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Posted:So I just got my fire Poi in the mail a week ago. I swore I was not going to lite them up for 4-6 months...... That didn't work. I only did very basic moves with them, only things I was comfortable with... Yes it was just circles and yes the roar of the fire is intimidating. So someone asked me today, what are you going to do when your son plays with fire? How are you going to approach that one?

And my heart stopped. What AM I going to do when/if my son plays with fire, lighters etc? I cant say I'm a professional, I'm not by far. I can say "Well honey Mommy is not playing with a full deck of cards and wouldnt you rather be smarter then Mommy." biggrin

So for any moms on the boards or anyone else, what have you said to kids about playing with fire? What advice can you give parents on the boards? What experiences have you had as a parent dealing with your kids and fire?


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TribalBeatsSioux
SILVER Member since Sep 2007

TribalBeatsSioux

member
Location: Cypress, Ca, USA

Total posts: 72
Posted: Written by: AnueBunnie


I can say "Well honey Mommy is not playing with a full deck of cards and wouldnt you rather be smarter then Mommy." biggrin




LOL, I almost spat my lunch out on thr work monitor when I read that ubbloco


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Posted:ubblol Yes! I can make someone almost snarf their lunch on the computer! On a serious note, you didnt choke at all did you?

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Pele
BRONZE Member since Dec 2000

Pele

the henna lady
Location: WNY, USA

Total posts: 6193
Posted:Well, that's one approach! lol

My son was brought up with it. He was spinning poi and staff when he was about 4. Now he's 12 and could care less.

He, however, was there every time I went through safety with someone. I made sure of it. I drilled into his head *every single time* he was around fire (of any sorts) the safety measures.

He's known since he was a tot that fire burns and hurts, he used to blow out my candles and then for a spell the pilot light on our gas stove (a whole nother issue, mind you). So it wasn't so much the dangers that I worked hard to instill in him. More, that you have to be careful and safe, and how to be.

And he knows more than anyone that no matter how safe you are, fire is still dangerous. We lost part of our home to fire when he was 6 (no, my practicing had nothing to do with it!) and he was there the day of my accident. Not that I recommend you do any of that (NO! eek ) but he was well informed priorly.

As for when he wants to. He doesn't so far. He likes to play with the flaming sticks from a campfire but knows not to swing them around or take them far but that's it. He's seen me do it so many times that he's bored by it and likes to persue his own interests.

And, interestingly, he's still thinking of being a fireman when he grows up.

So yeah, the long and short, be open and honest and focus on safety more than danger would be my experience and advise...but I only have one whose grown up with it so someone else's experience may be different.

Hope this helps! smile


Pele
Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir
"Oooh look! A pub!" -exclaimed after recovering from a stupid fall
"And for the decadence of art, nothing beats a roaring fire." -TMK

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TribalBeatsSioux
SILVER Member since Sep 2007

TribalBeatsSioux

member
Location: Cypress, Ca, USA

Total posts: 72
Posted: Written by: AnueBunnie


ubblol Yes! I can make someone almost snarf their lunch on the computer! On a serious note, you didnt choke at all did you?



No, I did not choke. I am fine. Just wishing I had more ime to practice right now weavesmiley


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Posted: Written by: Pele





And he knows more than anyone that no matter how safe you are, fire is still dangerous. We lost part of our home to fire when he was 6 (no, my practicing had nothing to do with it!) and he was there the day of my accident. Not that I recommend you do any of that (NO! eek ) but he was well informed priorly.









I didnt know he witnessed it. I watched your video and it helped me decide that I didnt want to do fire breathing. I didnt like the risks involved on that. Although swinging fire has its own set of risks, I prefer that over breathing fire.



Thanks for the information, this actually does help.



Pele I sent you a PM so we could stop clogging someones thread LOL.

EDITED_BY: AnueBunnie (1190923023)


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Fire_Moose
SILVER Member since May 2007

Fire_Moose

Elusive and Bearded
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, USA

Total posts: 3597
Posted:Im with Pele, I think most kids will play with fire at some point in there life (we just never grew out of it). If a child grows up whos parents spin i think the whole safety thing will just work it self in. Unless of course yer an unsafe spinner in which case dont have kids....or play with fire.

