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DuncGOLD Member
playing the days away
7,263 posts
Location: The Middle lands, United Kingdom


Posted:
Today I heard a new joke and just have to share it with the world....

Two monkeys were sitting in a bath....one says to the other (in Monkey speak) "hoo hoo hah hah hee hah hoo hoo hah hee hee hah"
and the other says
"Well put some cold water in then!"

Laugh?!.....I nearly wet my pants!!

ubbloco biggrin ubbtickled ubbrollsmile ubblol



weavesmiley

Let's relight this forum ubblove


sunbeamSILVER Member
old hand
1,032 posts
Location: Madrid, United Kingdom


Posted:
ubblol

lol

here have a monkey for your trouble
Non-Https Image Link

"I don't take drugs. I am drugs" - Salvador Dali

sunny


DeepSoulSheepGOLD Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
2,617 posts
Location: Berlin, Ireland


Posted:
Was it Simian and Bovril? tongue ubbtickled

I live in a world of infinite possibilities.


GottaLoveItSponge
883 posts
Location: Stevenage


Posted:
Took me a while but I got it, very funny ubblol

Monkeys monkeys and bananas


flidBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
3,136 posts
Location: Warwickshire, United Kingdom


Posted:
2 nuns sitting in a bath, one nun says to the other nun "where's the soap?". The other says "yes it does doesn't it"

Pink...?BRONZE Member
Mistress of Pink...Multicoloured
6,140 posts
Location: Over There, United Kingdom


Posted:
Whats pink and fluffy?

Pink Fluff ubbangel
ubblol

Never pick up a duck in a dungeon...


pounceSILVER Member
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA


Posted:
Quote:

Whats pink and fluffy?

Pink Fluff ubbangel
ubblol




LMAO. see that's the kind of jokes i like. they crack me up.

I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

**giggles**


pounceSILVER Member
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA


Posted:
Quote:

Today I heard a new joke and just have to share it with the world....




just noticed this.....does that mean us people at home of poi are the world?

biggrin

wow, i feel important!

I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

**giggles**


Pink...?BRONZE Member
Mistress of Pink...Multicoloured
6,140 posts
Location: Over There, United Kingdom


Posted:
Me too Pounce. I like simple jokes. (Ok granted thats because i'm slow ubbangel)

Never pick up a duck in a dungeon...


pounceSILVER Member
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA


Posted:
did you read my jokes on [Old link]

i think you'll enjoy them wink

I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

**giggles**


Pink...?BRONZE Member
Mistress of Pink...Multicoloured
6,140 posts
Location: Over There, United Kingdom


Posted:
Yeah, i did read them.

I was laughing my glasses off (well i wasn't really laughing my head off as it's still attached but my glasses really did fall off)

biggrin
ubblove

Never pick up a duck in a dungeon...


pounceSILVER Member
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA


Posted:
i've got a new one for ya!

what did the farmer say when he lost his truck?

(in best hillbilly accent) damn i lost my truck!

I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

**giggles**


Pink...?BRONZE Member
Mistress of Pink...Multicoloured
6,140 posts
Location: Over There, United Kingdom


Posted:
Oh that's brillaint ubblol

biggrin

Never pick up a duck in a dungeon...


originalsmitSILVER Member
addict
469 posts
Location: nottingham, england. cornwall wales denmark or pra...


Posted:

how many vietnam vets does it take to change a lightbulb?
dont know
TO RIGHT YOU DONT YOU KNOW YOU WERENT THERE!!!

whats yellow and dangerous?
shark infested custard! (so old it has great grandkids)

what goes ping pop bippedybippedybopbipbopbippedpoppedbipbopbipbopbipopbipbopbbipbipboppedy bippy bipbopbipbop
a ping pong ball in a tornado

man walks into a bar "ouch"

maybe not such a wasted youth after all wink

my original signature was tooo long.
this one is shorter


pounceSILVER Member
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA


Posted:
LMAO

**happy sigh**

i love stupid jokes. they're the best.

I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

**giggles**


GnorBRONZE Member
Carpal \'Tunnel
5,814 posts
Location: Perth, Australia


Posted:
Why did the rabbit walk down the mall with a canoe on his head?
To get an icecream

You know what... I still dont get it.

Is it the Truth?
Is it Fair to all concerned?
Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?

Im in a lonely battle with the world with a fish to match the chip on my shoulder. Gnu in Binnu in a cnu


DuncGOLD Member
playing the days away
7,263 posts
Location: The Middle lands, United Kingdom


Posted:
Quote:

just noticed this.....does that mean us people at home of poi are the world?




There's a world outside of HOP??!! WHY DIDN'T ANYONE SAY!!!!!

HEE HEE, Ok, today's contributions are....

What kind of Fence goes on strike? confused
A PICKET FENCE!!!! ubbidea

Why can't a bicycle stand up? confused
IT'S TWO TIRED!!! ubblol

and finally....

How do you make a venetian blind?
POKE HIM IN THE EYE!!! rolleyes

biggrin weavesmiley

Let's relight this forum ubblove


pounceSILVER Member
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA


Posted:
**giggles**

what did the judge say when the skunk walked into the courtroom?

ODOR! ODOR IN THE COURT!


**giggles**

what do you call a flying skunk?

a smellicopter!

**giggles**

i crack myself up!

