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ickleMatt


ickleMatt

enthusiast
Location: L.O.N.D.O.N.

Total posts: 242
Posted:What did I want to be when I was to grow up? I remember them asking it at school - think, aspire, aim I dont know if I was lacking in imagination or was it that I truly thought the whole process a waste of time, but I didnt really have any conception of what I may or may not become. Perhaps by merely suggesting one specific hope was in some way denying the possibility all others; thus somehow diminishing the beauty of the multitude of possibilities. Having said that I cant really blame the teacher for giving me detention for exclaiming in front of class my wanting to become a bin man when Im older.

Now that I should have become who I was to be; am I emptying bins across South London? No, thankfully not. But yet my primary instinct to rejection the limitations of possibilities still holds true; I feel, more than ever, the fullness of potential. Sure Ill never be a footballer for England (most are younger than me already) but those truly meaningful beings in life are still open to me: to be a good parent, to be a loving partner, to be a success, to be a positive energy in other peoples lives, to be more confident in social situations, and most importantly to be content. Why is it most important to be content? Because it is the only one you can become Now, and the rest follow surely for the truly content.


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Stone
GOLD Member since Jun 2001

Stream Entrant
Location: Melbourne

Total posts: 2830
Posted:Hi matt, hows it going?

You may not be emptying bins across South London, but I would suggest that what you said to yourself, when your teacher gave you detention, has probably impacted on who you have become. I suppose the question to ask yourself is what really motivated you as a kid, before someone shut you down. I wanted to be a writer, but now it is the possibility I am living into that gives me who I am in the present, not some story from the past.

Its great that you recognise your potential as a human being, most people are content to live good but ordinary lives, without realising they can have much more out of life. I do Landmark Education, and anything your want for your self or your life is available out of your participation in the Landmark Forum. And while that may sound like a clich, the education works. Just ask if you need more information.


smile


If we as members of the human race practice meditation, we can transcend our fear, despair, and forgetfulness. Meditation is not an escape. It is the courage to look at reality with mindfulness and concentration. Thich Nhat Hanh

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Doc Lightning
GOLD Member since May 2001

Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

Total posts: 13920
Posted:I wanted to be a doctor...

-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

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zombiedale
BRONZE Member since Jul 2006

zombiedale

member
Location: Belfast, Northern ireland

Total posts: 31
Posted:I wanted more of the same with a height advantage on everyone else.

Make your wishes simple and they will come true.


And as the skin rips off i cherish the revolting thought That even if i quit There's not a chance in hell i'd stop- The Dresden Dolls

The truth no matter who it hurts - Transmetropolitan by Warren Ellis

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Stout
SILVER Member since May 2004

Stout

Pooh-Bah
Location: Canada

Total posts: 1872
Posted:Careful with the whole contentment idea, it can keep you working in that crappy bar/restaurant job and living in your parent's basement until you're in your 30's

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The Tea Fairy
SILVER Member since Jul 2004

The Tea Fairy

old hand
Location: Behind you...

Total posts: 853
Posted:I wanted to be a horse... redface

I was only 4 though.


Idolized by Aurinoko

Take me disappearing through the smoke rings of my mind....

Bob Dylan

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Rouge Dragon
BRONZE Member since Jul 2003

Rouge Dragon

Insert Champagne Here
Location: without class distinction

Total posts: 13215
Posted:I wanted to be a teacher (my mother and grandmother's profession)

Then I wanted to be a lawyer (I was little miss stand-up-for-rights-in-the-classroom)

Then I wanted to be a diplomat (wanted to change the world)

While at the same time wanting to be an olympic rower.

Now I don't know what I want to do. I had to academia and potential to be all of the above, but now I just don't know. I have dreams, but none of the realistic variety.

I think it's frightening that so much pressure is put on us to know what we want to be and to suceed. I know I crumble under it almost every day.


i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey

Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...

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maus
BRONZE Member since Mar 2017

maus

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Sihanoukville, cambodia

Total posts: 4191
Posted:I wanted to be a cowgirl, own my own ranch, live of my own land, and drink bourbon straight, whilst having a glass slid to me across a bar.I wanted to spend my youth hunting and reering livestock, outside in the sun, and then as i got older be able to wake up next to omebody i care about, and bring kids into a world where things are just wholesome.

