Forums > Social Discussion > Anxiety and Depression: Does it truly ever go away

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KajiQuantum Theorist
564 posts
Location: Vansterdam


Posted:
Anxiety and Depression:

Does it really get better

or

Do you just learn to pretend everything is ok when it's not.

Ok I posted this question in either/or but I feel like it needs serious discussion right now. As you may or may not know I suffer from anxiety and depression as does my girlfriend. Since about Febuary I have been going in an up and down cycle of depression and anxiety with only brief days when i feel good. Those cycles are getting longer with less and less good days. I'm begining to think that I'll never get better. That I'll always be this way. That all you can really do is pretend every thing is ok, whether it is or not.

What do you think?

In the 60's people took acid to make the world weird, now the world is weird and they take prozac to make it normal again.


KatchGOLD Member
Beach bum
162 posts
Location: Singapore


Posted:
Reading this thread has brought a bit of comfort. I was recently diagnosed as being bipolar. For the most part, I do feel somewhat lucky. I can get the high without smoking anything illegal, and I'm most productive at that stage. wink. But that's a bit hard to remember when everything seems to be going the wrong way. There are still days when I feel the world doesn't really need me and i'm better off dead. Or I get paranoid and lash out at people who care...



My doctor once asked me to describe what I was like when I was manic, and what I was like when I was depressed... and then he asked me what "normal" for me was like and for the life of me I couldn't describe it to him because I couldn't remember. So he's started me on epival and the condition I set was to take it only until moods stabilized, and I learned what normal limits were. Not too keen to be dependent on anything.



Parents are a bit skeptical but support my visits to both kinds of doctors. They're worried about the social stigma attached with having a mental disorder. We don't seem to have support groups here to us deal with it, and people don't really say anything. Even my psychologist (who diagonosed me) says its just a small thing and it'll pass...



I'm hoping with the meds, I won't be so angry anymore, or cry without a reason... but I'm afraid may never laugh as much either or revel in the thought that for brief moment, the world makes sense. I don't know... Whats it like? How do you cope? Is it worth giving up the the sheer bliss of a manic high to smoothen out the devastating feeling of depression?

Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
-Franklin P. Jones


Kansasnewbie
17 posts
Location: Topeka, KS


Posted:
Katch I am so sorry to hear that you have been diagnosed bipolar. My hubby has been bipolar for a few years now and some days are harder than others. Things never get normal but then again what is normal?? Don't worry when you are on the meds and stabelized things are good and trust in this. Just don't try what he did and stop taking them because he thought he was better. lol =) oh if you are mixing those types of meds make sure all your docs know that what you are taking.... the mixing can cause kiddney problems and other heart problems. Hope everything goes better for you!!

The Sky's the limit...
I trying to go futher...
KaNsAs


GothFrogetteBRONZE Member
grumpy poorly froggy
3,999 posts
Location: Nuneaton, United Kingdom


Posted:
Katch huge hugs hug hug and snap only i don't and will not take meds. been there done that and well they didn't work for me. they do work for others though. I have a big thing Against meds but thats just my personal opinion but as i said before if you feel they are right for you give them ago, or maybe ask your doc if there are any 'alternative' ways of treating it. Exercise helps but i find i only want to do that when i'm manic.

As for the stigma attatched to having a mental disorder..... stigma's will only go away when people stopped being scared of the phrase "Mental ilness" its nothing to be ashamed of, or hide. its part of who you are and if people want to jump to jump to conclusions like so many do about this type of illness without actually reading up on what it is,then that is their problem and not yours. there is plenty of information out there on the subject and infact it could help your parents understand a little too.

https://www.emental-health.com/bipolar.asp
https://www.anxietypanic.com/bipolar.html
and my fave site just because Spike Milligan was a patron https://www.geocities.com/HotSprings/Spa/6101/page1.html

hug

Life's too short to worry about where you put your marshmallows


mycoBRONZE Member
Pooh-Bah
2,084 posts
Location: melbourne, victoria, australia


Posted:
bump...i feel like i'm getting depressed again, and i'm so f***ing scared. i have people who i can talk to about it, but i just hate feeling like i'm burdening them or seeking sympathy. It's likely that this is just going to be a brief period of feeling down, but it feels almost unbearable sometimes, and it feels like it's forever.

