Forums > Social Chat > I just need to get something out. Sorry guys

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roarfire
roarfire

comfortably numb
Location: The countryside
Member Since: 8th Jul 2004
Total posts: 2676
Posted:His show was great, except I had to keep leaving and coming back. He was just performing his act as I walked in, and he was going around to the audience singing to them and including them into his routine. I always wished he'd come to me, but he never did.

After the show I was sitting on the ground smoking and he saw me quickly, but he ignored me because he was too busy being congratulated by people on the show, I smiled.

Then he smiled back, and everything seemed to go black....

I felt so stupid but I felt it had to be said:

Why do you think I stuck around after the show for this long? In hope that you would see me and offer me a ride home so I could spend more time with you

As he stopped to get petrol, I lay down in the back seat, I don't know why I sat in the back seat, he was my chauffeur I guess! When he returned he saw me lying on my back and half asleep.

And why do you think I went the longest route home? And why am I stopping for petrol right now? To spend more time with you, of course!

He then proceeded to comment on what an inviting position I was in.

Dont give me that charismatic talk now!"

We both laughed

You were fantastic in the show you know
Heh...Thanks. Yeah, it was lots of fun

He paused for ages then he turned and looked back to me sitting in the back seat.

FINE! he growled sarcastically. Well be together, if you so insist and he grinned ferociously, but I could see the gleam in his eye.

I was silent, and I nearly burst into tears, because I was so overwhelmed. I blinked and said nothing

Then I smiled at him, and he smiled back.

We never touched though, not a hug, nor an arm or kiss.

It ended at 5.28am, as I saw the red digital writing on my clock, and I felt the light creeping into my room and heard the distant sparrows chirping.

I never had a chance with him anyway



Sometimes I get sick of sleeping, because when I sleep, I have dreams and my dreams always cause me to be upset because the reality is opposite to what happens in the dream. When I wake up after them Im either in tears or I cant get back to sleep because I spend all night thinking about it and trying to make sense of it all. How stupid does all this sound? Whiney and teeny methinks. I cant help it! Im never like this. I hate waking up and getting hit by the brick of reality. Its all just false hope, wishful thinking. I dont like wishful thinking, I dont like dreams.

Does anyone else feel this way about dreams?!


.All things are beautiful if we take the time to look.

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mtbeer
mtbeer

ARRRR!
Location: Charlotte, NC, USA
Member Since: 11th Aug 2004
Total posts: 529
Posted:Wow, I want to be that guy but warmer.

"Dreams are illustrations... from the book your soul is writing about you." -Marsha Norman


"My skin is singed but it heals my heart and with glowing pride I'll wear my scars." -Davey Havok

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roarfire
roarfire

comfortably numb
Location: The countryside
Member Since: 8th Jul 2004
Total posts: 2676
Posted:You want to be that guy but warmer? I don't get it.

That quote is really nice, it's now my MSN name. Heh


.All things are beautiful if we take the time to look.

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mtbeer
mtbeer

ARRRR!
Location: Charlotte, NC, USA
Member Since: 11th Aug 2004
Total posts: 529
Posted:Written by: xabandonedx
You want to be that guy but warmer? I don't get it.



The guy sounds like he is out for only one thing and succeeds.

I can understand that but I guess I'm just a nice guy at heart. I probably would have started up a conversation while she was sitting there and ruined everything. You know what they say, nice guys finish last. frown


"My skin is singed but it heals my heart and with glowing pride I'll wear my scars." -Davey Havok

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roarfire
roarfire

comfortably numb
Location: The countryside
Member Since: 8th Jul 2004
Total posts: 2676
Posted:Yeah but it was just a dream so it doesn't matter.



He's a little bit arrogant in real life though. I mean, he's wacky, funny, in a band that's going to go really far...I don't blame him for being arrogant..



Wishful thinking for me though

EDITED_BY: xabandonedx (1103511745)


.All things are beautiful if we take the time to look.

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Spanner
Spanner

remembers when it was all fields round here
Location: in the works... somewhere...
Member Since: 27th Feb 2003
Total posts: 2790
Posted:Written by: xabandonedx

Does anyone else feel this way about dreams?!



