Forums > Social Chat > Random Confession Thread
Login/Join to ParticipateSporadically Prodigal
2,758 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Saw this sorta thing on another site recently (Bender will find this very familiar) and thought, in conjunction with the new Official Rumour Thread, it might be amusing.
The Deal: Confess something random.. Has to be true though!
I'll start: When I was in 4th Grade, I told a few of my classmates that I was a vampire. I had obviously developed a case of Corey Haim infatuation thanks to The Lost Boys film, and developed a large and complex story about my abduction, biting, transformation and reassimilation into school life as a vampire. Fortunately, I wasn't 100% vamp yet, but was eagerly seeking my first feed. I think I actually acted slightly bezerk a couple of times; to enhance the hunger driven madness and my inhumane cravings for blood.
I think this went on for a few weeks until eventually my parents were called into the school to have a mystery meeting with my teacher. Apparently I had scared the crap outta some of the girls I told and they had been getting bad nightmares and told their parents. So I was asked to stop and "an eye kept on me" to ensure I wasn't an 8 year old psychopath or something!
anyone else got a confession?
Please, tell Mother Confessor.
HoP Posting Guidelines
Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?
If you can answer YES to these 4 questions then you may post a reply.
Mumma Hen
6,391 posts
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Confessions huh?...welllll.....
When I was about 7 I told my little brother (who was five at the time) that men with siccors lived in his room and waited for the night time to jump on his shoulders (from on top of the bunk beds) and cut his nose off!!!
He fully shit himself... He used to run into his bed covering his nose..poor lil dude...Man o man I used to be a cow.... But Im a good girl now.... full of Lurve
TAJ "boat mummy." VALURA "yes sweetie you went on a boat, was daddy there with you?" TAJ "no, but monkey on boat" VALURA "well then sweetie, Daddy WAS there with you"
2,737 posts
Location: London
Oh no...not going here.......
Not yet anyway -
Small Lardy Person In Disguise
Mistress of Pink...Multicoloured
6,140 posts
Location: Over There, United Kingdom
I have an older sister, when i was little she brought home her boyfriends.
She'd tell me there name, but i would go up to them when she was out the room and ask them if they were Simon, Chris, Dave...and say all the boy's names i knew except there name.
When my sister walked back into the room her BF would be suspicious and start accusing her of cheating!
I used to be really evil...wait i still am
Never pick up a duck in a dungeon...
557 posts
Location: The Underworld
My friends and I once convinced this idiot girl at school that we were part of a lesbian sex cult and wanted her to join us. We kept stroking eachothers hands on the desks in class while giving her alluring looks. She got really freaked and began to avoid us like the plague!
Instalment 1.....
Az abouve, So below...
4,308 posts
Location: York, England
I'm trying to think of something taht's funny without being horrible.
Ok, got it.
When i was probably 13 or 14 i was at a horse show and my friend and i were sitting on the bleachers waiting for our classes (we had hours). She was saying she was fat (she wasn't skinny, but not fat) and i go "no, ur not fat. let's see....." *I looked around our view of the show grounds to see if i coudl see anyone. And i did... only one but she was really really fat* "she's fat!" *I point*
It was her mother.
Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive
Shalom VeAhavah
New Hampshire has a point....
4,308 posts
Location: York, England
Oh and there's always the great time i was on a bus coming back from a sporting event and as we pull into the parking lot asomeone goes "your sister is really hot." me: "that's my mother" teenage boy: "ur joking right?" me: "no" *teenage boy runs off in shame*
not a confession per se but a funny story anyhow.
Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive
Shalom VeAhavah
New Hampshire has a point....
Mumma Hen
6,391 posts
Location: Brisbane, Australia
LOL at Kyri ...Your mums a Yummy Mummy...kinda like 'Stiflers MOM'
TAJ "boat mummy." VALURA "yes sweetie you went on a boat, was daddy there with you?" TAJ "no, but monkey on boat" VALURA "well then sweetie, Daddy WAS there with you"
3 posts
Location: Phoenix, AZ
I once got busy in a burger king bathroom....
729 posts
Location: OK, USA
Good one here -
My little sister (junior high age) was being a royal pain to me, fighting, screaming, throwing a tantrum and physically attacking me this one day, and then DEMANDED that I assist her on a school project over Canada. She couldn't draw the Maple Leaf on the nation's flag and expected me to do it, even got parents involved in the issue ("you've got artistic talent, help her out" - translation "just do it to shut her up").