GothFrogetteBRONZE Member
grumpy poorly froggy
3,999 posts
Location: Nuneaton, United Kingdom


Posted:
hug i wish i could say something to help cheer you up.
I get what your saying though about sounding as though your out for sympathy, i feel thats what people think all the time if they ask me whats up. but am used to just saying "I have Manic depression" they usualy just stay quiet. i don't do it in a mean way. but i hate me and there is nothing worse than trying to expalin why to people without wandering if they think your just fishing for compliments

anyway hug hug hug and your not alone kiss

Life's too short to worry about where you put your marshmallows


KatchGOLD Member
Beach bum
162 posts
Location: Singapore


Posted:
hug At least you know it's coming, and can take preventive measures. Just think of moments when you've been truly happy and remember that this too shall pass. After that, do a bit of charity work. Nothing gets me feeling better faster than helping other people with bigger problems.

At any rate, you're not alone and if you do need to talk to someone (which really helps!), we are here. hug

Experience is that marvelous thing that enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
-Franklin P. Jones


Psycho_lemmingSILVER Member
Running hippy spinning lemming
15 posts
Location: Scotland


Posted:

....hug much understanding and support hug ......

know too well
x

Fear leads to anger; anger leads to hate; hate leads to suffering...


MynciBRONZE Member
Macaque of all trades
8,738 posts
Location: wombling free..., United Kingdom


Posted:
Have to say was diagnosed as having depressive disorder july 2004 and still having effects now. however Have come to terms by releasing my angry me...can be a little scary but decided to do things for me and stop making everyone else happy for a while.
Huge paranoia but decided until it actually happens why worry..just gonna do my own head in...
Gave up the doctors drugs and felt better. started to juggle more. as found juggling a great de-stresser (was the original symptom of my disorder all i did for 2 weeks was juggle couldn't do anything else as juggling cleared my mind)
But overall feel as though am the same person I was then just know how to deal with all the crap feelings.
hug hug hug
To every one biggrin

A couple of balls short of a full cascade... or maybe a few cards short of a deck... we'll see how this all fans out.


GothFrogetteBRONZE Member
grumpy poorly froggy
3,999 posts
Location: Nuneaton, United Kingdom


Posted:
Am currently going through DBT so am hoping it helps. has anyone else been through it?

Life's too short to worry about where you put your marshmallows


jo_rhymesSILVER Member
Momma Bear
4,525 posts
Location: Telford, Shrops, United Kingdom


Posted:
happiness can be found in even the darkest times if one only remembers to turn on the light ...Albus Dumbledore!

Hoppers are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly.


jemima (jem)SILVER Member
Pooh-Bah
1,750 posts
Location: london, United Kingdom


Posted:
Did anyone see a programe on about selective mustim



It reminded me of myself, but not quite so extreme. I still clam up to this day in certain situations. Bah I wish i had seen this before i did an illustration project on shyness and anxiety rolleyes



And quiet people are always loverly people ubbangel



"Above average intelligence, perception, or are inquisitive

Are sensitive to others' thoughts and feelings (empathy)

Have very good powers of concentration (focused)

Often have a good sense of right/wrong/fairness (justice) "





clicky




EDITED_BY: jemima (jem) (1144716298)

Never assume
Always Acknowledge


nordemember
39 posts
Location: Bangor, Norn Iron


Posted:
wow....... another great thread here with many kind words

i have suffered myself off and on since i was about 30 (38 next month eeeek), did the various meds off and on for best part of 4 years shrug then my outlook changed somewhat after a bad accident left me in a wheelchair for best part of a year.
this combined with lying in a hospital bed for 5 weeks and looking at elderly people without their facilities made me see things in a different light.... life is short and precious - i try not to let issues bother me the same as they did before, but i find this is sometimes easier said than done.

i dunno if it will ever leave me completely, its just someomething i've learnt to deal/live with.

its always nice to know there are so many understanding people out there grouphug

Love me when i least deserve it... cause that is when i need it the most


ickleMattenthusiast
242 posts
Location: L.O.N.D.O.N.


Posted:
Can I suggest a book:

The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

He suffered a lot from depression. Its a pretty power book and I cried twice from reading it (and not cause I was sad).

If you do pick it up let me know what you think of it.

In the mean time think of all the people who care for you, and you care for. This always makes me feel a lot better.
smile

MeenikSAPPHIRE Member
enthusiast
272 posts
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada


Posted:
I read The Power Of Now when I was in India, depressed about being broke and unable to support the vision I was trying to bring to life... or, that's what I was spending my time thinking about, anyway. It's always hard to say which things are triggering depression, and which are just the things that the depression uses for its own purposes.

Anyway, at the time it was very inspiring, but in the long run, I'm not sure what it left me.

It's certainly an interesting book, and although I had expected it to be flaky, at the time I couldn't find anything flaky about it.

Depression depression depression...

Interesting to see this thread here.

