Forums > Social Chat > The HoP Book of Chat Up Lines!!!
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546 posts
Location: Leeds, United Kingdom
So your in a bar/anywhere and in frount of you u see the perfect woman/women or guy....whats the smoothist...funnyist line ur gona use???
mike.c
EDITED_BY: Dom (1115674986)
Rules and responsibities:
These are the ties that bind us.
We do what we do,because of who we are.
If we did otherwise,we would not be ourselves.
I will do what i have to do
And i will do what i must..
addict
546 posts
Location: Leeds, United Kingdom
i come with a lable from god to u!!!!!
heard it today!!!
mike.c
Rules and responsibities:
These are the ties that bind us.
We do what we do,because of who we are.
If we did otherwise,we would not be ourselves.
I will do what i have to do
And i will do what i must..
journeyman
59 posts
Location: Los Angeles, USA
I was at a bar and my friend actually used this one and made it work
"Excuse me, but my friend and I were arguing and we would like you to settle it-- do pinguens have knees?"
others that would just be funny:
"Playing doctor is for kids! Let's play gynecologist."
"Are you lost ma'am? Because heaven's a long way from here."
"Hey, let's go make some babies."
"Hi, I'm not trying to pressure you, I don't want to have sex without mutual consent; and by the way, you have my consent."
A variant of moon's-- "Nice shoes-- can I try them on after we have sex?"
"Hey somebody farted-- lets get out of here and go back to my place."
"I'm new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment?"
Performing marriages, funerals, baptisisms, last rites and absolving the sins for HoPers for-- not very long actually.
Altyd Brandend
149 posts
Location: Orange County, California, USA
you do you like your eggs in the morning?
Fried,Scrammbled,or fertilized?
And then there one about teeth but you'll have to PM me to hear it coz its not forum friendly.
"whats a girl like you doing in a nice place like this?"
"Can i buy you a drink of do you just want the money?"
LOL
"Every time i try to pick up a girl i keep making Freudian Tits."
IF they say "what is that?"
Reply with "A Freudian tit is when you say one thing but you mean your mother...but that cant be father from the truth"
OR
"Nice legs,when do they open?"
"Those are really tight pants how does one get into them?"
"I caught you a delicious bass" (SHout out to Napolean!)
EDITED_BY: Alfred (1115001131)
Spinning makes my world go round
comfortably numb
2,676 posts
Location: The countryside, Australia
I think my favourite funny one would be.
Guy to a girl.
"I'd buy you a drink but I'd be jealous of the straw"
.All things are beautiful if we take the time to look.
1,328 posts
Location: Bendigo, Vic, Australia
lol... some of these are brilliant guys.
Some guy used this on one of my sisters friends:
Walk up to a person in a bar, grab the ice out of your drink, drop it on the floor, step on it and smash it up, then say to the person "now that we've broken the ice wanna come back to my place?"
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
Written by: Alfred
"Every time i try to pick up a girl i keep making Freudian Tits."
IF they say "what is that?"
Reply with "A Freudian tit is when you say one thing but you mean your mother...but that cant be father from the truth"
thats the thing about freud.. its all ways about one thing or your mother
The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
204 posts
Location: MANCHESTER
a classic...
...why don't you sit on my lap, and we'll talk about the first thing that pops up..
I DO NOT REGRET THE THINGS I HAVE DONE, ONLY THOSE I DID NOT DO.
Your Face!
1,173 posts
Location: el paso, tx, USA
Exuse me miss, would you happen to have a quarter? I just wanted to call your parent's to tell them what a great job they did.
male- I'm like a bag of M&M's. female- Why is that? male- Because I'll melt in your mouth and not in your hand.
Can I name your thighs? That ones thanksgiving and that one's christmas. Can I come and visit you between the holiday's?
Heroism on command, senseless violence, and all the loathsome nonsense that goes by the name of patriotism - how passionately I hate them!
-Albert Einstein-
Peanut butter... It fills the cracks of the soul! -Paul Blart-
addict
546 posts
Location: Leeds, United Kingdom
the last one is ace....
mike.c
Rules and responsibities:
These are the ties that bind us.
We do what we do,because of who we are.
If we did otherwise,we would not be ourselves.