 Written by: AnueBunnie


So I just got my fire Poi in the mail a week ago. I swore I was not going to lite them up for 4-6 months...... That didn't work.



Once that wick is available to you its just SOOOO hard to resist huh? my first burn was like a month after i started staff and consisted of ronsonol and extremly short burns....good times


O.B.E.S.E.

Owned by Mynci!

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Posted:You know Poje, your right! I thought I was going to be able to resist it, but you know what I couldnt.

Maybe is was the boyfriend egging me on, or my mother saying "DO IT, Do it!" I mean the only sensible person who didnt want me to lite them up was my father and that was because he was burned in Vietnam! 2 against 1, I went for it. My father God Bless him watched even though it was hard for him.

But this is getting off subject which I am great at LOL


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Eera
BRONZE Member since May 2003

old hand
Location: In a test pit, Mackay, Austral...

Total posts: 1107
Posted:It's like sex edu; the more they know the less likely they screw it up.

I was always told "keep away from fire, it'll hurt you." Then when I was 8 I burned down the shed. I've figured since then that the kids are going to find your matches, and supervised pyromania is a way better thing


There is a slight possibility that I am not actually right all of the time.

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Doc Lightning
GOLD Member since May 2001

Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

Total posts: 13920
Posted:I was a kid when my dad taught me to build fires in the fireplace. Humans have been using fire for...well...longer than there have been humans.

What has our civilization come to when people are worried that exposing children to fire will be harmful? It is perhaps the greatest scientific discovery ever. The advent of fire marked two very significant milestones in human history: it was the first time homonids ever controlled a chemical reaction and it was also the first time hominids ever exerted any control over one of the four fundamental quantum forces: electromagnetism. Of course we had no such idea...

You teach children about fire, you teach them to respect it and to use it wisely. You teach them that it can be an amazing tool and a thing of beauty. And you teach them that it can be a source of terrible suffering, like all useful things.


-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

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Rouge Dragon
BRONZE Member since Jul 2003

Rouge Dragon

Insert Champagne Here
Location: without class distinction, Aus...

Total posts: 13215
Posted:I think that the sooner you teach kids to be responsible with fire the better.

It's like alcohol. If you tell them it's all bad and don't set a good example then as soon as they get the chance they'll start to abuse it. But if you teach them that it's something that can be used correctly then they're less likely to run off an abuse it at the nearest opportunity.


i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey

Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...

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Gnor
BRONZE Member since Mar 2003

Gnor

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Perth, Australia

Total posts: 5814
Posted:Fire gives light , warmth and is a tool.

Kids love baths by candlight


Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?

Im in a lonely battle with the world with a fish to match the chip on my shoulder. Gnu in Binnu in a cnu

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beachburn
BRONZE Member since Sep 2007

newbie
Location: , USA

Total posts: 1
Posted:teach em how to use it - we all play with matches, flares, and the fire pit (under my partners and my close supervision) on a regular basis. Both kids have had access to practice poi sets since they were 4 and 6, the rule being that they are not allowed to light them until they stop whacking themselves or their sibling - they still haven't got them lit. smile They are 6 and 8 now.

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Kathain_Bowen


Kathain_Bowen

Good Ol' Yarn For Hair
Location: Atlanta, GA, USA

Total posts: 422
Posted: Written by: AnueBunnie

So for any moms on the boards or anyone else, what have you said to kids about playing with fire? What advice can you give parents on the boards? What experiences have you had as a parent dealing with your kids and fire?



... while I don't have children around fire, I once had a very insightful chat with my riding instructor. See, over the course of twenty years of having a competitive training barn, he's started HUNDREDS of children riding and show jumping. If you're not familiar with the sport, let me put it as a friend once so eloquently observed.

"You are ALL out of your friggin' minds!"

