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Forums > Social Chat > parental guidelines at festivals

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jo_rhymes
SILVER Member since Apr 2005

jo_rhymes

Momma Bear
Location: Telford, Shrops, United Kingdo...

Total posts: 4525
Posted:I was discussing this with Clare earlier and was wondering if any of you could add to this.

At a festival (eg, Play, Southern Lights, etc) do you think there should be guidelines for parents?

For example i think that parents should take responsibility for their children and not think that because they know everyone at the festival that the child is safe and can run around willy nilly.

Sure the kids ARE safe, but it means that the responsibility of those children are then put on someone elses shoulders.

Now, I don't have children, but if I did I wouldnt want them to see me wasted, see my friends wasted and to generally see the naughtiness that happens at festivals.

Also, at shows where kids heckle and you want them to shut up, and you are wondering "where on earth are this kids parents?"

any thoughts?


Hoppers are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

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Mr_Joe
BRONZE Member since Aug 2008

Mr_Joe

Part-time genius
Location: , Netherlands

Total posts: 59
Posted: Written by: Firetramp


 Written by: ravehead


simple answer......................LEAVE KIDS AT HOME IF YOU WANT TO SPEND A FESTIVAL GETTING WASTED wink



Well, thanks Ravehead. I shall lock myself and my baby up the whole summer and not do anything until she graduates?!



There are shades of grey in this particular matter. It's possible to be a responsible parent at a festival, as a couple of posters in this thread have shown. He also said that you should maybe leave the kids at home, not stay yourself, and then only if you want to get wasted (which would be entirely irresponsible if you're supposed to be looking after kids).

I know what Ravehead says can be controversial at times, but he made a good point there. Please don't put words in people's mouth and then bite their heads off. It's just not cricket.


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Wild Child
SILVER Member since Sep 2004

Wild Child

Star Trekker
Location: Cheshire, United Kingdom

Total posts: 1733
Posted:So far, the thread has shown us:
- the importance of the issue early in the (UK) festy season
- no-one is saying kids shouldn't go to festies, in fact most people (all?) welcome them there
- 'mis-behaved' kids (broad spectrum here!) generally are a result of poor or absent supervision
- putting kids at high risk of danger is not acceptable anywhere, not just festies
- parents are responsible for their children's behaviour and, more importantly, safety at all times, at a festy or otherwise
- responsibility for kids can only be passed from parents to people who accept it and agree to it
- mums & dads are wonderful people - both in their own right and as parents - and frequently have a tough time juggling and balancing thier lives
- we all want everyone to have fun at festies

So Firetramp, why did Ravehead's statement 'leave your kids at home if you want to spend a festival getting wasted' make you angry? What do you want/intend to do whilst you have your baby (not 17 yr okd) at a festival that isn't covered by the above points?


'The last rays of crimson on the spindle tree as the cerise fruit splits and reveals its orange seeds in a gloriously clashing colour scheme no-one would ever dare to wear'
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alien_oddity


alien_oddity

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Location: in the trees

Total posts: 7193
Posted: Written by: Joe_47


 Written by: Firetramp


 Written by: ravehead


simple answer......................LEAVE KIDS AT HOME IF YOU WANT TO SPEND A FESTIVAL GETTING WASTED wink



Well, thanks Ravehead. I shall lock myself and my baby up the whole summer and not do anything until she graduates?!



There are shades of grey in this particular matter. It's possible to be a responsible parent at a festival, as a couple of posters in this thread have shown. He also said that you should maybe leave the kids at home, not stay yourself, and then only if you want to get wasted (which would be entirely irresponsible if you're supposed to be looking after kids).

I know what Ravehead says can be controversial at times, but he made a good point there. Please don't put words in people's mouth and then bite their heads off. It's just not cricket.



thanks joe i was about to headbutt the keyboard until i read the last bit.
wink


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Durbs
BRONZE Member since Sep 2001

Durbs

Classically British
Location: Epsom, Surrey, England

Total posts: 5688
Posted: Written by: Ravehead


simple answer......................LEAVE KIDS AT HOME IF YOU WANT TO SPEND A FESTIVAL GETTING WASTED
 Written by: Firetramp


Well, thanks Ravehead. I shall lock myself and my baby up the whole summer and not do anything until she graduates?!






 Written by: Durbs


However, try telling a parent this without them biting your head off wink



Damn, why am I always right? wink

But actually...yes...if you want to get wasted at a festival, don't bring your kid. If you bring your kid, don't get wasted.