I will do what i have to do
And i will do what i must..
Snoochie-boochie-noochies!
663 posts
Location: United Kingdom
hold sign over your head: "FREE $EX! £5 A GO!"... it'll work someday
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
doesnt "free sex" and then ask for money defy the whole purpose of it being free? 
Or have i missed a joke? The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
Snoochie-boochie-noochies!
663 posts
Location: United Kingdom
free for me frd, you're paying :P
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
journeyman
59 posts
Location: Los Angeles, USA
Here are two more:
"Do you like short love affairs? I hate them. I've got all weekend."
"Brrr! My hands are cold. Can I warm them in your heaving breasts?"
And the greastes pick-up line of all time:
"So, you're a girl huh?"
Performing marriages, funerals, baptisisms, last rites and absolving the sins for HoPers for-- not very long actually.
enthusiast, but not enthusiastic
367 posts
Location: Los Angeles, California, USA
Written by: roarfire
I think my favourite funny one would be.
Guy to a girl.
"I'd buy you a drink but I'd be jealous of the straw"
Nah, that's just cheap.
You can't fall off the floor, but sometimes you need a chair to reach the cookie jar.
1,359 posts
Location: London/ Surrey
uh, they all are, cheap and tongue-in cheek... that's the point, surely?
The optimist claims that we are living in the best of all possible worlds.
The pessimist fears this is true.
Always make time to play in the snow.
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
but i wonder if anyones ever pulled with them...
seriously, ladies, what chance has a guy got with any of these lines?
EDITED_BY: Fine_Rabid_Dog (1115071324)
The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
1,359 posts
Location: London/ Surrey
No chance. Whatesoever. There's not such thing as a good 'line' (I've actually heard one or two of those used, too..eek!)
The optimist claims that we are living in the best of all possible worlds.
The pessimist fears this is true.
Always make time to play in the snow.
Pooh-Bah
2,109 posts
Location: Philadelphia, PA - USA
I think the really silly sounding ones have more chance of working than the corny ones...
For instance "So, youre a girl huh?" would be a pretty good one to at least get her giggling.
Let's turn those old bridges we crossed into ashes.
We'll blaze a new trail,
and torch the rough patches.
-Me
Pooh-Bah
2,109 posts
Location: Philadelphia, PA - USA
Also, a good one Ive heard of requires no words. You just walk up to your target lady and hand her a packet of salt then walk back to your seat and sit down. Chances are, shell come over and ask why you gave it to her.
Let's turn those old bridges we crossed into ashes.
We'll blaze a new trail,
and torch the rough patches.
-Me
journeyman
59 posts
Location: Los Angeles, USA
Written by: ICoN
Also, a good one Ive heard of requires no words. You just walk up to your target lady and hand her a packet of salt then walk back to your seat and sit down. Chances are, shell come over and ask why you gave it to her.
Yeah-- but you better have something amazing to throw at her when she gets back to your table.
Ladies--
What pick-up lines have worked on you? Or if not worked at least been used on you?
Performing marriages, funerals, baptisisms, last rites and absolving the sins for HoPers for-- not very long actually.
Carpal \'Tunnel
3,533 posts
Location: Hampshire College, MA, USA
try "so that you would have salt. if you dont want it i'll take it back, but you really do need saly, you know"
-James
"How do you know if you're happy or sad without a mask? Or angry? Or ready for dessert?"
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
bwahahahaha! Silly ickle slugs... dont half make a pong with salt tho... poor lil guys.. never again!
The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
oh man... my mum does that...
The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
noooooooo,,, thats just weird
Most of it lives in our Vdub bus... cos they are easier to use and pack
The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
just a tad
anywhoooo! Methinks we are slightly
but i dont know any chat up lines, because im that cool The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
"Does your head hurt?"
"No, why?"
"Because falling all the way down from heaven must have done some damage"
tacky ick.. so it is...
The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
man, i really dont know any chat up lines... thats pretty bad...
The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
well... i dunno... it can raise the odd giggle
The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
10,530 posts
Location: They seek him here, they seek him there...
ohhh. it changed like magic
The existance of flamethrowers says that someone, somewhere, at sometime said "I need to set that thing on fire, but it's too far away."
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