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Naganootch
AKA CLERIC
Location: Staten Island , NY. USA
Member Since: 30th Aug 2001
Total posts: 172
Posted:Can anyone actually say they are happy wth their lives? We always sit there and think everyone else has it better. But do they? If we knew those people and there problems would we actually then think they have it better? For all we know their life is as fucked up in their eyes as ours is to us.Everyday is a torture test in some way. It's been so long sice i've been happy for a week straight. If life isn't ment to be happy whats the point. Even the famous people who have millions of dollars aren't happy. It's depressing that a person can't even be happy when they have millions of people who adore them, and see what that person can't see in themselves. This applys to everyone though. It takes so little for me to be happy, and yet i can't get it. I continually put more high mountains to climb between me and happiness. In talking to people my life isn't as fucked as others. I have a normal home life. I have freinds. I have people who love me for who I am. so why aren't I happy?Pain is always there,It's all i feel.everyday you remind memaking sure, i know it's real.Like a butterfly ,flying into the wind.It's a pointless fight that i can not win.My bodies gone numbI don't know my placewill you grace me with your shinning lightso i can find my way home.my heart is goneyou've left me deadall i hear are those wordsrepeated in my headwhats the motivationof living this cruel existenceit's begining to seemless of a joy and more of a nuissanceMy bodies gone numbI don't know my placewill you grace me with your shinning lightso i can find my way home.no direction.motivation gone.no purpose.just leave me alone.

We are defined by the choices we make

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Cassandra
Cassandra

Froggie ... Ribbit !!!
Location: Back in Paris... for now !
Member Since: 8th Jun 2001
Total posts: 4224
Posted:Naganootch you just sound so down ... So first of all here is a biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiig hug and smile for you
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I think it takes a certain skill to allow oneself to be happy ... to quote mandela again ...Our deepest fear is not that we are too weak. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful in a way we cannot even imagine. It is the light inside us not the darkness that frightens us the most.We ask ourselves what right do I have to be brilliant, beautiful, talented and loveable?As a matter of fact, what right do you have not to be?There is nothing enlightened in putting yourself down so that other people would not feel insecure. The more we let ourselves shine, we give, without noticing it, the right for others to do the same. The more we get free from our fears, our presence will free others from fear.I have never been happy one week straight... happiness is about all those happy seconds, minutes ... and making these moments last enough to make you feel warm inside... I am never happy if I think of huge concepts like "love", life family ... but a smile on the street honestly can make my day ... it is good to expect a lot and challenge oneself... and sometimes it is just good to give yourself a break and be silly and laugh at stupid things and be happy like a kid ...don't know if I make sense ... so again : smiles an dsunshine to youSHINE ONCassandra


"I want brown bread... no, that is diesel oil..."
"So I was raised in Europe, where History comes from ..."
"NON !!! La Plume de mon oncle n est pas Bingibangibungi !!!"

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DJ Dantana
veteran
Location: Stillwater, Ok. USA
Member Since: 15th Aug 2001
Total posts: 1495
Posted:I feel your pain. I have actually been depresses a lot in my life. I find that I am usually depressed when I am alone, but when I am with my close friends I tend to forget about my sadness. That is what keeps me going, being with the people who make me forget about my worries, and loneliness. I think mostly my depression has stemmed from not having a woman. But even when I do, it always seems like there are still occations when I get my feelings hurt, maybe I am to sensitive. I don't know, but I can't change my nature. Wise man say:"life is not fair""pleasure past is converted to pain""all things change, and even sadness can become joy"you may be sad right now, but you will feel joy again. Maybe it is good to experience pain, maybe it builds strength, maybe it helps us to realize when we do have it good.But remember, just when you think you got it bad, there is some dude in africa who has to sleep on the ground, dodge bullets, and there isn't even food in a dumpster to eat...maybe we just haven't truely experienced what it is like, so we don't realize just how happy we should be. I have contemplated true happiness, and the meaning of life....many times.What difference is my life going to make in the world after I am gone? Why am I here? how do you find ultimate happiness? "add infinitum questions..."As close as I can get to the answer is....1. Have someone to hold you and love you and make love to you and cuddle with and listen to you and care for you and hold you when you are feeling blue.2. Have babies, I think there is something very integral in our nature that demands that we reproduce and untill we do there is something missing in our lives. Untill your baby has fallen asleep in your arms, you have not experienced true peace.3. do things that you haven't done befor, stagnation is death, life is change. 4. Peace and love to all. Give love freely, and accept it as well.

we eat and we drink and we smoke and we try!

