Forums > Social Chat > Wrong turn....
Login/Join to ParticipateSILVER Member
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2,996 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
100 characters max...
2,996 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Posted:
I have been missing in action for about three weeks now, due to a new job. After swearing that I would never work full time again, a job opportunity came up that seemed good.
It was a risk from the start. I knew there was something about the people that wasn't quite right from the interview stage. But the job itself was challenging, my cash situation was getting dire, and my old company looked perilously close to going down the tubes.
It appears I should have trusted my gut instincts. My boss is a total psycho, and I feel like I am right back where I was two years ago in the midst of a deep depression.
So I am trying hard to keep it in perspective, and I need your help. These are the things I am telling myself so far:
1. I said it was a three month trial, and the result of the trial is that I don't want the job.
2. This is one month of my life, just a short detour on the road to where I want to be.
3. This is definitely not my psychosis, this time around I can really see which ones are my problems, and which ones are theirs.
4. My home and social life at the moment is a joy.
5. I have great friends.
any more mantras?
I have been missing in action for about three weeks now, due to a new job. After swearing that I would never work full time again, a job opportunity came up that seemed good.
It was a risk from the start. I knew there was something about the people that wasn't quite right from the interview stage. But the job itself was challenging, my cash situation was getting dire, and my old company looked perilously close to going down the tubes.
It appears I should have trusted my gut instincts. My boss is a total psycho, and I feel like I am right back where I was two years ago in the midst of a deep depression.
So I am trying hard to keep it in perspective, and I need your help. These are the things I am telling myself so far:
1. I said it was a three month trial, and the result of the trial is that I don't want the job.
2. This is one month of my life, just a short detour on the road to where I want to be.
3. This is definitely not my psychosis, this time around I can really see which ones are my problems, and which ones are theirs.
4. My home and social life at the moment is a joy.
5. I have great friends.
any more mantras?
It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.
What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...
SILVER Member
Mumma Hen
6,391 posts
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Mumma Hen
6,391 posts
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Posted:
I choose to leave.
I choose to find a job that is more suited to my beautiful compassinate personality.
I choose to surround myself with people who are supportive of the path I have chosen in my life.
What have I learnt from this lesson?
THIS TOO SHALL PASS
I love you rozi... I will call you on asap...
I choose to leave.
I choose to find a job that is more suited to my beautiful compassinate personality.
I choose to surround myself with people who are supportive of the path I have chosen in my life.
What have I learnt from this lesson?
THIS TOO SHALL PASS
I love you rozi... I will call you on asap...
TAJ "boat mummy." VALURA "yes sweetie you went on a boat, was daddy there with you?" TAJ "no, but monkey on boat" VALURA "well then sweetie, Daddy WAS there with you"
Twister Fire Starter ridin on a tratter
156 posts
Location: Bristol/Exeter UK
156 posts
Location: Bristol/Exeter UK
Posted:
Starting a new job is always hard. So yeh, just keep open-minded and give it a trial. If its still crap in a few months find something else!
Good luck!
Starting a new job is always hard. So yeh, just keep open-minded and give it a trial. If its still crap in a few months find something else!
Good luck!
Caz
veteran
1,359 posts
Location: London/ Surrey
1,359 posts
Location: London/ Surrey
Posted:
One month into a 3 month trial and you've decided you don't want it? Fantastic! That means you can continue to be paid for another 2 months while you find something else. Then tell them.
One month into a 3 month trial and you've decided you don't want it? Fantastic! That means you can continue to be paid for another 2 months while you find something else. Then tell them.
The optimist claims that we are living in the best of all possible worlds.
The pessimist fears this is true.
Always make time to play in the snow.
GOLD Member
still can't believe it's not butter
6,978 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia
still can't believe it's not butter
6,978 posts
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Posted:
my watch says medical certificate o'clock
my watch says medical certificate o'clock
Laugh Often, Smile Much, Post lolcats Always
member
192 posts
Location: oxford
192 posts
Location: oxford
Posted:
quote:
Originally posted by bender™:
my watch says medical certificate o'clock
BRONZE Member
Corporate Circus Arts Entertainer
3,989 posts
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
Corporate Circus Arts Entertainer
3,989 posts
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
Posted:
Just to keep things in perspective...
No-one likes full-time after a period without it...of course it feels rotten.