I'll be back (in thick german accent)
n

"They're interdimensional fractal intelligences. That's why they wear funny shoes."


_Clare_BRONZE Member
Still wiggling
5,967 posts
Location: Belfast, Northern Ireland (UK)


Posted:
hug

Hello Nick!!!

Hope you're well m'lovely

biggrin

Getting to the other side smile


daizeSILVER Member
member
175 posts
Location: Falmouth, Cornwall, England (UK)


Posted:
It's all been pretty much said by everyone else.



But I'll have a go at summing it up from personal experience (for both anxiety and depression)....



I can't stress the following enough:



Healthy body-healthy mind, healthy mind-healthy body...



-LOOK AFTER YOUR BODY; water! diet! excercise! routine! hobbies.



-LOOK AFTER YOUR MIND; think positive (cognitive therapy), smile, routine, hobbies + stress relievers (meditation, yogay, tai chi, poi, bird watchin, walks, paitning etc... the list is endless)



If you ever consider medication, always opt for homeopathic remedies... from experience perscription drugs tend to cause more problems than they're worth. That is unless you're clinically depressed, then you need to speak to a trained psychiatrist/psychologist.



And finally smile, even if it's false... fake smiles will eventually turn into real ones, and they also create the same chemical reaction in the brain as real ones.



you need to want to make the change, and be dedicated to it. Tame that beast!! smile



PM me if you ever want to talk!

faith enfireBRONZE Member
wandering thru the woods of WI
3,556 posts
Location: Wisconsin, USA


Posted:
i just want to say that prescription pills do help...i was at my wits end two years ago...it was hit and miss but we found something that worked while i grew strong enough to deal with this on my own
the stigma is gone, do not be afraid to ask for help, you yourself is more important than how others see you, anyways,
BPD and MD and clinical depression is nothing to fool around with, it can turn very serious very quickly

Faith
Nay, whatever comes one hour was sunlit and the most high gods may not make boast of any better thing than to have watched that hour as it passed


GothFrogetteBRONZE Member
grumpy poorly froggy
3,999 posts
Location: Nuneaton, United Kingdom


Posted:
they can help but not for every one

Life's too short to worry about where you put your marshmallows


pop_n_freshmember
48 posts
Location: Scotland


Posted:
i suffered from depression, anxiety, post traumatic stress, extreme paranoia and agrophobia for around 8 years, which is half my life. and now im ok. i still can drop into any combination of them but it is very rare, i am still recovering and still have far to go, but just now im only depressed about a quarter of the time. which is a vast improvement on before. all the treatment i have had is psychology. and i had to build up alot of trust with her.

i am getting over this, and through various help groups i have met alot of people who have. i dunno if it will ever just dissapeare, it might come back for a few months when i am 60 or something like that. but my life is enjoyable now, i have found a role and i have alot of good friends who i hold close. for about a year my life had gone from being intolerable to kind of bareable, and now enjoyable. so there is light at the end ot the tunnel.

just talk to a psychologist and if they arent working for you ask to change, they wont be offended, i went through three before i found one that i realy connected with, and thats a realy important thing.

good luck with it.

-:pop

Just call me Pop.


daizeSILVER Member
member
175 posts
Location: Falmouth, Cornwall, England (UK)


Posted:
I agree, drugs help many people...



From my own experience (having been on them myself, and watching my mother on them) it's not something that should be considered lightly.



I myself had adverse affects from them, and they severed the conditions of my anxiety.



Only recently my doctor suggested that I should go on some more treatment, when I declined and explained the aderse affects from them, he told me that they had discontinued perscribing that particular drug to people of that age. Because of the reported problems, similar to mine.



So I tend not to trust modern medicines, and have brought about a lifestyle change, and use herbal remedies.



Don't forget to smile biggrin

pop_n_freshmember
48 posts
Location: Scotland


Posted:
herbal remedies help, alot. my mum is a herbalist. its all gravy. and sometimes meds can worsen you if you have been diagnosed as depressed but are actualy bipolar.

Just call me Pop.


RayinRedSILVER Member
member
39 posts
Location: Huntington, New York, USA


Posted:
I've suffered from depression on and off for a couple of years now. It took awhile, but with medication, therapy, spirtuality and exercise, I've been able to get more centered. I do still have flare ups, as do others people I know who suffer from depression. Using support from the people around me has also helped.

Good luck with your struggels, it does get better if you seek help.

MeenikSAPPHIRE Member
enthusiast
272 posts
Location: Vancouver, BC, Canada


Posted:
Went through some blues this winter, down on Koh Phangan Island in thailand no less! smile

The good thing was that I had all the time in the world to work on my mind. I think I finally figured out some good practices.

