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NYC


NYC

NYC
Location: NYC, NY, USA

Total posts: 9232
Posted:OK, I'm kind of walking on eggshells here. But that's actually the point ... of sorts. I'm also hoping I'm not going to start a conversation that steps over the line of good taste or HoP appropriateness.



I'm often surprised at how similar many of the poi communities are throughout Great Britain and the US (Sorry, the only two I know!). There are many overlying similarities. If you'll allow me the luxuries of some RASH generalizations with some obvious exceptions I'd be appreciative.



IN GENERAL, the similarities include:

An acceptance of counter culture (We don't all shop at the mall)

A liberal political stance (Bush is a 4 letter word)

Tolerance of race, gender, and sexual orientation and nationality (Except "America" is a bit of a bully wink )

Open tolerance for alcohol and um...

Ties to parties, certain types of music, and even heavy use of internet communities...



I could go on, but let's not get bogged down with that.



I have noticed one stark difference though. And I'm guessing it's cultural, which makes it perhaps more interesting.



Sex.



Wait, hear me out. I'm positive that there is plenty of quality nookie going on in the UK. I'm sure of it. It's just not as openly intertwined in this particular counterculture as it is here. I know it's lots to do with the underlying Burningman experience in which sex is very out in the open, and even more advertised and behind closed domes. I actually don't take part in that aspect of the community here but it's always a bit alarming when I'm in the UK and that entire theme is gone.



It's difficult for me to go into detail without stepping over the line, but, for example... You know how at EJC and PLAY there are all sorts of workshop lists for learning beginning hula hooping or advanced hyperloops... well at festivals here there are WORKSHOPS... where you can learn things or just practice. [Leaves that one to your imagination.] There is even strict security making sure that kids don't wander into the wrong areas. A few of my friends out here indirectly or directly work in or around the sex industry.



I never really thought of that as an American thing. But, I'm slowly learning that it might very well be. Again, I'm talking about the overtness and frankness. I was initially confused because I never really thought of mainstream Americans as being more liberal than mainstream Brits. So I didn't really understand how liberal Brits would be just as liberal in all areas except one.



I have actually run into some mini faux pas joking about it. It seems to be the "Elephant in the room" sometimes (that's the analogy where there's an elephant in the room but nobody wants to talk about it), whereas in the US the elephant will be advertised on the event flyer.



When my American posse rolls into a party or festival, I feel like we walk in the door and are given a Menu. Some do this, some go for that, some do this because they did that last time. I always order the same thing "Chill with my girlfriend, spin some fire, a medium hula hoop, no orgies, no cigarettes, no drugs, and a vodka tonic please" and that works great for me no matter what country I'm in. I'm just kind of surprised when I go to UK events that sex, even if it is going on, isn't on the Menu.



Am I right? Am I wrong? Or am I just not opening the Green Door?


Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]

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Sethis
BRONZE Member since May 2005

Sethis

Pooh-Bah
Location: York University

Total posts: 1762
Posted:Sounds like a good idea. I can get slightly irritated by people who will happily smoke, drink and do pretty much anything BUT talk about sex.

It's fun, we all do it (well, most), and... yeah. It's fun!

Guess you're right. Maybe I should come over to America sometime. wink


After much consideration, I find that the view is worth the asphyxiation.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I may disagree with what you have to say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it.

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Doc Lightning
GOLD Member since May 2001

Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

Total posts: 13920
Posted:I think it depends, NYC, on the nature of the festival. EJC is the European Juggling Convention. So to have, say, a tantric masturbation course there wouldn't exactly be thematic, would it?

It's not that Europeans don't do sex or aren't demonstrative about it, although I do see less overtness there, probably because it's just an accepted part of life, but it's that they don't have Burning Man.


-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

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bender
GOLD Member since Nov 2001

still can't believe it's not butter
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Total posts: 6979
Posted:yeah everyone has heard of it but where the difference lies is the type of stork babies come in - it depends on what country you live in.