Yes smile

Written by:
How stupid does all this sound? Whiney and teeny methinks.



No it doesn't. Not to me, anyway smile

I have very vivid dreams. Occasionally, they predict things. Like one I had about a school friend, who was at the time in a wheelchair with bolts in his legs. In my dream, he was standing on his own, without his chair, on a hill and smiling into the sunlight. A few years later, I returned to the town I went to school in and bumped into him doing exactly that smile

Recently my dreams have left me slightly melancholy upon waking, but later in the day I think back on them and feel happier about them. Sometimes they're nicer than real life ubblol but after a lot of thought, it's useful to remember the good parts which aren't happening in your life at the moment, but which realistically could be, and to make them so smile


"I thought you are man, but
you are nice woman.

yay,

:R"

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roarfire
roarfire

comfortably numb
Location: The countryside
Member Since: 8th Jul 2004
Total posts: 2676
Posted:Thanks Spanner, I don't like having vivid dreams anymore, it just ends up getting me down because I'm always wishing they'd happen in real life. I don't think I can make these dreams so because he's out of my 'league' if you will. So I will continue to wallow in my pool of fantasy!

.All things are beautiful if we take the time to look.

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_Aime_
_Aime_

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Hastings
Member Since: 2nd Jan 2004
Total posts: 4172
Posted:You know us girls worry ourself stupid thinking 'does he like me?' 'will he think stupid if i ask him out?' when really theres no need for it. Whats wrong with just being friends and just seeing how things go?
Plus, if I had dreams like you where I could inject myself with an orgasm I wouldn't be complaining wink


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roarfire
roarfire

comfortably numb
Location: The countryside
Member Since: 8th Jul 2004
Total posts: 2676
Posted:Hahah deary me, I remember that dream!



Crazyness.

EDITED_BY: xabandonedx (1103531956)


.All things are beautiful if we take the time to look.

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OrangeBobo
OrangeBobo

veteran
Location: Guelph, ON, Canada
Member Since: 21st Nov 2003
Total posts: 1389
Posted:I had a bad dream lastnight too... I was with my (kind of) boyfriend, and we were walking in some dark place, and these people jumped us, and took him away, and tied me up and this tall creepy guy beat me with a pole, and I could see them dragging him away, and I think I was screaming for him.... And the dream before that (because they kinda connect in ways you can never figure out when awake) I think I was at some weird quiet party or something, and got taken home by another creepy guy, and I think I was raped by him... for some reason after the first dream, I can clearly remember the words 'black and oily' in my head... Also, I think it was mostly black and white, and with no sound, but only my thoughts making sound!!!

I woke up to the realization that Christoph isn't here yet, and that I found out my best friend in Canada is anorexic, which I found out last night. Also, I was talking to my mum about the divorce. A lot of heavy stuff... And I got a sore throat lastnight, slightly before I went to sleep.... I'm in a depressive mood today frown The nightmares from lastnight really make me sad....

*wants to forget it all*

~ bobo


wie weit, wie weit noch?
fragst mich, wo wir gewesen sind...
du fehlst hier

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stickman
World Champ Procrastinator
Location: ||...lost...||
Member Since: 25th Jul 2004
Total posts: 580
Posted:wow bobo.. that sounds like a realy hefty couple of nights

if i had dreams like those i think id purposely become an insomniac for fear of going back to sleep.

dreams are scary in a way, cuz they show you the possible realities that can never be, no matter if they are good or bad.


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OrangeBobo
OrangeBobo

veteran
Location: Guelph, ON, Canada
Member Since: 21st Nov 2003
Total posts: 1389
Posted:couple of nights? my dear,that was ALL last night!!

~ Bobo


wie weit, wie weit noch?
fragst mich, wo wir gewesen sind...
du fehlst hier

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lunernia
member

Member Since: 24th Aug 2004
Total posts: 110
Posted:my dreams drive me mad, i get really bad flashback nightmares. ive had alot of bad things happen to me in the past and my head plays them up and make it all really slow so i remember everything, most days i wake up in a panic or close to tears. iam getting sleeping pills soon, that should help put me into a deeper sleep and stop them.. dunno!