The big summary: It's really about the mind. Yoga and keeping the body fit is very important of course, but it all stars with the mind.

I took on the attitude that I can straighten my mind/thoughts the way I can straighten my planes... and after a few months of practice (a couple hours a day working with thoughts and affirmations) I'm really seeing some amazing things happening.

I even made my most recent video about it: The Beautiful thing about Ashes.

I don't think I'm "Cured Forever" or anything like that, but it really feels like I've finally figured out the place to really start from, the foundation, so to speak. At least, for now.

I'll report later when I've done more lab tests ubbrollsmile ubbrollsmile ubbrollsmile


Meanwhile, it's fun to have fun! Try it! biggrin ubbloco ubbloco juggle weavesmiley biggrin

"They're interdimensional fractal intelligences. That's why they wear funny shoes."


Gnarly CraniumSILVER Member
member
186 posts
Location: San Francisco, USA


Posted:
Wow. Actually, I just went in to sign up for some therapy appointments myself today, it's started to really freak me out just how long a person can spend miserable, with nothing getting better...

Thanks, Nick. I still have your book, too... it still amazes and warms me, that someone is so willing to let what's under the surface show. There's too little truth in the world.

And honestly, dood. It's weird and backwards, how such cool people could manage to be sad-- although I understand how the finances can be, being broke SUCKS-- but... holy geez. If YOU can't cheer up, there's something wrong with the world. Not you, just... the universe. So.. Thailand needs to keep up with the cheering up-ness. Seriously.

Moley. That thing you do with varying the speed of the poi is... okay I'm just going to sit here and dribble a while. Oh and, cool pants.

"Ours is not to question The Head; it is enough to revel in the ubiquitous inanity of The Head, the unwanted proximity of The Head, the unrelenting HellPresence of The Head, indeed the very UNYIELDING IRRELEVANCE of The Head!" --Revelation X


Sparklygreenfire*Green Spirit*
201 posts
Location: Southampton, England


Posted:
I've been suffering from depression since I was 16. Everytime it would effect me I'd take medication, I'd tried counsilling but it hadn't really helped...they reckon it's a chemical imbalance. I've been going steadily downhill again more recently. The last 6 months or so have been very stressfull, and my mind has been working overtime worrying about stuff. This month though for the first time I'm feeling better. I'm not great but I'm getting there. There seems to be an air of negativity surrounding me much of the time but I know things will be okay.
I tell myself everyday that I'm gonna be fine, I sometimes even shout it...it helps so much cos it gets your mind thinking that way! I've also been trying hard to think positively...whereas before I would dwell on the negative and all the positive things would just get buried!!
For the first time ever I've said no to medication. I know that will help and usually it's instant with the ones I take....but there's so many side effects too. I get severe jitters, lik I've done way too much caffeine or speed, and I can't sleep for weeks. Which in my opinion doesn't help your mood anyway!! I've started taking st johns wort last week...apparently it's a gradual thing. I haven't felt any side effects so I'm gonna keep at it and see what happens. I'm also taking oil of eve primrose...which is good for balancing out hormones (My periods have also suffered severly).
So yeah, there is hope for ppl with depression...
I agree with everyone who has mention healthy living...can't stress that enough!!!

biggrin

Are you a robot...or an alien?


polaritySILVER Member
veteran
1,228 posts
Location: on the wrong planet, United Kingdom


Posted:
It's that time of year again, when it's gone all dark and cold and miserable.

I should be happy now that I've got a place of my own, but the nice big rooms just mean big heating bills to be at a comfortable temperature, so it's always cold, and I don't feel like doing anything.

I've been really good at getting my head together and filling out all the forms for bills, just got to venture out and find the nearest post box and it's sorted. Housing benefit has been a huge mess though. I've been here a month, rent is due today, and I've found out my forms were sent to the county I moved out of, because they had my old address on the cover (where I live(ed), because I wanted correspondence sent to the place I was living at the time, including the return of my passport and NI card, needed for other things), and no-one bothered to read inside where the address for the place I moved into is written. If I didn't have my parents as guarantors and to cover the rent I'd never be able to afford the ~£2000 needed to get through the first few months.

So at the moment I'm just feeling numb. Cold and fed up with forms and not really caring, just wanting to go to sleep or ignore everything. There's no anxiety because I don't see anything in the future, distant or otherwise besides boredom.

I feel that the half empty glass at least has the potential to be refilled, but that can wait. For now I just want to hibernate. £8.50 Cold Weather Payments every month should help, but that's just more paperwork.