In fact, I'd still quite like that dream.

smile


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The Tea Fairy
SILVER Member since Jul 2004

The Tea Fairy

old hand
Location: Behind you...

Total posts: 853
Posted:I wanted to be a cowboy (well, cowgirl) too, when I found out i couldn't actually become a horse. Totally with you on the whole wholesome outdoors lifestyle thing.

Idolized by Aurinoko

Take me disappearing through the smoke rings of my mind....

Bob Dylan

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coleman
SILVER Member since Aug 2002

coleman

big and good and broken
Location: lunn dunn, yoo kay

Total posts: 7330
Posted:from the age of five i wanted to be a fighter pilot - neeeeeeeeeyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuummmmmmmm! biggrin

then i had to get glasses and that went down the pan (thankfully - i would have hated it i'm sure).

i'm only just discovering what it is i want to do with the rest of my life, work-wise but at least i worked it out in the end... ubbrollsmile


cole. x


"i see you at 'dis cafe.
i come to 'dis cafe quite a lot myself.
they do porridge."
- tim westwood

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Kathain_Bowen


Kathain_Bowen

Good Ol' Yarn For Hair
Location: Atlanta, GA, USA

Total posts: 422
Posted:..... I wanted to be a marine biologist, an astronaut, a dancer/ballerina, an equine vet, a horse trainer, a mechanical engineer, a fine artist, and a rock star. Translation: I wanted to basically be Barbie.

Sadly, my high school, a "magnet" school, has decided to force students to sign a waiver when they enter that they are committing to enter into an engineering field. They are not allowed to deviate. I'm not sure how the school plans to enforce this when the students begin to apply for colleges, but I've heard enough of rumors to even venture a guess. When I entered high school, what I wanted to do was nothing like what I discovered was anywhere near my true calling. I can't imagine being forced as a freshman in high school to decide what you want to be in life. It makes me very disappointed in my school.


"So long and thanks for all the fish."

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ickleMatt


ickleMatt

enthusiast
Location: L.O.N.D.O.N.

Total posts: 242
Posted: Written by: stone


Hi matt, hows it going?




Yeah. Cool man. Sweet. Feeling like my life is just starting, but not fast enough, somehow. Remeeting old friends, finding my feet, generally renquinting myself with London.

How's it at your end?

 Written by: stone


You may not be emptying bins across South London, but I would suggest that what you said to yourself, when your teacher gave you detention, has probably impacted on who you have become. I suppose the question to ask yourself is what really motivated you as a kid, before someone shut you down. I wanted to be a writer, but now it is the possibility I am living into that gives me who I am in the present, not some story from the past.




Yeah, maybe. Maybe I never, ever wanted to be a bin man? What motivated me as a kid? Stories. Stories of adventure and great deeds. Did someone shut me down?

As for the past? Well thats a sum of my actions and reactions, and if you are to be judged by not what you say but what you do, the past pretty much makes who I am . I can't escape the past, nor can I let it affect my future.

Oh and the other day I found out what I was wanted say when I was a kid: "I want to be a social entrepreneur when I grow up"

 Written by: Kathain_Bowen


Sadly, my high school, a "magnet" school, has decided to force students to sign a waiver when they enter that they are committing to enter into an engineering field.



Thats an odd thing for a school to do. Do they offer you an alternative school to go to? What about life choices and things like that? And whats this "magnet" school thingy about?

 Written by: The_Tea_Fairy


I wanted to be a horse...

I was only 4 though.



Born in 1978 means that by the Chinese calender I am a horse. I like to think a Russian wild horse smile

Actually I did have a 'understanding' with an orangutan at the zoo once. Though I think any idea of living in captivity probably wasn't appealing.


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NOn


activist for HoPper liberation.
Location: ffidrac

Total posts: 1643
Posted: Written by: stout


Careful with the whole contentment idea, it can keep you working in that crappy bar/restaurant job and living in your parent's basement until you're in your 30's



I think that depends on your personality type, i have been perfectly happy in the past working in a crappy shop job and living in my parents house, because i consider it a step to getting somewhere else. If being in that situation is a problem, then that person is clearly not content with their life. If they are in fact content, then it's only society's view of them that is their problem (and quite probably a problem for the parents also...)

