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Page: 123
Spanner
Spanner

remembers when it was all fields round here
Location: in the works... somewhere...
Member Since: 27th Feb 2003
Total posts: 2790
Posted:In conversation with some HoP members, they've told me that, before I mentioned something in conversation with them which made it obvious I was female, they thought I was male.

Having been a member on HoP for 2 years, this has been said far more than I originally expected it to, even from people who have been here around the same length of time as me. I uploaded a photograph which actually shows my face close up into my gallery for the first time yesterday (a bit late I know redface ) and more people have now admitted that they previously thought I was male.

And I don't mind at all. On the contrary - I find it funny biggrin - I'm just curious about how people have come to that conclusion.

Without a photograph or many references to one's gender, I think we do tend to have a vague picture of what someone looks like from how they write online. But what is it about that which makes us think of that person as one gender, when there should be just as much chance of them being the other? Do you tend to think of someone as your own gender, or the opoosite, without these clues?

Has it happened to you? Are you also a female who has been mistaken for a male? I think I've only ever heard of those instances, but there must be some males who have been mistaken for females online.

confused


"I thought you are man, but
you are nice woman.

yay,

:R"

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TheBovrilMonkey
TheBovrilMonkey

Liquid Cow
Location: High Wycombe, England
Member Since: 3rd Sep 2001
Total posts: 2629
Posted:I always used to think that Pyrowill was a girl.



I'm surprised that more people didn't work it out considering the name.

wink tongue



Actually, I was asked by hoppers a number of times while I was on holiday 'What did you think I'd look like before you met me', which I suppose is similar.

To be honest, I don't generally form an opinion of how a person looks, or their gender, from their posts. I think I'm probably in the minority in that respect.

EDITED_BY: TheBovrilMonkey (1109818249)


But there's no sense crying over every mistake. You just keep on trying till you run out of cake.

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PK_
PK_

Lambretta Fanatic

Member Since: 20th Dec 2001
Total posts: 4991
Posted:im a girl at heart wink

PK.

"To be an angel, one need not have wings.
In giving love there is an equal grace.
Nor need one seek the aura in the face,
As love unveils the beauty of all things."

*Francois Couperin.

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mtbeer
mtbeer

ARRRR!
Location: Charlotte, NC, USA
Member Since: 11th Aug 2004
Total posts: 529
Posted:It's because your avatar has no boobs! biggrin

"My skin is singed but it heals my heart and with glowing pride I'll wear my scars." -Davey Havok

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ImmortalAngel
Scientist!
Location: Waterloo, Ontario, Canada
Member Since: 19th Jan 2004
Total posts: 578
Posted:I've been confused for a girl a fair bit actually -.- I don't really mind much don't mind much at all though biggrin
I have also been confused for a girl in real life before as well, which was expected, because I was forced into dressing up in drag for a party...not that the dress stayed on long or anything, but I was mistaken for a girl, with incredibly haiyr legs ^.^'


Educate your self in the Hazards of Fire Breathing <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> STAY SAFE! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/hug.gif" alt="" />

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PyroMonkey
PyroMonkey

b...bal...lence?....
Location: Northern Beaches, Sydney
Member Since: 6th Jan 2005
Total posts: 370
Posted:oops i feel silly now, i though you were a girl immortalangel

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fNi
fNi

master of disaster
Location: New York
Member Since: 8th Mar 2004
Total posts: 3354
Posted:i've often been mistaken for a member of the fairer sex...only online tho

kyrian: I've felt your finger connect with me many times
lou kitten: sneaky little meatball..
ezz: please corrupt me more

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Ry
Ry

Gromit's Humble Squire
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Member Since: 2nd Feb 2005
Total posts: 4496
Posted:Been confused for a girl when I was a lot younger and had long hair. When I got worried I was getting too pretty, it went. And it's been downhill from there. ubblol j/k

Life's been good.

I think there usually tend to be clues about a person's gender (physical or mental, if one wants to differentiate) in the way they write, and in the way they choose to relate to or interact (e.g. lots of smileys? which smileys? Choice of words e.g. how often would you use 'lurvely' instead of 'great'). On top of that, there is the avatar which has to be deciphered in some way.

