Deimos
Deimos

Cinnamon Girl
Location: Hfx, NS, Canada
Member Since: 22nd Aug 2003
Total posts: 191
Posted:Hey all, I need a bit of advice and since is the best place I can think of where bunches of people spend all of their time *cough* I figured this would be the best way to get lots of opinions.
I am extremly unhappy at my current school. I'm abused physically and mentally and harrased for being so different from the grand majority. I have the opportunity to leave my school and attend a private school which, from what I've seen, is my dream school.
The only problem with private school is that it costs bunches of money and if I go there then I don't get any help from my parents for university. So I ask you, HOP, what do you think is more important? A fantastic HighSchool or a university degree?


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_Aime_
_Aime_

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Hastings
Member Since: 2nd Jan 2004
Total posts: 4172
Posted:Sounds like u are in a bit of a dilemma!. By the sounds of it ur about the same age as me. I can totally realte to ur problem, only i didn't even have the chance to move schools. Are you bullied because ur cleverer than them? or is it something diff? I would seriously consider moving schools, you wouldn't nessesseraly have to go to a private school? I dunno what there like in canada, but private schools here are snobby, and if there the same as over here, are you sure you would fit in a private school. seeing as most of them kids (sorry if i offend ne1) were born with silver spoons stuck up there arseholes. The people who bully you are wrong to do so, have you spoken to counselers or teachers at ur school? Surely if these people are making ur life hell at school the teachers can do something about it. especially if they are phyically hurting you. Keep a diary of ALL the things that they have said and done to you, and take pictures of any visiable wounds that they have given you. I know it sounds drastic, but if they are beating you, it is a criminal offence. hope thsi has helped. hope it gets sorted out soon *hugs* Aimz xx

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pounce
pounce

All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all a...
Member Since: 10th Jan 2003
Total posts: 9831
Posted:how much longer do you have in high school? is it short enough time that you could wait it out? otherwise you can always apply for scholarships and financial aid for university.

I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

**giggles**

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spritie
spritie

Pooh-Bah
Location: Galveston, TX
Member Since: 9th Sep 2001
Total posts: 2014
Posted:I definitely think a university degree would win out over a fantastic high school.

However, I agree with pounce, why can't you have both? There are thousands of scholarship opportunities out there as well as student loans and federal grants. I know I couldn't have gotten the degree I did without them. Not all look for good grades either - several are based on your extra-cirricular activities and volunteer work.


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flash fire
flash fire

Sporadically Prodigal
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Member Since: 25th Jan 2001
Total posts: 2758
Posted:hmmmm... sorry to hear about your troubles.

I personally think that a healthy learning environment that allows you to thrive NOW is more important than something that may or may not be important to you in the future. I went to private schools for most of my schooling life and can say that private schools often provide students with a better academic grounding than public schools - the discipline is stricter and the level of professionalism of the school community (white collar parents etc) lends itself to the upper eschelons.

Sure, I was always the black sheep with my purple hair and nosering at school, but had I chosen to take advantage of the education, I could have done exceptionally well and proceeded to university on a scholarship. The bigger picture and the private-school "old boys network" means that employers and university's in sydney will take preference for someone schooled privately. Of course this may differ for your geographical location.

Given a choice, I'd rather be happy now. If I'm happy now I'm better able to make choices and develop opportunities for myself in the future. Besides, university isn't the be-all-and-end-all.... life is beautiful!

good luck! and don't let the man get you down.


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Azzor
member
Location: canberra, australia
Member Since: 17th Dec 2003
Total posts: 10
Posted:From experience, using teachers to stop harassment might keep them away, but it wont get you accepted by other people. The best advice i can give is to have confidence in yourself, so that everyone can subliminally see it. Not easy.
Back to your question... The earlier you leave that kind of environment, the earlier you can start to recover, so i guess i'd say go for the high school.