Laugh Often, Smile Much, Post lolcats Always

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Doc Lightning
GOLD Member since May 2001

Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

Total posts: 13920
Posted:What is the wing speed of an Australian Stork?

-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

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ben-ja-men
GOLD Member since Jun 2003

ben-ja-men

just lost .... evil init
Location: Adelaide

Total posts: 2474
Posted:depends an eastern stork or a western stork?

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourself, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous and talented? Who are you NOT to be?

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KaelGotRice
GOLD Member since Jul 2003

KaelGotRice

Basu gasu bakuhatsu - because sometimes buses explode
Location: Angel's Landing, USA

Total posts: 1584
Posted:Who said SEX?

*this bewildered american wanders around.


To do: More Firedrums 08 video?
Wildfire/US East coast fire footage
LA/EDC glow/fire footage
Fresno fire

<img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/ubbrollsmile.gif" alt="" />

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JayKitty
GOLD Member since Nov 2004

JayKitty

Mission: Ignition
Location: Central New Jersey

Total posts: 534
Posted:no no no, it's the SOUTHERN purple backed australian tiger stork (usually males) that deliver the babies. See, by delivering human babies they carry out a timeless mating ritual that says to the females " I can deiver a baby the fastest, can we have sex now?" But anyway they can fly at speeds of up to 35mph. I don't know what that is in kilometers.

Crazy Brits and your logical system of measurements.
(That almost rhymes!)

Also on the topic. I agree that in general the poi and other assorted associated arts comminity is really open and tolerant with a lot of things. As for the sex part, I've never really had the pleasure of traveling, but in my experiences, it's one sexual inuendo after another with my friends. It's all good times.


Don't mind me, just passing through.

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DrBoo
BRONZE Member since Oct 2005

DrBoo

I invented the decaffinated coffee table.
Location: Cornwall

Total posts: 453
Posted:I used to work with people with sexual health problems (from a therapeutic point of view). I loved really enjoyed the placement - and most sexual health problems are notoriously easy to treat with very simply techniques.

But outside of the clinic it was a very odd experience - I found myself talking about sex much more openly than is considered "proper" in british society - I'd get odd looks, and I'd suddenly realised that I could not longer see that "invisible line" - I'd trodden all over it.

The mentally regarding sex in this country drives me insane - more regarding how children learn about it, or not. (I think it's a generational problem - my generation seem to talk about it a bit more than previous ones). But this lack of open discussion is how a million myths get started. How long has it taken for the government to back down on the issue of homosexuality being discussed in schools? (And some county councils have kept the section in place so that homosexuality cannot be "promoted".

I believe that the lack of people talking about sex truthfully and openly to younger people in this country is one of the big reasons we have such a problem with STDs - kids (and adults) don't know that you can catch these if you're practicing "safe sex" (ie non penatrative sex) but not using a condom. This really riles me up. It takes a matter of minutes to explain this to people, and how and when they should wrap it up....(early, folks. As early as possible) wink

However, I had the impression that America was much the same regarding how little sex was talked about in society. I thought that sex was not an openly discussed subject over the pond either. (Similarily, I always had the impression that the US think that we in the land of uk drink far too much cos we'll have more than one drink a night). I am getting the impression that, on both points, I may have been mislead.

Although I have to admit that my knowledge of America comes from watching too much Friends. redfaceTrying to rebalance my knowledge with Will and Grace wink

Rant over biggrin


Boo x

I intend to live forever - so far, so good.

If it costs "a penny for your thoughts", but people give you their "two-pence worth", who is getting the extra penny?

