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VampyricAcidSILVER Member
veteran
1,286 posts
Location: My House, United Kingdom


Posted:
Now we all reamember the horros of the other jokes thread, so lets not repeat that please, keep em clean and nice, but geeky jokes make me laugh and giggle, why cos they're funny and sometiems pretty clever, and a lot of people dont get em, if that makes me a geek then im embrace my geekishness, but i found this and thought i'd share cos its quite funny



Sung to Beatles "Let it Be":



When I find my code in tons of trouble,

Friends and colleagues come to me,

Speaking words of wisdom:

"Write in C."



As the deadline fast approaches,

And bugs are all that I can see,

Somewhere, someone whispers:

"Write in C."



Write in C, write in C,

Write in C, oh, write in C.

LISP is dead and buried,

Write in C.



I used to write a lot of FORTRAN,

For science it worked flawlessly.

Try using it for graphics!

Write in C.



If you've just spent nearly 30 hours

Debugging some assembly,

Soon you will be glad to

Write in C.



Write in C, write in C,

Write in C, yeah, write in C.

Only wimps use BASIC.

Write in C.



Write in C, write in C

Write in C, oh, write in C.

Pascal won't quite cut it.

Write in C.



Guitar Solo



Write in C, write in C,

Write in C, yeah, write in C.

Don't even mention COBOL.

Write in C.



And when the screen is fuzzy,

And the editor is bugging me.

I'm sick of ones and zeros,

Write in C.



A thousand people swear that T.P.

Seven is the one for me.

I hate the word PROCEDURE,



Write in C.

Write in C, write in C,

Write in C, yeah, write in C.

PL1 is 80s,



Write in C.

Write in C, write in C,

Write in C, yeah, write in C.

The government loves ADA,

Write in C.





heeheee

Now remember people, there are 10 types of people in the world, those who understand binary and those who don't!

Proudly Owned By The BMVC

Are You Sniffing My Mitten?


doctor_fandangoGOLD Member
co-director of A.C.B.I.S.H.A.
761 posts
Location: in the corner beside the filing cabinets, 2nd floo...


Posted:
HAHAHAHAHAAA!!
not so geeky , but its maths anyways

There's no place like 127.0.0.1, There's no place like 127.0.0.1, There's no place like 127.0.0.1,

"in most of our friends we're the hippies. but we have hippie friends of our own.. its like a dog having its own pet" - H. Sinoquet 19-03-2005


doctor_fandangoGOLD Member
co-director of A.C.B.I.S.H.A.
761 posts
Location: in the corner beside the filing cabinets, 2nd floo...


Posted:
Two American Football teams are on a tour of Europe and have a quiz to see which team can name most places in Holland. The game was won by a single Dutch Town.

There is evidence that William Tell and his family were avid bowlers, but unfortunately all the league records were destroyed in a fire.
Thus we'll sadly never know for whom the Tells bowled

ouch.

There's no place like 127.0.0.1, There's no place like 127.0.0.1, There's no place like 127.0.0.1,

"in most of our friends we're the hippies. but we have hippie friends of our own.. its like a dog having its own pet" - H. Sinoquet 19-03-2005


KyrianDreamer
4,308 posts
Location: York, England


Posted:
aw, i don't get teh first one frown

Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive

Shalom VeAhavah

New Hampshire has a point....


doctor_fandangoGOLD Member
co-director of A.C.B.I.S.H.A.
761 posts
Location: in the corner beside the filing cabinets, 2nd floo...


Posted:
its baaaad!, its american football right, in American Football you score by making a Touch Down ~ Dutch Town

There's no place like 127.0.0.1, There's no place like 127.0.0.1, There's no place like 127.0.0.1,

"in most of our friends we're the hippies. but we have hippie friends of our own.. its like a dog having its own pet" - H. Sinoquet 19-03-2005


SkulduggeryGOLD Member
Pirate Pixie Crew Captain
8,428 posts
Location: Wales


Posted:
ok this isn't a geeky joke but it was on a bag I got from Woolworths today....

