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Rouge Dragon
BRONZE Member since Jul 2003

Rouge Dragon

Insert Champagne Here
Location: without class distinction

Total posts: 13215
Posted:This is the official post for the singles in opposition to the love post!

(im going to laugh so much is Vanize makes a singles topic at the same time! lol!)


i would have changed ***** to phallus, and claire to petey Petey

Rougie: but that's what I'm doing here
Arnwyn: what letting me adjust myself in your room?..don't you dare quote that on HoP...

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blu_valley
SILVER Member since Apr 2005

blu_valley

fluffy mess
Location: Brighton

Total posts: 197
Posted:Facinating for you maybe, try living it from the inside ubblol

"I want to know if you can see beauty even when it's not pretty, every day,and if you can source your own life from its presence.." - Oriah Mountain Dreamer

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Matty_B
SILVER Member since Feb 2005

Matty_B

veteran
Location: Blu's Pocket

Total posts: 1314
Posted:Post deleted by Matty_B

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Matty_B
SILVER Member since Feb 2005

Matty_B

veteran
Location: Blu's Pocket

Total posts: 1314
Posted:* took Birgit's advice and deleted drunken ramblings . . .

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Birgit
BRONZE Member since Jan 2005

Birgit

had her carpal tunnel surgery already thanks v much
Location: Edinburgh

Total posts: 4145
Posted:you could've just deleted it tongue

here's a hug anyway. I like hugging people.


"vices are like genitals - most are ugly to behold, and yet we find that our own are dear to us."
(G.W. Dahlquist)

Owner of Dragosani's left half

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_Stix_


_Stix_

Pooh-Bah
Location: la-la land

Total posts: 2419
Posted:meh.. saturday night and I'm looking forward to a bath and my pajama's..

hotwater bottle - check
slippers - check
slushy dvd - urm.. drat - will have to watch the tele instead
bottle of wine for one - check... (it's the same size as a bottle for two - I will just have more of a head ache tomorrow..

yay (boooooooooooo) for illness and saturday nights - missing the Toastie's party tonight for which one is most annoyed.


I honour you as an aspect of myself..

You are never to old to storm a bouncey castle..

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pineapple pete
SILVER Member since Sep 2004

pineapple pete

water based
Location: melbourne

Total posts: 5125
Posted:mmm, am still sitting about here

hug kiss


"you know there are no trophys for doing silly things in real life yeah pete?" said ant "you wont get a 'listened to ride of the valkyries all the way to vietnam' trophy"

*proud owner of the very cute fire_spinning_angel, birgit and neon shaolin*

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Brenn
PLATINUM Member since Jun 2004

Brenn

Will carpal your tunnel in a minute.
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Total posts: 3286
Posted: Written by: pineapple pete


mmm, am still sitting about here

hug kiss



As am I smile hug
Sorry for not replying on MSN earlier - i was sleeping off a 3 course meal of vodka ubblol


ॐ

Owner of burningoftheclavey smile
Owned by Lost83spy

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Birgit
BRONZE Member since Jan 2005

Birgit

had her carpal tunnel surgery already thanks v much
Location: Edinburgh

Total posts: 4145
Posted:So... I went to this Valentine's Day Massacre thing last night, an anti-Valentine's party at a friend's place. And ended up with the anti-Valentine's party host. I'm sure that wasn't the intention of the party confused

"vices are like genitals - most are ugly to behold, and yet we find that our own are dear to us."
(G.W. Dahlquist)

Owner of Dragosani's left half

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87wt2gxq7


87wt2gxq7

veteran
Location: Birmingham

Total posts: 1502
Posted:Rubbish! Of course it was the intention of the party!

Also, well done! wink


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Birgit
BRONZE Member since Jan 2005

Birgit

had her carpal tunnel surgery already thanks v much
Location: Edinburgh

Total posts: 4145
Posted:you weren't there! They had a cardbox hammer that you got hit with if you said words like "couple" and "mortgage"! I think the actual intention was to hit people a lot.