Rohan


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Deimos
Deimos

Cinnamon Girl
Location: Hfx, NS, Canada
Member Since: 22nd Aug 2003
Total posts: 191
Posted:I know what the initial reaction is when peopla hear "private school", and I totally agreed with that mentality until I found Shambhala. It's a tiny private school that is Buddhism based, but religion isn't an issue. They are heavily arts based and all the students there are original and interesting. I made about 20 new friends when I went for a day, they're all so kind.
I get harrased at school because the grand majority is (forgive my not being able to find a more suitible term) "urban". You know, do-rags and pants down past your knees. Most of them are extremely rude and the teachers try to handle them but to no avail. It's hard to keep a low profile when you wear phat pants, piercings, skirts over jeans and varying degrees of weird hair. They've made my life extremely hard and are making the more sensible decision of waiting to leave until next year seem more unbearable.


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ShyFysh
ShyFysh

member
Location: Normal, Illinois, USA
Member Since: 5th Apr 2003
Total posts: 19
Posted:Go to the other school now. It seems silly to stay where you are being hurt. Don't worry about university. If you are destined to go you will. When the time comes there will be a way. Protect yourself now. Be happy now. The future is irrelevant if you are "broken down" from the horrible experiences you are dealing with. You need to have a positive school experience so that you will be able to handle university.

Good luck with whatever you decide. hug


In the Eyes of the Goddess...All are Equal, All are Worthy ~Pa'u Zotah Zhaan

I honor the Divine within ~Rev Bem

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OrangeBobo
OrangeBobo

veteran
Location: Guelph, ON, Canada
Member Since: 21st Nov 2003
Total posts: 1389
Posted:What school is it you go to again? No matter, come live with me, and go to the West ubblol

Hmm, but seriously, have you told your problem to the guidance councillor/vp/principal? It's worth a try, but from what I'm hearing they're too busy trying to keep the regular students in order... :S

IMHO university is more important, especially seeing the price of tuition, if you're planning to stay in Hfx. But, then again, you could work your ass off, make the money, and of course, get scholarships.

I think it really depends on what you want to do after highschool.

Erm... do you have any relatives in another area, so you can pretend you've moved there, when you really havent? I can't count the number of people who've done that to get into my school :rolleyes:

Well, the best of luck!!! hughughug

~ Bobo/Lindsay


wie weit, wie weit noch?
fragst mich, wo wir gewesen sind...
du fehlst hier

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vanize
vanize

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Austin, Texas
Member Since: 21st Aug 2001
Total posts: 3899
Posted:the university degree is far more important as far as quality of life is concerned in the long run. a high school degree literally means nothing after you've gotten your college degree. The problem is, you need to get that far first.

I personally hated high school. University was so much better that I can't even begin to express how much better it was. In fact, if you ask me, high school is about the worst time in life. You couldn't pay me enough money to go back.

So basically there are two ways to looks at it. Either "grin and bare it", and just survive till it is time to go to university, or realize that life at that school is just too crap to put up with. The latter is the way too look at it if you are seriously considering dropping out rather than continue to go to that school. you have to finish high school in order to get to university (usually, but not always), so it is better to switch schools now and actually finish your high school diploma and worry about what to do about university later if you just can't take it anymore.

If you can take it, then I say it may be best to ride it out out if you only have a a year or two left and it will hurt your finances at university. If you have more than two years, well, being an underclassman is always hell, and things may get better when you become a junior or senior. But frankly I only think my senior year was tolerable because I gained 30 lbs of muscle from 16 to 17 and suddenly people didn't feel like picking on me as much anymore.

Most kids in high school suck personality wise. that is especially true for those that don't see much hope in their future. It winds up being people like you who, by the end of college, are the ones in the drivers seat. I was a super geek in high school. by my ten year renunion, all the popular kids were, for the most part, absolute nobodies. all the guys that used to give me hell were pathetic losers with miserable lives. most of my geek friends from high school were finishing graduate degrees or secure in good jobs.

If you ask me, half of what will make you succeed later in life is the perseverance that is being instilled in you now. learn to fight, not physically, but mentally, and you will become strong. just don't make yourself a martyr with that philosophy. if it is so bad you can't continue, then put first things first - switch schools so you at least get that high school diploma. you can worry about the rest later if need be.


-v-

Wiederstand ist Zwecklos!

