Forums > Social Chat > Past Creeps Up
Login/Join to ParticipateBRONZE Member
the henna lady
6,193 posts
Location: WNY, USA
the henna lady
6,193 posts
Location: WNY, USA
Posted:
As alot of you know I took up sword swallowing and was making good progress. The end of last week I went to try to swallow more than a foot. My gag reflex kicked into high gear. This isn't the bad part (and yes I am whining...deal!
You guys are the only ones who won't say "I told you so" to me!) Before I get to the bad part I need to give a brief history lesson in Pele's world. In my teenage years not terribly long ago I cared entirely too much what people thought and so was bulemic (where you eat alot and then puke to lose weight). It started with me gagging myself, then I used ipcec syrup and then whenever I had food I automatically threw up. I went through treatment and have been doing alright for years.It seems that the reactivating of my gag reflex has my body remembering all that and now I can't hold food down again. I called the doctor this morning and he said to stop what I was attempting to do that triggered the conditioned reflex and allow my body to reset itself. Until then I am stuck with small amounts of vitamin shakes (yuck!).I am soooooooooooo disappointed as I was really excited about this. At any rate, I think we have some photo's of me swallowing the small sword that I can send in when I get them back from the printer. I know it isn't worth my health but it is still something I want to try to beat, now more than ever since it has become very personal, ya know? If I can swallow the sword fully and beat the bulemic impulses then I have "won the war" so to speak.At any rate..moral of the story kiddies....don't care too much what other people think or else it'll come back to bite you in the ass!------------------Pele Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir...[This message has been edited by Pele (edited 13 March 2001).]
As alot of you know I took up sword swallowing and was making good progress. The end of last week I went to try to swallow more than a foot. My gag reflex kicked into high gear. This isn't the bad part (and yes I am whining...deal!
You guys are the only ones who won't say "I told you so" to me!) Before I get to the bad part I need to give a brief history lesson in Pele's world. In my teenage years not terribly long ago I cared entirely too much what people thought and so was bulemic (where you eat alot and then puke to lose weight). It started with me gagging myself, then I used ipcec syrup and then whenever I had food I automatically threw up. I went through treatment and have been doing alright for years.It seems that the reactivating of my gag reflex has my body remembering all that and now I can't hold food down again. I called the doctor this morning and he said to stop what I was attempting to do that triggered the conditioned reflex and allow my body to reset itself. Until then I am stuck with small amounts of vitamin shakes (yuck!).I am soooooooooooo disappointed as I was really excited about this. At any rate, I think we have some photo's of me swallowing the small sword that I can send in when I get them back from the printer. I know it isn't worth my health but it is still something I want to try to beat, now more than ever since it has become very personal, ya know? If I can swallow the sword fully and beat the bulemic impulses then I have "won the war" so to speak.At any rate..moral of the story kiddies....don't care too much what other people think or else it'll come back to bite you in the ass!------------------Pele Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir...[This message has been edited by Pele (edited 13 March 2001).]Pele
Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir
"Oooh look! A pub!" -exclaimed after recovering from a stupid fall
"And for the decadence of art, nothing beats a roaring fire." -TMK
poo-bah
1,015 posts
Location: Austin TX USA
1,015 posts
Location: Austin TX USA
Posted:
Well, Pele, you're a tough broad. Tough enough to bare this difficult aspect of your past in public, tough enough to twirl fire, tough enough to try sword-swallowing. You'll get there. You'll beat it.
Well, Pele, you're a tough broad. Tough enough to bare this difficult aspect of your past in public, tough enough to twirl fire, tough enough to try sword-swallowing. You'll get there. You'll beat it.
Laugh while you can, monkey-boy
GOLD Member
member
148 posts
Location: Baltimore, MD USA
member
148 posts
Location: Baltimore, MD USA
Posted:
Hey Pele my best friend in middle school was anorexic & damn that's a tough tough road. Cheers to you for having the courage & wherewithall to beat it in the first place!!Get yourself healthy ..make sure you can keep your food down & when your body remembers how to behave itself try again. No hurry..the swords aren't going anywhere and we'll be here to cheer you on when you get it!!Keep us posted; I'm sure we all anxiously await the victorious news!