Anywho, when I asked his opinions of starting children riding, he was rather frank with me. He said that he never even considered starting a child under the age of ten. He said that, under the age of ten, it was likely that, should something happen, the child wouldn't want to continue with training and would quickly just become terrified of riding. After that, he said that you had to play it by ear, student by student, based off of their individual skill, strengths, weaknesses, and personality. Some students were cautious and timid, needing prodding to really push themselves. Other students were too brave, charging at fences at dangerous speeds, needing to be reined in themselves. His teaching always had a formula to it, but, for each student, he changed things up to suit their needs. It was also introduced to every student that his word was law at the farm, beyond question, which kept all the kinds, both timid and brash, in line with what they did, even when hacking on the trails unsupervised. And, despite all that, he was fun, friendly, and rather lighthearted.

I'm very thankful my cousins (12 and 10- utterly adorable but uber competitive with one another) have never expressed any interest in fire or poi. However, if they did, I would set the same tone with them, probably use the same rules.



.... by the by.... if you're curious.... this is how dangerous of a sport we're talking about with show jumping. I found this on Youtube while hunting for an interview of a jockey friend. Not a bloody video, but definitely not a video for the squeamish at heart at some points.




"So long and thanks for all the fish."

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Fire_Moose
SILVER Member since May 2007

Fire_Moose

Elusive and Bearded
Location: Scottsdale, AZ, USA

Total posts: 3597
Posted:Lol, good video.

offtopic Reminds me of the first time i got on a horse, i put one foot in and was about to throw myself over to the other side, then she reared up and i held on for a little bit(didnt know proper procedure) i finally let go and she fell backwards onto a cactus, whoops.


O.B.E.S.E.

Owned by Mynci!

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PK_
BRONZE Member since Dec 2001

PK_

Lambretta Fanatic
Location: , United Kingdom

Total posts: 4993
Posted:Speaking of dangerous sports....



Power Kiting shouldn't be taken likely with children either.. not when...








Can happen.



rolleyes



Roll on tomorrow when i can go flying again ubbrollsmile


PK.

"To be an angel, one need not have wings.
In giving love there is an equal grace.
Nor need one seek the aura in the face,
As love unveils the beauty of all things."

*Francois Couperin.

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natasqi


natasqi

addict
Location: Perth

Total posts: 489
Posted:Lol, this has gotten rapidly off topic.

This is more a note for people with kids.. even if they don't spin themselves.

I think there should be a 2m, don't come near me barrier. And many kids don't get taught this.

I've been spinning with poi (which don't fly out of your hands) and had children (of people who spin and others who don't) stand less than a metre from me and I've freaked out and had to hit myself to avoid them.

To go with the horse theme above. first thing you're taught is NEVER approach a horse fomr behind and NEVER stand behind a horse you don't intimately know.

NEVER approach a firedancer (even if they're not playing with fire) from behind, NEVER get to close to them.

Another time I was practicing with my chucks. and I'm not that good. I still drop them. a lot. and they fly out of my hands... And usually I stand v far away from everyone else FOR A REASON!

And then people (even above 18yr olds) come and stand within a metre of me and don't heed my warnings.

So, Yes, there are fire safety concerns, but also space concerns.

It's like putting up barriers at your fireshows. Surely getting hit with burning objects and getting set on fire is enough of a deterant to not come to close.

*despairs at the stupidity of people as a collective*

My frustration at this situation has led me to sometimes, after warnings, think "if they get hit, it's totally their fault" which I'm sure my insurance company doesn't want to hear...


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PK_
BRONZE Member since Dec 2001

PK_

Lambretta Fanatic
Location: , United Kingdom

Total posts: 4993
Posted: Written by: natasqi

Surely getting hit with burning objects and getting set on fire is enough of a deterant to not come to close.




You'd think so wouldn't you. rolleyes


PK.

"To be an angel, one need not have wings.
In giving love there is an equal grace.
Nor need one seek the aura in the face,
As love unveils the beauty of all things."

*Francois Couperin.

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Kathain_Bowen


Kathain_Bowen

Good Ol' Yarn For Hair
Location: Atlanta, GA, USA

Total posts: 422
Posted: Written by: PK_


 Written by: natasqi

Surely getting hit with burning objects and getting set on fire is enough of a deterant to not come to close.




You'd think so wouldn't you. rolleyes



People are like moths. They HAVE to get closer to fire. ubbrollsmile


"So long and thanks for all the fish."