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Tao Star


Tao Star

Pooh-Bah
Location: Bristol

Total posts: 1662
Posted:i can only speak for myself here of course...but i would say sex is a huge part of it!

i'm willing to chat to pretty much anyone about pretty much anything...torture garden, fetish stuff, anything really!

i think that people here like the mysique a bit more though...personally all the americans i have slept with (except one) i really found way over the top (this is just for me...not a critiscism!), not that they embarassed me, or went to far or anything, just the openess about it suddenly made me about 1/2 as interested in it....i guess what i'm trying to say is it made them come across as a little desperate.

in this country i think there is definately a leaning toeard not talking about it and therefore it being a bit more fun chasing eacother. (Me & adam being a prime example of people who actually lived together and blatantly wanted it for a whole month before we made it in to bed. ubblol


I had a dream that my friend had a
strong-bad pop up book,
it was the book of my dreams.

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Dr_Molly


Dr_Molly

Pooh-Bah
Location: Away from home

Total posts: 2354
Posted:NYC - a sweeping generalisation or two for you before I sweep out of the room:



your community is mainly liberal arty types with fire spinning as another expressive outlet (along with the kinky)



my community is basically juggling geeks wink





what do you think?



ps. I like the way this thread skirted round the subject in a stork-based direction to start with smile


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bluecat


bluecat

geek, level 1
Location: everywhere

Total posts: 5300
Posted:repressed juggling geeks, thank you very much!

and beltane-ites. jesus. i can't believe he's saying this and he's going out with the may queen! NYC you out to get over here a little more, in, say, april.


aaaaaahahahahahahahah!!!!!!!!!!!! *laughs long and hard*


Holistic Spinner (I hope)

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Dr_Molly


Dr_Molly

Pooh-Bah
Location: Away from home

Total posts: 2354
Posted:yeah - I told him about Beltane when we were talking about this last night.



But getting naked and painty and naked hippies frolicking on a hillside once a year doesn't cut that American mustard apparently shrug wink



And anyway - most of them can't juggle won't juggle so they don't count tongue



And I'm Not that sort of queen :haughty pout:


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bluecat


bluecat

geek, level 1
Location: everywhere

Total posts: 5300
Posted:ubblol

too true.

the british have always been a bit more 'keeping to themselves', i reckon.
we don't talk about illness either like the americans do.

incidentally, kenns mom once said to tree
"my fanny's been sore all night and all day"

proof that whichever way yu understand that word, americans talk about it more.

wink

i know you're not that sort of queen kiss


Holistic Spinner (I hope)

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_Clare_
BRONZE Member since Oct 2002

_Clare_

Still wiggling
Location: Belfast

Total posts: 5967
Posted:ubblol

Ok, more gross generalisations (but you started it NYC tongue)...

Doesn't everything have to bigger, brighter and brasher in America (isn't that the basic idea behind BM?)

Just because it's not shouted from the rooftops and advertised on flyers in the UK and Ireland, doesn't mean it isn't done.

Some people find such things, when it's constantly in your face, quite intense - and surely it's preferable to maintain a community that doesn't exclude anyone?

Subtlety works too smile


Getting to the other side smile

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Skulduggery
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

Skulduggery

Pirate Pixie Crew Captain
Location: Wales

Total posts: 8428
Posted:runs in, snogs Firepoise, with tongues, squeezes her butt, runs back out grinning

Feed me Chocolate!!! Feed me NOW!

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_Clare_
BRONZE Member since Oct 2002

_Clare_

Still wiggling
Location: Belfast

Total posts: 5967
Posted:Lol... see. Told you. Subtlety.

kiss for skully.


Getting to the other side smile

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Kyrian


Dreamer
Location: York, England

Total posts: 4308
Posted:You know, I was told about this when I was talking to people in York. And I thought it was a cross-cultural issue at the time, of the internal type... that the person I was talking to just hung out with far too mainstream of people. I hadn't really noticed it, except for a breif and preplexing conversation in london....

Then, I got to Fal4. And it hit me in the face like a ton of bricks. Yup, much much less open about the existence of sex. I wound up talking about this with (Kali) for a good few hours on the train trip back to London and then sitting on the bank of the thames drinking beer with her random and very fun friend. She cited it as a reason she could never stay in Britain. I think it might have been hell on me growing up, and I certainly would see it as something of a fault *but*...

