Forums > Social Chat > The Official Male HoP Auction!
Login/Join to ParticipateIntrepid Penguin
5,635 posts
Location: Australia
Step roight up step roight up Lady HoPpers!
Here on the Auction Block today we 'ave two fine Male HoP specimins!
Firstly we 'ave the scrumptious pozee. His interests include poi, staff and firebreathing! His current occupation involves making things explode, and he's 24 years old! Lets face it ladies, this is one hot honey!
Also up for grabs today, is a lushbucket we all know as Raymond Phule! This young stud makes his living by being a Marine, at the tender age of 21! His interests are poi and staff, and he loves a good debate!
Soooooo ladies! step up now, dunt be shy, they wont bite unless you want them too.... what am i bid????
Currently on the right side up of the world.
313 posts
Location: london,uk
well,we of the woodland folk living in shepherds bush could certainly use a puk to brighten things up,so i bid...........a cosy tree house,a banana,mango an strawberry smoothie,a bag full of pixie dust,birdsong(its early morning here and they are insisting i mention their amazing singing...)and........endless supply of hugs!!!!
paranoid of gov't conspiracies
217 posts
Location: USA
ohh for puk i would bid a homemade apple pie, forrest gump the movie,a papaya, 5 back massages and more stuff to come as i think of them!~
,Christina
EDITED_BY: firekitty (1076658172)
Intrepid Penguin
5,635 posts
Location: Australia
Quote:
*Jumps in Flynts lap and settles down in new home in Melburp in the sun shine*
WOO! just what I always wanted!
*proceeds to start applying butterfly kisses to CustomBug....*
Currently on the right side up of the world.
playing the days away
7,263 posts
Location: The Middle lands, United Kingdom
ooohoooo.....that tickles......stop it....no don't.....oooh it tickles.....stop it.....no dont stop......
Man I lurve the butterflies.......
*Bug starts to purr and feels very safe and comfy in Flynts lap*
Let's relight this forum 
1,079 posts
Location: Canterbury, UK
well, i guess no one will raise mike so...
SOLD!!! TO THE GENTLEMAN IN THE BLOOD STAINED LAB COAT!!!
D.B.
X x X x X
Ship off the starboard! sound general quarters! noise and light discipline! man the cannons! GET ME THE RUM!
Master of the Free Hug Program
Tantamount to fatuity
15,966 posts
Location: Down the road, United Kingdom
bump
Meh
1,359 posts
Location: London/ Surrey
Heh... I'll bid on any male that's willing to lug my scuba kit around Florida for me in October
The optimist claims that we are living in the best of all possible worlds.
The pessimist fears this is true.
Always make time to play in the snow.
Self-Flagellation Expert
3,414 posts
Location: Bogged at CG, Australia
*debates on whether or not to auction self*
"beg beg grovel beg grovel"
"master"
--FSA
"There was an arse there, i couldn't help myself"
--Rougie
Carpal \'Tunnel
4,172 posts
Location: Hastings, United Kingdom
oh MiG!
I've got a mint KitKat, some banana's and the latest issue of the beano if you can come and fix my computer for me?
EDITED_BY: *Aimée* (1092738644)
member
169 posts
Location: Paris, France, the armpit of europe
i only had to read the title of this thread to know it was my destiny to post here.
yes, i, I the french, the beautiful, the flaming Yannicus, am up for auction, bidding starts at negative one hundred thousand euro, yes, that does mean i pay you
-Believing that all has been said and done is like mistaking the horizon for the limits of the world. Voltaire.
-Plus je connais hommes, plus j'aime mon chien. Pascal.
Pirate Ninja
3,882 posts
Location: Galway/Ireland
hmmm,
I could never sell myself, but if anybody would like to claim me, i would then be theirs and could be sold off accordingly.
I'm fully toilet trained, can use both a knife and a fork and love to wiggle.
Love is the law.
suitable for vegetarians
300 posts
Location: Leeds, UK
oh gosh, we have a frenchman and an irishman to choose from?!
oooooh - can i bid for them both?
yannicus i bid for you 100,000 euro (so you don't have to pay me), a penguin hand puppet, 20 of my holiday photos, a bag of marmite crisps and a toilet seat.
ado-p how about a Fred Astaire video, a rainbow bracelet, an apple, yellow sunglasses and a small clock with cats on it?
So what can you guys do for us?
I need a man who can...........
*fix my computer (like aimee)
*teach me to do isolations properly
*dye my hair
*put the toilet seat down again
*cook
but i'll take them both if nobody will raise me on the above!
animals who are not penguins can only wish they were
Classically British
5,689 posts
Location: Epsom, Surrey, England
Hmmm, I fit all the above, but am sadly already taken
Burner of Toast
Spinner of poi
Slacker of enormous magnitude
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
I would just like to update my entry as follows:
Non-Https Image Link
Non-Https Image Link
Ladies looking for a cabana boy are welcome to bid. Gentlemen looking for a love slave are also welcome to bid. However, ladies looking for a love slave should probably look elsewhere as we cannot guarantee satisfaction with this product when used for unlabeled purposes.
