557 posts
Location: The Underworld

Hello Everyone,

Bit of a serious 1 I'm afraid. I've recieved a message from from the board detailing complaints that have been made regarding my posts, or more specifically, the language I use.
Apparently I've offended some of my fellow HOPers,
and for this I offer my sincerest appologies.
Any offence caused, was done so innoccently I asure you.

Anyone who knows me will testify that I'm a little insane. About 50percent of the language I use is slang. It is to my understanding that a few of the non-English members are irritated by by the use of slang in my posts. While I simpathize, I think it's completely unfair that I'm being asked to change who I am, simply because there are 1 or 2 of you that have difficulty understanding me. I'd like to point out that I often have difficulty understaning others, but I have no problem with accepting this as I feel it adds to diversity of the group.
I understand perfectly how derogatory terms such as 'Niggaz', are completely unessesary, and will refrain from using them in future, however my use of such terms are in no way any less innocent than the rest of my 'slang'.
For EVERYONE I've offended,
Non-Https Image Link


But please don't make me change. HomeOfPoi is so special to me. I've made so many wonderful friends here, and it's one of the few places I feel I can be myself and feel totally comfortable.

Please let me hear your feelings...

Avery deflated DFQ xxx

Az abouve, So below...

SmallBoy - xCarpal \'Tunnel
2,737 posts
Location: London

Yo is a BADDDDDD girl, but I'm sure everyone loves u still...........
And don't be too worried about being deflated, my blow up doll has been that way for months.
Be Cheery Peeps - You are only here to be happy....... and spread the light and happiness
Wait:- People actually moderate the language here? Fuck, I'll get writing my apology thread now.............

Small Lardy Person In Disguise

1,551 posts
Location: the arms of the Ganja Goddess

Me offended!? No no no, no need to apologize 2 me DFQ, you be a very kool person in my point of view. But maybe that be b/c I am insane as well. Now remember, live according to the prophecy.

You. Its whats for dinner!

As time passes, you realise all the mistakes you amde and the ones you wish you never did make.

The wave crashing on the beach

DomBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
3,009 posts
Location: Bristol, UK

I'm lucky, I know you, and you know I love you exactly as you are. And espically when you're wearing rubber gloves

For technical posts I'm all in favour of posting in best english as it helps people understand and is also searchable, but in social posts I reckon freedom of expression is the important. I can see how it's confusing to other people, but to stop you posting as you do is like asking American's to stop saying things like "Yo", "Wassup" and "Y'all". As much as we'd like them to shut up, that's part of who they are

So I reckon you keep doing what you're doing.


1,551 posts
Location: the arms of the Ganja Goddess

Yis, I agree with you DOm. I would like to send a big Shame on you to the people who narked on DFQ. How would you like it if we went and complained about you being yourselves, and therefore you felt extremely bad about being yourself. I think an apologie is in order to DFQ, because we cannot forget FREEDOM OF SPEECH

You. Its whats for dinner!

As time passes, you realise all the mistakes you amde and the ones you wish you never did make.

The wave crashing on the beach

382 posts
Location: Southampton

Just before you wrote this thread I was thinking about how quality your replies are, as well as twirlyvic's, cassandra's, kyrian's, c@ntus's and tons of others too so please don't change who you are, just make sure all the non Brits get to appreciate your style too...

[ 15 June 2002, 03:46: Message edited by: pyrophile ]

A conspiracy of silence speaks louder than words...

557 posts
Location: The Underworld


Non-Https Image Link

Awww u guyz r da best! I just hope others feel the same. Dom ur point of keeping it simple in Technical is a good wun, got no problem wiv dat..
Do u think it'll make a difference If I start putting tranlations at the bottom of ma posts?


Az abouve, So below...

4,308 posts
Location: York, England

lol DFQ, don't change ur slang hun it's fun to figure out! but, as dom mentioned, you might want to chaneg it for technical posts. simply because half the time people are getting headaches reading those things even when the english is perfect... hehehehe

as far as swearing..... eh... i mean, it happens, it's ok, but i'd watch stuff like niggaz... or at least mention here and there that you really don't mean bad by it, some people hurt easily, you can't see them bieng hurt, and they can't see that ur jokin... just a thought...