One on one people are still pretty open about it, which is cool. Many people in fact seem to have a pretty decent underlying attitude about it and are just buying into the social system.
Those that don't- well, its not like they don't exist at all in america. And generally what have I got to learn from them anyway?
But it is different. And I think it makes it hard for some people... cause they've not got any idea that there's other people out there who'd be open to them given a chance....

Mainstream america talks much and does little tho. Only fringe america really seems to have those subcultures with the high comfort level. And I'd imagine they exist somewhere in britain as well..... They just don't sheild not-doing (or doing) with talking....

I'd have had more to contribute a couple months ago. But excellant point NYC


Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive

Shalom VeAhavah

New Hampshire has a point....

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NYC


NYC

NYC
Location: NYC, NY, USA

Total posts: 9232
Posted:YAY! I was worried either this thread would be banned or would have dropped down postless (perhaps further illustrating my point).

DrBoo, fantastic post. I can safely say that I believe that most of mainstream America is just as repressed as perhaps you think it is... it's just the differences within the countercultures that surprised me. Same amount of dreadlocks, beer, pot, cigarettes, protests and vegitarians... but the openness of sex was at polar opposites.

And 'repressed juggling geeks'? Hrmm... I think the fourish of Monty Python references early on gave that away. wink
Written by: Firepoise

Just because it's not shouted from the rooftops and advertised on flyers in the UK and Ireland, doesn't mean it isn't done.




But that was my point. frown

I pretty clearly said it was being done and that I'd had pretty clear proof that it was. I just said it wasn't being shouted from the rooftops.

"Just because it's not being shouted from the rooftops doesn't mean it's not being shouted from the rooftops!"

Yeah, it does. biggrin

And the 'basic idea behind burningman' certainly isn't bigger and better... it's actually got some pretty cool philosophy behind it that I wouldn't be able to adequitely describe myself.

To throw another fact out there... I was actually surprised at the difference between what is said flirtatiously on HoP vs. what's actually done. Again, this has been a bit jarring for me.

Sometimes when I read something flirty, I need to look and see where people are from before I know if they're serious. Like I know that, unfortunately, there's little chance the next time I see Skully she will have her tounge in Firepoise's mouth... and yet if someone in my community had said it, I'd have had to step over them on my way back to my tent.

Porn, sex, bondage, and other kinky topics are usually the punchline of jokes on HoP and in my posse, but the difference is that in some places, it's a serious question.

If I get an email "Hey do you want to all come over and get naked and make porn?" from UCoF, it's a joke. The exact same email from the burningman list is recruiting.

I think I was a bit surpised to see more "bark" than "bite" when it came to open sex talk among the UK crew. (Openly joking vs. actually openly doing.)

I find myself saying "no thanks" to certain events here with the same frequency of refusing a cigarette because I don't smoke. (Then quickly, people realize that you don't smoke and stop asking... "Oh wait, you don't smoke, sorry...")

I've also never had to describe where my poi fuel is as "between the bondage dome and where the naked slip and slide was" in the UK before. It's a shame, cuz it's a really good place to have to keep walking back to redunk. wink


Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]

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Kyrian


Dreamer
Location: York, England

Total posts: 4308
Posted:ubblol

yeah.....

and I get told I'm too forward by UK people all the time... and that I talk about such things too detailedly....

It is interesting, what you say about so much more flirting and less doing. I never stopped to think about that part.... I guess I always assumed it would be about the same! You've spent more time over there than i have tho.


Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive

Shalom VeAhavah

New Hampshire has a point....

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Skulduggery
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

Skulduggery

Pirate Pixie Crew Captain
Location: Wales

Total posts: 8428
Posted:Written by: NYC
Sometimes when I read something flirty, I need to look and see where people are from before I know if they're serious. Like I know that, unfortunately, there's little chance the next time I see Skully she will have her tounge in Firepoise's mouth... and yet if someone in my community had said it, I'd have had to step over them on my way back to my tent.