But I think it's sad that so many people think that's not ok, that you shouldn't be content, for some reason you always have to have this burning resentment for your current situation. But it's not true, i go with the flow of change, i take opportunities available to me, new challenges are what keeps me content, i don't resent anything even if i have been unhappy at times. Admittedly you can get stuck in a rut, by no fault of your own, but chances are it's not through contentment. Any one of us could at some point become homeless and not be able to get out of that situation, wanting to get out of homelessness just ain't going to cut it on it's own, there are many factors that make it hard for a homeless person to get out of that situation. That's a REAL rut, it's beyond your control when you are in the hands of housing schemes and hostels, with no permanent abode and very little chance of employment because of that reason... Luckily I am thankful enough to have never been in that situation and i am utterly grateful to be living with my parents right now, otherwise i wouldn't be doing what i want to do. And if i wasn't doing that and i had a shitty job, i might not be content but i'd still be grateful because i wouldn't be sleeping on a doorstep...

So when i grew up i variously wanted to be an astronaut, dentist, meteorologist, geophyscist, marine engineer, and furniture designer when i was growing up, I am now happily for the last 4 months in a creative job doing web design, nevertheless i don't see myself doing it forever, i've just started a DVD project for which i am going to travel round Europe, and one day i plan to go back to uni and do a postgraduate course, and beyond that i'd like to be a sustainable architect, i want to build my own boat, be a diving instructor and if the opportunity presents itself, i'd still go and be an astronaut, and so much more. Yet someone (who doesn't really know me so well to be fair) has recently been banging on about how i seem too content with my life and that i should do more, have more ambition... THAT pisses me off and causes me discontentment... umm

I may have gone on too long but that (see above, last sentence) has been really bugging me today and this thread sort of gave me a chance to rant in a non-too-ranty way. smile

anyone know a fast-track astronaut training programme?


Aurinko freedom agreement reached 10th Sept 2006

if it makes no sense that's because it's NOn-sense.

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ickleMatt


ickleMatt

enthusiast
Location: L.O.N.D.O.N.

Total posts: 242
Posted:Nice one NOn.
smile


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Kathain_Bowen


Kathain_Bowen

Good Ol' Yarn For Hair
Location: Atlanta, GA, USA

Total posts: 422
Posted: Written by: ickleMatt


 Written by: Kathain_Bowen


Sadly, my high school, a "magnet" school, has decided to force students to sign a waiver when they enter that they are committing to enter into an engineering field.



Thats an odd thing for a school to do. Do they offer you an alternative school to go to? What about life choices and things like that? And whats this "magnet" school thingy about?



Magnet schools are schools in the area that teach within a semi-focused realm. In our area, the local vocational school district runs four. Marine Academy of Science and Technology, Allied Health and Science, Communications High School, and, the last (and my school), High Technology High School. Essentially, for most of us, they were an excuse for kids who actually got something of education to get a GOOD education, because the schools were more driven, with better teachers, WAY smaller class sizes, and a much better funding system. You have to apply to them, and pass. And, during your time there, you have to apply your studies towards a focus (*in HTHS's case- computers, communication, engineering, technology, and science). Basically, for us, this was integrating computer and tech courses in with our core classes.

But, like I said, many students go to get away from the poor school districts in other areas. My "sending" school (the school I should have attended and had to provide bussing to HTHS as well as allow me to participate in their after school activities if I so chose), was Matawan-Aberdeen Regional High School. it was a school that put too much focus on football, because Matawan's a "football town." The school system there was poorly funded and downright dangerous. Before I left the middle school there, there was both a bomb threat and a gun threat. In the wake of Columbine, and in the fact that both my brother and I had the interest in technology at the time, my parents were more than thrilled when both John and I decided to go to High Tech and were accepted there.

My choice was suckass education vs. high school that cared and worked for its students. Your "alternative choices" were marine biology/navy (MAST), human medicine (AHHS), or "communications" (CHS).


"So long and thanks for all the fish."

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Stout
SILVER Member since May 2004

Stout

Pooh-Bah
Location: Canada

Total posts: 1872
Posted:True, it does depend on your personality type, but I have yet to meet anyone in this type of situation who is, indeed, truly content. I'm talking about the people who took the first job offered to them after high school,, maybe spent a couple of years partying, then maybe got themselves locked into various forms of debt. Before they knew it, years had passed, and suddenly they have to come to terms with their own unhappiness, usually by becoming a complete,,well I'll use the word moody, on the job.

