Forums > Social Chat > I have yet another rant...but iI need advice this time!
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Redneck Woman
566 posts
Location: Texas, Yeeeeehaaaaaw, USA
Redneck Woman
566 posts
Location: Texas, Yeeeeehaaaaaw, USA
Posted:
Ok, I am at a lost of what to do right now. I am nine months pregnent and the baby's father left me for my best friends girolfriend. I don't want him to have anything to do with my baby because the whole time we were together he was cheating on me and lying to me about it. (I wouldn't have been so pissed if he would not have lied.) He hit me while I was pregnant and choke me and forced me to have sex with him even though I was put on pelvic rest (no sex) by my doctor. I don't want to put his name on the birth certificate or give the baby his name or let him see the baby at all. What do ya'll think I should do?
Ok, I am at a lost of what to do right now. I am nine months pregnent and the baby's father left me for my best friends girolfriend. I don't want him to have anything to do with my baby because the whole time we were together he was cheating on me and lying to me about it. (I wouldn't have been so pissed if he would not have lied.) He hit me while I was pregnant and choke me and forced me to have sex with him even though I was put on pelvic rest (no sex) by my doctor. I don't want to put his name on the birth certificate or give the baby his name or let him see the baby at all. What do ya'll think I should do?
Top Three Things I've Learn While Being A Mom
1. Baby poop comes in many colors.
2. Makes sure all dirty diapers are not accessable to my dog.
3. Burp rags are not big enough.
BRONZE Member
member
44 posts
Location: southampton, United Kingdom
member
44 posts
Location: southampton, United Kingdom
Posted:
It sounds to me like you've got the right idea already, you dont want that kinda guy around as your child grows up. Now the fact that he assaulted you is extreemly serious and if at all possible i would try to make sure he cant treat anyone else like this. Although you may not have the energy at the moment persue matters its worth talking to your doctor about what has happened. Then there will be a legal record of what he has done if you decide to take things further or if he tries to get access to your child.
The main thing is to keep strong and talk to people, you are the one that has been wronged and talking will help. Share your worries as much a possible, dont let this a**hole take any of your energy away from your child.
Good Luck X
It sounds to me like you've got the right idea already, you dont want that kinda guy around as your child grows up. Now the fact that he assaulted you is extreemly serious and if at all possible i would try to make sure he cant treat anyone else like this. Although you may not have the energy at the moment persue matters its worth talking to your doctor about what has happened. Then there will be a legal record of what he has done if you decide to take things further or if he tries to get access to your child.
The main thing is to keep strong and talk to people, you are the one that has been wronged and talking will help. Share your worries as much a possible, dont let this a**hole take any of your energy away from your child.
Good Luck X
SILVER Member
Running hippy spinning lemming
15 posts
Location: Scotland
Running hippy spinning lemming
15 posts
Location: Scotland
Posted:
i agree you should keep talking bout this if you can, to your doctor, family, friends... what he has done is serious and you are definately doing the right thing by distancing yourself and your child from this man,
please remember that none of this is your fault
i'm so sorry you had to go through all that... if you ever need to rant or just a chat please feel free to pm me anytime...
stay strong for yourself and your child
xxx
i agree you should keep talking bout this if you can, to your doctor, family, friends... what he has done is serious and you are definately doing the right thing by distancing yourself and your child from this man,
please remember that none of this is your fault
i'm so sorry you had to go through all that... if you ever need to rant or just a chat please feel free to pm me anytime...
stay strong for yourself and your child
xxx
Fear leads to anger; anger leads to hate; hate leads to suffering...
Carpal \'Tunnel
7,193 posts
Location: in the trees
7,193 posts
Location: in the trees
Posted:
what a total waste of space!!!! what he did to you is called rape, which ever way you look at it you where forced into something against your will. i don't know the legal in's and out's but you don't have to put his name on the birth certificate. i would talk to your doctor and tell him/her your concernes
don't let this get you down honey
what a total waste of space!!!! what he did to you is called rape, which ever way you look at it you where forced into something against your will. i don't know the legal in's and out's but you don't have to put his name on the birth certificate. i would talk to your doctor and tell him/her your concernes
don't let this get you down honey Woman! Not gay Man!