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NYC
NYC

NYC
Location: NYC, NY, USA
Member Since: 26th Aug 2001
Total posts: 9232
Posted:Actually I love my life, yeah, I'm pretty happy with it.Is it tiring and Busy? Yes. Sucky parts? Yes. Good parts? Absolutely.Keep it simple, do things to make life better, take care of yourself, take care of those you love. And avoid, whenever possible, the sucky things that bring you down.And I'm not just giggly cuz I'm in love (granted it's a part of it..) but ever since I moved out the house when I was 18 (to go off to college) life's been pretty good. I live by my rules, make some money, spend some money, make some friends, lose some friends, have a relatively plesant time by myself, have a relatively plesant time with others.I think the hardest part is figuring out what one WANTS that is tangible and would make life better. Once you figure that out, getting it is easy.

Well, shall we go?
Yes, let's go.
[They do not move.]

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Dom
Dom

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Bristol, UK
Member Since: 19th Dec 2001
Total posts: 3009
Posted:This board is full of very cool people with good stuff to say.I think I can safely say that probably nobody on the planet is happy for a whole week straight.Happiness is relative. If you think happiness is having an infinite amount of money and a million amazing friends then it isn't ever going to happen. In our western world we're constantly told that to be happy we have to be like celebrities or drive the latest convertable and have a blonde on your arm. This is a load of rubbish! In other parts of the world people are happy just because they could eat today for the first time in a week.I'm single, I have troubles, I'm slightly paranoid, I'm currently working too much and I have the ever-present money problems. And I'm happy. Life is good, in fact it's great! I get a little depressed and upset quite often, but on average I'm happy with my life. It could always be better, but I'm happy where I am right here, right now.I think happiness with your own situation is something that comes with life experience. At some stage you realise that success is measured in how much you take from life, because success and happiness are not going to be handed to you on a plate. You live your life, you do good by yourself and those around you and you change the world in a very special way.What would make you happy? Perhaps looking to answer this question will help you tackle your depression.If you're chemically/mentally inclined to be depressed then it may be worth taking 5 HTP regularly, don't take any mind altering substances and try working out regularly. Speaking to a doctor/therapist is far too often overlooked I could also take the true Brit line and say: Chin up old boy! No point sulking about, worse things happen at sea you know!

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tallicaburton
member
Location: Troy, NY for school (Austin, T...
Member Since: 23rd Nov 2001
Total posts: 51
Posted:Hey Naganootch. I have major issues with depression as well. I have no right to be upset or sad, when I see my friends. Her parents are getting divorced, her dog died and the rest of her family got in a car accident! And I am sad! I have lots of friends, but I always feel left out. An outsider. I feel like i have to pretend to be happy. I'm getting better. I realize I do have some issues. It's okay to be sad sometimes, but when i think about how LUCKY I am, how EXTREMELY LUCKY I am, it gets better. Just hang in there. Cass, i agree with you, a smile on the street makes my day. I wave to everyone when I'm in the car, and smile to people on the streets, just hoping I can give them a little light. I'm sending you some light right now, so hang in there. Life hurts, but even walking outside can be beautifully breathtaking. Good luck climbing out of the pit. Peace! -john

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Wren
member
Location: Mt. Horeb, Wi, USA
Member Since: 28th Oct 2001
Total posts: 33
Posted:Interesting that this shows up exactly 2 years after I reached my lowest point.I'm actually incredibly happy. I really don't have any great reason to feel this way, but for the past 9 months I've been giddy off and on. It actually sorta makes me feel guilty feeling so good when I see other people struggling.I can't, unfortunately, give you any solid advice. Do silly things (there's a thread on this somewhere) often, and learn to extract great pleasure from them.You could always have shock therapy
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-------------------Wren"And that, my friends, is condensed evil."


-WrenAnd that, my friends, is condensed evil.