I think though, being a guy, I personally would feel 'safer' assuming someone was a guy by default. Finding out this wonderful person you've been chatting to is in actual fact a girl is a bit less awkward than finding out this 'girl' you've been talking to is a guy (not just for you, but for the other person too- "what if he was being nice to me just because he thought I was a girl?") And playing devil's advocate, isn't the Internet notorious for being infested with lonely yet hopeful Cinderellas (male or female). It'd be interesting to get a girl's perspective on the matter.

Anyway, all that having been said. These days I'm surprised that when you look at 'gender' on a form, you only have m/f. Academics differentiate as well between sex and gender (or physical gender and mental gender) and even then- what about if genderwise, you're physically or mentally ambiguous? Just food for thought.. smile Apologies for the fluffy rant cool


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ImmortalAngel
Scientist!
Location: Waterloo, Ontario, Canada
Member Since: 19th Jan 2004
Total posts: 578
Posted:Written by: PyroMonkey

oops i feel silly now, i though you were a girl immortalangel


ubblol
Point ubbloco
hug


Educate your self in the Hazards of Fire Breathing <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> STAY SAFE! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/hug.gif" alt="" />

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Hanz
Hanz

veteran
Location: Bendigo, Vic, Australia
Member Since: 7th Jun 2004
Total posts: 1328
Posted:sometimes I think it is because of online names we have chosen... sometimes it is the way we speak and what our interests are... but really, I dont know why people get confused.

I am always being mistaken for a guy online... because my nick name is so much like the german name Hans... but with a z, not an s.
Doesnt help that the stuff I am into is stuff that isnt considered "girly"

I have also been mistaken for a guy offline...
But I was walking along and there were all these people behind me and I could hear them asking who the guy in front was, there was no one else around at that stage, so I spun around and they were shocked that it was me... I have no idea why they thought I was a guy... but it was kinda worrying, lol


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Sir_Sheep
Sir_Sheep

old hand
Location: Chester, UK
Member Since: 1st Mar 2003
Total posts: 725
Posted:My name does manage to confuse a lot of people.

Spoiling Christmas for small children since 2003.

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polythene
veteran
Location: London/ Surrey
Member Since: 15th May 2003
Total posts: 1359
Posted:Hehe, I was always guessed to be a bloke before I added the bouncing avatar (Can't really count Flid's guess though, he gets everyone's gender wrong! biggrin)

The optimist claims that we are living in the best of all possible worlds.
The pessimist fears this is true.

Always make time to play in the snow.

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=Flashpoint=
=Flashpoint=

Pasta of Muppets
Location: in the interwebs...
Member Since: 1st Sep 2004
Total posts: 2719
Posted:I think its just as Hanz says - and the initial reaction to stereotypes...

I mean, honestly, how many girls do you know who would call themselves Spanner? How many boys do you know who would call themselves ImmortalAngel?

Spanner = mechanic = masculine
Angel (even though theyre asexual) = feminine

Any other names you thought were of the opposite gender?

And avatars: IA, its a kitten fer gods sake!!!
biggrin


ohmygodlaserbeamspewpewpew!
ubbrollsmileubbrollsmileubbrollsmileubbrollsmile

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elasta
elasta

addict
Location: wishing to be in Rio
Member Since: 28th Nov 2002
Total posts: 645
Posted:yeah, I thought bird was female til I met him!

there's nothing quite as fulfilling as a tasty airwrap

if you're full of sh!t, at least you're fertile

"we are all flowers growing in God's garden... and that is why he spreads the sh!t around" - David Byrne

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Pink...?
Pink...?

Mistress of Pink...Multicoloured
Location: Over There
Member Since: 6th Apr 2002
Total posts: 6140
Posted:I thought Sir Sheep was male till i met her.
But her name is very confusing.

No one tends to get my gender confused...i wonder why ubbangel

I have been confused by other peoples, but i can't think of any examples at the moment...


Never pick up a duck in a dungeon...