Naturally, in my pissed off state, I drew something from a different plant, also found in the "M" encyclopedia, that some of us may recognize
The only reason she wasn't suspended was cuz the teacher knew me from when I was her age
What hits the fan is not evenly distributed.
729 posts
Location: OK, USA
Oh yeah I also convinced her that she was the mailman's illegitimate kid for like 2 weeks...
What hits the fan is not evenly distributed.
184 posts
Location: Stroudsburg, PA, USA
when I was like 14 my friend got 3rd degree burns on his face, from a roman candle hand crafted by yours truely.
I smell something burning.
Mumma Hen
6,391 posts
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Undie monster Malcolm..!!! How shameful that it made the paper!!!
Dont worry, your secret is safe with us...for now!!
ROTFPMSL
TAJ "boat mummy." VALURA "yes sweetie you went on a boat, was daddy there with you?" TAJ "no, but monkey on boat" VALURA "well then sweetie, Daddy WAS there with you"
Intrepid Penguin
5,635 posts
Location: Australia
hehehe be glad you didnt notice them hanging out whilst everyone was still around.... My uncle did that ! HA! boy, now that was funny..... `
When we were little we used to steal cookies from the cupboard and blame them on my brother! heehe poor sparx! And we'd eat suger samwhiches and then tell mum that Sparx had spilt the suger and thats why there wasnt any left....
and one time, Sparx and i convinced my sister that i was beating Sparx up, we locked ourselves in my pare's bedroom, and i slapped the wall, and he screamed and cried. My sister locked herself in the bathroom cos she was so scared of me, and kept screaming at me to let him go... HEHEHE poor kid...
and last but not least. I used to eat soap it wasnt bad either...
Currently on the right side up of the world.
100 characters max...
2,996 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
I used to eat sand at the beach. It wasn't my fault!!! My parents didn't give me a bucket & spade, they gave me a bowl & a spoon instead!!!
[ 06 September 2002, 15:07: Message edited by: Rozi ]
It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.
What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...
addict
669 posts
Location: Lancashire, UK
I once convinced an ex that Japanese people's bellybuttons are alike their eyes, kinda slanted compared with Westerner's eyes (PC). This lasted for all of 5mins when I burst out laughing that she'd fallen for it.
4,308 posts
Location: York, England
I let my crew members drink beer in the cat walks. good leader eh?
Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive
Shalom VeAhavah
New Hampshire has a point....
107 posts
Location: Michigan, USA
My confession would be me and my friend from Chicago(age 12) convienced everyone in her town I was Simon LeBons( from Duran Duran) cousin Niki visitng from England...I still dunno why, but hey the believed us....
And all my days are trances And all my nightly dreamsAre where thy gray eye glances And where thy footstep gleams-In what ethereal dances By what eternal streams. Edgar Allan PoeThe prophet is a fool and the religious man is fucking mad, and for the multitude of your sense and your inequity, and the great hatred......NANCY BOY
92 posts
Location: Nowhere,Anywere/the middle of somewhere
Hey flash fire, can i call you Mother confessor?
Anywhoo, i really hated my teacher and so i put liquid super glue on the both of the toilet seats and low-an-behold i caught me a teacher.
*breakes into a hill-billy dance around the room*
__________________________________
Have no fear, I is here.
member
577 posts
Location: Berlin, Germany
LOL at all thsee stories.
Being that I'm a perfect angel I'm sure I don't have anything to confess, except:
When I was 16, I once convinced thise guy who was head of the Christian club at his school that I used to be a guy and still had a dick. He wouldn't come near me the whole night.
When I was 18, I got drunk with my 25 year old ex-convict boyfriend and made him dress up in my underwear and sing "Sweet Transvestite" from the Rocky Horror Picture Show to me and my friend. My whole apartment building could hear it (and us cracking up).
The guy I lost my virginity to was such a dork, that when he and I first had sex and he told hiw older brother that he had finally gotten laid, his brother laughed at him and told him he was lying.
And maybe there's a few other things I'll wind up mentioning later. Always remember - you can't be embarassed if you have no shame.
Beauty is the conscious sum of all our perversions.-Salvador DaliHope without action is hopeless.
Sporadically Prodigal
2,758 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Mother Confessor is actually a term I pinched from a series of books by Terry Goodkind called The Sword of Truth series.
But, call me whatever you want dude!
Random confession #2: My mother caught me eating a snail when I was little. She opened my mouth to find it full of a gooey black mess with occasional crunchy bits. YUCK!
