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Forums > Social Chat > My parents dicorce, and my story.

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Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Hastings
Member Since: 2nd Jan 2004
Total posts: 4172
Posted:My story starts aged 7, Pretty much as far back I can remember, and as far back as I can remember my rents being at each others throats.

My parents were always arguing, and when they'd finished my mums anger would turn to me. She'd try to start an argumant, and i'd take the offer gladly, giving back all that was given, and more often than not it ended withme getting a wallop. Worse cased senario was when mum misjudged a hit, and clobbered me in the side of the head knocking me out cold.

I'll have ot admit, I was no angel child (I'm still not) and I was sometimes "asking for it"

Without going into the nitty gritty details about my parents relationship, my Mum was a stressed control freak and my Dad was an immature old man. Put the two together and you've got a domestic nucleor bomb.

When I was 8 years old I began self harming. Christ knows at that age where I got the idea to do that from - I blame television rolleyes
I began digging my nails into my skin, then scratching so it took away the skin, in long lines. I did this on my legs, and hands. After a particulary bad argumant, when I was 10, between me my Dad and my Mum I sat up all night crying taking all the skin off the back of my left hand, up my first and second finger, and up my wrist and arm. It looked like I'd set a blow torch on myself.

The next morning I was in a daze disgusted from what I'd done to myself, and from the pain. As soon as I got to school I found a teacher showed her my hand and broke down. After that all I remeber is a very quiet journy to the GP with my mum, and the Doctor shaking his head in disbelief at me. He told me I was a silly little girl, told me to put Savlon on it, and sent me away again.
Mum told me to tell everybody I'd fallen over on concrete..
I never did it again after that.

Year 2000 and I start secondary school, my parents are as bad as ever and I was depoending on my friends for support.
Then in year 8 I got a new form tutor. Her name was Ms.Loe. She was amazing. I got into alot of trouble at school and she helped me through it, along with supporting me massivly through my troubles with my family.

In year 10 it finally came - "Your Dad and I are gettign a Divorce" because a) we don't love each other anymore and b) your dads been having an affair
Well a) I could have told you that 8 years ago, and b) I'm not an idiot, I'd worked that one out from myself 3 months ago.
It felt like my world was crumbling. I felt like a fialure for not keeping them together, and that it was my fault - 50% of all the argumants were in one way or another caused by rebel child miss aimz. Mum under the view that I needed to have lots of disapline, dad under the view that I should do what I like, "She'll sort herself out in the end"

The day we moved I sat on the back steps of the house crying myself dry. I didn't want to move. I wanted things to stay the same. The environment that had made me mutilate my body, and I wanted to stay there!
I didn't want to live in a divorced family.

Now it's a little over a year since I moved.
My mum in enganged to my Dad's old best friend (don't ask), to be married in may. I'm all for this, besides the fact I have to be a bridesmaid and wear a poxy dress.
In 21 days we move into his newly refurbished finished-jsut-in-time-by the-skin-of-your-teeth ground floor flat in St.Leonards (inbetween Bexhill and Hastings). It's huge! And my room is bright yellow biggrin
Now my mum is my best friend. We still argue, like any teenage daughter and mother do, but its much much better.

Dad is still typically dad. He rents a small ground floor flat in Hastings with our 2 dogs. We stay with him at the weekend. He's still in a relationship with a married woman. After nearly 3 years her husband dosn't know. I never see her, I don't want to. I hear her and Dad joking on the phone about how long its going to take before her husband keels over. Truth be known that her husband is an absoloute arsehole, but I don't like it.

Lulu is still Daddy's little girl, still the more intelligant one, still wants to be a Doctor. To qoute an extremely drunken mother introducing my and sister to one of her friends at her 40th in October
"Hello! This is my youngest Luce, shes in top set in school for everything! And she wants to study medicine. Oh and this is my eldest Aimz, she plays with fire, she smokes, *and* she has her nipple pierced!"
Christ, got all my life achievemants summed up in one sentance there mum ubblol

A song which I related to most a year ago was 'Stay together for the kids' by Blink 182, the first verse of which was my signiture on here for quite a while.
My anthem now? Queen - Dont stop me now biggrin
Looking back now, my parents divorcing was prolly the best thing thats ever happend to me - and for my parents I am eternally gratefull for them making that decision.

To any HoPer who has given me support over the past 2 years regarding anything, I thank you. I wouldn't be who I am today without the love and friendship of youse lot tongue

Don't stop me now, I'm having such a good time, I'm having a ball...

Internet Hate Machine
Location: They seek him here, they seek ...
Member Since: 26th May 2004
Total posts: 10530


The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."


1 + 1 = 3
Location: Bristol UK
Member Since: 31st Aug 2004
Total posts: 3540
Posted:More chats coming to you...


Take care!!


Empty your mind. Be formless, Shapeless, like Water.
Put Water into a cup, it becomes the cup, put water into a bottle, it becomes the bottle, put water into a teapot, it becomes the teapot.
Water can flow, or it can Crash.
Be Water My Friend.


comfortably numb
Location: The countryside
Member Since: 8th Jul 2004
Total posts: 2676

*is speechless*


.All things are beautiful if we take the time to look.