Working a Mcjob and living at home is not that bad if it's the means to some sort of an end. Say, going back to school, or saving for a down payment on a place of your own. I'm talking about NOT taking oppurtunities as they're presented, simply by convincing yourself that "I don't want to" or "why should I?" IMO it's confusing contentment with apathy. Looking back I can see that I totally wasted my life from when I was 18 until I was 23, working in a crappy restaurant job.

At 24 I went back and got a proper high school education, then a degree in biochemistry, and although I've been making my living as a self employed artist for the past 10 years, I'm glad i did it. My plan was to go to veterinary school, but I couldn't pull off the GPA, oh well, at least I tried, and haven't spent my life wondering " what if " Some of those people I worked with in that restaurant, are still in the same jobs, but at different locations, and no, they are not content

NoN, I see you have plans, but suppose you didn't ,would you stil be as content ? The things you aspire to do take commitment and drive, maybe you should casually inform your critic that you do want to do other things with your life, i.e. let them get to know you better.

We all had great plans when we were children,, didn't we?


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NOn


activist for HoPper liberation.
Location: ffidrac

Total posts: 1643
Posted: Written by: stout


True, it does depend on your personality type, but I have yet to meet anyone in this type of situation who is, indeed, truly content. I'm talking about the people who took the first job offered to them after high school,, maybe spent a couple of years partying, then maybe got themselves locked into various forms of debt...

...I'm talking about NOT taking oppurtunities as they're presented, simply by convincing yourself that "I don't want to" or "why should I?" IMO it's confusing contentment with apathy. Looking back I can see that I totally wasted my life from when I was 18 until I was 23, working in a crappy restaurant job.



yeah, I agree that this can happen. Maybe this has a lot to do with the huge kick in the face you get on leaving school. that realisation that you don't HAVE to do anything anymore, but not everyone is ready to take a leap into something new whether it's going to college or trying to find a career. I think is the situation with my brother, I know there are many things he likes doing, but he has ignored opportunities to do them, more i think out of fear than anything else. I wouldn't say he was content, but he's comfortable and hauling himself out of one situation and going into a new one, just seems to be too big for him. I do think he is slowly moving away from that mindset though.

 Written by: stout

At 24 I went back and got a proper high school education, then a degree in biochemistry, and although I've been making my living as a self employed artist for the past 10 years, I'm glad i did it.



Go you! biggrin

 Written by: stout


NoN, I see you have plans, but suppose you didn't ,would you stil be as content ? The things you aspire to do take commitment and drive, maybe you should casually inform your critic that you do want to do other things with your life, i.e. let them get to know you better.




As for this question, i'd say i have ideas, but I wouldn't lay them down as strictly as 'plans'. It doesn't have to be followed to the letter, i might find some other area that interests me more and go off in that direction instead. I never thought of doing web design until about 8 months ago! so yes, i think i would be content without plans, so long as i have ideas and interests. If i run out of them, i'm scuppered....

as for my critic, i think we just have a misunderstanding. This guy is a much older 'escapee' of the rat race, i however have never felt constrained to it in the first place. So there is definately a different mindset, i also kind of have the impression, that what he really means is not to have ambition to do what i want, when i want, but rather to fit all the fun stuff in now before i have to get a mortgage and a husband and drop two kids when i hit 30... It might take a while to convince him otherwise, given i only have about ten minutes talktime every morning when i'm buying my hot chocolate...


Aurinko freedom agreement reached 10th Sept 2006

if it makes no sense that's because it's NOn-sense.

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UnclassifiedLeggyGirl
BRONZE Member since Aug 2006

UnclassifiedLeggyGirl

One day penguins will take over the world
Location: Derby

Total posts: 916
Posted:when i was younger than i am now (i cant say when i was young because i AM young still) i wanted to be a farmer, but i never wanted to kill the animals, i thought it would be alright if i sold the animals when they died naturally (how wrong i was!) but now, what i want to be when im older, is happy. i dont care what im doing, how much money i have, or what people think of me, if im happy then that is all i want out of life (although a nice job, a husband and kids would be nice aswell ubbrollsmile

ummmm...........anybody have any suggestions as to what i can put here?!

mjk is monitoring your interwebs!

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JTSpinner
SILVER Member since Aug 2006

JTSpinner

Learnin About Burnin
Location: Michigan

Total posts: 385
Posted:I never was sure what I wanted to be when I grew up and I guess that I still am not sure what direction I want to go with what I have left in life.