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PK_
BRONZE Member since Dec 2001

PK_

Lambretta Fanatic
Location: , United Kingdom

Total posts: 4993
Posted:I'm a Moth... Pele is a fire rolleyes ubblove







offtopic and awaiting spankings.


PK.

"To be an angel, one need not have wings.
In giving love there is an equal grace.
Nor need one seek the aura in the face,
As love unveils the beauty of all things."

*Francois Couperin.

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faith enfire
BRONZE Member since Jan 2006

faith enfire

wandering thru the woods of WI
Location: Wisconsin, USA

Total posts: 3556
Posted:There is a buskerfest that I'm trying to get into on one of our area bar streets, but I don't want to do fire...because people walk right into it.
Then, you have the people who don't think you are spinning real fire


Faith
Nay, whatever comes one hour was sunlit and the most high gods may not make boast of any better thing than to have watched that hour as it passed

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NYC


NYC

NYC
Location: NYC, NY, USA

Total posts: 9232
Posted:Bah... worst thing that could happen is your kid dies, and then you can always just have another one!

Why bother parenting when natural selection will do a better job of it anyway.

ubbangel


Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]

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PK_
BRONZE Member since Dec 2001

PK_

Lambretta Fanatic
Location: , United Kingdom

Total posts: 4993
Posted: Written by: NYC



Bah... worst thing that could happen is your kid dies, and then you can always just have another one!





shrug



Parents have a responsibility to uphold and that is to take care of their brood in way possible and any one else that is put in a responsible situation with any ones child.



That maybe the worst that could happen but is not the most positive thing to be said. Your entitled to your opinion but I feel that you will spark some thing off with it.



hug

EDITED_BY: PK_ (1191252710)


PK.

"To be an angel, one need not have wings.
In giving love there is an equal grace.
Nor need one seek the aura in the face,
As love unveils the beauty of all things."

*Francois Couperin.

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Mynci
BRONZE Member since Apr 2005

Mynci

Macaque of all trades
Location: wombling free..., United Kingd...

Total posts: 8737
Posted:I know that me and marie have instilled a health fear of fire into her little one biggrin he's burnt his mouth on food a couple of times and now when he hears us say Tan or uf-tan (I believe tan is welsh for fire) he jumps back like somethings gonna bite him. kind of like NLP or a pavlovian response. he's aware we do it for a reason and until he can understand a little better it will do wink

A couple of balls short of a full cascade... or maybe a few cards short of a deck... we'll see how this all fans out.

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faith enfire
BRONZE Member since Jan 2006

faith enfire

wandering thru the woods of WI
Location: Wisconsin, USA

Total posts: 3556
Posted:lol

I always liked the sound of welsh


Faith
Nay, whatever comes one hour was sunlit and the most high gods may not make boast of any better thing than to have watched that hour as it passed

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newgabe
SILVER Member since Mar 2005

newgabe

what goes around comes around. unless you're into stalls.
Location: Bali, Australia

Total posts: 4030
Posted:This topic has been discussed a number of times in 2005:
here and in a parallel thread here.


.....Can't juggle balls but I sure as hell can juggle details....

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newgabe
SILVER Member since Mar 2005

newgabe

what goes around comes around. unless you're into stalls.
Location: Bali, Australia

Total posts: 4030
Posted: Written by: PK_



I'm a Moth... Pele is a fire rolleyes ubblove



offtopic and awaiting spankings.





you know, I'm getting bit tired of constantly being reminded in all sorts of irrelevent places about this relationship. Good on you PK, you've hit it off with someone on the internet. Big deal. Get a room. is that the sort of spanking you were after?


.....Can't juggle balls but I sure as hell can juggle details....

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PK_
BRONZE Member since Dec 2001

PK_

Lambretta Fanatic
Location: , United Kingdom

Total posts: 4993
Posted:shrug







rolleyes

EDITED_BY: PK_ (1191345270)


PK.

"To be an angel, one need not have wings.
In giving love there is an equal grace.
Nor need one seek the aura in the face,
As love unveils the beauty of all things."

*Francois Couperin.

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