• You must now select Courier Delivery if you wish to receive items before Christmas.
 
Page: 12
Magickal_Kaleidoscope


member
Location: Newcastle, Australia

Total posts: 119
Posted:probabally been done before but i missed out.
but i think everyone should share there limericks
they are nice'n'easy and lots of fun.

there once was a boy
who had just got some poi
he set them alite
on the stroke of midnight
and danced around in joy

that same boy
whod just got the poi
he really tried
but regardles he died
so you shouldn't drink soy

thats the best ive got for the moment and id love to hear what everyone else can come up with


Delete Topic

Magickal_Kaleidoscope


member
Location: Newcastle, Australia

Total posts: 119
Posted:I once knew a big Welsh coal miner
who wanted to dig to china

plez continue ppl


Delete

Rozi
SILVER Member since Jan 2002

100 characters max...
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia

Total posts: 2996
Posted:I once knew a big Welsh coal miner
who wanted to dig through to china
He started in kent
but his shovel was bent
And he ended up back north of Leicester


It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.

What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...

Delete

Durbs
BRONZE Member since Sep 2001

Durbs

Classically British
Location: Epsom, Surrey, England

Total posts: 5688
Posted:I'm sorry but you just can't rhyme China with Leicester

I once knew a big Welsh coal miner
who wanted to dig through to china
He started in kent
but his shovel was bent
so gave up and took an airliner (?)


Burner of Toast
Spinner of poi
Slacker of enormous magnitude

Delete

Doc Lightning
GOLD Member since May 2001

Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

Total posts: 13920
Posted:quote:Originally posted by Rozi:
[QB
there once was a girl from china
Whose hair was like silk only finer
Her boyfriend, cute bloke,
On the hair he did choke...
[/QB]"And from then she tied it behind her."

What, Rozi, was there a possible lewd ending to this one?


-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

Delete

Rozi
SILVER Member since Jan 2002

100 characters max...
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia

Total posts: 2996
Posted:so, think you're good do you? Try finding a british place name that rhymes with China

It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.

What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...

Delete

Durbs
BRONZE Member since Sep 2001

Durbs

Classically British
Location: Epsom, Surrey, England

Total posts: 5688
Posted:Here's a challenge:

There once was a spinner called Orange...


~~~~~
Happy Thursdays - By Durbs (Age 21 and a half)

On Thursdays I do have a laugh
Mucking round with some poi and a staff
So before I die
and go up to the sky
"Happy Thursday!" will be my epitaph

(Ok - you need a Surrey accent to make it rhyme )

We get burnt by the heat of the fire
But it's cold so rarely perspire
For we all come together
In good or bad weather
Even if the said weather is dire

Some days when it gets very nippy
And the floor becomes icy and slippy
We'll jump in a car
And head off to a bar
and generally end up quite tippy ( )

But week after week we return
All standing around for a burn
or per-haps a juggle
or sometimes a snuggle
for we've all got something to learn

It took me a good week or two
To master the 6 beat corkscrew
and it's tricky you see
that behind the back weave
But heck it's something different to do

So hoo-ray for Thursdays with friends
May these social events never end
Whether you're pro or beginning
Just show lots of willing
And next Thusday we'll all meet again


Burner of Toast
Spinner of poi
Slacker of enormous magnitude

Delete

Doc Lightning
GOLD Member since May 2001

Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

Total posts: 13920
Posted:quote:Originally posted by Durbs:
Here's a challenge:

There once was a spinner called Orange...
Who invented a toy called a "borange"
but could not figure out
how to swing it about
So he changed it and called it a "dorange."


-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

Delete

Durbs
BRONZE Member since Sep 2001

Durbs

Classically British
Location: Epsom, Surrey, England

Total posts: 5688
Posted:
Like that one, nicely done.

I've recently got into spinning
I'm a learner, still really beginning
The thing I've been taught
is that just like a sport
It's got nothing to do with the winning

~

I've been playing with poi for a while
But every time they still make me smile
If things start to go bad
I never get mad
It's too hard as I'm already senile

~

The great thing I've learnt about poi
Is you can do them whether a girl a boy
It's all about moving
Closing your eyes and just grooving
Who'd of thought you'd get so much from a toy?!

~

My parents have started to whine
They say I laze to much of the time
It's not that I'm lazy
Just going stir-crazy
Oh please roll on summertime

This winter is making me goo-goo
If you Aussies were here what would you do?
It's too cold for a barbie
or an all-nighter party
You could probably make an igloo

On second thoughts that seems absurd
Oh, I want to fly south like the birds
And go visit Spain
or Minorca again
Anywhere but cold En-ger-land

~

I'd forgotten how fun limmericks could be...

Ok, next one:

I once met a german called Hans...


Burner of Toast
Spinner of poi
Slacker of enormous magnitude

Delete

Doc Lightning
GOLD Member since May 2001

Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

Total posts: 13920
Posted:Who liked to go swimming with swans...

-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

Delete

Rozi
SILVER Member since Jan 2002

100 characters max...
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia

Total posts: 2996
Posted:He wore yellow flippers
that...


It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.

What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...

Delete

Doc Lightning
GOLD Member since May 2001

Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

Total posts: 13920
Posted:that had bright blue zippers...

-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

Delete

Rozi
SILVER Member since Jan 2002

100 characters max...
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia

Total posts: 2996
Posted:I once met a german called Hans
Who liked to go swimming with swans
He wore yellow flippers
That had bright blue zippers
And a snorkel that must have weighed tonnes

(pronouned in the aussie way that sounds more like tuns)

He went for a splash in the pond...

[ 05. February 2003, 21:20: Message edited by: Rozi ]


It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.

What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...

Delete

Chorin
BRONZE Member since Jul 2002

member
Location: Dorking, Surrey, United Kingdo...

Total posts: 217
Posted:where he met a fantastic blond

Dilbert's Words of Wisdom -
I can please only one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow is not looking good either!
You are slower than a herd of turtles stampedeing through peanut butter!

Oh yeah.... Don't tell the ants

Delete

Durbs
BRONZE Member since Sep 2001

Durbs

Classically British
Location: Epsom, Surrey, England

Total posts: 5688
Posted:But she thought he was odd

Burner of Toast
Spinner of poi
Slacker of enormous magnitude

Delete

Doc Lightning
GOLD Member since May 2001

Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

Total posts: 13920
Posted:(maybe born from a pod?)

-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

Delete

Durbs
BRONZE Member since Sep 2001

Durbs

Classically British
Location: Epsom, Surrey, England

Total posts: 5688
Posted:And left him in less than a second

Fortunately along came a brunette


Burner of Toast
Spinner of poi
Slacker of enormous magnitude

Delete

Doc Lightning
GOLD Member since May 2001

Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

Total posts: 13920
Posted:hey, that didn't rhyme!

-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

Delete

Durbs
BRONZE Member since Sep 2001

Durbs

Classically British
Location: Epsom, Surrey, England

Total posts: 5688
Posted:Yes it did!

He went for a splash in a pond
Where he met a fantastic blond
But she thought he was odd
(Maybe born from a pod)
And left him in less than a second

Fortunately along came a brunette...


Burner of Toast
Spinner of poi
Slacker of enormous magnitude

Delete

Rozi
SILVER Member since Jan 2002

100 characters max...
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia

Total posts: 2996
Posted:Who preferred her snorklers wet
Her flippers were green
And her bent was marine
And so they completed the set

But tragedy struck our pair
When she of the brunette hair...

[ 06. February 2003, 19:35: Message edited by: Rozi ]


It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.

What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...

Delete

JauntyJames
SILVER Member since Dec 2004

JauntyJames

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Hampshire College, MA, USA

Total posts: 3533
Posted:Piz tramaz ken tzal kenkihan
Armoz at hatz tsal larildan
Bapleaxer gohon
Ud gutxusokon
Nu jaiuso pi ieotra toman

i found an aliean limrick generator
http://www.herald.co.uk/cgi-bin/limerick?


-James

"How do you know if you're happy or sad without a mask? Or angry? Or ready for dessert?"

Delete

JauntyJames
SILVER Member since Dec 2004

JauntyJames

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Hampshire College, MA, USA

Total posts: 3533
Posted:The limerick is furtive and mean.
You must keep it in close quarantine,
Or she sneaks to the slums,
And promptly becomes
Disorderly, drunk and obscene.


-James

"How do you know if you're happy or sad without a mask? Or angry? Or ready for dessert?"

Delete

=Flashpoint=
SILVER Member since Sep 2004

=Flashpoint=

Pasta of Muppets
Location: in the interwebs..., United Ki...

Total posts: 2719
Posted:There was a young man called Dave
Who found a dead whore in a cave
He saind I know its hard luck
to have a cold censored
But look at the money Ive saved


ohmygodlaserbeamspewpewpew!
ubbrollsmileubbrollsmileubbrollsmileubbrollsmile

Delete

alvheid


alvheid

fairy of light
Location: Bergen, Norway

Total posts: 163
Posted:the only limerick I know is actually in english, so here we go (not for kids):

There once was a girl named Jill
who tried a dynamite stick for a thrill
they found her vagina
in North Carolina
and bits of her tits in Brazil


Luke sum ipse patrem te.

Delete

_Aime_
SILVER Member since Jan 2004

_Aime_

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Hastings, United Kingdom

Total posts: 4172
Posted:i remember saying this one to guards outside buckingham palace last year..

there was a young woman from Ealing
Who had a peculiar feeling
She lay on her back, opened her cr*ck
and pi$$ed all over the ceiling


Delete

Sakura_Moon


Sakura_Moon

Hop's Kitten Jester.
Location: Wonderland igloo, Vic, Austral...

Total posts: 1803
Posted:Ewwww.....
I can remember a good line from a tripod song...its about x-mas day with the family...

Well all went outside and were gazing at venus someone remarked at the size of..
uranus and pluto and saturn and mars, well whats that foul smell? thats just grandmas..
arsenic, which she keeps in a jar by the clock, she rubs some each night on your gandfathrs...
corns, which are painful from shoes that dont fit, now he feels relieved when he sits down to...
christmas day, christmas day, you never knwo that they are going to say!

Rude is you read between the lines...kinda gotta listen to what rhymes adn you get what they were gonna say


.:Pink Exocutioner:.

I am Jack's Raging Bile Duct...

Loving you from the deepest part of my loins.


Delete

Page: 12

Similar Topics

Using the keywords [limmerick] we found the following similar topics.
1. Forums > Limmerick Thread [55 replies]

     Show more..