What I see in this thread doesn't seem as important to me as what I DON'T see.
What made the job so fantastic that you were willing to take the risk? Is there any aspect of that still in th ejob wihtout the pyscho boss?
Are working in Australia? I know there are a lot of serious laws that protect aussie workers so if he is being a real pyscho, you may have a legitimate claim against the company, but you will have to tell him/them/her that there actions have been unacceptable and give them the chance to change first...
You took the job partly because of money? Has that situation changed drastically? If not, working in a job for 3 months looks bloody awful on a CV, so only quit if it seriously is affecting your mental health...
As already suggested, start looking around now, and try to find a job you WANT, not take one because of the job you want to leave...
Would you take the most likely partner at a party, just because there was no-one else available? (I hope not) Think about what you want and need, rather than taking something so you can leave this job...
In my opinion, of course...
Just to keep things in perspective...
No-one likes full-time after a period without it...of course it feels rotten.
What I see in this thread doesn't seem as important to me as what I DON'T see.
What made the job so fantastic that you were willing to take the risk? Is there any aspect of that still in th ejob wihtout the pyscho boss?
Are working in Australia? I know there are a lot of serious laws that protect aussie workers so if he is being a real pyscho, you may have a legitimate claim against the company, but you will have to tell him/them/her that there actions have been unacceptable and give them the chance to change first...
You took the job partly because of money? Has that situation changed drastically? If not, working in a job for 3 months looks bloody awful on a CV, so only quit if it seriously is affecting your mental health...
As already suggested, start looking around now, and try to find a job you WANT, not take one because of the job you want to leave...
Would you take the most likely partner at a party, just because there was no-one else available? (I hope not) Think about what you want and need, rather than taking something so you can leave this job...
In my opinion, of course...
HoP Posting Guidelines
* Is it the Truth?
* Is it Fair to all concerned?
* Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
* Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?
SILVER Member
100 characters max...
2,996 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
100 characters max...
2,996 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Posted:
It has the potential to be a great job in the work being done. I am designing, and going to be delivering a training course on Small Business Management to people hoping to get off unemployment benefit and begin running their own business. They also receive financial and mentoring support for a period of 12 months.
There are a couple of additional programs that also look good.
So yes, it is a good job from the perspective of the work being done.
Yes, the part-time/full-time transition has been hard. But I made sure I had things in place to deal with this.
Yes, it is early to make a judgement like this, but I know in my heart I am right. When I say my boss is psychotic, it is not a statement I make lightly. Over the past two weeks my heart rate and blood pressure has been way up over healthy limits. My boss micro-manages. She is meant to be the top manager in the office but she insists on giving an opinion on everything that everyone is doing, at a microscopic level ("I want you to photocopy in this way"). Still, that is manageable, even in a small office of 4 people.
However there is more. I can't really explain the full details. Suffice to say this woman has the ability to get everyone up to panic levels when things go wrong. She is very aggressive. She is also very paranoid about her own position. She is racist. Very prejudice against particular social groups, and basically holds a philosophy I do not agree with.
I was going to try and manage the situation. I had written down strategies about how I was going to deal with it, mainly using humour. However an incident last week which showed how poorly humour is received made my mind up for me.
This is a woman who boasts that she got the police to forcibly remove a former employee who put his feet up on the desk.
Unfortunately if I stay here I will go mad. And the cash situation doesn't matter so much as my sanity.
Don't worry, I am being wise. I am looking for the right job to go to, not just moving. And this will appear on my cv as a short-term contract, something that is fairly common in the training and adult education world.
It has the potential to be a great job in the work being done. I am designing, and going to be delivering a training course on Small Business Management to people hoping to get off unemployment benefit and begin running their own business. They also receive financial and mentoring support for a period of 12 months.
There are a couple of additional programs that also look good.
So yes, it is a good job from the perspective of the work being done.
Yes, the part-time/full-time transition has been hard. But I made sure I had things in place to deal with this.
Yes, it is early to make a judgement like this, but I know in my heart I am right. When I say my boss is psychotic, it is not a statement I make lightly. Over the past two weeks my heart rate and blood pressure has been way up over healthy limits. My boss micro-manages. She is meant to be the top manager in the office but she insists on giving an opinion on everything that everyone is doing, at a microscopic level ("I want you to photocopy in this way"). Still, that is manageable, even in a small office of 4 people.
