Forums > Social Chat > Do men know what women want from them?

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Twirly


Twirly

Shoryuken!
Location: Hexham, Newcastle, England

Total posts: 233
Posted:Pretty much that, do you think that guys, in general, have any idea what women really want from them? Do women really know what men want from a relationship? I'd really like to see this answered by both mens and womens, I think it could be an eyeopener.

If anyone has enough relevant experience to expand this beyond hetrosexual relationships, feel free.

Respect,
Davy


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coleman
SILVER Member since Aug 2002

coleman

big and good and broken
Location: lunn dunn, yoo kay, United Kin...

Total posts: 7330
Posted:Written by: Puk

I thought the most important thing was to be best mates?.



well, that's a damn good start... ubbrollsmile


"i see you at 'dis cafe.
i come to 'dis cafe quite a lot myself.
they do porridge."
- tim westwood

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Durbs
BRONZE Member since Sep 2001

Durbs

Classically British
Location: Epsom, Surrey, England

Total posts: 5688
Posted:I've tried to find a good, honest answer to this question - but it turns out the answer is - Me.

*sigh*

It's a hard life being a love-god

(How I love the Social Chat forum for all the pent-up posting that goes un-typed)

P.S. - This post is sarcastic.


P.P.S - Apart from the bit about the Love-god, I am.


P.P.P.S - No really, ask Mrs Durbs smile


Burner of Toast
Spinner of poi
Slacker of enormous magnitude

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MiG
GOLD Member since Apr 2004

MiG

Self-Flagellation Expert
Location: Bogged at CG, Australia

Total posts: 3415
Posted:what all men want? what all women want?
[cue music (x-files theme)]
the answer is out there
[/cue]

on a somewhat serious note, there is no answer to those questions. every man, and every woman is different. from the sex they want, to the number of children they want, to the sort of job they like, to how they like their coffee, to whether they want their kids to have sex with someone at work while drinking coffee. i want someone different to my best mate, and he wants someone different to my dad, who wants someone different to his best mate.

And on top of that, the someone, or, for that matter, something, i want now will change as the years, months, weeks, days maybe, go by. hypothetically speaking, if i was with a woman, it would make sense that what she wants out of me would change also. if i was to get married tomorrow to someone my age, (bearing in mind that im 18), then im guessing she'd want someone that would help her through growing up, to help her feel secure in the relationship, someone that would have fun with her, and someone to hold at the end of the day. ten years from now, i'd say that she would want someone to help make decisions in life, an equal partner in buying a house, someone that would make a good dad, someone that would go on holidays to vanuatu or wherever, someone that has good long term prospects in life. 20 years later, with both of us nearing 50 (god thats scary, it doesnt sound that long away, when you think of it like that), maybe she'd want someone that had made wise choices early in life, someone that she could depend on, someone that would give a guiding hand to her grandchildren.

Looking at it like that, i'd have to have a guess that what i wrote up there is close to what we all want. ok, some might want more, or different, some might want less, but all in all, i reckon thats a pretty good guess.

it all changes. love needs a special balance between being static and being dynamic. we need to keep adjusting our wants and expectations and what we're willing to give, while still enjoying being in love for love's sake. we need to make sure that we can see well enough into the person we love to make sure that we are delivering what they're asking. maybe we need to be able to see ourselves in the person we love, enough to see whether or not we could love the person that we are.

Being good mates, great friends, thats a huge step along the way to being in love and having a successful relationship, but i dont think anyone will find true love without being able to love the person that they are first. How can we expect another person to love us for all our faults, all our shortcomings, and all our greatnesses, if we cant love ourselves for the same things?

or maybe not. who knows? if we figured out love, we'd have it all figured, methinks. it is, as The Architecht says, an emotion designed to defeat all logical thought, or something.

*in forrest gump voice*
well, thats all i gots to say about that.


"beg beg grovel beg grovel"
"master"
--FSA

"There was an arse there, i couldn't help myself"
--Rougie

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Rouge Dragon
BRONZE Member since Jul 2003

Rouge Dragon

Insert Champagne Here
Location: without class distinction, Aus...

Total posts: 13215
Posted:*silence* MiG,...woah!

i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey

Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...

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Poi_Girl


stranger
Location: Dsseldorf, GERMANY

Total posts: 23
Posted:MiG that is exactly what it is.... Fascinatingly wise... It's always about the right time and what we want of a relationship at that stage!
Sad that you are "down under there" wink But you will definitely make a girl pretty happy smile


Trume nicht Dein Leben, lebe Deinen Traum.
- Dont dream your live, live it.