It's not like I'm complaining, it's just potentially making things quite complicated shrug


"vices are like genitals - most are ugly to behold, and yet we find that our own are dear to us."
(G.W. Dahlquist)

Owner of Dragosani's left half

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87wt2gxq7


87wt2gxq7

veteran
Location: Birmingham

Total posts: 1502
Posted:A bunch of people getting together on or around Valentine's Day, throwing a party that's all about how they're single and bitter about it... of course they're secretly hoping to hook up!



I reckon anyway.





 Written by: Birgit

I think the actual intention was to hit people a lot.



Hit on people more like wink tongue


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Birgit
BRONZE Member since Jan 2005

Birgit

had her carpal tunnel surgery already thanks v much
Location: Edinburgh

Total posts: 4145
Posted:As far as I can tell there wasn't that much pairing up going on... and may I just say, I was NOT bitter about the single thing... and now who knows, I might even lose my home here! eek

"vices are like genitals - most are ugly to behold, and yet we find that our own are dear to us."
(G.W. Dahlquist)

Owner of Dragosani's left half

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_Stix_


_Stix_

Pooh-Bah
Location: la-la land

Total posts: 2419
Posted:It wasn't Strugz was it? The Toasties were hosting a 'Valentine's Massacre' last night.. He would have been there, and as we all know needs a girlfreind.. wink

(good on ya tho - everyone needs a little attention everynow and then ubbrollsmile)


I honour you as an aspect of myself..

You are never to old to storm a bouncey castle..

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87wt2gxq7


87wt2gxq7

veteran
Location: Birmingham

Total posts: 1502
Posted: Written by: Birgit


and may I just say, I was NOT bitter about the single thing...


yeah, true dat (judging from emails anyway)

Suppose that's a lesson along the lines of "if you're not desperate for it, it'll come"



 Written by: Birgit

and now who knows, I might even lose my home here! eek



You can always come back and visit. If you bring cake.
*playfully flicks bits of cake at you*
wink


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Birgit
BRONZE Member since Jan 2005

Birgit

had her carpal tunnel surgery already thanks v much
Location: Edinburgh

Total posts: 4145
Posted:Nah, it was definitely in Edinburgh... ubblol Strugz is popular enough without me getting involved there wink

I'll just sit here and wait a while and see what happens smile In the meantime, have some molehill cake biggrin

http://www.muszynski.de/rezepte/maulwurfkuchen.jpg


"vices are like genitals - most are ugly to behold, and yet we find that our own are dear to us."
(G.W. Dahlquist)

Owner of Dragosani's left half

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_Stix_


_Stix_

Pooh-Bah
Location: la-la land

Total posts: 2419
Posted:I wonder if he pulled Keith last night..
not wanting to start any rumours, but they have always got on very well and there would have been a lot of alcohol involved last night... :/


I honour you as an aspect of myself..

You are never to old to storm a bouncey castle..

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Birgit
BRONZE Member since Jan 2005

Birgit

had her carpal tunnel surgery already thanks v much
Location: Edinburgh

Total posts: 4145
Posted:Who's Keith? ubblol and should we not put strugz-related rumours in the strugz thread? though it's more fun if we keep them here where he can't defend himself I suppose.

"vices are like genitals - most are ugly to behold, and yet we find that our own are dear to us."
(G.W. Dahlquist)

Owner of Dragosani's left half

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Brenn
PLATINUM Member since Jun 2004

Brenn

Will carpal your tunnel in a minute.
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Total posts: 3286
Posted:Aaah, L'amour... ubblol

ॐ

Owner of burningoftheclavey smile
Owned by Lost83spy

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Neon_Shaolin
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

Neon_Shaolin

hehe, 'Member' huhuh
Location: Behind you. With Jam

Total posts: 6120
Posted:I'm in a bit of a mental quandry at the moment...



Last year I went out with this guy (call him X for now) and often stayed at his house. After a month or two he moved in with another bunch of mates. When I popped round I was immediately taken with his housemate (whom we'll call Y)



After a while I found that I much preferred Y to X as I seemed to have much more in common with Y. X whilst being a cute, nice guy, was a bit too laid back for my liking and I just didn't click with him as much as I thought, and this was even before I met Y. Y was intelligent, witty, into films, had more 'fire in his belly' and just in general had something about him which I preferred.