I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

**giggles**


MandSILVER Member
Keeper of the Spitfire
2,317 posts
Location: Calgary Canada


Posted:
Quote:

Whats pink and fluffy?

Pink Fluff ubbangel




Whats blue and fluffy?
Pink fluff holding its breath biggrin

Whats green and slippery?
A green slipper ubblol wink

Hehe- a major part of my job is telling kids cheesy jokes! I love it!

Lets steal a spaceship and head for the sun, and shoot the stars with a lemonade ray gun.


pounceSILVER Member
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA


Posted:
Quote:

Quote:

Whats pink and fluffy?

Pink Fluff ubbangel




Whats blue and fluffy?
Pink fluff holding its breath biggrin





OMG that is so freaking funny!!!!

wow. simple things really do amuse me.

I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

**giggles**


MandSILVER Member
Keeper of the Spitfire
2,317 posts
Location: Calgary Canada


Posted:
Yippee, a better response than i get off a lot of kids! (they usually think a joke isnt funny if its not rude).

Hmmm... lets see...
Whats green and fluffy?
Pink fluff being sick biggrin ubblol

Whats white and fluffy?
Pink fluff disguised as a cloud. biggrin ubblol

Lets steal a spaceship and head for the sun, and shoot the stars with a lemonade ray gun.


Narr(*) (*) .. for the gnor ;)
2,568 posts
Location: sitting on the step


Posted:
hehe!! ubblol

she who sees from up high smiles

Patrick badger king: *they better hope there's never a jihad on stupidity*


pounceSILVER Member
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA


Posted:
hahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

omg, you could tell me jokes for hours. ahh, the pillow talk we would have! ubblol

er, um, **blushes** ubblol

ok, so i'll share my ridiculously stupid, makes no sense, but cracks me up every time, joke with ya.

(i made this joke up when i was little. what's scary is i met someone who apparently also made the joke up. weird.)

knock knock.
who's there?
MICKEY MOUSE'S UNDERWEAR!!!!

ubblol ubblol ubblol ubblol

ahh.....wanders away, shaking head and muttering, "simple things...."

I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

**giggles**


MandSILVER Member
Keeper of the Spitfire
2,317 posts
Location: Calgary Canada


Posted:
Hehe ubblol ubblol

What do monkeys and acid rain have in common?
They both f*ck up trees. ubblol

Did you hear about the magic tractor?
It went down the road and turned into a field! biggrin ubblol

Hahaha- well at least i manage to keep myself amused!

Lets steal a spaceship and head for the sun, and shoot the stars with a lemonade ray gun.


pounceSILVER Member
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA


Posted:
ubblol

why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
because it was dead!

why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?
because it was stapled to the first monkey!

why did the third monkey fall out of the tree?
PEER PRESSURE!!!!


ubblol ubblol ubblol ubblol

yes i know, bad jokes...

I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

**giggles**


MandSILVER Member
Keeper of the Spitfire
2,317 posts
Location: Calgary Canada


Posted:
Thats my favourite ever joke- i love it! Hehe!
To carry on...

Quote:

why did the monkey fall out of the tree?
because it was dead!

why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?
because it was stapled to the first monkey!

why did the third monkey fall out of the tree?
PEER PRESSURE!!!!




Why did the elephant fall out of the tree?
It thought it was a monkey!

Why did the giraffe get a headache?
Three monkeys and an elephant fell on its head!
ubblol ubblol ubblol

(yes i know- small things, small minds...) ubblol

Lets steal a spaceship and head for the sun, and shoot the stars with a lemonade ray gun.


pounceSILVER Member
All the neurotic makings of America's lesser known sweetheart
9,831 posts
Location: body in Las Vegas, heart all around the world, USA


Posted:
oh my goddess i nearly fell out of my chair laughing!!!

ahhh, i need to go buy some laffy taffy and get more stupid jokes ubblol those tend to have goods ones on them too.

I was always scared with my mother's obsession with the good scissors. It made me wonder if there were evil scissors lurking in the house somewhere.

Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

**giggles**


Pink...?BRONZE Member
Mistress of Pink...Multicoloured
6,140 posts
Location: Over There, United Kingdom


Posted:
ubblol Oh those are brillaint jokes, although i didn't get the Mickey Mouse one frown (i know i know i'm slow and thick)

ubblove

Never pick up a duck in a dungeon...


DuncGOLD Member
playing the days away
7,263 posts
Location: The Middle lands, United Kingdom


Posted:
What's Yellow and Orange and Fluffy?
Pink Fluff on Fire!!

What's brown and fluffy?
Pink Fluff that's been up my bum!!

OMG!! I've been lead astray by the pink Fluff Jokes ubbloco and I'm not sure if there'll ever be any return!! Will my life ever be the same again??!!


Let's relight this forum ubblove


DuncGOLD Member
playing the days away
7,263 posts
Location: The Middle lands, United Kingdom


Posted:
What do you call a fly with no wings??

A WALK!!! HA AHA HA and not a mention of fluff....d'oh! I've said it now! rolleyes

Let's relight this forum ubblove


DuncGOLD Member
playing the days away
7,263 posts
Location: The Middle lands, United Kingdom


Posted:
AND!

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you glad I didn't say Banana?


ubbrollsmile

Let's relight this forum ubblove


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