332 posts
Location: Hull...ish
332 posts
Location: Hull...ish
Posted:
this type of thing i serious enough for him to g to prisn and if not that then at lest a restraning order for you and the baby even if he is the dad
what he did was wrong and by doing it he cold have hurt youre baby... and i speekfrom experiance that i is teribble to know a guy has done this to you and got away with it Ravehead is tottaly right it is rape and I undestand that at te moment you will be in denile and it will take you long time to realise the seriousness of what he has done... you sould deffintely tell someone about this (and not just us someone who can do something about it)
If you ever need to talk to someone who partly understands what youre going through PM me and l'll get back to you as soon as I can
were all surpporting you on this one!
this type of thing i serious enough for him to g to prisn and if not that then at lest a restraning order for you and the baby even if he is the dad
what he did was wrong and by doing it he cold have hurt youre baby... and i speekfrom experiance that i is teribble to know a guy has done this to you and got away with it Ravehead is tottaly right it is rape and I undestand that at te moment you will be in denile and it will take you long time to realise the seriousness of what he has done... you sould deffintely tell someone about this (and not just us someone who can do something about it)
If you ever need to talk to someone who partly understands what youre going through PM me and l'll get back to you as soon as I can
were all surpporting you on this one!
I AM NOT A GAY MAN!
SILVER Member
with added berries
1,365 posts
Location: Manchester, England (UK)
with added berries
1,365 posts
Location: Manchester, England (UK)
Posted:
Sounds like you're much better off without out him, and you'll realise it the longer you're apart from him. Make sure you get it down on record what he did to you (rape and assult are very serious, and you don't want him to do this to anyone else), as it will help you if there are any legal problems over custordy in the future. It will be really hard, but once you've done it, you don't need to worry again. And do this as soon as possible, sad as it is, the longer you leave it, the less likley the evidence would stand up in court.
Don't worry, we all have to go through crap in our lives and it can only make you a stronger person, and know when someone thats really good for you comes along. I also have a little limited experience with this kind of thing with my ex. The best thing he ever did was disappear (literaly) and leave me, although a year and a half later he started contacting me, luckily I'd had enough time to realise what he was.
love and support x
Sounds like you're much better off without out him, and you'll realise it the longer you're apart from him. Make sure you get it down on record what he did to you (rape and assult are very serious, and you don't want him to do this to anyone else), as it will help you if there are any legal problems over custordy in the future. It will be really hard, but once you've done it, you don't need to worry again. And do this as soon as possible, sad as it is, the longer you leave it, the less likley the evidence would stand up in court.
Don't worry, we all have to go through crap in our lives and it can only make you a stronger person, and know when someone thats really good for you comes along. I also have a little limited experience with this kind of thing with my ex. The best thing he ever did was disappear (literaly) and leave me, although a year and a half later he started contacting me, luckily I'd had enough time to realise what he was.
love and support x
Live like there is no tomorrow,
dance like nobody is watching
and hula hoop like wiggling will save the world.
“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
BRONZE Member
Redneck Woman
566 posts
Location: Texas, Yeeeeehaaaaaw, USA
Redneck Woman
566 posts
Location: Texas, Yeeeeehaaaaaw, USA
Posted:
thank all of you for thee support, but what i am supposed to do when the police in my town just laughed at me? I tried to do something about it already, and they just told me they couldnt do anything at all and that i couldnt keep him from seeing the baby
thank all of you for thee support, but what i am supposed to do when the police in my town just laughed at me? I tried to do something about it already, and they just told me they couldnt do anything at all and that i couldnt keep him from seeing the baby
Top Three Things I've Learn While Being A Mom
1. Baby poop comes in many colors.
2. Makes sure all dirty diapers are not accessable to my dog.
3. Burp rags are not big enough.
Carpal \'Tunnel
7,193 posts
Location: in the trees
7,193 posts
Location: in the trees
Posted:
how sucky are the police????
sounds to me like following up on your rape allegations was going to interrupt their doughnut eating time or something.
sucky police make my blood boil!!!!
never there when needed, but if you make one minor little mistake there all over you like a bad rash.
how sucky are the police????
sounds to me like following up on your rape allegations was going to interrupt their doughnut eating time or something.
sucky police make my blood boil!!!!
never there when needed, but if you make one minor little mistake there all over you like a bad rash.
