Forums > Social Chat > The Lesson of the Cows. (For Glass)
Login/Join to Participate9,232 posts
Location: NYC, NY, USA
I'm only posting this because it will make Glass happy and he's been so hospitable to me, in fact, I'm currently in his living room typing this as he's asleep... But it does have a really good lesson. I originally heard it in the old skool gangsta movie 'Colors' and it's better told than read (sorry for the language but it doesn't work without it). Here goes:
*****
There are two Bulls, a small bull and a big bull, standing on top of a large hilltop looking down at a field of cows.
The smaller bull looks up at the bigger bull and says "Hey... Let's run down the hill and f*ck one of those cows!"
The big bull looks down and calmly says "Naaa, let's WALK down the hill and f*ck ALL the cows."
*****
Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]
still can't believe it's not butter
6,978 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia
NYC, i dunno how to say this mate but.. i have never really asked any faavours of you before, and i was wondering if you could please wet-willie glass whilst he's in a vulnerable sleepy state. I'm sure there'll never be a better chance.
I like the internet
:mua ha ha ha ha:
Laugh Often, Smile Much, Post lolcats Always
Carpal \'Tunnel
6,207 posts
Location: "In your ear", United Kingdom
Step (el-nombrie)
Corporate Circus Arts Entertainer
3,989 posts
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
I don't know whether to be offended or laugh...I think i will get in trouble no matter what I do...
Oh well, if i'm going to get in trouble, lets make it worthwhile...
NYC, before you wet Glass, could you draw his name backwards on his forehead with a permanent marker (so he can see it in the mirror).
HoP Posting Guidelines
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Intrepid Penguin
5,635 posts
Location: Australia
pssst, NYC, honey, can you just paint his eyebrows with green and pink food colouring for me too? is that cool? ta!
xoxoxoxxo
Glass, hehe we love you!
Currently on the right side up of the world.
ZORT!
3,045 posts
Location: Brisbane, Australia
and if you invite mech over, he'd give glass a double wet willie AND a wedgie.
"Here kitty kitty...." - Schroedinger.
Carpal \'Tunnel
6,207 posts
Location: "In your ear", United Kingdom
put his hand in water HEHEHEHEHEHE!
or put a rizzla on his lips and light it!
Step (el-nombrie)
still can't believe it's not butter
6,978 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia
quote:..and THAt, ladies and germs, is what i call dexterity!
Originally posted by Dentrassi:
and if you invite mech over, he'd give glass a double wet willie AND a wedgie.
Laugh Often, Smile Much, Post lolcats Always
The Ministry of Manipulation
2,523 posts
Location: Bristol, United Kingdom
screw y'all
I thought you were my firends
and what is a wet willie?
Confused in london
its morning here now, I'm up and working
NYC still asleep, what is it you would like me to do to him?
(nyc is the EJC little bull, he runs down the hill to hug one of the cows, watch me mosie along behind and hug all of the cows. )
word
A wet willie is a very damp orca!
still can't believe it's not butter
6,978 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia
oh dear... it seems that the tables be turned.
only one thing to do now... BAIL!
:exits with great haste, thus avoiding all responsibility:
Laugh Often, Smile Much, Post lolcats Always
940 posts
A wet willie, for you foreigners out there , is when you lick your finger and then wiggle it around in someone's ear.
E pluribus unum, baby.
55 posts
Location: London
Ahhhhh, the thoughts that came into my head when i thought (edited to say NYC) was gonna make Drews' willie wet....
EDITED_BY: Charles (1094114923)
I don't rebel against the system, I created it for the misery of others.
Carpal \'Tunnel
6,207 posts
Location: "In your ear", United Kingdom
now, now behave!
if you wanna be mean let him sleep and then shout FIRE FIRE FIRE in his ear and shake his while use something to make a burning smell, and watch him pee himself!
Step (el-nombrie)
9,232 posts
Location: NYC, NY, USA
<-- Killjoy.
Um... any way we could delete my name off the thread? My kids will be back in September and will be surfing the net soon enough... thanks!
Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]
2,364 posts
Location: austin,tx
besides yelling fire would just get him excited and he'd jump up to see who was spinning!
-Such a price the gods exact for song: to become what we sing
-Seek freedom and become captive of your desires. Seek discipline and find your liberty.
-When the center of the storm does not move, you are in its path.
3,638 posts
Location: Brum / Dorset / Fairy Land
Geologists do it in the dirt................ 
9,232 posts
Location: NYC, NY, USA
Wait... what? Why bump up a year old post? And such a random one at that?
And for the record, this year at EJC... I took it easy and wasn't as much of a spaz as I've been in years past.
Won't comment on any other aspect of the experience out of respect for those involved. Except to say that there were no cows involved. Since we camped next to HORSES.
How funny of you to bump this up my strange fairy friend....
Please explain.
Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]
2,354 posts
Location: Away from home
not even silent cows NYC?
:moo:
57 posts
Location: PETERBOROUGH
i like cows, theyre cool , i got chrged at by abull once, i can assure you , he RAN down the hill lol
just me, my lighter and a lifes supply of paraffin
Corporate Circus Arts Entertainer
3,989 posts
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
I thought it was bumped so I could edit NYC's name out of the thread (which I've just done, 1 year late)
HoP Posting Guidelines
* Is it the Truth?
* Is it Fair to all concerned?
* Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
* Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?
3,638 posts
Location: Brum / Dorset / Fairy Land
I was looking for something and I thought it was so very funny I felled off my fairy chair.
Geologists do it in the dirt................
231 posts
Location: table in front of the pc.
Bumping is good.
yay for the bumper!
I have my sidekick now. I think I call him Sidekick!!
"Lets get Jinky with it!"
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