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Seraphire
Seraphire

HoP's Original Smelly-Hippie-Scum-Bag
Location: Under your stairs
Member Since: 12th May 2004
Total posts: 270
Posted:It's a bit off topic but I get called a "lady" at work by loads of customers. They get a shock when I talk to them. I smile when its little kids becuase they've related long hair to femininity, but when 40 somethings do it, it gets irritating. I've thought about growing a beard, but I don't know if I want to put myself through that. frown I need a hug.

Music gives Soul to the Universe, Wings to the Mind, Flight to the Imagination and Life to Everything.

Educate yourself in the Hazards of Fire Breathing STAY SAFE! hug

dsei.org Stop The Arms Trade!

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coleman
coleman

big and good and broken
Location: lunn dunn, yoo kay
Member Since: 29th Aug 2002
Total posts: 7330
Posted:i got around this problem by choosing a username that is simply my forename with 'man' tagged on the end.

i recommend this technique for all hop users wink


cole.
/who does have a good reason for the extension really\


"i see you at 'dis cafe.
i come to 'dis cafe quite a lot myself.
they do porridge."
- tim westwood

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Mand
Mand

Keeper of the Spitfire
Location: Calgary Canada
Member Since: 24th Oct 2003
Total posts: 2317
Posted:ImmortalAngel- it was only recently that I found out you were male. rolleyes
I think it's the hair on your avatar- kinda makes me think 60s female hair. shrug

Hanz and Sir Sheep- your both female??? Well holy censored
I'd never have guessed. ubblol

My gender tends not to get mistaken too much online.
However, in real life... when I'm in Texas I quite often get mistaken for a guy. mad
(I don't know how. I wear fairly tight tshirts, and unless I'm mistaken a guy with huge manboobs I'm quite obviously female! tongue )


Lets steal a spaceship and head for the sun, and shoot the stars with a lemonade ray gun.

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nucleon
nucleon

newbie
Location: Eindhoven, the Netherlands
Member Since: 29th Oct 2004
Total posts: 404
Posted:I always thought I was a girl until...
no thats not true,

but seriously, it indeed suprises me how often I am wrong.
I think that for the sake of clear communication, pink and sweet avatars should be for the girls as well as names containing angel, fairy and/or other sweet girly things.


so you think Im not a newbie? Ok I'll be the King of the newbies. Nucleon the king of all noobs

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Glåss
Glåss

The Ministry of Manipulation
Location: Bristol
Member Since: 8th Nov 2001
Total posts: 2523
Posted:whats wrong with a kitten for an avatar smile

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ImmortalAngel
Scientist!
Location: Waterloo, Ontario, Canada
Member Since: 19th Jan 2004
Total posts: 578
Posted:I agree with Glass biggrin
Kittens are very cool and very manly avatars! I would have a dog avatar, but dogs are to big to put lime helmets on...
And as for the name...Angels are like, the most kick ass things in the universe! Look at Michael the ArchAngel...or Lucifer the fallen angel? How much more manly go they get?
Plus, all angels are 'male', just without the reproductive stuff.
http://www.steliart.com/angelology_archangels_archeiai.html
br>Check that site our for some basic (and some more advanced) angel info, as well as it's sources.

Anyways, I think Angel is a genderless kind of thing unless it's something like "Sweetie_angel_99" or "Angel_pie_72" or something like that...


Educate your self in the Hazards of Fire Breathing <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> STAY SAFE! <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/hug.gif" alt="" />

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Spontaneously Combustable
Spontaneously Combustable

The cuter FRD
Location: London, Brixton
Member Since: 19th Jun 2004
Total posts: 214
Posted:Ppl cant really judge my gender with this name, it dosnt confuse people or spark curiosiy..... i think


----There are no opportunities, only problems----

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nucleon
nucleon

newbie
Location: Eindhoven, the Netherlands
Member Since: 29th Oct 2004
Total posts: 404
Posted:Written by: Glss

whats wrong with a kitten for an avatar smile



well, there is nothing wrong with it, but is you want that people immediatly see thet you are a bloke it does stand a bit in the way. anyway, it doesnt matter me if you someone is mistaken easely as long as you don't lie when asked about yourself.


so you think Im not a newbie? Ok I'll be the King of the newbies. Nucleon the king of all noobs