Dreamer
4,308 posts
Location: York, England
4,308 posts
Location: York, England
Posted:
Move. But you're nine months pregnant, thats prolly about the hardest time to deal with this. :/
I live somewhere where the police are the same way. And even if you get to a place where they arn't, new officers don't like dicking around with stuff from other places, or hearing about other bad officers....
Is there any kind of a shelter in your area, or that you can get to by bus? Those are, most likely, the places best equipped to dealing with these type of situations.... And if they're local they'll already know about the police, and maybe know how to get around that.
Move. But you're nine months pregnant, thats prolly about the hardest time to deal with this. :/
I live somewhere where the police are the same way. And even if you get to a place where they arn't, new officers don't like dicking around with stuff from other places, or hearing about other bad officers....
Is there any kind of a shelter in your area, or that you can get to by bus? Those are, most likely, the places best equipped to dealing with these type of situations.... And if they're local they'll already know about the police, and maybe know how to get around that.
Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive
Shalom VeAhavah
New Hampshire has a point....
Carpal \'Tunnel
7,193 posts
Location: in the trees
7,193 posts
Location: in the trees
Posted:
jesus, is every copper in the south of the U.S. a carbon copy of sheriff "boss hog" from dukes of hazzard???
i thought of coppers sucked.........all they do is hassle motorists
jesus, is every copper in the south of the U.S. a carbon copy of sheriff "boss hog" from dukes of hazzard???
i thought of coppers sucked.........all they do is hassle motorists
Dreamer
4,308 posts
Location: York, England
4,308 posts
Location: York, England
Posted:
I'm in the north. But nay mind. I think they're good in some places. I think I've even lived in one before, but i'm not sure about that.
I'm in the north. But nay mind. I think they're good in some places. I think I've even lived in one before, but i'm not sure about that.
Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive
Shalom VeAhavah
New Hampshire has a point....
SILVER Member
with added berries
1,365 posts
Location: Manchester, England (UK)
with added berries
1,365 posts
Location: Manchester, England (UK)
Posted:
The shalter idea is a good one. You don't even have to move there, but they will be able to help you and have lots of experience with people in a situation similar to yours. You might be able to phone them, or someone else for advice from people who know the local laws.
The shalter idea is a good one. You don't even have to move there, but they will be able to help you and have lots of experience with people in a situation similar to yours. You might be able to phone them, or someone else for advice from people who know the local laws.
Live like there is no tomorrow,
dance like nobody is watching
and hula hoop like wiggling will save the world.
“What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Internet Hate Machine
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
Posted:
I am but a PM away
I am but a PM away
The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
SILVER Member
Running hippy spinning lemming
15 posts
Location: Scotland
Running hippy spinning lemming
15 posts
Location: Scotland
Posted:
ra.... sorry that just makes me so angry!
please stay strong and dont give up because the stupid [censored] police are so ignorant!
it may legally be hard to 'prove' but that shouldnt distract from the fact that this was very wrong... i cant believe people could laugh... do they not understand!
please remember this is not your fault
these numbers could be helpful for advise and support for you...
America:
RAINN - The Rape Abuse & Incest National Network: 1-800-656-4673
Rape Hotline - Tel: 1-800-656-HOPE
take care of yourself and your child...
you can get through this
feel free to pm me anytime
xxx
ra.... sorry that just makes me so angry!
please stay strong and dont give up because the stupid [censored] police are so ignorant!
it may legally be hard to 'prove' but that shouldnt distract from the fact that this was very wrong... i cant believe people could laugh... do they not understand!
please remember this is not your fault
these numbers could be helpful for advise and support for you...
America:
RAINN - The Rape Abuse & Incest National Network: 1-800-656-4673
Rape Hotline - Tel: 1-800-656-HOPE
take care of yourself and your child...
you can get through this
feel free to pm me anytime
xxx
Fear leads to anger; anger leads to hate; hate leads to suffering...
Woman! Not gay Man!
332 posts
Location: Hull...ish
332 posts
Location: Hull...ish
Posted:
ohhhh I hate this....
rape aligations arent taken seriously anymore (especially if its rape in a relationship) because of all the stupid shitty women who have lied about it to get back at their boyfriends GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
we all love you and are here to help and like Psycho Lemming says ITS NOT YOURE FAULT you'll want to blame youre self at some point ( i know I did) but it's his fault whatever the situation it's his fault!
ohhhh I hate this....
rape aligations arent taken seriously anymore (especially if its rape in a relationship) because of all the stupid shitty women who have lied about it to get back at their boyfriends GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
we all love you and are here to help and like Psycho Lemming says ITS NOT YOURE FAULT you'll want to blame youre self at some point ( i know I did) but it's his fault whatever the situation it's his fault!
