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FireTom


Stargazer


Total posts: 6650
Posted:... and another nice one for you ...

About 2003 a study has shown that many fathers are (unknowingly) not the actual/ physical dad of their children.

Since the article was put out in "The Spiegel" (German weekly news magazine) many rushed for having their fatherhood tested by institutes and it was some 8% where the father was not the actual dad of the child.

Unfortunately I have not the number of cases in which the woman actually knew about the fact, but just didn't tell him (whyever, but I know that there are very good reasons for doing so and I understand that a woman wants her child to have a father and that a father is actually "performing" better if he truely believes to be the physical dad...)

In addition German legal system prevents fathers to have their children tested without prior permission of the mother (delicate, but fact) - and for a good reason: for say any whacko could claim to be father to Claudia Schiffers kid and have her to run to the lab to proof that he actually isn't.

Also I do not want to fuel anti-female positions, I'd like to see a balanced debate here.

What's your position/ experience?


the best smiles are the ones you lead to wink

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UCOF
SILVER Member since Apr 2002

UCOF

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: , United Kingdom

Total posts: 15414
Posted:Well, I personally am not the father of any children....
I hope.

*crosses fingers*

"I'd like to see a balanced debate here."
Sorry what? What are we debating?
shrug


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FireTom


Stargazer


Total posts: 6650
Posted:Good question... redface



What you think about it?



Okay, or not Okay... ?



Have some example in your surrounding? And what you think is the motif for someone not to tell the guy: Hey, this kid ain't your's actually, but I hope you love me anyways and stay with me......?


the best smiles are the ones you lead to wink

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Birgit
BRONZE Member since Jan 2005

Birgit

had her carpal tunnel surgery already thanks v much
Location: Edinburgh, Scotland (UK)

Total posts: 4145
Posted:Examples? No.

Motif? Being scared that the guy will leave of course, and being both alone with a kid AND without the person you love at the same time. Not saying it's good to lie, but if you're scared of losing everything you care about you might just do it anyways...


"vices are like genitals - most are ugly to behold, and yet we find that our own are dear to us."
(G.W. Dahlquist)

Owner of Dragosani's left half

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Rouge Dragon
BRONZE Member since Jul 2003

Rouge Dragon

Insert Champagne Here
Location: without class distinction, Aus...

Total posts: 13215
Posted:I think the rights of fathers are often forgotten. So much is focused on the women and men are often left behind. I think that is the woman has the right to question, then so should the man.

i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey

Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...

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Firetramp


Firetramp

old hand
Location: Binstead, Isle of Wight

Total posts: 896
Posted:Written by: Birgit

AND without the person you love at the same time.



Uhm, sorry, but if the woman loves the guy, shouldn't she be telling him the truth? And if she loved him that much, why was she sleeping with someone elset at the same time? I know, things are not always that simple and can be more complicated than that but hey, I always say, honesty goes soo much further!

What was the question again?
I think a man should know if yes or no he's the father and if he isn't but loves the woman, he'll stick around for her. Too much of a fairy tale? Maybe, ...but I like to believe in fairy tales.


Ask a question and be a fool for a minute...don't ask and be a fool your whole life.

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Birgit
BRONZE Member since Jan 2005

Birgit

had her carpal tunnel surgery already thanks v much
Location: Edinburgh, Scotland (UK)

Total posts: 4145
Posted:Written by: Birgit

Not saying it's good to lie



*sigh*

Once more to clarify: I'm NOT saying it's the right thing to do, but it happens, and partly for the reasons I've listed. People usually lie because they don't want to face the consequences of what they lie about.


"vices are like genitals - most are ugly to behold, and yet we find that our own are dear to us."
(G.W. Dahlquist)

Owner of Dragosani's left half

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