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Bubbles_
SILVER Member since Nov 2004

Bubbles_

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: mancunian, United Kingdom

Total posts: 3383
Posted:IMO i agree with most of whats been said, i think a lot depends on the age of the child and it is subjective to their own personality/behaviour. however, putting grey areas aside, i think that maybe festivals should have some sort of possible curfew for younger children. there was one at southern lights who was up till dawn....
now i dont know how old he was, or what the situation was, i do know there was a lot of wasted behavior around the fire, and that in my opinion, its not good for a young child to experience what happened that night.

unfortunately like durbs said, telling someone what and how to do something in your opinion is hard, and not necessarily our place UNLESS there is something going on that is putting the child at risk.
I dont think any RESPONSIBLE adult would get wasted with a young child. in my opinion if the child is a little older, drinking can be ok as long as they are not complety wasted. but certainly no parent should take drugs while caring for children IMO.

kids heckling should get eggs thrown at them ubblol j/king wink

unfortunatly, there are those parents (not all!) who will do as they like and cause problems for others, and the kids suffer, the only way i can think around that is if festival official do have a word with them and try and sort out any issues there and then. at least if they do get at least a few peeps stating their complaints, it might make them realise? shrug


Disclaimer:im not responsible for what i say or do whether it be before,during and after drinking alcoholic substances (owned by BMVC).
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jo_rhymes
SILVER Member since Apr 2005

jo_rhymes

Momma Bear
Location: Telford, Shrops, United Kingdo...

Total posts: 4525
Posted:I can think of at least 7 children I know who attend these festivals who behave brilliantly. They are as good as gold, and their parents are wonderful with them.

I don't want parents to read this thread and think "oh, I'll not be welcome because people are angry".

That's not the case at all. Children add to the whole festival atmosphere with their fun and laughter.

Even though spinny meets ARE family friendly, naughtiness does happen. The inner workings of a child's psyche are very complicated and delicate, and I want us all to do as little as possible to mess these kids up!


Hoppers are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

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Wild Child
SILVER Member since Sep 2004

Wild Child

Star Trekker
Location: Cheshire, United Kingdom

Total posts: 1733
Posted:ditto and so say all of us hug

'The last rays of crimson on the spindle tree as the cerise fruit splits and reveals its orange seeds in a gloriously clashing colour scheme no-one would ever dare to wear'
Euonymous Europeus

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fireflyfaerie


journeyman


Total posts: 73
Posted:im like 15 years old, and go to quite a few festivals, and although i like being givin the oppotunity to like go alone for part a day i think for kids below 10 spech should have stronger guidlines. festivals are mostly safe but u walk past a stewards tent and depending on the size of the festival, theres all ways some one whos lost mum or dad, and there cud still be dangerous ppl around.
when i was smaller i used to have chek places where i wud have to met dad like every 2 hrs or something. and wen i was very small i would have a badge with my age and to take me to kids area if lost.


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Durbs
BRONZE Member since Sep 2001

Durbs

Classically British
Location: Epsom, Surrey, England

Total posts: 5688
Posted:ditto to Jo's comments.

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FireTom


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Total posts: 6650
Posted:Nudity in itself (like on a rainbow gathering) is not necessarily "naughty", but generally "natural"... I don't think that a child's consciousness will be damaged for life, if they see an adult walk or dance nakid in the rain. shrug



But there certainly is something on top of this and other behaviour a child "should not" have to see.



Such as completely derailed behaviour of ppl on acid on a festival, or close encounters with some "48 hours on *fill in any kind of mind alerting drug* person"...



Unfortunately I had to see some children without guidance running on a rave/ festival meeting "the freakshow" and their parents being part of this - and it censored me off.



Not parents who bring their kids in general help - there are some very responsible adults and some of them even do take drugs - but as Clare said it:



 Written by: Clare

Taking drugs isn't a basic need... protecting children is.





If you have to bring your kid and can't care for it, care for someone who can or "lock yourself up until s/he graduates" - or choose not to care at all, but then don't complain about "funny looks and vibes" sent from those who notice.



I find myself in a struggle with myself, as I simply can't just take your kid away from you and lead it to the children area (if there is one). MY "funny look" just derives from being helpless in that particular moment... nothing personal, because outside this moment you might be acting responsible...

EDITED_BY: FireTom (1184014198)


the best smiles are the ones you lead to wink

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