I AM NOT A GAY MAN!
BRONZE Member
Redneck Woman
566 posts
Location: Texas, Yeeeeehaaaaaw, USA
Redneck Woman
566 posts
Location: Texas, Yeeeeehaaaaaw, USA
Posted:
thank all of yall for all of the support. You know it is crazy that ppl ive never met in person care more than the ppl who are suppsed to uphold the law....
thank all of yall for all of the support. You know it is crazy that ppl ive never met in person care more than the ppl who are suppsed to uphold the law....
Top Three Things I've Learn While Being A Mom
1. Baby poop comes in many colors.
2. Makes sure all dirty diapers are not accessable to my dog.
3. Burp rags are not big enough.
SILVER Member
addict
667 posts
Location: Cannock, staffordshire, United Kingdom
addict
667 posts
Location: Cannock, staffordshire, United Kingdom
Posted:
i know that situation only too well
and had same treatment from the police advising me there was no point in pursuing it cos it would be thrown out of court before it got there and its pathetic its similar to date rape its rare they do anything about that either as if no physical proof meaning bruising that can be seen then they consider doing something about it but someone u have had sex with before it cant be classed as rape to them or theres no proof when the emotional scars are just as bad if not worse because you feel that person was meant to love you...
hun dont let him have anything to do with ur child and if there is any womens refuges there for domestic violence victims then go to them and they will help, i have a child from that situation and my ex being physically and sexually violent towards me and i went to refuge and im now happy in a relationship and settling down with a new man, so dont be so down on your self eithere you will find happiness soon.. i promise that
i know that situation only too well
and had same treatment from the police advising me there was no point in pursuing it cos it would be thrown out of court before it got there and its pathetic its similar to date rape its rare they do anything about that either as if no physical proof meaning bruising that can be seen then they consider doing something about it but someone u have had sex with before it cant be classed as rape to them or theres no proof when the emotional scars are just as bad if not worse because you feel that person was meant to love you...
hun dont let him have anything to do with ur child and if there is any womens refuges there for domestic violence victims then go to them and they will help, i have a child from that situation and my ex being physically and sexually violent towards me and i went to refuge and im now happy in a relationship and settling down with a new man, so dont be so down on your self eithere you will find happiness soon.. i promise that
enticed, entrapped, entombed.
intoxicated, impaled, ingested.
bewitched, beaten, broken.
enter the love realm...
insert ur token
o jej, ale bym ci wylizal ten pepek
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BRONZE Member
Sporadically Prodigal
2,758 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Sporadically Prodigal
2,758 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Posted:
So, is this rapist prick the guy you were pining for when he was in prison last year - the one you've been wanting to marry since you were 5? [Old link] want you to have anything to do with, and went through your truck and found a letter from him and stuff? Aren't you like 18 or 19 years old or something? Where are your parents/family now - surely they can help you out?
Seriously though, HoP is not the place to be asking for such serious advice. If your situation is as hard-core as you claim, I honestly think you should utilise some local resources and get professional advice on what to do.
After all, we're just a bunch of freaks who like playing with fire.
So, is this rapist prick the guy you were pining for when he was in prison last year - the one you've been wanting to marry since you were 5? [Old link] want you to have anything to do with, and went through your truck and found a letter from him and stuff? Aren't you like 18 or 19 years old or something? Where are your parents/family now - surely they can help you out?
Seriously though, HoP is not the place to be asking for such serious advice. If your situation is as hard-core as you claim, I honestly think you should utilise some local resources and get professional advice on what to do.
After all, we're just a bunch of freaks who like playing with fire.
HoP Posting Guidelines
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BRONZE Member
Redneck Woman
566 posts
Location: Texas, Yeeeeehaaaaaw, USA
Redneck Woman
566 posts
Location: Texas, Yeeeeehaaaaaw, USA
Posted:
no, he is still in prison. I had just hooked up with Marshall b/c Sean told me to move on. I really just needed support, not really advice.
no, he is still in prison. I had just hooked up with Marshall b/c Sean told me to move on. I really just needed support, not really advice.