You aren't thinking or really existing unless you're willing to risk even your own sanity in the judgment of your existence.

Green peppers, lime pickle and whole-grain mustard = best sandwich filling.


animatEdBRONZE Member
1 + 1 = 3
3,540 posts
Location: Bristol UK


Posted:
I just got back from the Doctor.



They're referring me to a psychologist.



I've requested zero medication. They offered me a psychiatrist, but I turned that down due to previous experiences.



Trouble is, Psychologist = a while of waiting. Oh well, I've been living like this for years, a few extra months on my own won't hurt.



But I see some good sides to this. Some REALLY good sides.



I blame it for me achieving some skill at things like contact juggling, dancing, and music. It's made me more aware of many things. It's given me good memory, and good logical thinking. Price I have to pay for these things is an unhealthy obsession with straight lines, symmetry and perfection. Of course, not forgetting the endless (unnecessary) worry, and panic attacks...



But hey, many great people have/had the same as me. I believe it to be the driving force behind many great artists, and athletes.



So, yeah... Here goes...

Empty your mind. Be formless, Shapeless, like Water.
Put Water into a cup, it becomes the cup, put water into a bottle, it becomes the bottle, put water into a teapot, it becomes the teapot.
Water can flow, or it can Crash.
Be Water My Friend.


polaritySILVER Member
veteran
1,228 posts
Location: on the wrong planet, United Kingdom


Posted:
 Written by:

I blame it for me achieving some skill at things like contact juggling, dancing, and music.



Some skill? Don't downplay what you've got. A style of your own, and real innovation.


Me, I'm taking herbal remedies. Gotu Kola for anxiety, and Panax Ginseng for concentration. I became much more ADD than OCD after anti-depressants, although I still do odd things like lining up the air vents in a car.


Anyway, I've got housing benefit back on the move, and I'm going outdoors to see what the common in front of my flat is like.

You aren't thinking or really existing unless you're willing to risk even your own sanity in the judgment of your existence.

Green peppers, lime pickle and whole-grain mustard = best sandwich filling.


MikeGinnyGOLD Member
HOP Mad Doctor
13,925 posts
Location: San Francisco, CA, USA


Posted:
 Written by: Look_This_Changes


I think I have OCD.




There are two obsessive-compulsive disorders.

The first is classic obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). This usually focuses itself around a few specific rituals or rules (not stepping on cracks, repeated hand-washing, not touching doorknobs, walking through doors 'the right way', stopping the car every time you hit a bump to make sure [five or twenty times] that it wasn't a body, etc.). I used to wonder if I had OCD because of all the hand-washing.

But seeing as how I wash my hands only 5-10 times per day when I am not at work, I quickly ruled that out.

Then there's OCPD. That's obsessive-compulsive personality disorder. In OCPD the disorder is more pervasive. This is the guy who always is late because he's checking the house over 3-4 times to make sure all the windows and doors are locked and the stove and coffee maker are off. Or the woman who spends so much time straightening her desk that she never gets any work done. It affects multiple aspects of life, rather than just a few rituals, and because the obsessions and compulsions aren't usually as intense it often isn't recognized as quickly because it isn't as completely disabling as pure OCD.

I don't know why I felt it necessary to spout that out.

-Mike

Certified Mad Doctor and HoP High Priest of Nutella



A buckuht n a hooze! -Valura


PinkNigelPinker than thou
336 posts
Location: A little pink world all my own..


Posted:
 Written by: Doc Lightning


I don't know why I felt it necessary to spout that out.



Because it's helpful. Thank you.
I have a very close friend who classifies herself as OCD. From your description, it appears that she's really OCPD. Since she's into self-help in a big way as far as that's concerned, knowing the difference could well be a lot of help.

(Back on thread-title-topic)
From my own standpoint, I went onto the happy pills during my rather nasty divorce, stopped taking them when it was over and I was at Bristol juggling convention (such is the power of Brizzle...). No, it never goes away completely, at least not in my experience. It's always within reach if you let it be. BUT... As has already been stated, be healthy, eat good, have physical fun. A pragmatic approach to stress and worry is good for you too.. vis. I could expend energy on worrying about the possibility of x. OR... I could expend that same energy on ensuring x doesn't happen. Worrying is negative and unproductive, and as such, a waste of those energies. Making x not happen _may_ be unnecessary (cos x was never going to happen anyway, whatever your head said), but if it was going to happen, the energy was well spent preventing it. And when you get into the practise, prevention takes much less energy than worry...

A wise man once said: "You have two ears and one mouth, therefore you should shut the censored up and listen" (though, to be fair, he might not've put it _quite_ like that..)


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