Keep your dream alive
Dreamin is still how the strong survive

Shalom VeAhavah

New Hampshire has a point....

Fairy Ladymember
63 posts
Location: fairieland

DFQ- I luv (love) the way you talk. Before I became a member I liked 2(to) read ur (your) posts just to c (see) if eye (I) could figure them out. now itz like a 2nd (second) language. I enjoy HoP (Home of Poi) and all of itz nuances!
Fairy Lady

lollipurple penguin- soon to be
478 posts
Location: playing with the pixies at the arsse end of the mi...

DFQ please PUUUUUUUUUURLEAZE dont ever change, you're an amazing insane person who i, and everyone else here loves so much.. . . so some things some people find inappropiate, such is life. im sure they can see now how sincer you were about not meaning it in any sort of offensive way and will be fine with you being yourself, i mean who would really want it otherwise.

hugs and fluff
lolli x x x x

My spelling wobbles. its very good spelling but it wobbles, and the letters get in the wrong place

KaliBRONZE Member
577 posts
Location: Berlin, Germany

Well, I was going to forgive you, but then I saw that you werent coming out to Paris next weekend....Just kidding. I love the way you write and figuring out what the hell youre saying is half the fun. Makes it more interesting and all.
Just one question Im not clear on - were people offended by your language or by the fact that they couldnt understand it?

Beauty is the conscious sum of all our perversions.-Salvador DaliHope without action is hopeless.

master sodiummember
536 posts
Location: carson city, nevada

I noticed alot of people saying "protect freedom of speech", which is great, I do agree with it. but only to a point. you do need to take other people into consideration. if I were to put up a post saying something against mexicans, africans, asains, or any other group I would be seriosly harrassed, although it still falls under freedom of speech. I would never do such a thing, but possibly if I were to joke about it on this board, not everyone would know what I was saying.

this isn't to say I've ever been offended by anything darkfairyqueen has said. I always find her to be nice and humourous, and dont understand why people are getting offended, but it happens. people take things the wrong way. it happened in the recruting post I made. truly makes you realise how little emotion is translated into text.

so darkfairyqueen, I dont think you should change who you are. you need to have a slang filled post that could offend alot of people just send me a private message and well offend some people without having to offend them.

you can't have a war against terrorism because war IS's not about worshipping fire. its about making the fire want to worship you.

PeleBRONZE Member
the henna lady
6,193 posts
Location: WNY, USA

I feel the need to explain here that there is a distinct difference between speech and writing. On here, truly, you are not talking you are writing, which visually takes on a different tone in readers minds and not only for those who don't initially speak the language and also those who have disabilities like dyslexia and such, then reading posts such as that becomes a torture not a joy. The rule against slang abbreviation is part of making *EVERYONE* feels at home here.
You were not asked to change who you are. You were not asked to change how you express yourself at all, but how you do it in a visual context as per the rules of the board, which do pop up and request that you write in plain english without the use of slang abbreviations.
All of what you say in slang can be said with "more proper" spelling, and so therefore, you are not being at all asked to change what you say, or even the order of your words, but more carify how you write them.
Freedom of speech applies to context, and the only thing she was asked to curb in that respect are the potentially harmful words (such as Niggaz, which she responded to in a completely respectful and honest way that is appreciated).

All of the abbreviations can be written in plain text which does not impede on anyone's freedom of speech rights at all, and this does not at all change who anyone is at the core, that is not a valid arguement at all. My guess is that school papers, work papers, applications, and such are not filled out in slang so that they can be easier understood by the reader. Why is it any different here? THis is not a rave sub-culture board where everyone speaks the language. There is much more to every person than how they spell on a bb, but not everyone can enjoy or understand that unless you express yourself clearly. This is an arguement that has been had many times before. There are far more than a "few" people who do not speak english as their first language who frequent this board, even though they may not post (for fear their english is bad), so why should they feel to be made unwelcome because people choose to speak in codes? It is not fair to the group at large and that is what was being addressed in the rules when it was written. The full community, both lurkers and posters, not the select and bonded few.
All that is being asked is that the rules are followed and others are being respected. No one is being asked to change who they are all at and I am sorry you feel that way and that how you write here is who you are.
Thank you for the apology and for your future efforts. It is very much appreciated.