NYC hun you never can be sure about that one... thats what keeps it exciting.


Feed me Chocolate!!! Feed me NOW!

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fluffy napalm fairy


fluffy napalm fairy

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Brum / Dorset / Fairy Land

Total posts: 3638
Posted:I really enjoy the fact that Brits have some discretion.



It's not just about sex. Drugs, illness, relationships, secrets, experiences good and bad - we are just not as brash/loud/in your face! Then I'm also a HUGE fan of the strong and silent type, rather than the ones who run about telling everyone how strong/great/big they are and what they've had to deal with etc etc........



One thought:

I can think of two very pronounced extremes in the states that I have come in contact with:

1) No sex, sex is morally and socially wrong and you will go to hell and burn etc etc...

2) Lets all get naked, tie each other up and go mate like crazy at burningman. Oh - and where'd you put that whip?



Now, religion aside, it seems that those two will never work it out between them.

However, although those extremes certainly exist here, I think they are less pronounced, and the middleground is this "doing it but not shouting it from the rooftops" that you have described.



That's why I like it.



Also - maybe there is as much fun to be had in the "bark" - a part that the "all-biting" Americans are missing out on?

EDITED_BY: fluffy napalm fairy (1129905709)


Geologists do it in the dirt................ spank

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Durbs
BRONZE Member since Sep 2001

Durbs

Classically British
Location: Epsom, Surrey, England

Total posts: 5688
Posted:Written by: fluffy napalm fairy

Also - maybe there is as much fun to be had in the "bark" - a part that the "all-biting" Americans are missing out on?



Damn straight

Ya sexy gorgeous minx you wink
*squeezes all the girls arses and runs away*


Burner of Toast
Spinner of poi
Slacker of enormous magnitude

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TinklePants
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

TinklePants

Clique Infiltrator, Cunning Linguist and Master Debator
Location: Edinburgh burgh burrrrrr

Total posts: 4217
Posted:Sex.
I talk about it way too much anyway. I have to restrain myself at times....
*wanders off to find some porn*


Always use "so's your face" and "only on Tuesdays" in as many conversations possible

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Seye
SILVER Member since Mar 2005

Seye

Geek
Location: Manchester, UK

Total posts: 1261
Posted:Written by: NYC

I can safely say that I believe that most of mainstream America is just as repressed as perhaps you think it is... it's just the differences within the countercultures that surprised me. Same amount of dreadlocks, beer, pot, cigarettes, protests and vegitarians... but the openness of sex was at polar opposites.



This statement needs to be edited. While British attitudes may be less forward when it comes to sex no other nation in the world consumes drugs like the Brits. (all drugs, alcohol included)

In fact most people I've met from the other side of the pond cant even begin to imagine what a 'normal weekend' for millions of Brits is like. (I know a few statesiders who come over here regularly to party in peace)


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Kyrian


Dreamer
Location: York, England

Total posts: 4308
Posted:Americans bark and bite tho, they're not missing out on that specifically.

For some people it does seem to work out. But for a lot of people there's a lot of unresolved issues a little more biting might help clear up me thinks...

And shame != discretion. Americans could use a little more discretion, on many things, and more politness and manners as well (imo) but that doesn't mean we have to go so far as the elephant in the room syndrome....


Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive

Shalom VeAhavah

New Hampshire has a point....

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coleman
SILVER Member since Aug 2002

coleman

big and good and broken
Location: lunn dunn, yoo kay

Total posts: 7330
Posted:it took me ages to write this and while i was writing it, a fairy said what i wanted to very concisely and eloquently.



kyrian - i agree that discretion is not equal to shame.

there is a huge difference between being overly reserved and simply being discreet.

we are not saying it happens any less here - just that it is less openly referred to.





