm.. erm.. you know what I mean )

Ah, Jonny, I wish you were "on my team."

*cough*

ok...soo....that makes sence...i guess

all three are "breakfast" spreads huh? good to know, ive been eating nutella the wrong way.

what about marmite and vegemite? whats the difference and is one vegitarian or vegan and one not?
or does marmite just have mroe vit b?

very interesting. maybe thats why i didnt like vegemite. i never knew about the brewing aspect but i think Fosters (only Oz beer ive had) is Australian for piss.

i tihnk ill give marmite a go....if i ever happen upon it. thanks for the info you endless abyss of usefull information.

mmmmm, you seem to know a lot about *mite for someone who claims to be in the nutella camp

Poje... I hate to be the one to tell you, but Fosters is about as Australian as penguins are Jewish.
Its all just a clever marketing ploy

Yakumo: Know your enemy.

*Gets to work on a pic of a penguin in full Hassidic Rabbi gear...*

P.S. Marmite AND Nutella. Not both at once. Yet...

Mmmm... Nutella.

did you know if you stir marmite for long enough it turns white?!

hmmm....good question.... i just found two tubs in the cupboard dated march 04 and october 04, they both look fine, and i think they smell fine, i hate the smell of marmite so i cant be sure, and im certainly not taste testing it. perhaps ill ask somone else to do it?

but there you quite possibly 3 year old marmite still going strong.
anyone got anything older?

Jon, thank you for being so patient and explaining everything fully. As well as giving me another reason to not like Marmite/vegimite/promite.
As I said in another thread, you are perfect at being you

Jonny!! I haven't laughed at a thread so much for ages!!

P.S- Nutella rules, marmite/vegemite drools.

Peanut butter ftw.

i think they add stuff to Marmite to give it a "distinctive flavour"

why can't nutella, Marmite/Vegemite, peanut butter all live together happily?
they all go together.
(maybe its best not to answer, for the sake of no arguments)

ooopppss...should read the whole thread before posting. Wow, now I know all about vegemite.

Fosters is like Jewish peguin piss. (Do penguins pee)

Im going to join Polarity in the peanut butter splinter group
.
I was originally in the Nutella clan, but only after the most of the events listed above occured
(I wandered around the desolate landscape, levelled by blasts of Yeasty stuff and fake praline, muttering "What happened here?". A certain Mr only-likes-to-be-known-by-his-initials-and-keeps-changing-his-name-every-so-often wandered up, wearing naught but a pair of orange trousers, and proclaimed "Here once lay the city of Wah-Shing-Ton.")

However, the rediscovery of Crunchy Peanut Butter has led to my having Sun Pat for my main course, and Nutella for dessert.

Heresy, you say? Then I say you are all heretics!

*runs behind Polarity knowing Sake and pretty lights will halt the hippies*

I've just been reading up on Marmite and ALL it's yeast is sourced from breweries and it has the approval of the Vegetarian Society. The history of Vegemite makes NO mention of being a vege' alternative to Marmite. So, references for your theory please George. Marmite in NZ has a few different ingredients and this is probably why it tastes better . For a really awesome taste sensation try honey AND marmite on buttered toast (NB: the marmite to honey ratio is tricky to get right so have a hungry canine, goat or flatmate on hand to consume the failed experiments).

Enough of this, I'm off for a nice blackcurrant jam sandwich...

the reference is my mother and she would never be wrong!

She might never be wrong, but she's maybe getting confused with Bovril, which used to be meaty (the stuff they take out of corned beef, except they were taking bovril out first and then had corned beef left which they only later discovered they could sell to maiden aunts to foist upon their unsuspecting relatives when they visited for Sunday tea). Bovril's been veggie for a while, but I heard lately that there'll be beef in it again soon/now.

As far as P-B is concerned, sun pat is a nestlé product and so therefore evil.

(And marmite/P-B combinations are the best taste sensation ever to get put on toast (though, to be fair, I've not tried the marmite/honey combo, nor the marmite/nutella variants suggested in this thread. Marmite/vegemite would just be silly)

My jar of marmite says January 05 on it, so it's a relative youngster, but still fine...

You sucked in foreigners who think we actually drink Fosters

Fosters: Australian for "Camel Piss"