It didn't matter that Y (as far as I knew) was as straight as they come. Just the fact that I was with someone whom I didn't feel as much for as I did someone else. So I broke up with him, and it turns out he didn't see it working either. But we stayed friends and I often stayed over on the sofa until X, Y and Z went off to travel around Europe in a converted ambulance. That was back in April last year.



Then I bumped into someone who told me that Y was back in England (living with his mum out of town) whilst X and Z are still out there. So I gave Y a text just telling him I was there if he ever wanted to chill out in Preston sometime not really expecting a response since even though I got along with him I'm sure there are other friends he'd rather hang with.



To my surprise he texted back asking if I wanted to go to the cinema. And so we did. Enjoyed the film immensely and it was good to see him. A week or two later he asked me if it I wanted to go to the cimema again and have a smoke. (and for me to get him some green)



It was good, the film was a laugh, we had a smoke and he stopped over, albeit on the sofa. But there was one point where he was quite quiet whilst being sprawled out on my bed. You can imagine how my mind was racing at that moment. I didn't try anything, I didn't even make ANY of the usual innuendos I'm quite known for!



It didn't help that he has invited me to Amsterdam (but as it turns out I can't go now)



I am left somewhat lost. Does he like me as a good friend? Was he just picking up from me? Or is there something more there? I am dying/screaming to find out, even if he is just straight and actually values my company as a friend, asking him at all will just ruin the friendship we have. So I am constantly mulling over the decision to say anything at all and suffer in silence, or should I take a chance and just ask him? I don't mind if he is straight and would just like to be friends. It's the not knowing that's driving me crazy...


"I used to want to change the world, now I just wanna leave the room with a little dignity..." - Lotus Weinstock

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blu_valley
SILVER Member since Apr 2005

blu_valley

fluffy mess
Location: Brighton

Total posts: 197
Posted:Oooh, tough one. I'm terrible at this sort of stuff, so I wont offer advice and just give you a hug and wish you luck!

"I want to know if you can see beauty even when it's not pretty, every day,and if you can source your own life from its presence.." - Oriah Mountain Dreamer

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Dentrassi
GOLD Member since Apr 2003

Dentrassi

ZORT!
Location: Brisbane

Total posts: 3044
Posted: Written by: Neon_Shaolin


It was good, the film was a laugh, we had a smoke and he stopped over, albeit on the sofa. But there was one point where he was quite quiet whilst being sprawled out on my bed. You can imagine how my mind was racing at that moment. I didn't try anything, I didn't even make ANY of the usual innuendos I'm quite known for!




oh man i feel your pain - i seem to find myself in that situation (along with mental quandries you mentioned) far too frequently. on one hand its really fantastic that a whole bunch of guys out there are really cool with gay guys and completely non-homophobic... but it makes it as confusing as hell at the same time...

i have absolutely no advice to give you, because im completely as incapable of dealing with that situation myself... mind racing but still too uncertain to be any more forward.... it really raises questions about my so called confidence when i find myself as nervous as a 16 yr old again...

*le sigh*

E ubbrollsmile


"Here kitty kitty...." - Schroedinger.

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Birgit
BRONZE Member since Jan 2005

Birgit

had her carpal tunnel surgery already thanks v much
Location: Edinburgh

Total posts: 4145
Posted:I'd say ask him... maybe find a way to get it across to him that you're aware he might just be interested in a friendly manner and you're not assuming anything? Though you probably should be taking exactly the opposite advice from what I say, I seem to be getting myself into a lot of trouble lately redface

"vices are like genitals - most are ugly to behold, and yet we find that our own are dear to us."
(G.W. Dahlquist)

Owner of Dragosani's left half

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Neon_Shaolin
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

Neon_Shaolin

hehe, 'Member' huhuh
Location: Behind you. With Jam

Total posts: 6120
Posted:I know, it makes the whole moving on thing that whole lot more difficult if you don't have closure... hug
This is probably why alot of us CAN'T grow up... frown

Any advice from you straight lads?