Higher, higher burning fire...making music like a choir
"Oooh look! A pub!" -exclaimed after recovering from a stupid fall
"And for the decadence of art, nothing beats a roaring fire." -TMK

1,551 posts
Location: the arms of the Ganja Goddess


You. Its whats for dinner!

As time passes, you realise all the mistakes you amde and the ones you wish you never did make.

The wave crashing on the beach

2,364 posts
Location: austin,tx

don evr fret yosewf aboot wut'na strat folk b tankin. dey veal argue witchu eben if jew got pusketti on yur 'ed. dey jes wan to control demsewf n uvvers, pu'non airs uff whucha call SUPERIORITY n stuff. done care, if you letsum suck yur n'erg den yew canna shoin lak a star dat yew are. if'n dey done unnerestan den dey nebber will, luv. fairy folk, deys not to be unnerstood, deys OVERsTOOD d'udders, wit dem waings'n'all flappin'n'such

-Such a price the gods exact for song: to become what we sing
-Seek freedom and become captive of your desires. Seek discipline and find your liberty.
-When the center of the storm does not move, you are in its path.

RoziSILVER Member
100 characters max...
2,996 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia

Hey DFQ,

I luuuurrve reading your posts. Although I must admit that I always feel cross eyed after YoU moVe InTo tHe RAndoM cApS & loWEr cASe thing

But I do get what the mods are about, (even though I don't feel that way myself) & I understand that they have to act on any complaints. Thats why we have the sheriffs!!

It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.

What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...

StoneGOLD Member
Stream Entrant
2,830 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia

(_!_)'er, DFQ. I hope you weren't kept in after school.

To me it looks like you were censored for self-expression rather than anything else. If a post is difficult to read then most people just pass them by. I reckon the language argument is a bit of a furphy. Language is dynamic, and just keeps changing. Yesterdays slang are new words tomorrow. We certainly don't write like we did in Shakespeare's time, do we?

Also, the net is NEW medium that offers fresh, interesting ways for self-expression. And, to be honest, I don't think you actually broke any of the rules, that you agreed to when you registered. Although, there is a small piece on the home page about not overdoing 's and stuff.


If we as members of the human race practice meditation, we can transcend our fear, despair, and forgetfulness. Meditation is not an escape. It is the courage to look at reality with mindfulness and concentration. Thich Nhat Hanh

Raymund Phule (Fireproof)Enter a "Title" here:
2,905 posts
Location: San Diego California

I find it interesting that you get "hate mail"(thats my own quote) while I get things like, Ray ya piss me off but hell its all good in the end. Actually I find it rather funny, look at the content of some of my posts, maybe I just intimidate people. You can ask Pozee and Kinduin, I am not really intimidating, just an average shmuck who uses this forum to blow off some steem from time to time, I do honestly have those views I just voice them a little louder in here for some dumb reason.

Some Jarhead last night: "this dumb a$$ thinks hes fireproof"

557 posts
Location: The Underworld

First of all I've got to thank each and everyone of you You've all made some extremely valid points, and I'm touched by your kindness.

Pele, there's probably no chance of me changing your angle on this, but I feel I must explain myself a little further. Please believe me when I write that the sincerity of my following statements is absolute.
If I have broken any rules here, it was never my intention. I have the utmost respect for all who help create and keep his site as wonderful as it is, and would never wish to jeopardise my membership for an instant.
I feel I'm still being misunderstood though.
I use accents, regional and worldwide, in my speech when with friends. As I am amongst friends here, when I write I tend to have a certain accent in mind and try to illustrate this in my text. It is in this context I put forward the argument of "changing who I am". I know this is not what you are asking of me, but as an enthusiastic member of this group I ask you to take my personality into account.
Language for me, spoken or written, is an artform. As an artist I enjoy pushing it's boundaries, as do other members. I write the way I do to convey a certain mood, and while it may be a little extreme at times, I think it's unfair I'm being singled out.
Keeping to plain English in the technical threads is a perfectly logical rule, and as written descriptions of the seven beat weave are difficult to grasp at the best of times, this should be respected.
But may I ask of you please , If I tone it down, can I continue writing as I do in the 'social' thread only? Looking at it from your point of view, it must be hard to understand. But I truely would feel uncomfortable changing so drastically. My messages just wouldn't have the same feeling.
I see perfectly how all this could sound so stupid, but these are my views. I hope they come accross as I intended them to.