However there is more. I can't really explain the full details. Suffice to say this woman has the ability to get everyone up to panic levels when things go wrong. She is very aggressive. She is also very paranoid about her own position. She is racist. Very prejudice against particular social groups, and basically holds a philosophy I do not agree with.
I was going to try and manage the situation. I had written down strategies about how I was going to deal with it, mainly using humour. However an incident last week which showed how poorly humour is received made my mind up for me.
This is a woman who boasts that she got the police to forcibly remove a former employee who put his feet up on the desk.
Unfortunately if I stay here I will go mad. And the cash situation doesn't matter so much as my sanity.
Don't worry, I am being wise. I am looking for the right job to go to, not just moving. And this will appear on my cv as a short-term contract, something that is fairly common in the training and adult education world.
It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.
What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...
SILVER Member
Mumma Hen
6,391 posts
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Mumma Hen
6,391 posts
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Posted:
you need to do whats right for you rozi... Get out hun.. Remember that this is a learning curve on the way to great things for you... You will be much better once you are out of such a high level stress enviournment. There will be another job around the courner for you....
you need to do whats right for you rozi... Get out hun.. Remember that this is a learning curve on the way to great things for you... You will be much better once you are out of such a high level stress enviournment. There will be another job around the courner for you....
TAJ "boat mummy." VALURA "yes sweetie you went on a boat, was daddy there with you?" TAJ "no, but monkey on boat" VALURA "well then sweetie, Daddy WAS there with you"
BRONZE Member
Corporate Circus Arts Entertainer
3,989 posts
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
Corporate Circus Arts Entertainer
3,989 posts
Location: Auckland, New Zealand
Posted:
Sorry to sound a bit harsh on this, Rozi...
But if this woman truly is as you say, it is your duty to other potential employees and the existing ones to discuss your situation with the authorities.
If she truly is this bad, then she has no right to be in a management position, and it the company as an employer needs to know that it is not fulfilling its legal obligations.
It soudns to me that she needs training herself, as well as the opportunity to change her way of working to one that does not affect her employees in such an awful way.
Of course it is my opinion, but I would contact the local authorites and see what can be done about it, as it is an acceptable situation from what I can tell.
Sorry to sound a bit harsh on this, Rozi...
But if this woman truly is as you say, it is your duty to other potential employees and the existing ones to discuss your situation with the authorities.
If she truly is this bad, then she has no right to be in a management position, and it the company as an employer needs to know that it is not fulfilling its legal obligations.
It soudns to me that she needs training herself, as well as the opportunity to change her way of working to one that does not affect her employees in such an awful way.
Of course it is my opinion, but I would contact the local authorites and see what can be done about it, as it is an acceptable situation from what I can tell.
HoP Posting Guidelines
* Is it the Truth?
* Is it Fair to all concerned?
* Will it build Goodwill and Better Friendships?
* Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?
SILVER Member
100 characters max...
2,996 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
100 characters max...
2,996 posts
Location: Sydney, NSW, Australia
Posted:
I know what you are saying, Charles, and you are correct, not harsh. However my first responsibility is to myself, to ensure that I have a way out of there and that this is not going to affect my working life.
I am not going to rely on these people for a reference, and so when I do resign, I will be able to do so without them causing problems for me. I just want to make sure I have a job to go to before I do anything else.
If I do anything, I am going to need to do this carefully. This is a battle that would be hard to fight. She is close friends with one of the board members, who is a lawyer. She also has strong political connections. She is not an idiot by any means. She is insecure and paranoid, but this has led her to put in place strong defenses and have excellent fighting tactics.
I know what you are saying, Charles, and you are correct, not harsh. However my first responsibility is to myself, to ensure that I have a way out of there and that this is not going to affect my working life.
I am not going to rely on these people for a reference, and so when I do resign, I will be able to do so without them causing problems for me. I just want to make sure I have a job to go to before I do anything else.
If I do anything, I am going to need to do this carefully. This is a battle that would be hard to fight. She is close friends with one of the board members, who is a lawyer. She also has strong political connections. She is not an idiot by any means. She is insecure and paranoid, but this has led her to put in place strong defenses and have excellent fighting tactics.
It was a day for screaming at inanimate objects.
What this calls for is a special mix of psychology and extreme violence...
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