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dromepixie
dromepixie

veteran
Location: Florida
Member Since: 20th May 2002
Total posts: 1463
Posted:So here I am depressed writting to all those I love on home of poi asking for advice on life...

I am standing at the edge of a waterfall.
Its such a long way down... I am looking down and I am afraid, confused, and disorientated. I know I need to jump. I have to jump or I will loose my spirit. So where do I go, how do I jump?

Ok to make this a bit more understandable...

The jump symbolises me having to move out of my house. I cannot attain my degree now because my parents wont pay unless I live under their terms. To me living under their terms means sacrificing who I am and what I want to do. I feel trapped, imprisoned, and uncomfortable in this house. I CANNOT live under this roof anymore. That descision is made.

But now I have to jump but there are two ways I could jump.

I can move out of my house and go to some place in America (that scares me) where I would have to get a job, appartment, car, etc... All alone! I would go and make money hopefully saving some here and there so that I can do my degree at some stage.

or

I do have the option of getting married to stay in the united kingdom... now before anyone goes nuts about this one... There are reasons. I do trust the person I would be marrying not to take advantage of the situation...

I have weighed out my options and if I am moving out these are the only two things I can do that are readily at my disposal. If I got married I would move to Brighton, get a job, and a small appartment.

Now know that I dont have much money, neither do my parents. I dont know how to drive yet and know fuck all about cars... So going to the states would mean me needing to learn about those things in addition to learning how to live on my own with no family, friends, or even aquaintances around to help me. Living in Brighton would involve me getting married although I would not be living with that person.

I am so scared confused and generally mixed up about my options. I am trying to weigh it out but the scales seem evenly fucked all round...

So its time to jump...

How would you jump if you where put in my situation?

Much love and hugs, drome


JUGGLEwithyourmind!


Kali
member
Location: Berlin, Germany
Member Since: 29th Apr 2002
Total posts: 577
Posted:Drome honey,
Sorry I haven't seen this and posted sooner. just wanted to let you know that I've been in similar situations to this and in fact in one right now. I respect and admire you for the courage and initiative you're showing. Its really scaring starting off on your own anywhere. If you ever need to talk, PM me a land line where I can reach you cause I just got a really cheap calling plan for non-mobile international #s and intend to put it to good use. I would love to talk to you anyways.

Also if you decide to go to LA (which I must warn you is the 5th ring of hell), let me know and I'll have my posse look our for you, show you a good time and all that jazz. If you're anywhere on the east coast, be sure that I'll be coming around to vist and hug you lots!

Take good care, sweetie!


Beauty is the conscious sum of all our perversions.-Salvador DaliHope without action is hopeless.


dromepixie
dromepixie

veteran
Location: Florida
Member Since: 20th May 2002
Total posts: 1463
Posted:Looks like I might be going to Portland at the end of the year but thats only after I make enough starting off money!

I am probably going to Miami first to buy a car and spend time with me aunt and my 5 cousins... Then I think I might drive alone to my new home.

Fucked up but at the end of the day an adventure.

Trust sweetie my dad told me all about LA and I had two girls sit me down and tell me it was maybe the 40th gate into hell...

Much love, Drome


JUGGLEwithyourmind!


Spiral
Spiral

Oolering Man
Location: Farnborough, Hampshire
Member Since: 12th Jan 2002
Total posts: 729
Posted:As you've probably allready gathered, the jump, and how you fall don't really matter, it's how you land that counts

hugs to you drome



dromepixie
dromepixie

veteran
Location: Florida
Member Since: 20th May 2002
Total posts: 1463
Posted:I have jumped!

I am waiting to tell the accounts to those who want to listen although some reasearch is needed before the journey comences.

Ciao ciao friends,
Drome


JUGGLEwithyourmind!


Bram....
member
Location: the arms of the Ganja Goddess
Member Since: 17th May 2002
Total posts: 1551
Posted:*hits the listening on switch* go ahead

You. Its whats for dinner!

As time passes, you realise all the mistakes you amde and the ones you wish you never did make.

