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Forums > Social Chat > Neighborly Xmas advice needed

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spritie
SILVER Member since Sep 2001

spritie

Pooh-Bah
Location: Galveston, TX, USA

Total posts: 2014
Posted:I have a dilemma at the moment. I live in an apartment complex and have several elderly neighbors. There is one man in particular that has looked out for me over the two years that I have lived here. He leaves me little notes on the windshield of my car. These are mostly about the safety of my car and my belongings. I think it's sweet that he looks out for me.

Today, he left a christmas card on my windshield for me to find. I thought that was really sweet as well and was going to leave one on his truck before i went home to my parents for the holiday. Well, he just knocked on my door to deliver me an envelope (he's knocked occassionally before). The envelope said heidi's pet - her sewing machine. He also said merry christmas, which I wished him as well. I said thank you with a bewildered look on my face (he's seen me cart my sewing machine out to my car on several occassions). He walks away, and I go inside to open the envelope. There is a note which says "I don't know what your sewing machine wants/needs so I'll leave the decision to you". There is also $50 in cash.

So, what do I do about this? I wasn't planning on getting anything for him, but now feel really weird. He isn't employed and I think on disability (may be just retired) so I'm all confused. Does anyone have any ideas for me?


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Catalyst
SILVER Member since Nov 2003

Catalyst

member
Location: Virginia, Vatican City

Total posts: 103
Posted:yeah, you should definately get him something...even if it means using some of the money that he gave you. If you don't know about what he likes, you could always go with a hat and a scarf and a few lottery tickets for the chance winning!!!! You don't have to spend too much money, but a token would be nice!!

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spritie
SILVER Member since Sep 2001

spritie

Pooh-Bah
Location: Galveston, TX, USA

Total posts: 2014
Posted:thanks. I have absolutely no idea what he likes. All I know about him is what his truck looks like and that he has a rather old looking dog. He lives in an efficiency apartment. I do like the lottery idea, and wish I knew more about him so that I could get something more thoughtful. He seems kinda lonely.

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Yex
BRONZE Member since Aug 2004

Yex

Member
Location: Kamloops BC, Canada

Total posts: 97
Posted:make him something which requires your sewing machine. blanket maybe? other than that i really havent a clue.

"Not all who wander are lost. "

J.R.R. Tolkien

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ladyilanah
BRONZE Member since Sep 2003

ladyilanah

member
Location: Des Moines, Iowa, USA

Total posts: 62
Posted:You usually can't go wrong with some nice Christmas cookies or chocolate chip cookies.... if you get the mix it only takes about 15 minutes to bake them.... maybe a card with them?

Alternatively, I like the idea of making him something using your sewing machine. But that may take more time than you actually have before Christmas...

Gosh, what a sweet guy! hug

Ilanah


If I can't dance, I don't want your revolution.

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Posted:How about an Xmas Card with a Thank You!
Just because someone gives you something doesn't mean you are beholden to return the gesture.
Xmas is about giving purely from a spirit of giving. Not expecting anything in return. Just my opinion!


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Catalyst
SILVER Member since Nov 2003

Catalyst

member
Location: Virginia, Vatican City

Total posts: 103
Posted:No, just because someone gives you something, it doesn't mean that you have to give something back, it just seems that the guy is probably lonely, and would appreciate something. You don't have to spend too much money. And, now that you've mentioned the dog.....you could get the dog some treats or a toy or something. The cookies are a good idea too!!! Treats for him and for the doggie!!

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My hairs on fire


My hairs on fire

If its got pistons or boobs, its gonna be expensive...
Location: Cyprus

Total posts: 515
Posted:if he seems lonley, knock on his door with a crimbo card and sum cookies. Sit down with him and have a wee chat for a while with a cup of tea or sumthin, im sure he would love that smile

Henry Hill - 'One day the kids from the neighbourhood carried my mothers groceries all the way home, you know why? It was out of respect'...

ahmet_20valve_ahmet(at)hotmail(dot)com
Hope all is well : )

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Flame Boy
GOLD Member since Jul 2004

Flame Boy

veteran
Location: Out, United Kingdom

Total posts: 1508
Posted:Does he have any visiting family (or going to visit someone), if not, why not invite him over on xmas for a drink, maybe even for dinner?

AAARRRGGGHHH!!! My giant stick broke!!! In two!!! My stick broke in two!!! ubbcrying

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Gnor
BRONZE Member since Mar 2003

Gnor

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Perth, Australia

Total posts: 5814
Posted:I like the idea of making something for him but a few pople warned me not to be too chummy with neighbours and live in each others pockets. It sounds like you have a good relationship with your neighbours and support each other without being intrusive. If you dont normally go to each others places but you want to get together maybe do an invite for a cuppa outside as a picnic.Invite a few of the elderly neighbours for a festive picnic if you are feeling energetic.

How about making his notepad a sewn and glued cover wink or a coat for his dog biggrin


Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?

Im in a lonely battle with the world with a fish to match the chip on my shoulder. Gnu in Binnu in a cnu

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Borath


Borath

member
Location: Cheltenham, England

Total posts: 64
Posted:Of course, it's the thought that counts, and you can't price your time so spending a few hours with him would be a really nice idea. Alternatively, if you have a bit of flair in any of the arts, making him something small would be lovely too. People really appreciate a painting or a sketch from someone because they expended time and energy on making it for them.