Hey Pele my best friend in middle school was anorexic & damn that's a tough tough road. Cheers to you for having the courage & wherewithall to beat it in the first place!!Get yourself healthy ..make sure you can keep your food down & when your body remembers how to behave itself try again. No hurry..the swords aren't going anywhere and we'll be here to cheer you on when you get it!!Keep us posted; I'm sure we all anxiously await the victorious news!
BRONZE Member
enthusiast
384 posts
Location: London, UK
enthusiast
384 posts
Location: London, UK
Posted:
...i told you so! heheheoh well the Pele i know can win any war - and i am sure she'll win this one too...don't be disappointed though and remember:losing one battle doesn't mean that you've lost the war...it means that you have to send your soldiers on holidays, to chill out somewhere nice and sunny for a while and get a nice tan and then when they've had a nice break get them together again to the battlefield for the next battle...WHAT ON EARTH I AM GOING ON ABOUT??? 
it must be the lack of sleep or something....anyways you know what i am saying sweety 
- i am sure you'll win this one too... happy swinging,Simos
...i told you so! hehehe
oh well the Pele i know can win any war - and i am sure she'll win this one too...don't be disappointed though and remember:losing one battle doesn't mean that you've lost the war...it means that you have to send your soldiers on holidays, to chill out somewhere nice and sunny for a while and get a nice tan and then when they've had a nice break get them together again to the battlefield for the next battle...WHAT ON EARTH I AM GOING ON ABOUT??? it must be the lack of sleep or something....anyways you know what i am saying sweety - i am sure you'll win this one too... happy swinging,Simos AnonymousPLATINUM Member
Posted:
Hey, sis, I have to say I'm so excited for you. I know that may sound like a strange response, but I can't help but read your post and think that you've been offered an awesome opportunity here. You've got the chance to solidify your healing on this in a very serious way. I'm glad you're hooked up with your doctor on this. Definitely keep with her/his guidance. But don't give up on the sword swallowing. I have faith you will prevail. Diana
Hey, sis, I have to say I'm so excited for you. I know that may sound like a strange response, but I can't help but read your post and think that you've been offered an awesome opportunity here. You've got the chance to solidify your healing on this in a very serious way. I'm glad you're hooked up with your doctor on this. Definitely keep with her/his guidance. But don't give up on the sword swallowing. I have faith you will prevail. Diana
BRONZE Member
Pooh-Bah
2,211 posts
Location: London, Wales (UK)
Pooh-Bah
2,211 posts
Location: London, Wales (UK)
Posted:
Wise words Pele.I also have known people that have had bulemia and anorexia,except they haven't been able to kick the problem by attacking the root of the problem, basically low self-esteem. You are a brave lady and I'm sure once your body adjusts you will be away again! Best of luck.Kat ------------------"London is a city coming down from its trip and there's going to be a lot of refugees" - Danny,Withnail & I
Wise words Pele.I also have known people that have had bulemia and anorexia,except they haven't been able to kick the problem by attacking the root of the problem, basically low self-esteem. You are a brave lady and I'm sure once your body adjusts you will be away again! Best of luck.Kat ------------------"London is a city coming down from its trip and there's going to be a lot of refugees" - Danny,Withnail & I
Come faeries, take me out of this dull world, for I would ride with you upon the wind and dance upon the mountains like a flame.