Peace and respect, D xx

Az abouve, So below...

GlåssDIAMOND Member
The Ministry of Manipulation
2,523 posts
Location: Bristol, United Kingdom

Well DFQ I'd have to forgive you but for 3 things:

1) Who is Joe R who didn't seem to appreciate all those secret love messages I'd been e-mailing him. huh. Stitched us all up nicely there.
You been randomly borrowing your bosses e-mail account to mail us all huh>

2) errm lost mind now
cant remember no.2

3) As I understand it "niggers" the highly derogatory term for black. (Saying Cnut wont offend me, but ever say thet and you'll know I'm pissed off) is different to "Niggaz" which was a corruption and reclaimation of american language by Gangster Rappers. etc etc..
Imagines DFQ as a member of the wu tang clan. tee hee.
But to use it in an international english language board is a bit daft and thoughtless.
Pele has got a bloody good point here.
Especially as I have found out recently to my loss that slang terms often have many different meanings to different people, sometimes

4) The language DFQ-ese is pretty much DFQ in written form, shes a but like that in life you know. Whoopwhoopspledyfloop and all that. Pinng.

5) errm. have those rubber gloves got pink fluffy tops.

6)nice socks.

6) So no, don't you come on here acting all cute and sweet and innocent, looking to win us all over by batting your eyelids, in a sweet little way, with a berretta hidden behind your back so you can wipe us all out just as soon as we let our guard down. yea kids. Thats DARK fairy queen. Theres a reason why its dark, don't be suckered in by the little goldilocks routine. So make sure you wear your crusifix, and carry your holy water while your in this thread.

6) I reckon you should do a HOP pennance, do some HOP good deeds to make up for you SINNNING. YOU SINNNER. Then you should make your signature a disclaimer like Nix? saying
"if you cant understand this, your not missing anything. I'm only little and it dont mean nuffin neway."
Or you could employ Dom as an interpreter.
Be cool and keep smiling

I am a passenger, I stay under ...

Lambretta Fanatic
4,995 posts
Location: United Kingdom

gives DFQ a big *hug*... i loves you all the same.


"To be an angel, one need not have wings.
In giving love there is an equal grace.
Nor need one seek the aura in the face,
As love unveils the beauty of all things."

*Francois Couperin.

ValuraSILVER Member
Mumma Hen
6,391 posts
Location: Brisbane, Australia

DFQ... The world would be a boring place if we all wrote with proper english and kept the tone and pace of our writings on a 'nice even keel'
I think the way that you write helps your personality shine through... you have definatley made me giggle with a lot of the posts you have written.
I think your great and you have never offended me.......
walks off singing 'dont go changing...'

TAJ "boat mummy." VALURA "yes sweetie you went on a boat, was daddy there with you?" TAJ "no, but monkey on boat" VALURA "well then sweetie, Daddy WAS there with you"

falloutboySILVER Member
433 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia, Earth, Milky Way, Universe

"If everybody looked the same, we'd get tired of looking at each other!" - let the craziness flow DFQ!

-As angels debate chance and fate-
i was riding through melbourne on a midget giraffe, things were peachy.

20 posts
Location: Colorado/Florida

This thread disturbes me quite a bit. I understand Pele's argument, but I do not agree with it. Censorship cannot be administered, it has to be voluntary. The way I see it, If you do not like what is being said.. don't listen... or in this case don't read it. If walls are put up around one issue, to block it from offending someone... then noone will be able to say anything, because whatever you say will offend someone somewhere. I do not agree with some slang that I hear.. for example, the term niggaz. I find the term offensive, but I have no right to tell you you cannot say it. And, furthermore if I cannot understand what slang I hear or read then I will not understand the post. There are two options for me now. Well three actually. One: Get mad and demand censorship. Doesn't this seem a bit illogical? Two: I can ignore the post and go on with my life as though I had never read it. Ok my life may get boaring but oh well. Three: I can ask for clarification. Doesn't this seem like the most fair solution to everyone involved. Maybe there should be a disclaimer for everyone at the beginning of the discussion group page that tells you that you may not like what you read. I don't think that it should be necessary but hey... it seems that it is. The bottom line is that if we start censoring here, what is to stop us from censoring everything. We need to keep the posts open and if you do not agree with what is written, ask, or ignore it. Please let us stay as a close knit family instead of a cold pre-packaged forum. That's all I ask.


