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PyroWill
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

PyroWill

HoP's Barman. Trapped aged 6 months
Location: Staines

Total posts: 4437
Posted:Hi guys,
Apologies for the possible dulcit tone of this post because as you can guess i'm experiencing mixed feelings right now.

She is no longer using this site so for the few of you that may be saying he must be mad for typing all this where she can see it. Anyway i wont bore you lot with the specific details but it went along the 'i dont appreciate her enough' etc the whole argument started because she said she said how she was thinking of getting jenna jamesons biography and said something like shes the kind of porn star she'd like to be if she was one cos she liked her attitude, i then said yeh ive got a poster of her (a good one curteous of FHM so its not like JJ's typical poses lol it is reasonably decent, and she flipped saying how it was disrespecting her and to anyone who sees it its making a statement saying how i believe in lust not love and how i want to promote to everyone that i dont have a gf or something, she totally flipped, i said lke im really sorry i cans ee where your coming from i'll take it down etc but she just went on and on looking so far into it, im like look guys put posters on their walls, and it turned out that she wouldnt mind me putting britney spears of a poster like that on my wall, it was the fact that i had a poster of JJ on my wall, a pornstar.
so what!! i cant see how JJ ona poster is different from britney doing the same pose, its not like a really explicit one or anything, and anyway she cant complain abt her being on there considering she had only just said thats the sort of pornstar she would be!

so anyway the argument escalated from there i said she was childish and petty for going on so long abt these things, ok i do understand but she went on for so long and she got so bitchy and giving me attitude etc andit just kept escalating resurrecting old arguments and she said how i was like a boy racer!! and she dont wanna be 'no chick'!! where the hell did she get all that from!! she has a problem like that, shes so over dramatic and stuff and looks far too much into things
so to cut a long story short she started saying things like u want a slapper go get one and stuff (can u belive all this was cos of a poster) and she goes go get your slapper your single now etc she wants nothing more to do with me, she wants to be with a man who doesnt act like a kid by putting posters of pornstars on their walls, i mostly feel bad for her cos she was talking about cutting herself and slightly more serious things, im really scared for her, shes not replying to my texts or anything, says she has severed all contact with me n stuff, she was saying how i was her everything etc and how she wanted to be with me for the rest of her life n stuff, its been 11 months together and i kinda got a bit freaked, i dunno maybe im on of those typical scared of commitment kind of guys

tell me honestly if i was in the wrong about all this which i thought originally i was but everyone was going how she was childish and went too far etc
i guess im just worried how she is taking this, even though she did the dumping, to be honest i dont know how she can handle this, i seemed to always be her strength, im pretty sad too, feel very melancholic, i will really miss her, sorry im not very good at conveying myfeelings, that was one of her reasons too actually

sorry just having a rant


An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind

Give a man a fish and he'll eat 4 a day hit a man with a brick and you can have all his fish and his wife

"Will's to pretty for prison" - Simian

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UCOF
SILVER Member since Apr 2002

UCOF

Carpal \'Tunnel


Total posts: 15414
Posted:*Does a happy dance*

Sounds to me like you are better off without her.

You know you are.

:o)


Im going to be on msn so you know where i am if you need and sympathy/ attention/ approval/ praise/ support/ beer.

hug


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PyroWill
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

PyroWill

HoP's Barman. Trapped aged 6 months
Location: Staines

Total posts: 4437
Posted:maybe

thanks though smile


An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind

Give a man a fish and he'll eat 4 a day hit a man with a brick and you can have all his fish and his wife

"Will's to pretty for prison" - Simian

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Pink...?
BRONZE Member since Apr 2002

Pink...?

Mistress of Pink...Multicoloured
Location: Over There

Total posts: 6140
Posted:hug

She was in the wrong not you honey.


Never pick up a duck in a dungeon...

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babajaga
BRONZE Member since Aug 2004

babajaga

old hand
Location: Berlin, Germany

Total posts: 863
Posted:I was following some incident here on HoP and in my view she insist too much on being a strong woman though there is a lack of self-confidence, as far as I see, she doesn't accept her weaknesses therefore she is jealous coz of this poster.
I don't know her experience and had only a short look on the whole thing take your time to get over it.
Then there is maybe a friendship possible.
In my view you guys got to know at the wrong point of time.
Take care
hug hug hug hug hug


What is psychology?- Looking for a black cat in a dark room. What is psychoanalysis? Psychoanalysis is looking for a black cat in a dark room -- in which there is no cat -- but finding one anyway.