The wave crashing on the beach


iluminaryfaerie
member
Location: Guelph, Ontario, Camerica
Member Since: 5th Oct 2002
Total posts: 89
Posted:oops, hehehe far too late for any advice
but that's ok, cuz i think you made the right choice anyway..
you will definately learn huge amounts about yourself being on your own, and you will have to push your boundaries and step out of your comfort zone. it's situations like these where you are confronted with endless opportunities to make choices on your own, and you will be so much stronger in the end.

one thing you might want to consider though, before heading to the states, is not your future in the stats, but AMERICA's future. have you been following the news lately? america (and by america i mean the government running it) is beginning to step away from any morals it once held. i'm not trying to preach my dislike for the states, i just want you to go into it informed about how it's run and the changes that have been occuring. it's a dangerous place to be and will progressively continue to be. i'd recommend getting your hands on a movie entitled "The Truth & Lies of 9/11". you can get it off here it's not just about 9/11, it's about alot more.
it's horribly worth the $20 odd bucks

i'm not going to get into it in detail, but just make sure that you're going to a place that isn't on the verge of comming under dictatorship.

i'm sure you'll make the right choice for you, and you'll have an adventure and a half doing it good luck
*hugs to you and good vibes from canada*
gaja


orangu-funking-tan


Jade Lynx
member
Location: Laguna Beach, but i live in De...
Member Since: 19th May 2002
Total posts: 239
Posted:Hey, drome!
I wish you the best of luck with your transitions!
Some ideas for you:
In sussing out places to move, you can check out:
weather sites, see what the climate is like.
Rental search sites, to get an idea of rents in different areas of a city.
Some jobsearch sites will have a feature where you can see what the average wage is for various jobs, so you'll know how much you can make.
Free weekly sites, to see what the city is like. These are great, most cities here will have a free weekly newspaper that is, of course, rolling in ads, but has tons of info too. They usually have articles about local issues, classified ads listing jobs and housing, an entertainment section so you can scope out the clubs and pubs, a food section so ditto for restaurants, and in general you can get a feel for a city by checking them out each week for a while.
I don't know what the names are for the various papers, but every major city in the U.S. has one. For L.A., L.A. Weekly, for San Jose it's Metro, for Denver it's Westword, and so on. If you go to Westword.com, they'll have links to several others as well...
And if you come to/through Denver, let me know! We'll show you the good stuff here...


We got the MikeZ in the house, woot!Glue the ham, hat baby!


Spiral
Spiral

Oolering Man
Location: Farnborough, Hampshire
Member Since: 12th Jan 2002
Total posts: 729
Posted:I will always listen.................


Flynt
Flynt

Intrepid Penguin

Member Since: 12th May 2002
Total posts: 5635
Posted:so where is our beloved drome off to?? and how are you feeling about all this? Nervous/excited/tired/scared? or just numb???

Would love to know how you are Drome ` xoxoxox


Currently on the right side up of the world.


Thistle
Thistle

old hand
Location: Nottingham UK
Member Since: 27th Jan 2001
Total posts: 950
Posted:Sorry I'm late. Big respect to a fellow pixie for standing up for what she believes in when faced with an extremely tough choice. Congratulations in forging your own path when faced with adversity.

I am always willing to listen if you need to talk.



Are we nearly there yet?


dromepixie
dromepixie

veteran
Location: Florida
Member Since: 20th May 2002
Total posts: 1463
Posted:Spent last weekend setting up parties and getting some quite good connections... Im in a cloud right now... Well a bit of Mushies helped on that level. Am doing parties here until I leave.

All is well and happy as I have settled into the idea... It wont happen soon but it will happen within one year but I might be back depending on what happens.

I am going home as my sis is sorting me out with connections to take the four four rhythm home with me in addition to other beats and breaks. I might also start some fire stuff there. The possibilities are endless.

My spiritual journey is just beginning I can feel the light and dark all around and am seeing all sides trying to maintain the fine balance required to achieve my deepest objectives.