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Mr Majestik
Mr Majestik

coming to a country near you
Location: home of the tiney toothy bear
Member Since: 9th Mar 2004
Total posts: 4693
Posted:thats nasty, i dont normally have bad dreams, they're normally crazy and random like me! i seem to love sleep because its like being sedated, you dont have to do or face anything......

"but have you considered there is more to life than your eyelids?"

jointly owned by Fire_Spinning_Angel and Blu_Valley

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OrangeBobo
OrangeBobo

veteran
Location: Guelph, ON, Canada
Member Since: 21st Nov 2003
Total posts: 1389
Posted:That's what it's normally like for me too Majestik! Just not that night... lastnight was blissful non-dream sleep smile

~ Bobo


wie weit, wie weit noch?
fragst mich, wo wir gewesen sind...
du fehlst hier

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_Clare_
_Clare_

Still wiggling
Location: Belfast
Member Since: 22nd Oct 2002
Total posts: 5967
Posted:Glad to hear you got a good night Bobo... the sore throat might have come from the stress and being run down - do you take any vitamins?

Luneria, is there anything your doc can give you that doesn't involve sleeping pills? Natural remedies can work too, without all the nasty chemicals. Take care hug


Getting to the other side smile

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My hairs on fire
My hairs on fire

If its got pistons or boobs, its gonna be expensive...
Location: Cyprus
Member Since: 21st Oct 2004
Total posts: 515
Posted:Be carefull with the sleeping pills if you do go for them tho darlin. Speakin from experiance it can be very easy to cuild up a dependance on them to fall asleap. Plus waking up with a stonking headache everymorning tends to put you in a bad mood for the rest of the day, did me anyway!
Well hope everything works out smile

Bobo - Happy to hear you had a good night sleep, i wouldent wish a bad dream on anyone as they reali can be upsetting and get to you quite easily hug


Henry Hill - 'One day the kids from the neighbourhood carried my mothers groceries all the way home, you know why? It was out of respect'...

ahmet_20valve_ahmet(at)hotmail(dot)com
Hope all is well : )

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OrangeBobo
OrangeBobo

veteran
Location: Guelph, ON, Canada
Member Since: 21st Nov 2003
Total posts: 1389
Posted:Yeah, it was just a lot of stress, all at once, and just killed me. But, like I said, two bad nights, one crying fit, and one good, long, dreamless sleep later, I'm back on top of the world. But my host family was so worried about me because I was so sad... There is so much drama going on at home right now, and I'm still here for another 7.5 months. Ah well! Having a good day biggrin

Thanks though guys, you rule! hughughug

~ Bobo


wie weit, wie weit noch?
fragst mich, wo wir gewesen sind...
du fehlst hier

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teejay_blue
teejay_blue

mikes bitch
Location: manchester/northampton/where t...
Member Since: 21st Oct 2004
Total posts: 387
Posted:mostly wen i wake up im rather amused at the randomness of wot i just dreamt but occasionly it works the opposite way, all my dreams r so vivid it always take me a minute or to to figure out whether its a dream or real so wen im havin a nightmare its horrible wen i wake up as well!!

last nite i dreamt about my ex-boyfriends 2 kids. weird. i havnt seen them for over a year, i love them so much. i dreamt that i met them for the frist time in a year n charli [his daughter now 10] was so excied to c me then after an hour or so just turned around n sed i want u to leave i dont want to be around u or c u ever again. i woke up absolutely ballin my eyes out n then confused coz i was lying in bed with my new bloke. it took me about 3 or 4 mins to realise it was a dream. i was so scared in that time tho.

erm... yer... sorry, random rant there....
not sure were that came from...


Those who danced were thought to be quite insane by those who could not hear the music - angela monet.

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My hairs on fire
My hairs on fire

If its got pistons or boobs, its gonna be expensive...
Location: Cyprus
Member Since: 21st Oct 2004
Total posts: 515
Posted:hug

Henry Hill - 'One day the kids from the neighbourhood carried my mothers groceries all the way home, you know why? It was out of respect'...

ahmet_20valve_ahmet(at)hotmail(dot)com
Hope all is well : )

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