But, a tin of shortbread, hot chocolate and some Christmas film would be my choice, that way you can enjoy it too.


I can't be evil; I'm wearing pink.

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ladyilanah
BRONZE Member since Sep 2003

ladyilanah

member
Location: Des Moines, Iowa, USA

Total posts: 62
Posted:Geez, Gnor... where do you live that you can suggest a picnic this time of year? I'm freezing my friggin' *censored* off here....



Man, I really should get out of the cold part of the world! But all my stuff is here... rolleyes



Ilanah

EDITED_BY: ladyilanah (1103451253)


If I can't dance, I don't want your revolution.

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Vixen
SILVER Member since Jan 2004

Vixen

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Oxfordshire/Wiltshire, United ...

Total posts: 3276
Posted:Did you get/do anything in the end?? I would make something using the sewing machine to say thank you. xxx

tHeReS gOoD aNd EvIl iN EaCh InDiViDuAl fIrE, iDeNtIfIeS nEeDs AnD fEeDs OuR dEsIrEs.

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spritie
SILVER Member since Sep 2001

spritie

Pooh-Bah
Location: Galveston, TX, USA

Total posts: 2014
Posted:I haven't had a chance to do anything yet. I'm still uncertain as to whether I should keep the money or not. If the amount was smaller, I wouldn't have any qualms, but to me $50 seems like a lot of money. If I had opened the envelope while he was still standing there, I would have returned it as I feel that is way too much to give me. But, since he already left, I don't know how to go about returning it without really hurting his feelings as I don't think he meant anything harmful by it.

I have had suggestions of making him something for his dog or making him a blanket out of fleece. There is no way I would be able to do either of those before leaving town for my parents for the holidays. I have also had mention of baking him some cookies or giving him some tupperware containers of home cooked food. I think I may have time to bake the cookies if they ever get the heat turned back on in my apartment (it has broken 3 times over the weekend, so I'm avoiding staying here if I can).


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Vixen
SILVER Member since Jan 2004

Vixen

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Oxfordshire/Wiltshire, United ...

Total posts: 3276
Posted:At the end of the day i dont think he would of given you the money unless he really wanted to... hes obviously quite fond of you. At least by buying and making some kind of blanket you will be returning some of the money. And he will know that you used the money the way he wanted. Maybe you could make the cookies for before xmas.

I think with older people all they want is company and someone to listen to them. xxx


tHeReS gOoD aNd EvIl iN EaCh InDiViDuAl fIrE, iDeNtIfIeS nEeDs AnD fEeDs OuR dEsIrEs.

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ladyilanah
BRONZE Member since Sep 2003

ladyilanah

member
Location: Des Moines, Iowa, USA

Total posts: 62
Posted:Maybe at this point since you're heat is on the fritz you could just buy some cookies at the store and repackage them in red saran wrap or something. I'm not saying try to pass them off as homemade but you can always explain about the heat thing, not being home because of that so not able to bake in your own oven...etc...

It really is the thought that counts sometimes. Especially if you're a busy person, as most of us are this time of year.

Ilanah juggle


If I can't dance, I don't want your revolution.

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ladyilanah
BRONZE Member since Sep 2003

ladyilanah

member
Location: Des Moines, Iowa, USA

Total posts: 62
Posted:I just got a mental image of one of my best Christmases ever... living on a tiny salary, still in college, living in a fleabag aparment. I had spoken to the girl next door but we weren't friends or anything. On Christmas morning she brought me a plate of food and homemade Christmas cookies. I invited her in and we became best friends after that. I don't live in that state anymore and we have lost touch but I will never forget it.

ubblove

Ilanah


If I can't dance, I don't want your revolution.

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Doc Lightning
GOLD Member since May 2001

Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

Total posts: 13920
Posted:Spritie,

Sounds like he's lonely. Maybe the best gift you can give him is a plate of the best cookies you can make and some company to enjoy them with. smile


-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

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spritie
SILVER Member since Sep 2001

spritie

Pooh-Bah
Location: Galveston, TX, USA

Total posts: 2014
Posted:Thanks for the help and ideas guys.

I think I've decided to make him some banana nut bread (I don't bake so well, so my cookies would probably turn out horrid). I know he probably wants some conversation, but I honestly don't know what to say to him (bad, I know), so I plan on giving them to him just before I leave town on Thursday. I've never actually knocked on his door before, so it will be weird for me giving them to him.


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Mistress_Maledicti


Heaven doesn't want me, and Hell is afraid I'll take over
Location: Wolverhampton

Total posts: 192
Posted:That's a lovely gesture from him, perhaps he regards you as a kind of surrogate grandchild or something? Making him something in return is a good idea, and perhaps including a little treat or two for his dog too.

sin


"Abashed, the Devil stood and saw how awful Goodness is"

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spritie
SILVER Member since Sep 2001

spritie

Pooh-Bah
Location: Galveston, TX, USA

Total posts: 2014
Posted:what would an older dog like? I've never had a pet, so really don't know these things. She seems rather old for toys.

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Mistress_Maledicti


Heaven doesn't want me, and Hell is afraid I'll take over
Location: Wolverhampton

Total posts: 192
Posted:Try going to a pet store and have a look at what kind of treats they've got for dogs - things like chocolate drops or chewy bones or something would probably be good. If the dog's a "senior", they may have something specially designed for older animals.

sin


"Abashed, the Devil stood and saw how awful Goodness is"

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