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Forums > Social Chat > Romance & Courtesy is dead = nurse- 10cc's of adrenaline, STAT!

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Page: 123
TinklePants
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

TinklePants

Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr

Total posts: 4217
Posted:Along came feminism, bye bye went romance. Seriously!



What happened to the days of chivalry, when a man would sweep you off your feet? lay a cloak over a puddle before you, open doors for you or fight to the death for your honour and your heart?



Girl power is all very well (although a little too 1997) but when strong female attitudes arrived, romance began to die. Men have become scared to help out a lady in fear of offending her.



The world's gone too PC, and its ridiculous! It certainly explains why some people are so bloody rude and let me struggle one handed trying to get a buggy through a tiny shop door!



mad2


Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible

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shoshanah
SILVER Member since Nov 2005

shoshanah

enthusiast
Location: london

Total posts: 232
Posted:sorry to any men out there who dont look and do behave i know your not all bad

life is what you make it and what you want it to be

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NYC


NYC

NYC
Location: NYC, NY, USA

Total posts: 9232
Posted:Written by: Rozi




If you want romance, and want it in a certain form, say so. If the person you are requesting it from is not capable of or willing to give it, then find someone who is. But don't blame them for their philosophy/ability.



Don't expect people to have E.S.P. about what you want from them. Simple.





THANK YOU ROZI!



I tried a few times to write a post on this one but they all seemed to condescending and bitchy.



It makes me sad to see how many people are totally inept at figuring out how relationships work. And then blaming women's right to vote for the fact that men aren't interested in them.



See? Condescending and bitchy right? ubbangel


Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]

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TinklePants
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

TinklePants

Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr

Total posts: 4217
Posted:who said anything about voting?

But you can see there's a connection with the two, cant you?


Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible

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jo_rhymes
SILVER Member since Apr 2005

jo_rhymes

Momma Bear
Location: Telford, Shrops

Total posts: 4525
Posted:RE: the good old days where women would look after their men and men would be romantic...I think we're forgetting all the domestic violence that would go on as well. I'm glad those days are behind us.
As for the women and their shoes business- pah!! I'm not bothered about shoes. As long as I have a comfy pair of trainers I'm happy.
biggrin


Hoppers are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

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TinklePants
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

TinklePants

Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr

Total posts: 4217
Posted:but there is still DV going on these days, too...

Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible

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jo_rhymes
SILVER Member since Apr 2005

jo_rhymes

Momma Bear
Location: Telford, Shrops

Total posts: 4525
Posted:yeah there is, but it's no as covered up as it was. Not as much pretence.
I was just saying that "The Golden Days" weren't that golden wink


Hoppers are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

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TinklePants
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

TinklePants

Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr

Total posts: 4217
Posted:just p*ss-stained... lmao ubbangel

Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible

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NYC


NYC

NYC
Location: NYC, NY, USA

Total posts: 9232
Posted:I think that 'chivalry' is a double edged sword.

Yes, it's nice to have someone open a door for you. But in the time of chivalry women were men's property. You could beat or rape your wife legally. (I think you might still be able to rape your wife legally in some states in America but I'm not sure about that one...)

In the time of Chivalry some marriages were arranged. So essentially some rich guy goes and asks your dad if he can marry you, you get no say, and then he owns you. And yes, he should open the door for you the same way that he should treat his slaves properly. Women couldn't own land or even SPEAK in some circumstances.

I think more men would gladly open the door for them if you had dinner ready when they got home, spoke only when spoken to, kept your head down and knew your place, and didn't whine about getting slapped around or raped by your husband every now and then.

Be careful what you wish for.

Women have fought and suffered for hundreds of years to get to the still-unequal point they're at today. Don't blame them because guys are jerks to you.

I do not think that the lack of polite guys you're meeting has much to do with the rise of feminism. Politeness is down across all lines.

There's also the issue that Rozi is bringing up of having an honest relationship. Most people have no clue what that even means. And then blame everything else when they're miserable. They blame men, women, movies, magazines, society, God, the government and even feminism.


Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]

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jo_rhymes
SILVER Member since Apr 2005

jo_rhymes

Momma Bear
Location: Telford, Shrops

Total posts: 4525
Posted:Well done NYC, good point.
Honesty is the best policy. smile


Hoppers are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

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TinklePants
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

TinklePants

Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr

Total posts: 4217
Posted:i never said i had trouble meeting polite guys - i'm not looking for anyone at this particular moment in time.

its the fact that with the rise of feminism, women have become less courteous. And it drives me mental. So i ram the buggy at their ankles when they just stand at look at me odd as i wait for them to move aside for me to pass!


Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible

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animatEd
BRONZE Member since Aug 2004

animatEd

1 + 1 = 3
Location: Bristol UK

Total posts: 3540
Posted:maybe you should be polite and say: 'excuse me, can I get past?' wink

It works both ways, you know...