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MiG
GOLD Member since Apr 2004

MiG

Self-Flagellation Expert
Location: Bogged at CG, Australia

Total posts: 3415
Posted:see, im not a sophistimicated uni bum for nothing smile

looking back, and reading that a day after i wrote it, i think it's pretty close to what i would want out of a long term relationship.

i'd love to be in a relationship like that right now, even if it was just someone i could put my arm around and share a milkshake with. anything more than that would make me very happy indeed, but thats not the point im trying to say here. i think one of my main problems, apart from shyness, a complete inability to dance, and being perpetually worried that if i start hitting on someone then a boyfriend is going to come and give me a love tap in the teeth, is that i really dont know what i want at the moment.

and the teenage years are supposed to be the best in your life. bollox.


"beg beg grovel beg grovel"
"master"
--FSA

"There was an arse there, i couldn't help myself"
--Rougie

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GottaLoveIt


GottaLoveIt

Sponge
Location: Stevenage

Total posts: 883
Posted:Being a teenager is great! You get the label to hide behind and blame all your mistakes on... so start making some!!!! Hehe biggrin

hug


Monkeys monkeys and bananas

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Rouge Dragon
BRONZE Member since Jul 2003

Rouge Dragon

Insert Champagne Here
Location: without class distinction, Aus...

Total posts: 13215
Posted:Written by: GottaLoveIt

Being a teenager is great! You get the label to hide behind and blame all your mistakes on... so start making some!!!! Hehe biggrin



i like how you think!!!!!! ubbrollsmile

*goes off to make stupid mistakes while i have 2 years left* biggrin


i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey

Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...

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Bender_the_Offender
GOLD Member since Nov 2001

Bender_the_Offender

still can't believe it's not butter
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Total posts: 6979
Posted:What people want is what people want.
that is unchangeable dukkha nature,
so no point being jaded/cynical and not liking this thread, it is the nature things.
the positive person sees the same universe, just reacts outta love.


Laugh Often, Smile Much, Post lolcats Always

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yannicus
GOLD Member since Jul 2003

yannicus

member
Location: Paris, France, the armpit of e...

Total posts: 169
Posted:want is just a word, need is another, the line between is sometimes hazy.

who i want doesnt often want me

who wants me i dont often want

when i get what i want i dont want it anymore

my wants can turn to needs

to be wanted is nice

to be needed can be scary

i need what i want and i want what i need

and im single


-Believing that all has been said and done is like mistaking the horizon for the limits of the world. Voltaire.
-Plus je connais hommes, plus j'aime mon chien. Pascal.

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native
SILVER Member since Jun 2004

native

sleeping with angels
Location: anaheim CA usa

Total posts: 508
Posted:it is realy realy silly everyt one asumes that i want things i dont even think about just because i am a guy. i want true love and to fall asleap with somone in my arms and wake up and have them still be there. damit i want to be loved!!!!

SLEEP WITH ANGELS muckieha

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Lyra
SILVER Member since Feb 2004

spiny norman
Location: Cincinnati,damn it, USA

Total posts: 314
Posted:aww, native needs a hug(im sending you a mental kleenex)

being a teenager isent always great, sometimes people discount teenagers feelings and ideas as not being "real" or as being the creation of "teenage hormones", bullshit!

not all teenagers are the irrational, underachieving, hormonal people the stereotype would have you believe they are

deep down everyone just wants to be loved

peace/fire
lyra


if you think that our kiss was all in the lips, come on you got it all wrong man, and if you think that our dance was all in the hips then, oh well, do the twist -The White Stripes

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BurningByron


member
Location: Australia

Total posts: 340
Posted:I think being happy without a romantic partner is the most important thing.

HOW TO FLY 101:
step 1. Throw your self at the ground.
step 2. Miss.

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Silvur
BRONZE Member since Sep 2003

Silvur

sumthin sumin smmnm....
Location: home sweet home, USA

Total posts: 372
Posted:here are my thoughts on love:

i think that it's not the ppl that fall in love; it's their souls

i think that love and trust run hand in hand, and that if you can't trust someone, then don't even think about it.

i think that you CAN fall for your best friend without even realising it, and that you can just as easily brush it aside because it isn't the stereotypical "falling for someone" that we're brought up by society to believe.

i think that love, when allowed, will stop at nothing.

i think that love follows no course of logic or rationale, because it is an emotion.

i think that love is an action word.

i think that without love, we lose a peice of ourselves, and when we fall in love, we find that little peice inside of us that we thought we had lost

anyways, they're just thoughts, but damn good ones if i do say so myself!!

hug kiss hug


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