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PyroWill
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

PyroWill

HoP's Barman. Trapped aged 6 months
Location: Staines

Total posts: 4437
Posted:na she is saying she wants nothing more to do with me and for me to give her back her stuff and things

An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind

Give a man a fish and he'll eat 4 a day hit a man with a brick and you can have all his fish and his wife

"Will's to pretty for prison" - Simian

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babajaga
BRONZE Member since Aug 2004

babajaga

old hand
Location: Berlin, Germany

Total posts: 863
Posted:I am sorry sometimes it is in this way, unfortunatly, but think of there is nothing wrong with you.
hug2


What is psychology?- Looking for a black cat in a dark room. What is psychoanalysis? Psychoanalysis is looking for a black cat in a dark room -- in which there is no cat -- but finding one anyway.

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Doc Lightning
GOLD Member since May 2001

Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

Total posts: 13920
Posted:So...how do you feel about it? Do you feel happy? Sad? Relieved? Angry?

-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

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PyroWill
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

PyroWill

HoP's Barman. Trapped aged 6 months
Location: Staines

Total posts: 4437
Posted:bit of both really, sad that its over, i think it was something good, but also i think both of us knew that the the reltionship kept hitting lows so maybe it was inevitable, like i said im mostly worried abt her, i hope she is ok, im ok, when things like this happen i like to disregard my emotions so i get quite plain

An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind

Give a man a fish and he'll eat 4 a day hit a man with a brick and you can have all his fish and his wife

"Will's to pretty for prison" - Simian

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Doc Lightning
GOLD Member since May 2001

Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

Total posts: 13920
Posted:I guess it's best to decide if you are happy or at least OK with it. If so, then pick up and move on.

If not, then you need to talk it over with her more.


-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

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Skulduggery
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

Skulduggery

Pirate Pixie Crew Captain
Location: Wales

Total posts: 8428
Posted:Lightning I have the urge to hug you........hug

Will just do what feels right.


Feed me Chocolate!!! Feed me NOW!

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GoldieKing


newbie
Location: Blackpool UK

Total posts: 15
Posted:She was definately in the wrong. Sounds to me like u better off without her. If she's that insecure she'll end it over a poster then sounds like you would have had more to come and you best off outta there. smile

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Lillie Frog


Lillie Frog

not a stranger
Location: wales

Total posts: 558
Posted:Hello Will
I read you post and I thought I'd say that you have my sympathy for your relationship ending like that.
I would also say that although girls can get upset about their blokes looking at pictures of other women it does not seem to be enough to end a relationship over, especiallyas you offered to take it down. Therefore it is possible that she just used the poster as an excuse to start a row,possibly so that she could finish with you.
Lastly I would like to tell you that if she does cut herself, or does anything else foolish it will be because she has chosen to do so for her own reasons. So long as you treated her ok while you were together (and your post makes you sound like a kind and reasonable person) you are not responsiblefor anything she may choose to do to herself now she has finished with you.

I hope that all goes well for you both in the future, wether you are together or apart.
hug hug hug
Big hugs to make you feel better.


Eat when you're hungry
Sleep where it's dry
No one is ever what they seem
Gabriel King - The Wild Road

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Doc Lightning
GOLD Member since May 2001

Doc Lightning

HOP Mad Doctor
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA

Total posts: 13920
Posted:I'll take all the hugs I can get, Skull. smile hug

-Mike )'(
Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella

"A buckuht 'n a hooze!" -Valura

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vanize
SILVER Member since Aug 2001

vanize

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Austin, Texas

Total posts: 3899
Posted:ok, first of all, what is a "slapper"? I've seen two references today and never noticed the terminology before... confused

Second, I have no idea what her point of view is on all this, but I can't drop a woman fast enough if they can't handle a little porn around the house - and what you had doesn't even qualify as as that. Actually, I rarely date women who don't like looking at porn themselves, though I generally find women have slightly different tastes in porn than guys, but hey, that's cool and I'm willing to accomodate! so does this mean I date "slappers"???

But I've gotten a little off topic. I'm actually wondering if she hadn't already known you had a poster of Jenna around and brought up the book just as a trawling device so she didn't seem like a snooper. The way you tell it, I find it a little suspicious that she suddenly had so much ammunition prepared out of the blue if she was really just casually mentioning said autobiography for small talk.


-v-

Wiederstand ist Zwecklos!