What?? A gorilla wearing a smoking jacket and grass skirt. So What? Did he have a Sherlock Holmes pipe in his mouth? Ummmmm.... Why?

557 posts
Location: The Underworld

Glass you mashup fiend!! think
Heeee! Joe R is indeed my boss, but twas not my intention for that to happen, honest! Some kinda fek-up with the system at work... Your post iz incredible, wot WERE you on young man?! HooHoo.. missed you at da park 2day
an since wen did 3 mean 6? well, technically, 8, I think you put 6 three times.. HooOwaAH! INSANITY!

PK, a big FAT fairy hug to u!

Valura u crazy chicken! Thankyou so much, you sound like a wickle star! "..rediscover communication!.."

Anuva FAT fairy hug for you falloutboy

Tig. Hello Havn't seen you before! Thanyou for your contribution. You've raised a very good point, the whole freedom of choice issue seems to have escaped through the back door. I look forward to getting to know u you young man/lady, welcome

a Big woOHpdIWOodaH TO ALL YOU CrAYZees!
DFQ xx

Az abouve, So below...

CharlesBRONZE Member
Corporate Circus Arts Entertainer
3,989 posts
Location: Auckland, New Zealand

At the risk of getting some hatemail myself, I feel that this needs to be put into better context...

The intention of the rules here is to make everyone feel welcome.

This includes those whose first language is not english, those with slight or serious dyslexia, people from all walks of life, all countries etc etc etc.

There is no possible way to accommodate every single person who may be on the board, but the current rules do make a huge difference.

Go and have a look at some un-moderated bulletin boards and tell me what the general atmosphere is on them. I have yet to find one that makes most people feel comfortable.


Do you consider it censorship or impinging on freedom of speech to ask people not to talk loudly during a movie?

It's called common courtesy, I'm sorry if people feel offended by that, but it is.

By the way, this board is paid for completely and utterly out of Malcolm's pocket, for the use of us all.

It's not a beach, or a park or a public area, it is a privately owned communal area with high maintenance costs that Malcolm gratiously allows us all to communicate too.

Pele and I are simply trying to keep the board as nice and pleasant a placer as possible. If you wish to make it an unpleasant place for whatever reasons you wish to call it, then that is called being selfish.

Just as someone who talks loudly or otherwise interrupts a movie that others are watching is also called selfish.

Of course it is your choice how you act at the end of the day. But that also means it is my choice how I act, and Malcolm's choice how he acts.

To use the common argument in this thread, you are restricting my freedom of choice by asking me to allow you to frequently and continually break the rules.

The person i am, is someone who's personality wishes to keep this board with the rules and a nice happy place for as many people as possible. To ask me to stop doing that is to try and violate my own rights...

Now, using the same argument from the other side, do you see how flawed it is?

Please, can everyone here respect each other, and the rules, top continue to let HoP be a great place to find out info and socialise.

My thanks to you all.

HoP Posting Guidelines
* Is it the Truth?
* Is it Fair to all concerned?
* Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
* Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?

9,232 posts
Location: NYC, NY, USA

I think that all free speech arguements go out the window since this website is someone's private property, no?

If Malcolm wants to only allow my posts to take up the memory that he is paying for and decides to delete everything else, that's his perogative.

If I'm publishing a book, you don't have first ammendment rights to write a chapter.

Frankly, I'm thankful that this site is moderated and censored. Otherwise we'd all be up to our ears in 12 year olds telling us what to suck.

Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]

Bender_the_OffenderGOLD Member
still can't believe it's not butter
6,979 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia

DFQ's style rocks. No DFQ style would suck.

an emphasis of fun within bounds preferable than an emphasis on political correctness.
On the use of such words as 'niggaz,' i reckon the benefit of the doubt should be applied,
because we all know just how fun and inviting the atmoshphere is here in HoP. Threads like this eliminate the need for HoPers to constantly provide disclaimers that their (often hilarious) posts should not be taken with negative connotations. The rare level of respect on HoP overshadows any implications of such phantoms as racism or bad posture.