"I used to want to change the world, now I just wanna leave the room with a little dignity..." - Lotus Weinstock

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Neon_Shaolin
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

Neon_Shaolin

hehe, 'Member' huhuh
Location: Behind you. With Jam

Total posts: 6120
Posted:No Birgit, ANY advice is welcome...

It's the usual case of being able to give sound advice to other people but being unable to follow your own in your own situation... frown


"I used to want to change the world, now I just wanna leave the room with a little dignity..." - Lotus Weinstock

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Zenooph
SILVER Member since Aug 2006

Zenooph

psychadelic pyro
Location: Johannesburg

Total posts: 570
Posted:Dave, I have a gay mate who's very close to my heart and I'm just generally friendly with everyone, but he thought that I was interested in being more than friends, so he asked me if I was really sending him signals or if I was just being a very friendly person. I told him that I'm straight and I just really enjoy his company as a friend and to this day we are still really good friends.

I know it must have taken a lot of courage for him to ask me that and I respected him for that.

I hope that helps mate!


Normality is the playground of the unimaginative

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Birgit
BRONZE Member since Jan 2005

Birgit

had her carpal tunnel surgery already thanks v much
Location: Edinburgh

Total posts: 4145
Posted:It's not that I'm unable to follow my own advice, but that I'll have to disappoint someone and choose between "options" that are completely different and both very tempting and with problems on the horizon. And I'd rather not have to but waiting longer is just going to make it worse. ubbcrying

Maybe deciding against both would be the best plan.


"vices are like genitals - most are ugly to behold, and yet we find that our own are dear to us."
(G.W. Dahlquist)

Owner of Dragosani's left half

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Neon_Shaolin
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

Neon_Shaolin

hehe, 'Member' huhuh
Location: Behind you. With Jam

Total posts: 6120
Posted:Cheers. That helps loads...
hug
The problem is that I do tend to both underestimate AND overestimate the open-mindedness of my male friends...

I assume its almost exactly like a man asking one of his female friends out and vice versa. There is more to lose if it goes wrong...

The only time I can admit such feelings is when I 100% know that nothing will come of it...


"I used to want to change the world, now I just wanna leave the room with a little dignity..." - Lotus Weinstock

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Sambo_Flux
GOLD Member since Jun 2006

Sambo_Flux

Introverted
Location: Norf London

Total posts: 833
Posted:The last time I was in a situation like that, I decided to come right out and say how I felt, and I ended up losing someone who could have been a really good friend (and a local spinning buddy as well). I wish I'd kept my mouth shut now, and let it develop naturally rather than forcing it. It's a really hard call though. My instinct in that situation would probably to just keep it as friends until you know more about his inclinations.

Still the uncertainty is nightmarish. Have some of these as a remedy!

hug hug


My Mind is a Ship
Emotions become the Waves
Soul is the Ocean

If a quizz is quizzical, what is a test?

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Neon_Shaolin
GOLD Member since Jul 2005

Neon_Shaolin

hehe, 'Member' huhuh
Location: Behind you. With Jam

Total posts: 6120
Posted:Cheers... hug

I'm gonna keep my trap shut but I feel better know.

I'm ashamed to say I had forgotten the amount of really good straight male friends I have. I blame the whole 'blast from the past' and re-awakened feelings for my momentary bit of tunnel vision. Talking about it helped and hearing other people's thoughts definitely helped.

For now, the ball is in his court...


"I used to want to change the world, now I just wanna leave the room with a little dignity..." - Lotus Weinstock

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Matty_B
SILVER Member since Feb 2005

Matty_B

veteran
Location: Blu's Pocket

Total posts: 1314
Posted:Right might as well say what I think . . .



I am guessing he knows you are gay, and therefore the right moment will turn up if it is meant to....



Just make sure there are opportunities.. Time spent together, but not "together" is not really wasted.... It just means that you will be both more sure if/when it happens that it is right.



Think of it this way you'll either going to end up with a really good friend or really nice boyfriend either way it is gonna make you happy. smile



Personally I have cocked up a couple of opportunities with ladies by trying to second guess / trying to hard . . the best thing is to be yourself... and not over analyse

EDITED_BY: Matty_B (1171900217)


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