Many thanks to all who have helped and will help in my future. May our paths cross enlaced with harmonic tones of peace and beauty.

The rabbithole is deep but I am falling in very soon. Where I go from there no one knows not even myself, until then I take the situation as it is served and deal with it then. The world is too large to contemplate all therefore I will go seek my truth. I must see where the rabbit hole goes and then decide when I reach the other end. I might be searching for the rest of my life. Until then I will make sure and keep you guys posted.

Much love hugs and respect to the caring souls on the site,
Drome


JUGGLEwithyourmind!


dromepixie
dromepixie

veteran
Location: Florida
Member Since: 20th May 2002
Total posts: 1463
Posted:LOL

Funny how things change so fast...

I never thought that I would be in the situation I am in now... The US hasn't worked out for several reasons...

I am moving to Sheff in January this I am sure of! After that I dunno although I have many ideas and am positive that I will be in Auss towards Jun-Jul of this year (I hope)...

Anyways I thought I would dig this out the depths as I have had many experiences since this thread and find it funny how so much has changed.

Damn! I even have a totally different attitude nowadays...

well hope all is well with all!

Much love and hugs,
drome


JUGGLEwithyourmind!


primative_toys
happy hunting
Location: Brisnyland
Member Since: 7th Dec 2002
Total posts: 228
Posted:even though the path ahead may be rocky and full of holes, try to let go of the rains and trust the beasts that forge ur journey, for without them the journey may be slow and arguous. full of knowledge and wisdom you begin a new portion of ur life kelly. u may not know it now but when u look back upon this time u will realise u have already leapt (or been pushed) from the cliff that is the rabbit hole. enjoy the ride and release ur fear for ur angels will protect u and guide u from misfortune.
with much love, trust and admiration
mythmitch
i will see u through as will the rest of the HOP peoples, we will not have it any other way.


regret nothing, learn everything

fire_light_movement


FireSpirit
FireSpirit

Classic 90's Fire Dancer... Poi, Staff, Doubles, and Breathing
Location: South Lake Tahoe
Member Since: 29th Mar 2001
Total posts: 743
Posted:That was Beautiful fi-primate-re!!
Yes, Follow your Bliss (what you Love), and Doors will open where there where no doors before.
Trust in the Path you have set your feet upon.
There are many forks on the Path, but they all lead to the Level road.
Good Luck in whatever you do, we are with you.

~Fire Spirit


FIRE IS ALIVE!
IT LIVES AND BREATHS!
IT CONSUMES, AND DISTROYS!
BUT WE CONTROL IT,
AND DANCE WITH FIRE!!


primative_toys
happy hunting
Location: Brisnyland
Member Since: 7th Dec 2002
Total posts: 228
Posted:quote: Follow your Bliss (what you Love), and Doors will open where there where no doors before. this is excellent advise,
(*mistevously smiles as his own agenda comes into play*)

cheers firespirit
mythmitch


regret nothing, learn everything

fire_light_movement


dromepixie
dromepixie

veteran
Location: Florida
Member Since: 20th May 2002
Total posts: 1463
Posted:I will follow love to the depths of the ocean for it has always called me.

I am quite speachless right now and dont quite know what to say...

I love you.
drome


JUGGLEwithyourmind!


orange
member
Location: england
Member Since: 7th Nov 2001
Total posts: 158
Posted:when you come upon a fork in the road ... don't stand on it ...
i stood on a rake once .... once ...

well happy Sheffield opens its arms to you Drome

i spoke to you yesterday and my orange toycave is all Pixie ready for a visit

can't promise too much bouncing for a while - but plenty of smiles

Merry crimble all and hopes to a fully filled new-year too


swoopedinandswoopedoutagain...orange...xxx...


primative_toys
happy hunting
Location: Brisnyland
Member Since: 7th Dec 2002
Total posts: 228
Posted:hello orange...
ummm.. introductions.. hi...
thought id just ...
anyways nice to meet you...
mythmitch


regret nothing, learn everything

fire_light_movement


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