Empty your mind. Be formless, Shapeless, like Water.
Put Water into a cup, it becomes the cup, put water into a bottle, it becomes the bottle, put water into a teapot, it becomes the teapot.
Water can flow, or it can Crash.
Be Water My Friend.

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TinklePants
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

TinklePants

Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr

Total posts: 4217
Posted:Okay here's what happened - I was walking down the road the other day - two middle aged women walking towards me. Busy road, narrow pavement. It was either stop, or roll the pram onto the road as they continued walking side by side. I had to stop.



Then, i was in the supermarket and a young girl was with a toddler, walking side by side. I came up behind them and said excuse me etc. She moved the boy out of the way, and just stood infront of me, looking at the tinned peaches. She eventually moved out of the way, so i tried to over take her, then she walked off, and in hand in front of me, so i couldn't pass her again! She wasn't blind, or deaf. she saw me approaching. I mean like wtf? am I just invisible? is the pram some kind of cloaking device no-one sees?



Or is it just me, a miserable mum with buggy rage, who is always moving out of the way for others first.



My point is, I give courtesy but I never recieve it and it sucks total ass!



And the same goes for my bloody love life too - too busy playing computer games or watching stupid reality tv to pay me any attention!! hence the title of this thread!



Yes its a rant eek- deal with it...



-----edit----



maybe its just scotland, maybe i'm too shy a person to actually loose my temper and shout "oi, out the way"!

EDITED_BY: TinklePants (1137074829)


Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible

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TinklePants
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

TinklePants

Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr

Total posts: 4217
Posted:on second thoughts, the whole lack of courtesy is probably due to the whole small town girl in the big bad city phenomenon.

Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible

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animatEd
BRONZE Member since Aug 2004

animatEd

1 + 1 = 3
Location: Bristol UK

Total posts: 3540
Posted:hmmm... Well....

The people on the pavement, yeah, that would annoy the crap outta me too... but only because I make a point of moving out of the way for people... I did it for a woman walking her dog the other day, and instead of a smile and a Thankyou, I got a scowl, as if it was mandated by law that I should move... Last time I move for her! next time I'll force her and her dog onto the road...

as for the supermarket, don't you know that upon entering the store, everybody loses the ability to think coherently, and the place becomes full with a bustle of dumb, self centred, annoying shoppers? It angers me most when a person with a trolley will just stand right in the middle, at the end of an aisle reading a label and blocking everyone's way...

I've even taken to telling Cyclists not to cycle on the pavement, and that they should use the cycle lane provided for them... another of my pet hates... I make a point of not moving for them...


Empty your mind. Be formless, Shapeless, like Water.
Put Water into a cup, it becomes the cup, put water into a bottle, it becomes the bottle, put water into a teapot, it becomes the teapot.
Water can flow, or it can Crash.
Be Water My Friend.

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TinklePants
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

TinklePants

Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr

Total posts: 4217
Posted:The thing was, the whole day consisted of this empty headed behaviour. I make a point of dragging my five year old between me and the buggy to make way for others. I also do this in shops, regardless of how stressed I am or how busy the shop is.

It grates on me that others don't do the same. To busy gossiping on the street etc. "yes, and she was seen sitting at the same table as so-and-so - they're probably having an affair..."

mad2

It eats away at me like a disease, like jade goody at a pie, and like elvis at a hamburger!

The only remotely romantic thing that happens to me these days is in my email inbox - "hot girls want to chat to you, NOW!"


Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible

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jo_rhymes
SILVER Member since Apr 2005

jo_rhymes

Momma Bear
Location: Telford, Shrops

Total posts: 4525
Posted:aww ?Tink that sucks. It's true, people are annoying and self-serving out and about in town. (I just got in from town-bleargh!).
But when in your own home, you should feel special and lovely! Not pushed aside!
Why not say to him, "tonight can we have the telly and computer off and just snuggle?"
See what he says, he might like it so much that he does it every night. Its worth a shot. smile


Hoppers are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

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TinklePants
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

TinklePants

Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr

Total posts: 4217
Posted:You're right - it probably wouldn't bother me as much if I was, but I'm not. frown

And me begging for snuggles and other related things is not a pretty sight - besides, its been a year so I've kinda given up trying!

So I will just rant away and damn myself for not taking action ubblol


Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible

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LazyAngel
GOLD Member since Jul 2004

LazyAngel

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Cambridge UK

Total posts: 2895
Posted:Tink: Just think of all the good Karma you must be generating! A piano will probably fall on one of those people's heads while something really good is happening to you!

As for watching reality TV shows: unforgivable!

I think you should attach some sort of jammer/remote switch to the TV and just use it every time something interesting happens (for example of how to do this, watch 'Amelie').

This will help burn off some good karma and provide some good stress relief as well: just make sure you have an evil cackle (but not so loud as to attract attention)


Because ActiveAngel sounds like a feminine deodorant

Like sex, I'm much more interesting in real life than online.