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of Leonard Nimoy.

Besides, my main weapon is confusion! I dun wanna lose it to cogitation. my TWO main weapons are confusion, surprise and an almost fanatical devotion to the pope!

Laugh Often, Smile Much, Post lolcats Always

Bender_the_OffenderGOLD Member
still can't believe it's not butter
6,979 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia

DFQ's style defninitely rocks.

An emphasis of fun within bounds preferable than an emphasis on political correctness.
Emphases occur on a sliding scale, and the mods have it right i reckon.
On the use of such words as 'niggaz,' i reckon the benefit of the doubt should be applied,
because we all know just how fun and inviting the atmoshphere is here in HoP. Threads like

this eliminate the need for HoPers to constantly provide disclaimers that their (often

hilarious) posts should not be taken with negative connotations.
yes niggaz, in the wrong connotation is a disgusting remark,
but it is also not if applied in a friendly context. DFQ is guilty of being hip - to construe otherwise is a mistake, and overlooking her friendliness.
The rare enermity of respect on HoP overshadows any implications of such phantoms as racism or bad posture.

There is also the issue of cultural norms - Drea was chocked that I described my 'consumption' as 'a bloody pig'
From an international perspective, I sounds like visceral pig parts when in fact i am meaning to express 'very much'
I guess the onus is on the writer when such breaches in understanding occur.
It is nice, then that on top of the nice play, the mods are out there for our benefit, keeping the peace.
It ain't easy being pleasy.

The needs of the many outweigh the needs of Leonard Nimoy.

On the use of confusion, I have, since a very small age followed the principle:
"When you can't beat them, confuse them"
my main weapon is confusion! I dun wanna lose it to cogitation. my TWO main weapons

are confusion, surprise and an almost fanatical devotion to the pope!

Laugh Often, Smile Much, Post lolcats Always

2,364 posts
Location: austin,tx

i think the real question is, is dfq breaking any rules? she doesnt' seem to be offending any more than a few, and those even were probably stemming from miscommunication, and would probably be nullified with a bit of talking. are the original complainers even mad anymore? sounds like she laid her heart out sincerely.
seems like what we have here is a few in charge who perhaps have good intentions, but in their evolution toward being good leaders may have a bit too much involvement in regulation than necessary- and their own personal issues are coming to the forefront. being a regulator is a hard task, as it brings up a lot of control issues, (we all have them, they are almost necessary) and they are right there for all to see. it is a brave road. i feel like i myself have run into this energy as well when i'm put in control positions. truth is sometimes hard to swallow when we see strangers or social peers saying things, personal things,that we don't want to hear.i think the lesson is to let go of the absolute and trust that people are good and that we are not always right about everything. nurture those who you oversee, even if you think what they are doing is not what you would do, and they will surprise you.
and weren't the rules set up for our own benefit? if they were, it sounds like most everyone is okay with her. so the rules were made for us, and we all agree that dfq is okay. then we're all happy. so why does she have to change? does malcolm think she is offensive? why is this about him all of a sudden, in some of your opinions? i got the impression (from others and from him)that he is really laid back and fun loving, and encourages lighthearted creativity.
he set this forum up so people could express themselves. so why can't she be herself? if you don't let her, then she will not be happy and leave, and take her socks with her. is that what you want? everyone has their own piece to contribute. for some it is to be imaginative and fun, and joke around-why contain positive childlike play? who wins?

-Such a price the gods exact for song: to become what we sing
-Seek freedom and become captive of your desires. Seek discipline and find your liberty.
-When the center of the storm does not move, you are in its path.

AnonymousPLATINUM Member

I think I should chime in too, although I'm not really a 'Social Discussion' regular

So - What you all seem to be saying is; a few components of DFQ's posting style is worth more than somebody else's Offense?

Nobody is asking DFQ to give up her personality - I would hope that there is a lot more to her personality than a few racially risky slang words. I'm also sure she knows quite well which particular terms she uses that are 'high risk'. All the mods are asking is for a very small concession on DFQ's part so that everyone can be happy. Thats all.