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Skulduggery
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

Skulduggery

Pirate Pixie Crew Captain
Location: Wales

Total posts: 8428
Posted:slapper:-

1.fast and loose person wink . Not as bad as calling someone a whore but probably a bit worse than saying they are a hussy.

2.Someone that dresses slutty and leads other people on, but never comes through with the whole deal.



Its a slang word that means different things to different people I guess as 1 and 2 kind of contradict each other a bit. Its a fairly mild way of insulting someone for being a bit slutty.


Feed me Chocolate!!! Feed me NOW!

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Faberg
GOLD Member since Aug 2003

veteran
Location: Dublin, Ireland

Total posts: 1459
Posted:slapper

My mind not only wanders, it sometimes leaves completely smile

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Mistress_Maledicti


Heaven doesn't want me, and Hell is afraid I'll take over
Location: Wolverhampton

Total posts: 192
Posted:I don't know you or her, and I'm well aware that there are always two sides to every story....but I agree with Lillie Frog's assumption that it sounds as if she's using the poster incident as an excuse for an argument. Maybe she wanted to push you into splitting up with her - perhaps because she doesn't want to do it herself and wants you to have all the guilt.

As for the fact she's threatened to cut herself etc and isn't answering texts and calls...well, based purely on her reaction to the poster on your wall, I'd say she's a bit of a drama queen. Leave her to get over it - you'll probably find that she was just trying to get a reaction out of you.


"Abashed, the Devil stood and saw how awful Goodness is"

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Rainbow Bright
SILVER Member since Aug 2004

Rainbow Bright

member
Location: Bournemouth,UK

Total posts: 44
Posted:Aaaah,Pyro,big hugs mate hug
Sounds like the girl has issues! LillieFrog and Gothmuppet hit the nail on the head there,no-one breaks up with someone they care about over a poster!Theres got to be another reason,and if shes not prepared to be honest about it,then youre better off without her.
Dont mean to be harsh,you obviously care about her,but if youre having major arguments about silly little things,its not really a match made in heaven is it?
Take it easy,dont let her play mind games with you,if shes threatening to harm herself,its more than likely that she wont,thats a typical control freak move.people who do harm themselves dont usually tell anyone beforehand.
I do feel for you hun,arguments and break ups are awful,but its all a learning experience,its how we figure out what we want from a partner,and what we want a relationship to be like,then we know what to look for.
Oneday true love will come and smack you in the face,usually when youre least expecting it,but be patient,it may take some time,but its definitely worth the wait!
hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug hug


More colourful than a box of crayons!

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PyroWill
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

PyroWill

HoP's Barman. Trapped aged 6 months
Location: Staines

Total posts: 4437
Posted:right i better elaborate slightly, some of those arguments which i said i wont bore you with (just u guys seem to think it was just the poster) the poster sort of sparked the argument, she says how ive changed since going to university, she says im two faced and how i only do things to be popular, which really isnt true, she says i dont appreciate her and a lot of other things, which really isnt true, i belive she is really insecure and an attention seeker, she has started texting me now but its not nice, basically she says how she never wants to talk to me again yet she contstantly keeps sending me texts insulting me and saying all sorts of things like god i hate you and i hope your feeling really bad and stuff, thats prob the reason why im feeling so bad i hate it that someone i cared about hates me so much, its a nasty feeling, but i guess now she is proving how maybe she isnt worth it, i dunno, feel ill, not gonna go to my tutorials today, got a job interview at 5 aswell, need to cheer up in time for that!

An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind

Give a man a fish and he'll eat 4 a day hit a man with a brick and you can have all his fish and his wife

"Will's to pretty for prison" - Simian

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c00kie


c00kie

member
Location: Oxford, UK

Total posts: 101
Posted:It really sounds like she's trying to get a rise out of you.
She is probably feeling very angry and upset and doesn't quite know how to deal with it, so taking it out on you seems like the best solution!

It seems that she is waiting for you to to reply to her texts saying how upset you are and want her back etc etc....so that she can feel better.

My advice is distance, don't reply, call, e-mail, it will settle in a week or so, once things are put in perspective. smile


Life is too short.....lets party naked!

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babajaga
BRONZE Member since Aug 2004

babajaga

old hand
Location: Berlin, Germany

Total posts: 863
Posted:I had this little chat with her here I don't think she is a bad person,
The text thing is just to raise her self-confidence again (that is her main problem) and she is using you for that, I know, not the best thing. She hasn't learned yet that it has to come from herself not from outside. She uses others to deal with herself.
As far as I see and the little conversation I had with her.
Care for yourself it will be better. hug


What is psychology?- Looking for a black cat in a dark room. What is psychoanalysis? Psychoanalysis is looking for a black cat in a dark room -- in which there is no cat -- but finding one anyway.