Written by: NYC


If I get an email "Hey do you want to all come over and get naked and make porn?" from UCoF, it's a joke. The exact same email from the burningman list is recruiting.



I think I was a bit surpised to see more "bark" than "bite" when it came to open sex talk among the UK crew. (Openly joking vs. actually openly doing.)





i think this issue resolves to the difference between 'flirting' on either side of the pond and, to a lesser extent, the fact that the scene is less attached to the 'free love' attitude here as it is in the u.s.



flirting in the u.k. is a friendly and oftentimes ultimately harmless activity that often occurs between friends or acquaintances - whether they are single or not.

the 'serious flirting' (i.e. open propositioning) that nyc says occurs in the u.s. (i can't comment cos i ain't seen it) is more based around an 'open relationship' kind of scenario which i for one am glad does not come packaged with the spinning scene here.



i am happy flirting both online and in-person with my friends.

i am happy to flirt with straight and gay friends alike (with no implied connection to my actual sexual orientation) and, since i do not expect them to take my remarks seriously, i do not feel uncomfotable doing this kind of flirting, even around my partner.



often, the flirting that goes on between single spinners does go somewhere - but usually it is acted upon in private, between two people that don't subsequently feel the need to advertise it to everyone that they know....

bark, bite, smile at each other - not bark, bite, shout about it from the rooftops.



if flirting more often than not led to an actual sexual encounter (as nyc claims it does in america), i for one would not take part in it at all now which for me, would be a sad loss.



of course, that all might just be in my head - it could be nyc, that you're simply hanging around the wrong people in the uk or have been looking in the wrong places...



how many squat parties did you go to during your last visit?

that's where the real free love hippies are at here man and lots of them don't spin - its the free parties that bring about the free love wink

and did you check out the metal/spinner/fetish scene crossover at all - its small but they ain't scared of talking about it if you ask... smile



i totally agree that open sex on offer is definitely less of an integral part of the spinning scene here.



i think, for the better, that sex may well be less of an intrinsic part of just about any niche culture you care to mention in the u.k. - not that it isn't there, just that it is not a prominent reason to get into any particular scene.



as a prime example of this, i would wager that there is a much higher percentage of people in the u.s. that took up the fire arts 'to get laid' than there is in the u.k.



personally, if i wanted an open sexual policy within the scene i spend my time in, i would aim for that specifically (i.e. fetish scenes, tantric groups, swingers and so on) - rather than take up an alternative activity in the knowledge/hope that sexual attitudes are more open within those circles.



personally, i like the fact that spinning in the u.k. does not come packaged with open sexual promiscuity and assumptions about your attitudes towards it.



spinning is one of the few activities in which the participants do not discriminate on the grounds of 'looks'.

when sex is involved, that massively positive attribute cannot help but be lessened.



personally, i would never want that to change.



but maybe i'm just a repressed geek juggler.

or maybe i just don't give a sh!t because i got me a *really* hot girlfriend ubblove wink





cole. x

EDITED_BY: coleman (1129908248)


"i see you at 'dis cafe.
i come to 'dis cafe quite a lot myself.
they do porridge."
- tim westwood

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NYC


NYC

NYC
Location: NYC, NY, USA

Total posts: 9232
Posted:Written by: fluffy napalm fairy

I really enjoy the fact that Brits have some discretion.

It's not just about sex. Drugs, illness, relationships, secrets, experiences good and bad - we are just not as brash/loud/in your face! Then I'm also a HUGE fan of the strong and silent type, rather than the ones who run about telling everyone how strong/great/big they are and what they've had to deal with etc etc........

One thought:
I can think of two very pronounced extremes in the states that I have come in contact with:
1) No sex, sex is morally and socially wrong and you will go to hell and burn etc etc...
2) Lets all get naked, tie each other up and go mate like crazy at burningman. Oh - and where'd you put that whip?