'Be the change you want to see in the world around you' - Ghandi

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NYC


NYC

NYC
Location: NYC, NY, USA

Total posts: 9232
Posted:Written by: TinklePants

The only remotely romantic thing that happens to me these days is in my email inbox - "hot girls want to chat to you, NOW!"



Once again, I just don't think it's fair to blame your own romance troubles on feminism. There are countless other factors that govern who is and isn't snuggling with you.


Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]

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Gidg
BRONZE Member since Apr 2003

Gidg

Super Gidg!!!!
Location: Portland Oregon USA

Total posts: 8506
Posted:One thing that I have found out about romance ... you have to give it to get it.

Growing old is mandatory; growing up is NOT.
Proud member of the HoP DPS.
Sanity is a highly overrated state of mind.
I'm normal ... it's everyone else that's crazy.

Gidg

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tillymoo


tillymoo

member
Location: Brisbane

Total posts: 107
Posted:Written by: Domino

Dylan Moran does I nice thing about romance

Rough quote:

Men are the real romantics. It's men that say things like "I love her utterly, I can't bare not to be with her. If I can't have her I won't be complete that is such a terrible thing that without her I don't see how I can exist." That's how women feel about shoes...



dylan moran can get romantic, or entirely sleazy, with me anytime he wants!! ubblove


"A Thnead's a fine thing that all people need"
Dr Suess

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Motley
GOLD Member since Oct 2005

Motley

addict
Location: UK

Total posts: 434
Posted:Written by: jo_rhymes


be smooth and suave (like me!!) :P





Like when your doing the "bummerfly" ubblol ubblol





sorry couldnt resist :P



Motley



Edit: sorry i really didnt add anything meaningful to the conversation at all did I.. ho hum I'll just get back in my box

EDITED_BY: Motley (1137108390)


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jo_rhymes
SILVER Member since Apr 2005

jo_rhymes

Momma Bear
Location: Telford, Shrops

Total posts: 4525
Posted:the bummerfly is an awesome move!!! You're just jealous!! (ooh i did it with fire t'other day!)

Hoppers are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.

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TinklePants
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

TinklePants

Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr

Total posts: 4217
Posted:Written by: Gidg

One thing that I have found out about romance ... you have to give it to get it.


But what happens when you try to give it and you get pushed away (literally!)?? Plus he wants to get married confused fat chance!

I know there are non romantics out there but if you don't try, if you keep pushing him/her away, try and stop him/her from being themselves, you're gonna lose your other half to someone who wont do these things!


Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible

Delete

Nephtys


Nephtys

resident fridge magnet
Location: Utrecht, The Netherlands

Total posts: 835
Posted:Written by: Rozi

If you want romance, and want it in a certain form, say so. If the person you are requesting it from is not capable of or willing to give it, then find someone who is. But don't blame them for their philosophy/ability.

Don't expect people to have E.S.P. about what you want from them. Simple.



nah, don't agree: this is true fro pretty much all other things in a relationship - and people should definitely work that out and stop complaining about their partners not being able to read their minds. It doesn't work for romance though (for me, anyway): romance just doesn't mean much if it isn't spontaneous. If I were in a relationship with a not naturally romantic person, I'd rather just have them be themselves that have to ASK them to bring home roses or light a few candles.
It's like asking for opinions on your appearance, if someone tells you your outfit looks good (or your bum small biggrin) because you asked, it doesn't count smile


everyone's unique except me

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FireTom


Stargazer


Total posts: 6650
Posted:Written by: Gidg


One thing that I have found out about romance ... you have to give it to get it.





Written by: tinklepants
if you don't try, if you keep pushing him/her away, try and stop him/her from being themselves, you're gonna lose your other half to someone who wont do these things!





clap ditto smile biggrin soapbox wave sunny ubbtickled



Be yourself ! And don't be afraid of being it!



hug


the best smiles are the ones you lead to wink

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NYC


NYC

NYC
Location: NYC, NY, USA

Total posts: 9232
Posted:Written by: TinklePants

But what happens when you try to give it and you get pushed away (literally!)??



I would honestly stop and ask myself "Why am I attracted to someone who isn't attracted to me in the same way?"

But I'm unusually introspective that way.


Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]

Delete

TinklePants
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

TinklePants

Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr

Total posts: 4217
Posted:i have done, but the thing is we been together 3 long years.

Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible

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Motley
GOLD Member since Oct 2005

Motley

addict
Location: UK

Total posts: 434
Posted:Written by: jo_rhymes

the bummerfly is an awesome move!!! You're just jealous!! (ooh i did it with fire t'other day!)



Indeed it is, bummerfly with fire eek roast rump for dinner was it ubblol ubblol


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TinklePants
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

TinklePants

Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr

Total posts: 4217
Posted:i can do bummerfies (i take it u mean btb butterfly lol)

Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible

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Page: 123

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