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PyroWill
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

PyroWill

HoP's Barman. Trapped aged 6 months
Location: Staines

Total posts: 4437
Posted:ok now she is being really childish, on her msn she has her sign in name things like down boys, and just cos im single doesnt mean im desperate and things, basically shes trying to show now how shes wanted material and shes trying ti get a rise out of me, maybe i am better off without her

An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind

Give a man a fish and he'll eat 4 a day hit a man with a brick and you can have all his fish and his wife

"Will's to pretty for prison" - Simian

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babajaga
BRONZE Member since Aug 2004

babajaga

old hand
Location: Berlin, Germany

Total posts: 863
Posted:that is what I am talking about, just care for yourself don't care about that sh!t, she will be all right later and yes right now you are better off without her (only my view smile )

What is psychology?- Looking for a black cat in a dark room. What is psychoanalysis? Psychoanalysis is looking for a black cat in a dark room -- in which there is no cat -- but finding one anyway.

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PyroWill
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

PyroWill

HoP's Barman. Trapped aged 6 months
Location: Staines

Total posts: 4437
Posted:yeh, right now, im just gonna ignore her, i dont need this [censored]

An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind

Give a man a fish and he'll eat 4 a day hit a man with a brick and you can have all his fish and his wife

"Will's to pretty for prison" - Simian

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Gayle......!
SILVER Member since Jul 2004

Pooh-Bah
Location: Bristol !!!!!!

Total posts: 2444
Posted:I think this all sounds way out of proportition and by the sounds of it was waiting to happen from her point of view and the poster/book thing gave her a way out. I was just wondering if you were going out so long how come she didn't know you had the poster and if she wanted to be like JJ they surely she'd be flattered you liked her too so i agree with the book being the leading question. I think you fell into a nasty trap and if i was you - remain civil if it's possiable, if it's not change your number and walk away and find someone who really loves you for your JJ poster!!

Good Luck - in my experience it gets very bad then one day you wake up and it's not so bad and it gets better and easier each day.
hug


Gayle.....!

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Mistress_Maledicti


Heaven doesn't want me, and Hell is afraid I'll take over
Location: Wolverhampton

Total posts: 192
Posted:If she's texting you then at least you know she didn't follow through on her self-harming threats which is a good thing. The nasty side of the texts is just her anger coming out - she wants you to feel bad, probably because she's upset and she wants to make sure you feel worse than she does.

Don't rise to it, just ignore her texts, don't even bother to read them. In a couple of days she'll wake up and realise what a complete spazzbucket she's been.

Be guided by the wisdom of my *very* advanced years!!

PS: Good luck with the interview!


"Abashed, the Devil stood and saw how awful Goodness is"

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PyroWill
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

PyroWill

HoP's Barman. Trapped aged 6 months
Location: Staines

Total posts: 4437
Posted:i will take advantage of your years smile oh well im watching spaced, alwaqys good to cheer me up, thanks guys smile

An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind

Give a man a fish and he'll eat 4 a day hit a man with a brick and you can have all his fish and his wife

"Will's to pretty for prison" - Simian

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PyroWill
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

PyroWill

HoP's Barman. Trapped aged 6 months
Location: Staines

Total posts: 4437
Posted:i dunno what to do, i always felt (and feel) that she is a part of me, and now she is gone, i feel empty frown

An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind

Give a man a fish and he'll eat 4 a day hit a man with a brick and you can have all his fish and his wife

"Will's to pretty for prison" - Simian

Delete

Denny


Denny

Here again gone again
Location: Central London

Total posts: 157
Posted:"This too shall pass". Trite, but true. Some things, the only thing that will help is getting some distance from it, and only the passing of time can give you that. In the meantime, focus on the things you like about your life right now, and enjoy those.

"Talk hard"

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PyroWill
GOLD Member since Aug 2004

PyroWill

HoP's Barman. Trapped aged 6 months
Location: Staines

Total posts: 4437
Posted:yeh i guess so, i like your avatar denny

An eye for an eye only ends up making the whole world blind

Give a man a fish and he'll eat 4 a day hit a man with a brick and you can have all his fish and his wife

"Will's to pretty for prison" - Simian

Delete

Page: 12

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