Now, religion aside, it seems that those two will never work it out between them.
However, although those extremes certainly exist here, I think they are less pronounced, and the middleground is this "doing it but not shouting it from the rooftops" that you have described.

That's why I like it.

Also - maybe there is as much fun to be had in the "bark" - a part that the "all-biting" Americans are missing out on?



Hrmm... I think you're missing a point of mine... or maybe you're not.

1) It AIN'T me. I'm very conservative in what sexy things I do in public. That's what bedrooms are for (and living rooms and...) wink Many folks I know DON'T take part of that part of the menu. BUT it's always present. I am definitely between what Fluffy describes as 1 and 2 and I'd say that most of mainstream america is also.

2) I completely disagree that liberal Brits have more discression about drugs or sexual orientation other 'liberal' topics. Which is the main point of what I was saying.

My confusion is the specific areas in which the Brits seem to be less discretionary aren't consistant.

A silly mental experiment at your favorite festival/party...
a) Walk out of a back room/tent and say "We're going to be giving out free pot in the back room in 10 minutes to anyone who wants" and hold up the bag of pot.

I have a feeling a line would start to form that would be just as long in the US as in the UK. The same sized line for "Free vegitarian chili" or "Sign our petition against the war in Iraq" or "Legalize gay marrage" or "Magical Dreadlock Beautifying cream" biggrin

b) Same party, same vibe, walk out and say "We're going to offer a workshop on (insert sexual workshop here) in 10 minutes" and hold up a bag of condoms.

I think a line would form in the US and the club would go dead quiet in the UK. wink

It's not the liberalism, it's the discrepancy within the topics that confuses me.

3) In the same way that some may be suggesting that 'discression is sexy', which I completely agree with... I wonder if there isn't some dishonesty with keeping sex so hidden in the liberal UK society.

I always joke that I never want to be at a party where I'm the most exciting person. That's why I love the PLAY festival as much as Burningman regional events out here... I always feel like I'm a bit on the conservative side of the spectrum and it gets me out of my shell which I LIKE. It does make me feel a bit awkward when I feel like I'm somewhere more conservative than I am.


Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]

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Durbs
BRONZE Member since Sep 2001

Durbs

Classically British
Location: Epsom, Surrey, England

Total posts: 5688
Posted:Personally I'm glad of this...

Sex is something that should be open in terms of discussion, but then equally is still a very personal thing and should retain this "sacred" aspect to it. Yes it can be fun, but equally it can be the most "joining" experience in a relationship.

Having it so open to me negates this somewhat - whereas the British approach of discussing it publically in a very light-hearted, often joking way keeps the fun side and the sensual side definitely seperate.]

I'm not saying it shouldn't be out in the open - but then it shouldn't be regarded as something to be picked up for free at a festival cos some stoned hippies stolen a 24 pack of Durex.

But this is just me who's got a stunning lady who I'm very much in love with...

(Again I get the feeling I've missed the point somewhat of this thread...)


Burner of Toast
Spinner of poi
Slacker of enormous magnitude

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NYC


NYC

NYC
Location: NYC, NY, USA

Total posts: 9232
Posted:Written by: coleman

personally, i like the fact that spinning in the u.k. does not come packaged with open sexual promiscuity and assumptions about your attitudes towards it.




I think you're missing a bit.

I've never felt pressured to participate in that part of the society. The same way that I've never felt pressure to take part in the drug culture even though it's prevelant in both.

It's just as easy for me to say 'no thanks' to pot as it is for open sex. I've never felt opressed.

I don't think that the scene comes 'packaged' any more than the UK comes packaged with drugs. I'm sure that there are folks that just hanging around the US scene for sex as there are hanging around the UK and US scene for drugs.

Bah.. I gotta run...


Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]

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Richee
BRONZE Member since Jan 2002

HOP librarian
Location: Prague

Total posts: 1841
Posted:I hope that UCoF will read it all. smile

POI THEO(R)IST

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Page: 12

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