HoP Posting Guidelines
Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?
If you can answer YES to these 4 questions then you may post a reply.
100 characters max...
2,996 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
At least snails are crunchy, and they taste great cooked in garlic butter
I convinced a good friend of my sister's that I invented concorde. I told her that I had been working on the plans in class, and they were coonfiscated by the teacher. Apparently the teacher sold the plans for a lot of money
warning, this next section contains adult content
A guy I used to go out with really used to bug me by sharing some very confronting sexual fantasies with me. He was an ultra blokey macho type. So one day when we were driving along in the car I asked him whether he had ever considered being anally penetrated. He almost drove off the road...
[ 06 September 2002, 16:42: Message edited by: Rozi ]
It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.
What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...
466 posts
Location: Ft worth Texas
I told my little sister (ten years younger)that she was adopted.
when I was 14 or 15 I was into the whole grunge thing,my dad beeing ever worrysome thought I was depressed so he sent me to a psycologist,to get back at him i told the doctor that I heard voices soetimes and they told me to burn things,I went on to totally horrify this poor lady with tales of thoughts that a coroner would get green from.
she would not see me again,she referred me to another psycologist.
There are no obstacles only challenges.
Very funny scotty now beam down my pants.
[colour."green"}What would willie do?
AHH theres too many wee leprechauns i cannae squash them all
340 posts
Location: Australia
hmmmm where to start, I had sex on the doorstep of the head office of my high school at one in the morning and was caught by the cops! Can anyone beat that?
HOW TO FLY 101:
step 1. Throw your self at the ground.
step 2. Miss.
Sporadically Prodigal
2,758 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Burning Byron - that's fantastic!!
Not that I want this to turn into a sexual thread, but my boy and I did it on my cousin's trampoline recently!! Was laughing too much to really take advantage of the bounce factor though.
HoP Posting Guidelines
Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?
If you can answer YES to these 4 questions then you may post a reply.
Pooh-Bah
2,211 posts
Location: London, Wales (UK)
I told two American Marines that there were Leperchauns in Ireland, and people regarded them as useful as possums. They were very disappointed to hear that the 'little people' did not really have pots of gold!
I also convinced a drunk Irish man that I was Japanese!
On a more shameful note, I read my sisters diary when I was little! She has since forgiven me though!
[ 06 September 2002, 20:06: Message edited by: Kat ]
Come faeries, take me out of this dull world, for I would ride with you upon the wind and dance upon the mountains like a flame.
- W B Yeats
459 posts
Location: Richmond, Virginia
Wow, I'm practically angelic compared to the rest of yous. Worst thing we used to do as teenagers was steal 'Neighborhood Watch' signs, just to prove a point...
Then there was the time that a bunch of friends and I were supposed to meet at a certain bar, but as it happened, my carload didn't know where the place was and were accidentally abandoned. So the next morning we told the rest of the group how we met up with some supermodels who took us for a ride in their limo to karaoke, then to an exclusive party at the local casino. We then moved up to the penthouse for a more 'intimate' gathering of friends, and how they dropped us off reluctantly the next morning...One of them believed that for nearly 3 months
Dance like it hurts; Love like you need money; Work like someone is watching.
Never criticize someone until you've walked a mile in their shoes. That way, when you DO criticize them, you are a mile away, and you have their shoes.
4,308 posts
Location: York, England
Oringinally posted by Kali:
quote:I am friends with a few guys that no one ever belives them when they say they get laid. Including me. We did verify one of the stories two years later tho
The guy I lost my virginity to was such a dork, that when he and I first had sex and he told hiw older brother that he had finally gotten laid, his brother laughed at him and told him he was lying.
Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive
Shalom VeAhavah
New Hampshire has a point....
92 posts
Location: San Francisco Bay Area
I was the guy on the grassy knoll.
Is that all life comes down to? To be lying face down with an overenthusiastic guy in pink pin-striped pants sitting on top of you and grunting? -- Random MusingsSex, Drugs and Psytrance.
557 posts
Location: The Underworld
Byron, don't tells no-ones, but I knows for a fact that a certain small HOPer can beat that... more than once over I'm sure.....
Az abouve, So below...
786 posts
Location: The Phire Kru
So who's that then DFQ???
whats up with all the limitations?
Similar Topics
Using the keywords [random confession] we found the following existing topics.
- Forums > Random Confession Thread [41 replies]
Show more..
© 1998 - 2024 Home of Poi
All prices converted to United States dollars using XE.com