How do Sheep keep warm in the winter?


The turn on the central bleating.






yes I know, why did the bother?

Feed me Chocolate!!! Feed me NOW!


KyrianDreamer
4,308 posts
Location: York, England


Posted:
ugh... ugh.. ugh...

and you know, i made american football be "an american soccer team", as such, in my head... oh am i useless...

Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive

Shalom VeAhavah

New Hampshire has a point....


Motaddict
666 posts
Location: Netherlands


Posted:
Jonney was a scientist,
but jonney is no more,
what jonney thought was H2o
was H2sO4

I heard that joke beforew i knew what it ment and then burst into a fit of laughter one day during chemistry class smile

Come forth and thou shalt win enternal happiness. but he came fifth so he won an electric toatser.


Motaddict
666 posts
Location: Netherlands


Posted:
yoni -
roses are #0000ff
violets are #ff0000
and all your base are belong to us

Unfortunantly i laughted myself silly at that one biggrin

Come forth and thou shalt win enternal happiness. but he came fifth so he won an electric toatser.


MotleyGOLD Member
addict
434 posts
Location: UK


Posted:
lol

Hello fellow Mot btw cool

Motaddict
666 posts
Location: Netherlands


Posted:
Following on from the pizza one,
A budist monk walks into a pizza hut and says
"make me one with everything"

Come forth and thou shalt win enternal happiness. but he came fifth so he won an electric toatser.


SeyeSILVER Member
Geek
1,261 posts
Location: Manchester, UK


Posted:
I cant believe that no-one has posted this already...


Non-Https Image Link

MikeGinnyGOLD Member
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA


Posted:
Three engineers, one electrical, one mechanical, and one civil are debating what sort of engineer God was.

The electrical engineer argued that, with the complexities of the nervous system, God must be an electrical engineer.

The mechanical engineer pointed out the ingenious arrangement of joints, tendons, and muscles and said that God must be a mechanical engineer.

The civil engineer piped in and said "No, clearly God is a civil engineer!" Both the electrical and mechanical engineers looked at him in askance.

"Well," said the Civil engineer, "who else puts a sewage line through a perfectly good recreational area?"

-Mike

Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella



A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura


poigmarmite and nutella sandwich
1,590 posts
Location: Farnborough, Hampshire


Posted:
This one's not so geeky, but funny anyway!!

There's a businessman, a drunk man and a soldier on a plane, but it is too heavy, so they need to drop off some luggage to prevent the plane from crashing. So, the drunk man drops out a case of beer, the business man drops out his briefcase and the soldier drops out his .grenades. When they land, the drunk man goes up to a woman who's crying and asks her what's wrong. She says "'sniff' My husband 'sniff' just got killed by a case of beer 'sniff'" the drunk man walks away feeling slightly guilty. The Businessman goes up to a man who's crying and asks him whats wrong and he says "'sniff' my husband 'sniff' just got killed by a flying briefcase. 'Sniff'", so the businessman walks away, also feeling slightly guilty. Finally, the soldier goes up to a boy who is layghing his head off. The soldier asks "What the hell is so funny?" and the boy says, laughing, "I just farted, and the building behind me (pause) BLEW UP!!! (he bursts out laughing)"

I liked your one, Doc!

THE hop Pyro.
(with parents)
Unowned


TabtI Doubt, Therefore I Might Be
1,007 posts
Location: Horsham


Posted:

I can travel through time and I do ... at the unremarkable rate of one
second per second.

yes yes laim but the only ones i know have already been said. mainly the binary ones.

oh ye. my mum likes this one (i guess she must be a geek):

a dyslexic agnostic insomniac sat up all night wondering if there was a dog...



~This message was written entirely with recycled electrons.~

Owner of Dragosani's right side.


drofkcahSILVER Member
member
80 posts
Location: Derby UK


Posted:
A dyslexic walks into a band yand yells "air in the hands mother stickers this is a censored up

I am a sig virus place me in you sig so that i can continue to replicate

Rgds Drofkcah


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