-Mike
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella
A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura
1,359 posts
Location: London/ Surrey
Since you regularly claim to be athletic, you can certainly help with my scuba stuff
Can you teach me spinny toys as well?
Willing to act as 'decoy' when out dancing to avoid nightclub sleazes? (One of my pet hates! Everybody should have a clubbing buddy
)If so I'll start the bidding at a big bar of chocolate, a pair of flags (made to your specification, UV printed designs if required) or other spinny toy of choice, 3 of my bestest marbles and a shiny button.
(small bid i know, but lets not START the bidding out of my means!:D) The optimist claims that we are living in the best of all possible worlds.
The pessimist fears this is true.
Always make time to play in the snow.
456 posts
Location: Hoboken, New Jersey, USA
I'll bid a pan of Black Hole Brownies of Doom (the most intense brownies you'll ever eat), several really good books, and a nice long full-body oil massage.
(See, if I win, I will have trained you as my love slave.)
"If you didn't like something the first time, the cud won't be any good either." --Elsie the Cow, Ruminations
Super Gidg!!!!
8,506 posts
Location: Portland Oregon USA
It seems that I haven't seen this thread in ... forever. It still makes me laugh! Growing old is mandatory; growing up is NOT.
Proud member of the HoP DPS.
Sanity is a highly overrated state of mind.
I'm normal ... it's everyone else that's crazy.
Gidg
veteran
1,389 posts
Location: Guelph, ON, Canada
I'll bid.. ummm...
A matching bracelet to the necklace, and a lifetime's supply of Smarties. And take out the word "speedo" from the vocabulary of the world unless they're addressing the company name.
~ Bobo
wie weit, wie weit noch?
fragst mich, wo wir gewesen sind...
du fehlst hier
Insert Champagne Here
13,215 posts
Location: without class distinction, Australia
i'll bid a paperclip, a notepad and a pen for someone who'll give me hugs
i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey
Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...
veteran
1,389 posts
Location: Guelph, ON, Canada
I'll give hugs to Rougie for free
No biding needed for those darl!
~ Bobo
wie weit, wie weit noch?
fragst mich, wo wir gewesen sind...
du fehlst hier
456 posts
Location: Hoboken, New Jersey, USA
I'll up my bid by two containers of blood-orange marmalade and a whimsical and slightly surreal answering machine message.
"If you didn't like something the first time, the cud won't be any good either." --Elsie the Cow, Ruminations
233 posts
Location: Hexham, Newcastle, England
I have a massive ego, so I'd bappily put myself up for auction.
Unfortunatly, I don't think I'm capable of posting pics, so you'd have to assume that I look like half of Marilyn Mansons face.
Which is nice.
dxxx
PS Lightning waxes his chest, I can tell.
1,359 posts
Location: London/ Surrey
The optimist claims that we are living in the best of all possible worlds.
The pessimist fears this is true.
Always make time to play in the snow.
A Meerkat that eats chicken
194 posts
Location: Cambridge UK
ooo, ooo, ooo , i want a bid i would put a picture on here if i knew how.....butas the thread gos its only MALE which is disapointing cause i think females should be involved YAY YAY
cause there angels of society Fool
2,020 posts
Location: Cornwall, UK
Dr Mike, is that really you?
Ok, i've had enough of this relationship malarkey. Any young ladies want me?
I'll do anything (i have no shame).
I'm 6'1, dark hair and eyes, roughly 12.5 stone (90 odd kilos i think) and covered in burn marks. Oh yeah, and my favourite hobbies are (in order of preference): giving head, spinning poi, lobbing a stick about.
Bidding starts at one square of Galaxy chocolate.
"I believe the cost of life is Death and we will all pay that in full. Everything else should be a gift. We paid the cover charge of life, we were born."
Bill Hicks, February 1988
ZORT!
3,045 posts
Location: Brisbane, Australia
*purrs at mike*
"Here kitty kitty...." - Schroedinger.
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA
Written by: Mags The Jedi
Dr Mike, is that really you?
Uh huh.
Dentrassi, were you going to make a bid?
-Mike
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella
A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura
ZORT!
3,045 posts
Location: Brisbane, Australia
do accept visa?
"Here kitty kitty...." - Schroedinger.
Sporadically Prodigal
2,758 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
get a room.
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1,359 posts
Location: London/ Surrey
there's a female auction thread about that you could go and bump...
The optimist claims that we are living in the best of all possible worlds.
The pessimist fears this is true.
Always make time to play in the snow.
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