I have spent most of my "adult" life in uniform. 8 1/2 years as a U.S. Marine (18 - 26) and then I decided to get into Law Enforcement from which I will retire bounce bounce2 in March 2008 after 20 1/2 years (35 - 56). If I had followed my college education route, I would either be a bean counter for someone or working in Management (for someone besides myself cause I don't pay to good!!) I have always followed my own path when it comes to my travel through life and I really can't say as I regret any of the decisions that I have made. Besides, I always wanted to be a "Policeeman" when I grow up and now I are one (sort of). tongue wave


I may be crazy but I ain't stupid

Life is to short to waste it on stupidity

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Stone
GOLD Member since Jun 2001

Stream Entrant
Location: Melbourne

Total posts: 2830
Posted:Cool matt, glad you feel like you life is just starting. You can escape the past. I know you didnt want to be a bin man, but it is often the stories we make up about an incident that keeps our past in the future.

Like for example, we put up our hand at school because we are sure we know the right answer to a question, then when the teacher asks us, and we give the wrong answer and everyone in class laughs at us. In that moment of embarrassment, we say something to ourselves, like Im must be stupid" or " Im never going to stand out again . For me, that was when I became afraid of performing in public. When we realised that it is the story we made up about an incident that gives us who we are in the present, then we can move on, and we create something new in that space that was prevously closed.

On the Sunday night in the Landmark Forum all the past disappears out of your future and what opens up is space; space to create you want to be, without the constraints of the past dictating who you are in the present You feel like you have the enthusiasm and future of a five year old starting out in life, before there were any constraints in life.

Hi Non, we all have the ability to be extraordinary, and the people at HOP are extraordinary. There is nothing wrong being perfectly happy working in a crappy job, especially if you consider it a step to getting somewhere else. I think the trap here is that we stay in these crappy situations, and become resigned to life being as good as it gets. I dont think it has anything to do with society. If your life lacks power, freedom and full self expression, in any area of life, then there is probably something hidden in your past that is holding you back. Once you identify that hidden thing, space opens up for you to create a new way of being. For example, I stopped juggling with my juggling partner. I said it was because I had a new job and didnt have the time, what was really happening was he was a better juggler than me and I wasnt going to compete with someone who was better than me. Once I identified and shared this with him, a whole new world of self-expression opened up for both of us.

To answer your question, "Does anyone know a fast-track astronaut training programme?" Yes, Landmark Education, it produces break through results in any area of your life that is not working, or not working as well as you would like.


Cheers smile


If we as members of the human race practice meditation, we can transcend our fear, despair, and forgetfulness. Meditation is not an escape. It is the courage to look at reality with mindfulness and concentration. Thich Nhat Hanh

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jo_rhymes
SILVER Member since Apr 2005

jo_rhymes

Momma Bear
Location: Telford, Shrops

Total posts: 4525
Posted:I wanted to be a pro guitarist when I was at school, then at work experience i helped out at a nursery school and wanted to do that.
Then I got depression when I was 17 and everything suddenly went PLOP, and I've tried to not think about doing anything because it just made me angry with myself for being sad.

Now I still don't have a job but I've realised that I just want to be happy and I want to give something back, either working with old people or little kiddies or dogs (I'd LOVE to work with dogs).

If i was funny enough I'd love to be a stand up comic. I dunno if i could do it though! I'll just keep practicing in front of molly- when she pants it looks like she's laughing anyway! xx


Hoppers are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

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Lokii
BRONZE Member since Aug 2006

member
Location: Scummerset, UK

Total posts: 34
Posted:I wanted to be an eventer, then an archaeologist, then a photographer, then a stunt rider, then I lost the plot. lol ubbloco

Ended up being a radio presenter somehow and jacked it in because the music was rubbish, lack of freedom, and the people too full of themselves. Might well have been a bad move moneywise but as far as the contentment theory goes, i'm more content now living in the country and doing whatever I stumble across. More free time and more peace with the world etc. ubbrollsmile

Can always go back to what I was doing before but i'm a firm believer in always being on a diagonal, slightly wonky tangent! rolleyes

Am still thinking of working on the stunt rider thing though, the horses are well acclimatised to poi so that's a circussy start ubblol


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