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Dunc
Dunc

playing the days away
Location: The Middle lands
Member Since: 19th Aug 2003
Total posts: 7263
Posted:I know what you mean Deimos, your avator says it all. I had the same at school, I was tall and thin and the obvious target for all the assh*oles and it's damn hard to get through it but you will mate. University counts for so much more in this world than a High School diploma. And you'll appreciate the cash a lot more then when you're a little older for all the fun things you're about to discover!!

All the best, grit your teeth a beare it, at uni you'll forget all about them and no doubt they'll forget about you too. You 'll have new friends and it'll you'll be stronger for it.

Peace!


Let's relight this forum ubblove

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originalsmit
originalsmit

addict
Location: nottingham, england. cornwall ...
Member Since: 28th Aug 2003
Total posts: 469
Posted:Im just reading through this, i have little advice to give (but the school does sound very nice) as i have never been to university, i am not a particularly scholarly person.
Just one thing occured to me, is there anyone on the entire of HOP who wasnt endlessly picked on by trendy wankers at school, i bloody was and it seems like as well as being the biggest collection of fire jugglers etc online, we are probably the biggest collection of misfits as well.
Anyone care to contradict me??? im intruiged
still meet any of the bullies from school and you can give them flaming poideath fro their sins
Whatever you choose demios, work hard, i drifted aimlessly through education, im quite well read but id love to have learnt another language, just make sure you do that for me, learn spanish or something i didnt and i regret it.
oh and dont do high level pyshics it bites


my original signature was tooo long.
this one is shorter

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Deimos
Deimos

Cinnamon Girl
Location: Hfx, NS, Canada
Member Since: 22nd Aug 2003
Total posts: 191
Posted:Quote:

Whatever you choose demios, work hard, i drifted aimlessly through education, im quite well read but id love to have learnt another language, just make sure you do that for me, learn spanish or something i didnt and i regret it.


Done and done! I'm already fluent in french! but we'll see if maybe I can throw a little spanish in there somewhere! wink


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[Nx?]
[Nx?]

Carpal \'Tunnel
Location: Europe,Scotland,Both
Member Since: 5th Nov 2001
Total posts: 3749
Posted:well,

id say, if youve got 2 years or more left, move. you can always find ways to go to uni if you have to, scollerships, loans, getting a cleaning job and sneaking into lectures. My brother went to a private (quaker) school becuase he was having so much trouble in the comprehensive, and it changed his life. when i went to see the place i was soo jelouse because the learning enviroment was soooo much better. If you are an academic sort of person anyway then you shouldent have any troubles finding a scolership.

University is great for the picked on, because suddenly you find yourself amongst peers, and its a good thing to look forward to, but if your life at school is so bad that you wont get the grades to go to uni, then chaging school has to be the priority.

intresting what was said about everyone being picked on in school, I was too, and although it didnt really kill me, it has made me a very close person who finds it difficult to be sociable and open in groups.

T wave


This is a post by tom, all spelling is deleberate
-><- Kallisti

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pounce
pounce

All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all a...
Member Since: 10th Jan 2003
Total posts: 9831
Posted:Quote:
the university degree is far more important as far as quality of life is concerned in the long run. a high school degree literally means nothing after you've gotten your college degree. The problem is, you need to get that far first.



ah, and there's the connundrum. you have a better chance of getting into a good unviersity if you come from a good high school. and more importantly, if you are miserable and not doing well because of it, your grades will reflect that and make it more difficult to get into university as well. i still think that you can always get scholarships or loans or grants for university. that's what i did and what pretty much all of my friends did. it's frustrating, but worth it at the end.


I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

**giggles**

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Rouge Dragon
Rouge Dragon

Insert Champagne Here
Location: without class distinction
Member Since: 21st Jul 2003
Total posts: 13215
Posted:i think that being happy now at high school and being in a comfortable environment is better. i dont know how ur university works over there (and i actually have no clue over here for that matter! lol) but like someone said (sorry, dont remember who!), maybe you can apply for financial aid?

why particularly do you need to go to a private school? are there other schools that will provide a better environment for you? and does the private school have scholarships?

i think your happiness now is more important. pounce is right, if you are having a hard time at high school you might not have the motivation for the scores to get you into uni.

goodluck with whatever you decide to do!


i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey

Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...

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