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Rozi
100 characters max...
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Member Since: 11th Jan 2002
Total posts: 2996
Posted:Depression is difficult (understatement of the year). I went through a bad patch, a few years back in high school. The previous year my dad had lost his job in the recession, and was having difficulty finding a new one, and a beloved grandparent had passed away, I also had major friend troubles, the sort only teenage girls seem to manage. That year I was very strong, and powered on through. The next year things picked up, dad got a new job, friends seemed more stable and sane. Until an incident happened which made everything in the friendship stakes seem to go backwards. & I really lost it. I didn't have anyone else I had to be strong for anymore. I had also had a taste of happiness, and to go back was like being returned to prison. The biggest problem was that I couldn't leave the thought of my unhappiness alone. I kept on picking at it. It became a block that stopped me feeling other emotions. It all came good and I am a partially sane normal person once more. But I was lucky.Since that time I have been happy & unhappy, in love and out of it, angry and a peacemaker, frustrated and philosophical. & it is exhilarating to be each of these things, & to know that as long as I don't pick at it, each negative thought has its time, and will fade.R.

It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.

What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...

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bender
still can't believe it's not butter
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Member Since: 14th Nov 2001
Total posts: 6979
Posted:Sad to hear, Naganootch - Do more stuff that you love that cheers you up is the first thing i'd say. Twirl a rubber chicken staff! Then you'll be fitter, healthier, more productive! No alarms and no surprises! Then everything's in it's right place!------------------"Every experience carries its lesson"-Muad'Dib

Laugh Often, Smile Much, Post lolcats Always

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bender
still can't believe it's not butter
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Member Since: 14th Nov 2001
Total posts: 6979
Posted:damn Rosi just beat me to it!hey naganootch, once i was glum and went to a rave where i hugged everything that moved. t'was the best therapy!

Laugh Often, Smile Much, Post lolcats Always

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The Welcome Matt
member
Location: Manchester NH USA
Member Since: 27th Nov 2001
Total posts: 193
Posted:Oh I know exactly what you mean. If you feel that you wake up every day depressed with little to smile about you get that checked out. There is something called clinical depression that just really sucks. Depresion doesn't always come from just misfortunes in your life. These can just add the pressure and getting rid of them doesn't make you feel better at all.I was horribly depressed for like 6 months in my last year of high school. I just thought that life was just pushing me down until I realized that I needed to talk to someone. For lots of people just talking to someone can make you feel better, and it can give you a ton of confidence to work out the problems that are bringing you down. There is nothing in the world that is more aleviating than the weight of depression just being lifted off your shoulders. Today it takes a huge force to piss me off or to make me depressed. I look at everything so differently and I take nothing for granted, even happiness. Always, look for help. Your not alone... there is still some good in the world
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Good LuckMATTPS- **I agree with the post above this one. There are a lot of really great, down to earth, people at raves. And its not because of drugs that makes them so happy. Its because of the unity and respect between people.------------------I dreamt that I ate a 10 pound marshmellow and then when I woke up, my pillow was gone![This message has been edited by The Welcome Matt (edited 14 March 2002).]


I dreamt that I ate a 10 pound marshmellow and then when I woke up, my pillow was gone!

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Bendy
member
Location: Adelaide, SA, Australia
Member Since: 29th Aug 2001
Total posts: 750
Posted:I'm happy - and I have been happy for months on end at times. Sure bad stuff happens and it gets me down, but overall I am still happy and love my life.Guess I am lucky
Non-Https Image Link


Courage is the man who can stop after only one peanut

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Naganootch
AKA CLERIC
Location: Staten Island , NY. USA
Member Since: 30th Aug 2001
Total posts: 172
Posted:all this crap would be O so much easier if the weather was warmer and i could just go outside and spin for a few hours. Haven't done my poi meditation since Sept, kinda itchin to do it again.I just gotta say, you people all kick ass.Anyone who actually responded to this post i bet if i met you in real life(even with out the poi connection) we'd become freinds.Thank you.

We are defined by the choices we make

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Firefairy
member
Location: UK
Member Since: 12th Oct 2001
Total posts: 115
Posted:Sorry to hear life is dragging you down at the moment.I know its sounds weird but try smiling. If you smile, even when you feel like shit, your body feels the happiness that a smile brings when you are actually happy. Maybe you need to do some work within yourslef - try meditation and deep breathing. To be truly happy you have to love yourself. It took me years - and is a life long path - but it gets easier if you can face yourself.I rolled my van and now I live my life from moment to moment and thank everything for being in my life - I even thank my car for getting me to a destination!!. Nature is amazing and its good to walk the blues off, and feel one with the world, your never alone when you feel this link.Blessed be.

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