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mech
mech

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: "In your ear"
Member Since: 9th Jun 2003
Total posts: 6207
Posted:i was gutted for the first falmouth meet up last year, when ithought loads of ladies where going, then they all turned out to be male!

so i have done it, hence why i usded teh gif of me as a bloke for ages! smile


Step (el-nombrie)

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Spanner
Spanner

remembers when it was all fields round here
Location: in the works... somewhere...
Member Since: 27th Feb 2003
Total posts: 2790
Posted:Written by: coleman

i got around this problem by choosing a username that is simply my forename with 'man' tagged on the end.




Spannerwoman returns biggrin

Interesting stuff here.

Written by: nucleon
I think that for the sake of clear communication, pink and sweet avatars should be for the girls as well as names containing angel, fairy and/or other sweet girly things.



I disagree tongue While I didn't choose Spanner in order to appear masculine (it was actually my nickname at school) I did consciously choose it to avoid having things like "angel", "fairy" and the like in my name. No offence to anyone who includes these in their name, but I wanted something different smile

Offline, I've only ever once been mistaken for a man, at a time when my hair was at it's longest, I was at my chubbiest and wearing too much black. I must admit that, back then, I probably could have passed for a Motrhead roadie ubblol


"I thought you are man, but
you are nice woman.

yay,

:R"

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fluffy napalm fairy
fluffy napalm fairy

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Brum / Dorset / Fairy Land
Member Since: 12th Dec 2001
Total posts: 3638
Posted:Ry' - thought your were a lady
Spanner - knew you were a lady!

I've got confused with loads.....

Seraphire - man? *hug*
Cantus thought BamBam was a boy (I think!) lol! biggrin
Narr - thought you were boy-shaped!
Hanz? LADY! eep! *hides*

too many to remember now methinks.

Oh! I thought Kyrian was a bloke for ages!
And Kurobei was a girl (met him now so tis all good!)
And Nx? - sorry mate I thought your were gonna be a girlie too!


Geologists do it in the dirt................ spank

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fluffy napalm fairy
fluffy napalm fairy

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Brum / Dorset / Fairy Land
Member Since: 12th Dec 2001
Total posts: 3638
Posted:oh my! ubbangel I'm one confused fairy!

lol - when I used to post as Helium Dreamer someone told me to make sure I pulled my........erm (remembers there are little people reading).......'man bits'.........out of the way when learning to Unicycle!

ubblol

I giggled for days!


Geologists do it in the dirt................ spank

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Stormy, Queen of Vodka
Stormy, Queen of Vodka

The HoP Industrial Rainbow Fairy
Location: Near Portsmouth, UK
Member Since: 26th Jun 2004
Total posts: 385
Posted:I don't really get mistaken for anything but female. My icon, plus what I type is apparently feminine. I don't get mistaken for a bloke in real life either. It has something to do with the tapered waist, large breasts and huge bum hehe biggrin

.You've got invisible fangs and cherry nun bangs,
Your erotic cabaret is non stop
You're wearing too many belts
And I bet they leave welts
Shut up and dance cause I wanna pop.

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Pigeon_Wigeon
Pigeon_Wigeon

Say what?
Location: Surrey/Portsmouth
Member Since: 24th Dec 2004
Total posts: 4760
Posted:Well I'm guessing people know I'm a girl... If not then hey I'm a girl!! PIgeon_wigeon is kinda... neutral I suppose.. Ahwell and yeah lots of surprises in here.. spanner got to say... thought you were a bloke... in defence I used to have a friend called Spanner who was.. a bloke... but yeh

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Hanz
Hanz

veteran
Location: Bendigo, Vic, Australia
Member Since: 7th Jun 2004
Total posts: 1328
Posted:Written by: fluffy napalm fairy

Hanz? LADY! eep! *hides*



why do you say it that way??? *is interested*


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Adya Miriyana
Adya Miriyana

*slou?
Location: Adelaide
Member Since: 4th Feb 2005
Total posts: 6554
Posted:Hoping you know i'm female tongue

oh i think sakura thought i was male, hehe np


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Page: 123

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