- W B Yeats
member
383 posts
Location: Brisbane, Qld, Australia
383 posts
Location: Brisbane, Qld, Australia
Posted:
pele,that must be so annoying, having that memory have to come back from the past after it had already been dealt with! i had anorexia 6 years ago for 2 years, (in between bouts of bulimia too). and it was the hardest thing i've ever had to do so far in my life - beating it that is. and then training your mind and body to act a 'normal' way again. it took me a few years to get back there. so i say u use the situation to pat yourself on the back for getting rid of it the first time and while i personally probably wouldn't keep trying to swallow super long swords if your still drawn to it and need to do it then i know you'll get it =)
pele,that must be so annoying, having that memory have to come back from the past after it had already been dealt with! i had anorexia 6 years ago for 2 years, (in between bouts of bulimia too). and it was the hardest thing i've ever had to do so far in my life - beating it that is. and then training your mind and body to act a 'normal' way again. it took me a few years to get back there. so i say u use the situation to pat yourself on the back for getting rid of it the first time and while i personally probably wouldn't keep trying to swallow super long swords if your still drawn to it and need to do it then i know you'll get it =)
The beautiful thing about learning is that no one can take it away from you.- B.B.King
BRONZE Member
member
107 posts
Location: east randolph, VT USA
member
107 posts
Location: east randolph, VT USA
Posted:
go, pele, go!!
go, pele, go!!
BRONZE Member
member
134 posts
Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
member
134 posts
Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Posted:
Nothing but love and respect for you, Pele.We know you can do it. If you were strong enough to beat it the first time, you can definitely get through this new battle.This might be the universe giving you the opportunity to reexamine and revisit some of the old issues, and make certain your body, mind, and spirit are united and solid.good luck.-Rick
Nothing but love and respect for you, Pele.We know you can do it. If you were strong enough to beat it the first time, you can definitely get through this new battle.This might be the universe giving you the opportunity to reexamine and revisit some of the old issues, and make certain your body, mind, and spirit are united and solid.good luck.-Rick
-Rick aka Loki
oh, man, a signature?... uuh... this is like coming across wet cement... uuh, shoot, I had something clever I was saving... I hope I don't run out of sp
member
52 posts
Location: Johannesburg, South Africa
52 posts
Location: Johannesburg, South Africa
Posted:
I think it would be arrogant and naive of me to say that I could imagine what it's like ... I have no idea ...Tho' we don't really know you and although we'll probably never meet ... we feel *close* to you. Close because of what we share - Keep strong, Pele ... rise from the ashes ...LaterLutzki(Bish)
I think it would be arrogant and naive of me to say that I could imagine what it's like ... I have no idea ...Tho' we don't really know you and although we'll probably never meet ... we feel *close* to you. Close because of what we share - Keep strong, Pele ... rise from the ashes ...LaterLutzki(Bish)
Hasst du etwas zeit fuer mich?... Dan singe ich ein lied fuer dich ... -Bjork/Nena
member
78 posts
Location: london, england
78 posts
Location: london, england
Posted:
you could see it as an obstacle now but you'll prolly just find a stepping stone when you climb up it. best wishes and keep us postedo-o
you could see it as an obstacle now but you'll prolly just find a stepping stone when you climb up it. best wishes and keep us postedo-o
BRONZE Member
the henna lady
6,193 posts
Location: WNY, USA
the henna lady
6,193 posts
Location: WNY, USA
Posted:
In talking with the Doctor and other sword swallowers I know I am putting it on hold for now but I ***will*** return to it eventually, that I promise. Right now I need to get my body back to healthy and then beat it from there. Thank you all for your words of support, wisdom and insight. It has been touching and wonderful and I absolutely love this "family"!You all rock!My best and most heartfelt thanks to all!------------------Pele Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir..."I prefer not to go where there is a path but to blaze a new one!"
In talking with the Doctor and other sword swallowers I know I am putting it on hold for now but I ***will*** return to it eventually, that I promise. Right now I need to get my body back to healthy and then beat it from there. Thank you all for your words of support, wisdom and insight. It has been touching and wonderful and I absolutely love this "family"!You all rock!My best and most heartfelt thanks to all!------------------Pele Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir..."I prefer not to go where there is a path but to blaze a new one!"
Pele
Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir
"Oooh look! A pub!" -exclaimed after recovering from a stupid fall
"And for the decadence of art, nothing beats a roaring fire." -TMK
member
341 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
341 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Posted:
You are so wise Pele. Your passion for life and the challenges it throws at you is inspirational.Good luck.
You are so wise Pele. Your passion for life and the challenges it throws at you is inspirational.Good luck.
© 1998 - 2024 Home of Poi
All prices converted to United States dollars using XE.com