Location: My House
Member Since: 27th Jun 2005
Total posts: 1286
Posted:hug hug hug hug hug
cant really say much more
hug hug hug hug hug

Proudly Owned By The BMVC

Are You Sniffing My Mitten?


Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Bideford and Bath
Member Since: 4th Jun 2005
Total posts: 3099
Posted:hug hug hug hug hug hug hug

that story really touched me and made me sad

i'm glad things are better now thogh

UCOF "evolution: Poi -> stick -> hoops -> devil stick -> juggling club -> juggling ball -> crayons."

In other words, it's the thumps bump


Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Hastings
Member Since: 2nd Jan 2004
Total posts: 4172

Don't be sad. I'm not sad anymore. Havn't been for a long time. I'm permanently happy!

I've been wanting to write something like this for a long time, and so this afternoon with the weather pissing it down and my poi stranded in London I sat down in Dad's kitchen with pen and paper and wrote it all down.
I wrote it with the hope that somebody else could read it, praps in the same situation as I was, and find some light from it smile


Say what?
Location: Surrey/Portsmouth
Member Since: 24th Dec 2004
Total posts: 4760
Posted:*jumps and snuggles Aimzeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee* ubblove

Location: York, England
Member Since: 15th Mar 2002
Total posts: 4308

Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive

Shalom VeAhavah

New Hampshire has a point....


Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Perth
Member Since: 31st Mar 2003
Total posts: 5814
Posted:Some how miss Aimz is been a pleasure watching you work through it all.
The best bit is seeing you like this. Its been a journey full of crap and stuff but I think I would be proud to have you as a daughter. Nipple ring and all....just would argue about the smoking!
hug hug hug hug

as kids we inherit so much crap from our parents. You are well on the way to shedding their crap. Good stuff.

Im not sure if its that I am more aware now, or if selfharming is more common in spinners than my general communinty.

Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?

Im in a lonely battle with the world with a fish to match the chip on my shoulder. Gnu in Binnu in a cnu

old hand
Location: In a test pit, Mackay
Member Since: 29th May 2003
Total posts: 1107
Posted:Aimee, your writing is truly beautiful.

I wish you all the happiness in the world, after such a bad start you deserve it.

There is a slight possibility that I am not actually right all of the time.

Doc Lightning
Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
Member Since: 28th May 2001
Total posts: 13920
Posted:hug2 kiss ubblove

Aime, you are a beautiful soul and a powerful spirit.

And just for being that, you get a free backrub when we meet.

-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura


Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Hastings
Member Since: 2nd Jan 2004
Total posts: 4172
Posted:Yay! Free backrub! kiss hug

My writing beautiful? Spelling mistakes an' all? wink Golly. Thank you ubblol

Special hugs for Gnor and Mike.
hug hug hug
I remember long PM conversations discussing various things and that lifted me up alot.

Blasphemous Girl
Blasphemous Girl

Location: Gloucestershire
Member Since: 11th Aug 2005
Total posts: 83
Posted:Aimee your story has really touched me, i'm so glad for you that your happy now and things have finally worked out.

i have gone though (and am still going through) some very similar things and you've given me some hope that things will work out for the best in the end


"If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough."


Running hippy spinning lemming
Location: Scotland
Member Since: 16th Jul 2004
Total posts: 15
Posted:wow.... hug hug hug

thank you so much for posting that,
your a very special lovely person... mwa...
hope things just keep getting better for you... you deserve it,
take care
<love and hugs>

Fear leads to anger; anger leads to hate; hate leads to suffering...


I invented the decaffinated coffee table.
Location: Cornwall
Member Since: 10th Oct 2005
Total posts: 453
Posted:Keep looking after yourself Aimee. hug
Its sounds as though you're finally in a position where you can learn that you are worth a whole lot of somethings.
Hoping for good things to continue on and into the future.
Be good to you.

Boo x

I intend to live forever - so far, so good.

If it costs "a penny for your thoughts", but people give you their "two-pence worth", who is getting the extra penny?


old hand
Location: London
Member Since: 1st Jul 2005
Total posts: 965
Massive Hugs For Aimee
hug hug hug hug

Q:"How many Jugglers Does it take to change a light bulb?"
A:"One, but another 99 others saying,'I could do that if I only practised more'" biggrin biggrin

Gate Keeper to Shocked_Prawn. None may pass.


Still wiggling
Location: Belfast
Member Since: 22nd Oct 2002
Total posts: 5967
Posted:Well done for posting and remaining sane beautiful...

Take care and see you next falmouth biggrin


Getting to the other side smile


Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Hastings
Member Since: 2nd Jan 2004
Total posts: 4172
Posted:I was thinking about the fal this morning actually!
Me and the hastings kids, ok well me for certain,as hastingers never have and rudyd money rolleyes biggrin


Location: Caves Beach, NSW
Member Since: 15th Oct 2005
Total posts: 89
Posted:Hi Aimee,
I am new here but I just wanted to encourage you and say this.
Remember, your story is only what has happened in the past and has been dominated by the influence of your parents.
what happens in the present and the future is a new and fresh story that has you as the author.
You are in charge, be free


lovable smart-ass
Location: vineyards, Vienna, Austria
Member Since: 16th Oct 2003
Total posts: 785

"is optimism in austria just a lack of information?"
-Alfred Dorfer