Top Three Things I've Learn While Being A Mom
1. Baby poop comes in many colors.
2. Makes sure all dirty diapers are not accessable to my dog.
3. Burp rags are not big enough.
BRONZE Member
Sporadically Prodigal
2,758 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Sporadically Prodigal
2,758 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Posted:
Okay - fair enough... I hope everything works out okay for you heyahoney.
Okay - fair enough... I hope everything works out okay for you heyahoney.
HoP Posting Guidelines
Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?
If you can answer YES to these 4 questions then you may post a reply.
GOLD Member
Pirate Pixie Crew Captain
8,428 posts
Location: Wales
Pirate Pixie Crew Captain
8,428 posts
Location: Wales
Posted:
I thought there were 2 runners in the [Old link] to be daddy. If it's not his, he has no rights to see the child. If it is this mans, the child has a right to know who his/her father is. Hard as that maybe for you to bear it's not the childs fault. A child did not ask to be created. The child has a right to know where it has come from that includes the right to know it's father.
I thought there were 2 runners in the [Old link] to be daddy. If it's not his, he has no rights to see the child. If it is this mans, the child has a right to know who his/her father is. Hard as that maybe for you to bear it's not the childs fault. A child did not ask to be created. The child has a right to know where it has come from that includes the right to know it's father.
Feed me Chocolate!!! Feed me NOW!
SILVER Member
addict
667 posts
Location: Cannock, staffordshire, United Kingdom
addict
667 posts
Location: Cannock, staffordshire, United Kingdom
Posted:
skulduggery not in every situation does a child need to know there father
in some situations and circumstances it is better for them to not know till they are old enough to make there own minds up its called protecting them
skulduggery not in every situation does a child need to know there father
in some situations and circumstances it is better for them to not know till they are old enough to make there own minds up its called protecting them
enticed, entrapped, entombed.
intoxicated, impaled, ingested.
bewitched, beaten, broken.
enter the love realm...
insert ur token
o jej, ale bym ci wylizal ten pepek
stepped up promotions
BRONZE Member
Redneck Woman
566 posts
Location: Texas, Yeeeeehaaaaaw, USA
Redneck Woman
566 posts
Location: Texas, Yeeeeehaaaaaw, USA
Posted:
i had to get a ambeosentesis and marshall made me get a dna test. it is his
i had to get a ambeosentesis and marshall made me get a dna test. it is his
Top Three Things I've Learn While Being A Mom
1. Baby poop comes in many colors.
2. Makes sure all dirty diapers are not accessable to my dog.
3. Burp rags are not big enough.
BRONZE Member
Pooh-Bah
2,084 posts
Location: melbourne, victoria, australia
Pooh-Bah
2,084 posts
Location: melbourne, victoria, australia
Posted:
ok, i'm really not sure of what the legal issues with having marshall's name on the birth cert are, but you should be able to get an intervention order (or maybe they're called restraining orders in the US?) even if you aren't able to prove that he abused you. it is a horrible feeling not being taken seriously be the cops, who are paid to protect you, and i'm sorry that you had to go through that.
there is a huge misconception about the amount of women that lie about rape for revenge, this myth is usually perpetuated by the rapists and their friends so that the claims aren't taken seriously. however rape claims are taken a lot more seriously thesedays then in the past, especially marital rape, which wasn't considered a crime for a long time. there is a much higher number of people who don't report rapes at all then there are people that falsly report rapes. (I'm not trying to have a go at you, it's just one of those things i get fired up about)
ok, i'm really not sure of what the legal issues with having marshall's name on the birth cert are, but you should be able to get an intervention order (or maybe they're called restraining orders in the US?) even if you aren't able to prove that he abused you. it is a horrible feeling not being taken seriously be the cops, who are paid to protect you, and i'm sorry that you had to go through that.
Written by: thegreatBJ
rape allegations arent taken seriously anymore (especially if its rape in a relationship) because of all the stupid shitty women who have lied about it to get back at their boyfriends
there is a huge misconception about the amount of women that lie about rape for revenge, this myth is usually perpetuated by the rapists and their friends so that the claims aren't taken seriously. however rape claims are taken a lot more seriously thesedays then in the past, especially marital rape, which wasn't considered a crime for a long time. there is a much higher number of people who don't report rapes at all then there are people that falsly report rapes. (I'm not trying to have a go at you, it's just one of those things i get fired up about)
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